the joke that's never funny

[nonamenofayce]

#falloutboy #fob #vystarveteransmemorialarena #16march2024 #saturday

[nonamenofayce]

thinking maybe i need back in the blog life.

don't mind me, a few drinks in. i had this idea at work. unfortunately sober at the time.

and i wish i was sober now. 🙄

[nonamenofayce]

is it okay if i say hello

[nonamenofayce]

constantly trying to find my place

knowing that I've always known

i belong alone.

[nonamenofayce]

i don't know if i can last much longer

[nonamenofayce]

do you picture your death?

is it play by play?

do you watch it unfold?

do you imagine that it's peaceful?

graceful?

do you go out in slow motion?

you know it what i mean. the kind of slow motion where those who never thought you'd actually leave,

see the moment you walk away from them for the last time.

do you walk out of a closing door?

do you turn a corner and disappear?

or do you simply melt into the crowd?

how do you see yourself saying goodbye?

[nonamenofayce]

i miss my dead brother because he took my place

[nonamenofayce]

the things you leave behind don't matter

[nonamenofayce]

hardest thing about being in charge of your own death

is trying to figure out how no one that cares about you

finds you.

[nonamenofayce]

finds you first*

[nonamenofayce]

maybe I'll never find where i belong

[nonamenofayce]

lately I've been thinkin.

we're a flame in the wind

not the fire we began.

i think we both know the way this story ends.

in the cold light of day,

i want you to be happier.

i want to see you smile.

know that means I'll have to leave.

[nonamenofayce]

say hey if ur ready to die.

hey.

[nonamenofayce]

another s note.

i am truly sorry for any lingering sadness you may experience.

i promise that the hardest part is only temporary.

after a while it gets easier. especially cos sooner or later you start to realise that we never really were a key part in your life.

you may be sad at first but you'll move on.

you'll remember us from time to time but we'll be just that, a memory. a thing to remember.

at the end of everyday, you'll be okay without us.

and we're okay with that. because we know that if we're not here, suffering as we have always been, we'll be living the best times of our lives, in your minds.

[nonamenofayce]

know that means I'll have to leave

[nonamenofayce]

give up? or go on?

[nonamenofayce]

w e l l.

at least you can see in the dark

[nonamenofayce]

i would ask that you kill me now