well, he deserved that one. alex wasn’t heartless — even when he had made the dumb decision to cut ties with maeve for the slight chance that she would do it first, he still kept up with whatever news he could find on them. it felt like absolute shit every time something new came up, that he wasn’t there to celebrate with her, or to comfort her.
he wasn’t sure what he could say to alleviate all the pain that he’s caused, but he sure as shit wasn’t going to continue keeping his mouth shut trying to pretend like they weren’t even there.
“ i know i fucked up big time, maeve, alright ? i really fucking know that. i just… ” he trails off, looking at the wall right above her for a moment, trying to force the words from his brain out of his mouth for once. god, i could really use that silver fucking tongue right about now. the thing with alex’s ability to persuade and charm just about anyone ? that it wasn’t always so easy to conjure up as it is most of the time. not when there was genuine care for the person sitting in front of him. “ i was terrified when i left brighton. i have this… this stupid fucking idea that everyone is going to end up leaving me behind in the end. i thought that if i did it to you, i’d be doing it first. you have no fucking clue how many nights have kept me up about it.. but i just couldn’t bring myself to reach out. i couldn’t do it because… ” because i’m a coward. but the words weren’t coming out.
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“You are an idiot.” Maeve spits back, though they know they could say much worse and it would all be true. But idiot seems the most appropriate, the most fitting. Because Alex was an idiot. Once, they would have followed them to the ends of the earth. But now, they were struggling not to simply shatter the bottle in their hand. It took a concerted effort to loosen their grip and hold it lightly.
“So your answer was ghosting me? You cared about me so much, you just dropped off the face on the earth? Fuckin’ coward.”
But then Maeve is looking Alex dead on and realizing these are all things Rue would have every right to say to them. So they take another drink and visibly deflate, sitting back down. Besides, it’s not like Maeve ever tried to reach back out to Alex. They didn’t believe in closure and they had been content enough to let their resentment and anger simmer for seven years before they were forced to confront it.
“Fucking hell,” they curse, their free hand rubbing at their temple.