A Small, Fat, Disgruntled Frog

Fat, crafty, modified anthro geek. Dog mom af. Professional vampire. I'm an enthusiast of guinea pigs, birds, body modification, dogs, primatology, SCIENCE, anthropology, zoology, medical science, and skeletal remains... but not necessarily in that order. Shamelessly loving all things Sleep Token. WORSHIP.

[butchfaith]

how it feels to become an active participant in your own life

[3rdrealm-deactivated20200301]

i think the crux of human misery stems from the fact that our skeleton just wants to sit around and accumulate dust in an ancient barrow (that is the innate imperative of all skeletal remains in-case you didn’t know) but our meat has its own agenda which creates this fundamental conflict of interests

[frostedmagnolias]

Afternoon Dress

c. 1875

by House of Worth

The Metropolitan Museum of Art

[summer-fire]

[phrear2]

sad feeling to try to mutualbait when the mutual you wanted to bait already finished their tumblr shift for the day

[eroscestlavie]

when you’re a gay lion and you accidentally tried to introduce your lesbian lioness friend to one of her own exes at a gay bar and she goes into the bathroom and bitches you out for not being able to tell her endlessly rotating cast of girlfriends apart which isn’t really fair because first of all they all keep dyeing their hair different colors and second of all she keeps getting back together with different ones at different times and meanwhile you’ve been “single” for like 8 months but are spending a lot of time with one specific guy who works at your old co-op and were going to excitedly tell her about it tonight but now you’ve ruined the whole subject of dating by trying to introduce her to her own ex at a gay bar (which is a watering hole. because you’re lions.) 

[corrucyst]

dude, this is really scary, and liminal as well. It's like the bathrooms

[catchyvideos]

OP mingbi on TikTok

[guineapiggies]

Via theroyalfurtatoes

[sacred-portal]

[sergal]

everyone shut da fuck up this is the only thing that matters

[90s-2000s-barbie]

Hilary Duff - Coming Clean (2003)

[texasbama]

[ruinedchildhood]

[christopherkluv]

[newbarktownalumni]

[clover11-10]

[h0n3y-c0m6]

[raman-noob]

[cleo-fox]

Writing tips:

“You feel the bulge in his pants” - implies that you are feeling some guy’s penis, may be sexy depending on context

“You feel the bugle in his pants” - implies that this guy has a military horn in his pants, invites confusing questions like why does he have that and how big are his pockets

[maple-seed]

Both options convey that he's horny

[cleo-fox]

How dare you be funnier than me on my own post

[my-dailydreams]

[pauljosephtwatson]

[24ozsteak]

you ever just hand things to ur pet to sniff so they can feel included

[baraphalloplastyclinic]

I actually do think we should discourage women from becoming housewives. Do not become financially dependent on a man. That's how a lot of women ended up dead over the years. A man gets violent suddenly and you have to choose between homelessness or potentially dying at his hand because you have an enormous gap in your resume and no degrees or certifications or anything that will help you pursue a career that will allow you to be financially independent. He owns your bank account. His name is probably the one on the car. Try and leave and he can report it stolen. Where will you go then?

Don't become a housewife.

[ladyfoxfire]

And if you do become a housewife, take steps to protect yourself. Make sure you’re legally married, for starters; stay-at-home girlfriends have very little legal recourse to claim their partner’s assets in a breakup. Make sure your name is on the house deed/rental agreement, and have your car in your name, even if your spouse is paying for it. Have your spouse transfer money every month into an account solely in your name, so you can buy yourself things without needing permission, but also so you can save up to leave if needed.

If your spouse fights you on any of this, then don’t quit your job. The tradwife to poverty pipeline is real, and so is financial abuse.