🫧ABOUT EPISODE --- the writer tells you about themselves .
🖱️DO NOT REPUBLISH, TRANSLATE, ALTER, OR FEED OUR WRITING TO AI.
THIS IS A SYS WRITING ACCOUNT SO CONTENT STYLE WILL VARY
🧁 POSTING SCHEDULE: I try to write and post at least once or twice every few weeks as to not overwork myself (it's unfortunately happened in the past)! I do occasionally post more often though, but please don't expect it to continue for long— I get burnt out easily. Please be patient with me :3
NOTES --- this is a sideblog, so I can't rly moot ppl sry! Also for tf2 reblogs and just to chat w pyro (aka me) go to this blog; @ask-the-redteam-pyro // pls read my request rules before sending one! // remember do not romanticize any dark subjects I write about, I don't want to have'ta say it every time so I'm saying it here, thank you! // I nonsharing yume scout, medic, and heavy so anyone that makes me uncomfortable will be blocked! The romantic content for them that I do post I'll always try to be vague w for my comfort, pls respect my boundaries <3
🐾 NAME(Z)┆Eddie/Edward/Arthur (host), June (sfw only), Angelo, Lucius, Elektron
🫧 <𝟑┆ bugs, dirt, moss, cats, birds, mentally unstable characters, villains & monsters, drawing (digital), writing, reading (though those 2 r pretty obvious), cryptids, LGBTQIA+ media that's actually good (shout-out to Nimona), anarchy, early web stuff, the colors green and pink, videogames, playing the oregon trail (hear me out it's peak gameplay), tattoos, piercings, fish (I love flounder, not in a tasty way but in a best friends way), SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS 🩷, CupcakKe unironically (Backstage Passes is peak), the occult, t4t, tail wagging, tf2, LACEYS GAMES (I YUME JAY), ARG content (if u know of any args lmk im always looking for more) .
💐 </𝟑┆ basic shit (MAPS/Pedos, incest, homophobes/transphobes, proshitters, ppl that don't believe in COCSA, etc), unnecessarily gendering things, taxes, minimalism, generative AI, the government, MY GODDAMN SHORT TERM MEMORY LOSS .
๋ . L I N K Z . ⌗⋆⋆⋆
❝ I think the apples rotten right to the core . ❞
✧˖°|| LGBTQIA+ profile
✧˖°|| writing masterlist
.𖥔 ݁ ˖|| DNFI
✧˖°|| requesting rulez
❝ from all the things passed down, from all the apples coming before . ❞
can we have the reaction of the mercs (or rather, those of your choosing) if Reader has a nightmare and comes to them for comfort/help? I’m a sucker for nightmare comfort and I love your headcanons sm so I’d love to see your interpretation of this :)
Edward A/N: ofcc!! i recently had a bad dream so this is also somewhat self indulgent, tyy for requesting n also the kind words!! :D
ALSO im willing to do a part two to this if yall would like! feel free to give any ideas for engineers part, as hes the main one im struggling writing this for </3 (i have ideas for every1 else already)
daily reminder tf2 reqs r open!!
CW: mention of medications, canon typical violence, written accents, one immature joke (haha benis), alcohol mentioned, demoman is the only one thats strictly romantic (and heavys is leaning much towards platonic), lmk if i need to add more!
WORD COUNT: 400+
Well, it's a great thing you went to him for comfort; he never has nightmares! He's just that masculine and strong and confident, so don't even worry! He'll protect you against all those silly fears you have going on in your head.
His form of comfort is distraction, so be ready for a night full of reading comic books and causing mischief!
"Wha- now who told you I can't read, huh?! I can read fine! In fact, I bet I can read better than you!"
"Jeremy, you're holding that comic upside down."
"I know that! It was just a test."
He doesn't often sleep, and the few times he does it's with his eyes open. Not in a joking way either, he's just one of those people that can be deep in REM sleep while standing straight up with their eyes open.
His form of comfort is medications as he sees things through a scientific lens at first, but if you'd like he's open to talking you through whatever nightmares you've been having. He actually knows quite a bit about psychology!
"Vell, vhy are you scared of it?"
"Because... I dunno, it just puts so much fear in me."
"Fear is just something zhat holds you back in life, and zhe same goes in zhe dream world. I suggest you look into lucid dreaming, and harness zhe power to beat the shit out of whatever is scaring you again"
Heavy is like a big, strong, and fluffy bear - in the best way possible. Trust me, he's the right guy to go to when you can't sleep!
His form of comfort is holding you close and reading to you, his voice can be surprisingly calming and before you know it, you're back asleep. He'll make sure to only read a book that'll hopefully cause you to dream of good things, nothing with dark or serious topics. And if that means just straight-out children's stories from his childhood, well, you're too exhausted to complain.
"Они тянули, и тянули, и ещё тянули — и наконец вытянули репку (summary: end of "The Gigantic Turnip" fairytale)."
He realizes you're finally deep asleep and closes the book.
"Cпокойной ночи (sleep well), lee'tle baby."
You know what helps him sleep? Scrumpy. And if that doesn't work? Watching the stars - the sky is absolutely perfect for it when your in the middle of nowhere! Why do you look so surprised? You really thought his only interests were Scottish folklore, kicking ass, and alcohol? HAH! That's cute.
His form of comfort is spending time with each other, nothing more romantic in his mind than passing out on the rooftop past the time soldier had told them to be in their assigned quarters.
"That constellation is called thee' verpa."
"Woah really? That's cool, what's it mean?"
He suddenly bursts into lighthearted laughter.
"Can't believe you fell for that! That's just Latin for penis."
OOOO OO I HAVE ANNN IDDDDEEAAAAAAA OMG OMG OMG ITS SO CUTE OK OKKAY
so like imagine a young gn merc reader who like REALLY admires the mercs OMG OMG ITS SO CUTE to the point of like mimicing their behavior OMG OMG 🥹🥹🥹 ITS SO CUTE IN MY HEAD IMAGINE LIKE THE STUPID DORKY SMILE AND LIKE WIDE EYES EEEAAOOOWWWW SOO CUTEEUH I NEED THE HEADCANONCS FOR LIKE THE SEPRATE MERCS IF LIKE THE READER ADMIRED THEM TEHHEHEHEH AWWWWHHHH SORRY IM SO HAPPY IM SO HAPPY ITS SOOOO CUTTEEEUH TEHEHEHEHE IM GIGGLING AHHHHHHH SQUEEEEE
Edward A/N: AWWW AW THAT SOUNDS SO FREAKING CUTEE AWWW I LUV KIDS
Elektron A/N: (this is my first attempt at using a meme, please let me know how I did)
daily reminder that tf2 and dbh reqs r open!! (i might get to things slowly as ive been busy coding my game lately)
CW: kidnapping? perhaps, medical malpractice, possible cannibalism, comedic body horror, vague implied torture?, weapons, canon typical violence, written accents, gn reader, possible near death experience (with guns), lmk if i need to add more!
WORD COUNT: 700+
Thinks you're the cutest thing ever!! Aww aw awwww, the baby!!
"Can I raise them under my wing??" Scout says while cooing at the child like they're a puppy, holding them from under the armpits awkwardly.
"You're practically a child yourself! Absolutely not." Engineer doesn't even give it a thought, immediately shutting down the idea- only to take his eyes off of the younger man for a moment only to look back and he's... gone.
"Damnit."
YESS JOIN HIM IN THE MADNESS!!! Absolutely loves having a mini him!
"Now take this syringe and plunge it into his thigh, push down on the little thing on the back and it'll go in."
The enemy BLU Spy is gagged and screaming in horror as the liquid transforms him into a leech.
"Ah... I guess the formula vasn't exactly correct, oh vell! Ve'll get it right next time, kind!" He says before picking up the now terrified and transformed Spy, holding it close to his face to get a better look.
A casual silence falls over the room as he simply observes the newly created creature, before he pops it into his mouth and chews it thoughtfully. Naturally you're... confused at the sight of this.
"I was just curious, is all. Actually doesn't taste that bad, and he'll respawn anyway!"
(kind = child)
"Leetle' baby should not hurt themselves trying." Is all the large man says as he walks into the scene of the small child trying to pick up and hold his beloved gun, Sascha, in his room.
He moves deeper inside the room before opening a box, previously set aside next to the bed, revealing a toy replica of his gun.
He pretends to act like it's the same weight as his Sascha before handing it over to you, effectively convincing you that they're just as strong as him!
"Would you look at that!" He smiles as you beam up at him.
"Hold it steadier, bub." Sniper supervises as he guides your small hands holding the rifle, currently training you in one of his sniper towers.
"Steady... Steady... And shoot!" At the last second you get nervous and stumble as you hold down the trigger, causing a bullet to shoot through the roof.
Luckily no one is hurt, but instinctively he holds you protectively.
"Bloody hell! We'll.... Try again later. Much later."
You let out a displeased groan and pout after receiving this information.
Gets so scared when he sees you trying to use his sticky bombs one day.
"Don't touch that!" He worriedly exclaims, picking you up before you can get a hold of his grenade launcher, causing you to giggle mischievously.
He appreciates the fact you look up to him, but please stop trying to put him into an early grave!
Teaches you how to help with his creations, loves your curiosity as it reminds him of himself when he was a child just like you!
"Now ya' see, my sentries process information based on binary- which is ones and zeros put together to form words-"
"Like computer language" You question, watching him work on one.
"Something like that, sure." He chuckles.
"CADET PIPSQUEAK, TEN PACES TO THE..." He suddenly stops speaking to hold up both his hands in an L shape, trying to remember which way is which. "LEFT!"
You do so obediently in your training, stumbling a bit as he had previously put his helmet on you causing your vision to be obscured, but you make do.
"NOW OPEN THAT PRESENT! I COMMAND YOU!" You're confused at first before pulling up your helmet a little bit, finally seeing a messily wrapped giant giftbox.
You excitedly rip it open only to gasp as you reach for the item, it's your own rocket launcher!
"What in the samhill, why would you give a child a deadly weapon even you can't properly use?!" Engineer is horrified, Soldier does not give a single shit.
One day Pyro takes you out into the nearby town's toy store, letting you explore as long as you stay relatively close for safety.
"Who trusted a freak like you with a vulnerable child?" The cashier mutters suspiciously under her breath as you guys check out.
Long story short, today's lesson is;
Shoplifting isn't that bad, kids! As long as it's not from a small business! (tell them ol' Pyro sent you...)
LAST MINUTE ADD OOPSIES!! yall if i ever forget any1 again pls lmk as soon as possible, no pressure tho!! its unforuntely up to yall to remind me of things sometimes, since i have memory loss and i often forget things even if theyre important-
OKAY PSA DONE!! LETS GET INTO THE DAD SPY
Teaches you French first thing- gets (affectionately) tired of you just mindlessly copying him, not understanding the meanings behind the words.
"Mon Dieu, arrête de faire ça." Scoffing lightheartedly, after another day full of you following him like a duckling. He claimed to hate the clinginess, but secretly he'll always cherish these years of your innocent youth.
"Je ne veux pas!" You start grinning mischievously, knowing you're annoying him and finding it fun.
"Oh, so you have been listening to my French lectures. Maybe you're not such a rascal after all..." He ruffles your hair approvingly, smiling down at your smaller form.
You blow a raspberry, immediately making him take it back.
You've still got a lot to learn before you're on his level, but he doesn't mind teaching you a thing or two.
OOOO OO I HAVE ANNN IDDDDEEAAAAAAA OMG OMG OMG ITS SO CUTE OK OKKAY
so like imagine a young gn merc reader who like REALLY admires the mercs OMG OMG ITS SO CUTE to the point of like mimicing their behavior OMG OMG 🥹🥹🥹 ITS SO CUTE IN MY HEAD IMAGINE LIKE THE STUPID DORKY SMILE AND LIKE WIDE EYES EEEAAOOOWWWW SOO CUTEEUH I NEED THE HEADCANONCS FOR LIKE THE SEPRATE MERCS IF LIKE THE READER ADMIRED THEM TEHHEHEHEH AWWWWHHHH SORRY IM SO HAPPY IM SO HAPPY ITS SOOOO CUTTEEEUH TEHEHEHEHE IM GIGGLING AHHHHHHH SQUEEEEE
Edward A/N: AWWW AW THAT SOUNDS SO FREAKING CUTEE AWWW I LUV KIDS
Elektron A/N: (this is my first attempt at using a meme, please let me know how I did)
daily reminder that tf2 and dbh reqs r open!! (i might get to things slowly as ive been busy coding my game lately)
CW: kidnapping? perhaps, medical malpractice, possible cannibalism, comedic body horror, vague implied torture?, weapons, canon typical violence, written accents, gn reader, possible near death experience (with guns), lmk if i need to add more!
WORD COUNT: 700+
Thinks you're the cutest thing ever!! Aww aw awwww, the baby!!
"Can I raise them under my wing??" Scout says while cooing at the child like they're a puppy, holding them from under the armpits awkwardly.
"You're practically a child yourself! Absolutely not." Engineer doesn't even give it a thought, immediately shutting down the idea- only to take his eyes off of the younger man for a moment only to look back and he's... gone.
"Damnit."
YESS JOIN HIM IN THE MADNESS!!! Absolutely loves having a mini him!
"Now take this syringe and plunge it into his thigh, push down on the little thing on the back and it'll go in."
The enemy BLU Spy is gagged and screaming in horror as the liquid transforms him into a leech.
"Ah... I guess the formula vasn't exactly correct, oh vell! Ve'll get it right next time, kind!" He says before picking up the now terrified and transformed Spy, holding it close to his face to get a better look.
A casual silence falls over the room as he simply observes the newly created creature, before he pops it into his mouth and chews it thoughtfully. Naturally you're... confused at the sight of this.
"I was just curious, is all. Actually doesn't taste that bad, and he'll respawn anyway!"
(kind = child)
"Leetle' baby should not hurt themselves trying." Is all the large man says as he walks into the scene of the small child trying to pick up and hold his beloved gun, Sascha, in his room.
He moves deeper inside the room before opening a box, previously set aside next to the bed, revealing a toy replica of his gun.
He pretends to act like it's the same weight as his Sascha before handing it over to you, effectively convincing you that they're just as strong as him!
"Would you look at that!" He smiles as you beam up at him.
"Hold it steadier, bub." Sniper supervises as he guides your small hands holding the rifle, currently training you in one of his sniper towers.
"Steady... Steady... And shoot!" At the last second you get nervous and stumble as you hold down the trigger, causing a bullet to shoot through the roof.
Luckily no one is hurt, but instinctively he holds you protectively.
"Bloody hell! We'll.... Try again later. Much later."
You let out a displeased groan and pout after receiving this information.
Gets so scared when he sees you trying to use his sticky bombs one day.
"Don't touch that!" He worriedly exclaims, picking you up before you can get a hold of his grenade launcher, causing you to giggle mischievously.
He appreciates the fact you look up to him, but please stop trying to put him into an early grave!
Teaches you how to help with his creations, loves your curiosity as it reminds him of himself when he was a child just like you!
"Now ya' see, my sentries process information based on binary- which is ones and zeros put together to form words-"
"Like computer language" You question, watching him work on one.
"Something like that, sure." He chuckles.
"CADET PIPSQUEAK, TEN PACES TO THE..." He suddenly stops speaking to hold up both his hands in an L shape, trying to remember which way is which. "LEFT!"
You do so obediently in your training, stumbling a bit as he had previously put his helmet on you causing your vision to be obscured, but you make do.
"NOW OPEN THAT PRESENT! I COMMAND YOU!" You're confused at first before pulling up your helmet a little bit, finally seeing a messily wrapped giant giftbox.
You excitedly rip it open only to gasp as you reach for the item, it's your own rocket launcher!
"What in the samhill, why would you give a child a deadly weapon even you can't properly use?!" Engineer is horrified, Soldier does not give a single shit.
One day Pyro takes you out into the nearby town's toy store, letting you explore as long as you stay relatively close for safety.
"Who trusted a freak like you with a vulnerable child?" The cashier mutters suspiciously under her breath as you guys check out.
Long story short, today's lesson is;
Shoplifting isn't that bad, kids! As long as it's not from a small business! (tell them ol' Pyro sent you...)
LAST MINUTE ADD OOPSIES!! yall if i ever forget any1 again pls lmk as soon as possible, no pressure tho!! its unforuntely up to yall to remind me of things sometimes, since i have memory loss and i often forget things even if theyre important-
OKAY PSA DONE!! LETS GET INTO THE DAD SPY
Teaches you French first thing- gets (affectionately) tired of you just mindlessly copying him, not understanding the meanings behind the words.
"Mon Dieu, arrête de faire ça." Scoffing lightheartedly, after another day full of you following him like a duckling. He claimed to hate the clinginess, but secretly he'll always cherish these years of your innocent youth.
"Je ne veux pas!" You start grinning mischievously, knowing you're annoying him and finding it fun.
"Oh, so you have been listening to my French lectures. Maybe you're not such a rascal after all..." He ruffles your hair approvingly, smiling down at your smaller form.
You blow a raspberry, immediately making him take it back.
You've still got a lot to learn before you're on his level, but he doesn't mind teaching you a thing or two.
WAITER! WAITER!! MORE YAN! SNIPER PLEASE!!! I LOVE THAT PATHETIC MAN!!! 😭🙏🙏🙏❤️
Edward A/N: your meal is here, mx! *Uncovers a plater with sniper just butt naked posing on it*
Elektron A/N: what.
These r just general headcanons to help expand his character ever so slightly :P
Daily reminder that tf2 and dbh reqs r open!!
CW: discussions of kidnapping, yandere themes, stalking, you can try to run but he'll catch up, mild fan service, manipulation, mention of free use, lmk if i need to add more!!
WORD COUNT: 300+
Genuinely doesn't want to hurt you, or kidnap you, or anything of that genre. You have to believe him! He wants the best for you, and he's aware that means not being stuck with him.
Honestly is a pretty pathetic yandere all things aside, absolutely refuses to harm you or kidnap you— you try hopping states to get away? Well, he has a van, he'll just drive to where you are.
How does he know where you are at all times, down to the coordinates? "Don't worry about it, 'roo."
Is a nice guy when you cut out the degeneracy and stalking, not to excuse his actions of course. He's the type of guy to say something like;
"No ones ever liked me romantically, I'm always left pining because I'm just an awkward wanker. I know you didn't ask but I cum in under a minute, and that's without touching myself..." and then start sobbing into his hands.
At that point you just have'ta step out of the room for air because what's wrong with this guy, other than his childhood upbringing.
Now, I know what type of freaks read my stuff, and I'm in a good mood today because a fanfic I commissioned is almost done, so I'll do some fan service; Will let you do anything to him, he just wants to make you happy honestly.
Also is not a threat to others in your life. Instead of being a more traditional yandere, wanting to kill off those that take your attention away from him, he's much more likely to just... Mutter to himself and bottle his emotions up— if push comes to shove though, he's not above manipulation... Have you heard what scout's been saying behind your back lately? It's terrible stuff, really!
He's such a loser, but he's y'all's loser I suppose.../silly
would y'all possibly like my android alter (Elektron) to write for DBH / Detroit Become Human? I feel like since he's from the source (not a main character but his model is a SD600, which only appears briefly in the game but is canon) that he'd b good for writing about it!
If so then I'm not sure when it'll open, but just whenever we have the time to finish one playthrough of the game preferably (but it may be sooner if y'all like the idea enough)
They'll also get their own intro post that'll be linked on the pinned post, so y'all can know it's boundaries and personality etc ^_^
Edward: me? Medic lover of all time? Pls, u give me too much credit—
COUGHS UP THE 2K+ WRITING I COMMISSIONED ABOUT ME N HIM, THE ART I'VE COMMISSIONED, THE ART I'VE DRAWN, MY ENTIRE DISCORD ACCOUNT BEING THEMED AROUND HIM, MY ENGAGEMENT RING TO HIM IN KINMEMS, THE OTHER WRITING STUFF OF HIM I'VE COMMISSIONED, MY ETSY WISHLIST DEDICATED TO HIM N ALL MY OTHER TF2 YUMES, MY CAT WHO'S NAMED LUIGI VON STUTTGART AFTER HIM BCUS HE WAS RAISED THERE, MY MOTHER WHO KNOWS WE'RE IN LOVE AND IS SUPPORTIVE, ME LEARNING GERMAN JUST FOR HIM, THE AMOUNT OF TIME I'VE SPENT STUDYING CUT CONTENT AND CONCEPT ART AND ETC OF HIM, COUGH COUGH
dude sry ig I'm getting sick again, no idea what that was
COUGH THE FACT HE MADE ME REALIZE I SHOULD TAKE BETTER CARE OF MYSELF AND THE FACT I TOOK UP PRESERVING DEAD THINGS (WET SPECIMENS AND WAX SEALED) BCUS OF HIM
(waggles my fingers like that one peabody and sherman clip) you’d LOVE to make it slightly angsty and fluffy, wouldn’t you squidward
(pretty please :3 id LOVE some more ftm!reader stuff for my fellow readers and stuffs and sadly i dont see as much as i would hope :< But! only do it if yall feel comfy!! <D have an awesome day gangy!)
Elektron A/N: Hello! This request was very fun for Edward and I to write, mainly Edward though— I really just helped clean some things up, as well as give advice on the melancholic parts... Anyway! I hope you and many others enjoy the newest addition to the Demoman content ^_^
Edward A/N: oki so now that the nerd is outta the way w the pleasantries (/aff) I just wanna say that I'm also a transman, nonbinary ftm, and so this was exactly what I needed to make my week!!! We truly do need more content for us, it feels like every fanfic is for fem readers— which is a big reason as to why I don't take fem readers reqs, like no offense but I write for my community more than anything; women or fem presenting ppl r completely allowed to read my stuff, and I make it w them in mind, but at the end of the day I just wanna create a safe space for transmen and nonbinaries in the fanfic community (starting with TF2)!!
HOLY FUCKIN YAP ANYWAY, daily reminder tf2 reqs r open!!
CW: mild angst, one part of crack treated seriously (going back to my roots of crackfics lowk), gay panic, implied pansexual demo w masc pref, a few suggestive jokes (threesomes, cucking, & STDs but it's not explicit and it's more of a one off), polyamorous soldier & zhanna, brief mention of soldier x demo, one part sounds like petplay but it's not intended that way, alcoholism, lmk if I need to add more!!
WORD COUNT: 400+
Even before you tell him, he'll know something is up. You're never this distant with him, and this starts to cause him to worry that either you're not feeling comfortable enough or you're planning to break things off.
"Ah' mean, Ah'm not necessarily upset... Sad? Damn right, but if the bonnie wants us to start seeing others, ultimately that's their decision. Damn well doesn't fuckin' make it feel any less hurtful though, ye know what I mean?"Demoman turns to Soldier, sitting on the opposite booth in the pub and shoving fries in his mouth grotesquely.He takes a moment to stop and actually think for once, before coming to exclaim (mouth still full of food)—"IF CAPTAIN HORNSWOGGLE DOESN'T WANT TO KISS YOU, THEN I WILL TAKE IT UPON MYSELF!"
Demoman takes this as a threat considering who Soldier's married to, but at the same time they're both equally unhinged and she might just join... And then what? A threesome? He's not ready for that, he's hardly even into women! Will she just cuck him and Soldier? He's not even into either of them! Though he has heard in the past that spicing up your sex life is good... But soldier seems like the type to have an STD, just a feeling, so what if—
Suddenly he needs to talk to you desperately and clear things up, please don't ever leave him in that situation again.
Once you come out to him (either as a werewolf or a transman, it's up to you!) he'll either react in one of these ways:
If you're coming out as a werewolf;
Immediately asks if you have a big fluffy tail and like belly rubs, what about being called good boy? Or spoonfuls of peanut butter? Hell, he'll buy you a collar if that makes you happy (he just sees werewolves as dog-humans, bless his heart). Anything his handsome man wants, he gets, even if it's through illegal means!
If you're coming out as a transman;
Genuinely thinks you're so fucking brave. You did what others falsely claimed you couldn't— you grew your wings, you took flight, you reached your full potential. You don't even have to have any surgeries yet or be on Testosterone, just the fact you're making steps in being the true you in a world and time where people are so full of hate, it's amazing— you're amazing! He's so proud of his boyfriend, and he'll do anything in his power to remind you of that every day.
Either way, he loves you for you! Not your body, you're so much more than whatever physical form you take.
"Thank thee gods this means I won't have'ta shag Zhanna!" He sighs, slumping over you.
Hello! I really enjoy your work. And I was wondering if you could do some Parental figure Gn!Reader with Pyro? Idk!! I just feel so maternal towards that little dude even though they’ve like killed sooo many people.
Edward A/N: lil ol' me? :3c/silly
Daily reminder that tf2 reqs r open!!
CW: vaguely threatening pyro (I mean this is pyro we're talking about), a pyro fictkin wrote this so yes I am biased, canon typical violence, sm tooth rotting fluff omigosh, lmk if I need to add more!
WORD COUNT: 350+
Looks up to you so fucking much, no matter if you think you're not deserving of it. Like wow, you finished that exam? You're so smart, it flunked at 5th grade.
Imprints on you and you imprint on them, that's just how it works sorry not sorry. Sees you, let's say, drawing and then proceeds to sit exactly like how you sit when you draw while he draws. You see them playing in mud? Woah, suddenly you like mud too, what a coincidence!
Please sing to him, he's been conditioned to fall asleep better that way. Doesn't care if you don't have a good singing voice, in it's eyes you're perfect just the way you are!
Introduces you to all their stuffed animals and dolls! This glass doll is Bertha, she's an antique as I'm sure you can tell, and she's looking for a husband or wife in case you're interested... He won't judge, he's in love with Balloonicorn and she's a stuffed unicorn.
Shows off all the things it does. Did you see it burn that BLU mercenary to a crisp in battle today? Were you looking when he balanced that stack of books on his head like a pretty princess? What do you think about this watercolor painting of the team?
Needs your approval on most stuff, doesn't understand the concept of being an adult and being allowed to do whatever they want. Asks for your permission on if he can go hangout with Scout in town, asks for your permission to do something dangerous, asks for your permission to stay up later than normal, etc.
On the other hand you also need their permission for numerous things. You're going out with someone? But they haven't even passed the second parent test... At least let it come! It won't even interrupt, promise!
Proceeds to sabotage the date immensely, but in his defense he never pinky promised.
Genuinely sees you as their parent, always wanted one of those! Well, of the loving variety specifically. Now he has someone to tuck him into bed like before the war! You just have to promise not to leave, ever.
Can i request yandere medic with assistant nurse reader???
Edward A/N: Absolutely!! I luv writing for medic, especially the yandere pieces! This is made to be read platonically or familially, but ultimately I can't stop you guys from reading it romantically if you wish!!
Btw y'all as I'm finishing formatting this i just wanted to say (even tho ik this won't come out for a while) that I feel lowk rly sick, this is eddie from the past...
Daily reminder that tf2 reqs are open!
CW: unhealthy power dynamics, abuse of power and control, manipulation, social isolation, consensual and nonconsensual drugging (seperate ofc), infantilism (slightly? In a sadistic way), sadism, slight possibility that some of this counts as torture (in the most technical sense), mentions of starvation, one mention of lobotomies, mention of vomit / general illness, mentions of animal death / experimentation, slight objectification, gn reader, lmk if I need to add more!
WORD COUNT: 600+
First of all we have to establish something, he does not need a nurse, he's done just fine working by himself for over a decade or two— if anything it's just another way to grow closer to you and have you rely more on him!
Oh, Scout's sick? Let Medic handle it, he's more experienced after all, besides you know how the boy gets when drugged around you!
Demoman needs an examination for his liver? Well that's a shame to hear, because his last check-up wasn't too long ago actually! Are you sure he's not just... Lying to you?
Literally doesn't let you do anything unless he permits it, he considers you less of a coworker in the medical field and more of a subordinate— he envisions himself as the boss while you're more of an assistant that gets him coffee. Not even in a sexist way, he couldn't care less what gender you are, he'll realistically treat you this way no matter how you present yourself or what you identify with.
Forces you to stay up way later than is healthy so you can help him with his side projects when the rest of the base is asleep, but if you complain enough then, well, he's a nice man! He'll figure something out that works for the both of you! And if injecting you with some sort of unknown chemical concoction is what gets you to be more understanding in the morning, that's just how it has to be.
You'd like a lunch break? But you haven't even done any work today! Sure you patched up at least five different people today all by yourself, but you did it all wrong and he had to step in at the last minute. If anything, you don't deserve to eat yet. Maybe if you worked harder you'd get the privilege of taking breaks in the first place. Tsk, tsk, tsk, truly a shame!
With him you have to perform well to get the most basic of rights, even more so when you're his nurse. Besides, isn't it a nice bonding moment for him to teach you all there is to know about lobotomies? And other medical things, he supposes...
Eventually you go from being prohibited from doing practically any work, to overworking yourself to the point of sickness. "Zhere is always a price to brilliance, mausebein!"
That would be the first time he'd give you a nickname, which was sweet even though you had no idea what it meant! It would be a wholesome moment if you weren't hunched over the med bay sink, puking up everything you'd eaten that day.
"Ah, ja, zhat's completely normal! Stress often times, vhen not handled prior, can cause headaches und nausea— you'll get used to it vhen working vith me! Zhis is why I instructed you not to take zhat lunch break... Dummkopf."
If asked about the nickname he assigned you, he'll just chuckle and explain casually. Writing some final details down about an experiment gone wrong, when you tap his shoulder and ask about it. Smiling softly he just starts talking.
"Vell, directly translated into English, it just means 'mouse leg'. I thought it fit you because, just like a mouse's leg, you're very useful for numerous unorthodox purposes! I mean, I can't imagine having finished the test trials for my latest invention without one believe it or not! Small, relatively easy to acquire, what's not to love?". He turns his head to smile at you, but it's all teeth and no warmth.
He's going to sculpt you into a little mini him, at any means necessary... Not out of strictly love and care, more so for science, of course! But who says those three things can't coexist?
Hello I believe this is the first time i'm asking for request from you and the scenario I want is it could be any mercks from team fortress 2 But mainly medic for the situation, here's the scenario how do they react to seeing their partner seriously hurt or down when they find them But still alive, but very hurt, like possibly gonna be out for a couple days hurt and have to stay in bed even after waking up for a couple days or even a week. Because how hurt they are, so how would they react to that situation and what would they do
Edward A/N: I would've made this a comprehensive oneshot w medic, but because of health issues currently going on I unfortunately didn't really have the motivation and I ran outta ideas hella fast. Sorry about that!! ^_^"
This is only for Medic, but bcus of my writing boundaries (pinned post), I made this vague enough to be read in any relationship status
Daily reminder that tf2 reqs r open!!
CW: ties into the yandere!medic x nurse!reader oneshot ever so slightly, implied canon typical violence, self starvation, medical themes, fear of death, infantilism (in a loving way), gn reader, lmk if I need to add more!
WORD COUNT: 300+
He'll blame himself so, so, so incredibly much. The logical area of his brain knows it's not his fault, but the emotional part fills him with guilt. He won't waste any time crying or fussing over you until he's sure you're stabilized
Will refuse to sleep, eat, or drink until you get betters. Days are spent monitoring your vitals and refusing to let others visit in case they "do something that can harm you", and nights are spent wishing to hold you close to his chest but holding back in fear that he'd cause more damage.
Gets way more irritable than usual, glowering at literally everyone for no reason in particular, other than taking his attention away from you— Why the fuck did Scout call for him like he was going to do something about his lousy sprained ankle, does he know what's worse than that? Being on your deathbed, he has it so easy.
Now this, this is the part you're going to loathe. He'll baby you so fucking much, and I mean SO MUCH, you're literally spoonfed because "Vhat if mein mausi chokes? Are you seriously trying to neglect your health, again?!"
You're also put on bed rest even once you're fully healed, "Just in case!" my ass. He just wants more time to coddle you, hell if he had it his way you'd be completely decommissioned.
As annoying as it is, he'll go back to normal within a week or two of your recovery, just give him some time. Or don't, it's honestly up to you, just know that he's doing everything out of his awkward and foreboding method of love.
Hmmm I wonder about the pipeline from this to yandere... Man, let's just not worry about it, I'm sure this won't turn into anything unhealthy, like some sort of toxic attachment because we all know how Medic can get, he wouldn't do that.
CW: me ranting about how disgusting AO3 fanfics have become (that's a huge warning in itself), and also a lil bit of the difference between "anti-censorship" and just being a terrible person
Stop writing absolutely vile fanfics w me in the center of it all. Why am I scrolling through my tag on Archive Of Our Own and in order to find smth I wanna read I first have'ta scroll past a fic that's like "pyro wants to play paddy cake, sniper wants a different cake"— I check the tags and it turned out to just be straight lolicon. They aged me down. To make loli. Real thing I saw.
Another real example to drive the point home; fanfic where the entire plot is just porn about medic taking me when I'm dissociated and unable to fight back, amazing! That's exactly what I've been waiting for! Thank you! Woah, and what's that? The ending will hint at a sequel? That's absolutely amazing, good job!/sarc/neg
Atp just go back to babying my entire character as a whole, I'd rather go back to being the "silly uwu bean" of the team in fanon than whatever is going on currently bcus wtaf
"I thought u were anti-censorship" yeah in like a political way jackass, in a "don't censor the Epstein files" way, not in a "I wanna write about rape and incest and pedophilia" way. I don't care if it's coping, it's not even healthy in the first place, but if you're going to make that shit don't fuckin publish it for other weirdos to see and get off on
(Btw I thought I'd include the ao3 author tag bcus why not, I mean I do write on AO3 after all COUGH COUGH @notroadkiller COUGH)
CW: mentions of my community being compared to nazis + sorta warning to all tf2 community members
Just saw some1 who I luved the tf2 art of post about how they hate SPECIFICALLY nonsharing yumeshippers and fictkins and that they're "probably a proshipper" and with "full shade", mannnn I wonder if that was targeted in any way.. (I've interacted w them numerous times and keep finding myself not following them when I did infact follow them) and then compared these ppl on the same lvl as the dudebros in the community that r literal Nazis and sexists (their words I'm not trying to exaggerate)... I genuinely can't make ts up just let ppl live how they wanna (I will drop the name if y'all would like but pls don't harass them bcus then I'll just b digging myself into a deeper hole)
@/TF2 writing community, pls post more stuff I'm begging I'll literally pay u (infact I have been paying ppl to write for tf2, the amount of money I've spent on writing commissions for me n my tf2 yumes is insane, I had 200 USD to spend and I spent most of that already bcus I'm lowk terrible w money)
I scroll on the tf2 x reader tag and it's either stuff I've read 2 years ago (not to say it's not peak but I've reread them sm times) or, gods forbid, my own freaking content. *distressed Drew Gooden voice* I don't wanna read my own fanfiction, I already know what's going to happen!!
Ohhhh mann (typo intended), itd SUCK such balls if some1 were to request I write forcemasc w my beloved heavy, or hey maybe even some other character, that's be a SHITTY ass situation... my askbox is open, oops... I sure hope no one uses that to their advantage.... ftm forcemasc, what a weird thing right? Who gets actual gender euphoria from that, weirdos.... Not me, I'd never, I'm normal.. u gotta believe me.....
Hello! C-can I please have a request about super-powerd!Y/n x mercs please.Ome that can able to hold or control all elemental power please .a-and can you make it long? Your writing skills are so good and I want to read more (looks around nervously and runs away)
Edward A/N: hii hii heyoo!! :3 *speaks softly to u like ur a wounded forest critter*
I tried to make it decently long but I ran out of ideas for what to include, I hope u and others still enjoy tho!! Also me n Angelo were goofing off, I apologize anon </3
ALSO ALSO, ANOTHER MCSM FAN SPOTTED?? THAT SHIT WAS MY CHILDHOOD WASSUPP
daily reminder that tf2 reqs r open!!
CW: plans for world domination, sexual topics briefly joked about, mentions of tornados & earthquakes, nonconsensual experimentation, canon typical violence, patriotic propaganda, lmk if I need to add more!
Word count: 1,100+
THINKS YOU'RE SO FREAKING COOL, LIKE HOLY SHIT!! You're not messing with him, are you? Because if he finds out you're just trying to make him look stupid he'll never trust you again—
You promptly using your elemental powers to prove your sincereness is all it takes for him to jump into the air and running around excitedly. Wait til' his older brothers find out the youngest is friends with a freaking superhero- person- thingy.
Really hopes you haven't told the others yet, he's always wanted to be in the loop about something secret! What do you mean last time the team told him a secret he immediately blew it?! In his defense the secret was stupid anyway.
Kinda just nods at you when you tell him and then says "Ja, I knew from day one— vhen I took your blood sample for ze respawn machine. Und don't look so surprised, I'm ze smartest man alive."
Sorry to break the news to you but he's already known for a long time, he was just curious how long it'd take you to come clean about it. You really thought all those monthly samples of your DNA were just routine?
Is probably planning to make a homunculus with your dead skin cells and pyro's hair shavings— pyro agreed to the experiment but Medic didn't ask you for permission because he knew you'd probably say something about "the moral and ethical concerns of creating a completely new and unique sub species of human".
Stares at you in amazement for a long moment before gathering his composure and apologizing for gawking, he's just really impressed and he's happy you trust him with this information.
Is the most chill out of them all, mainly because superpowers or not he was raised to not make big deals of things and always be respectful to others. Sure he now knows this crucial information, but he tries to distract himself by reading into fantasy books about the powers you have— then asking you for a response on which parts are the most accurate.
Will genuinely hold this information to his grave, BLU team couldn't waterboard this information out of him (mainly because he's used to waterboarding but that's a topic for another time).
thinks it's absolutely phenomenal! You mean to tell him that little old you can do all that? Mind if he asks you to demonstrate for research? He finds it so interesting and is amazed overall.
Likes taking notes on how your powers work and how it affects your body, if he notices you using too much energy then he'll promptly tell you to stop— at least take a break from all that superpower stuff for a day, okay? You might be superhuman, but you're still his partner.
Actually might be turned on by this because it means you're stronger than him supposedly, thus it's easier to manhandle him and— WHAT, I apologize y'all Angelo got in the booth again.
is just like "ah, alright then". He's tracked down the loch ness monster, his lost eye turns sentient every Halloween, and you still think he's phased by anything? Maybe when he first joined the team, but not nowadays.
Is the most chill about it out of the mercenaries because he's either too wasted to comprehend your powers as anything other than an acid trip (ask him if he does acid and he'll deny it but between you and me...) or completely sober and he's just proud to have you as his partner.
"Yeah sure yer' lassie can give amazing blowjobs, but my bonnie can blow 10 times better— and by blow I mean blow winds up ta' 200 MPH, they can create EF5 tornados. This is a serious threat, hide yer' wife n'' kids."
He already thought you were ethereal before, but now he doesn't even know what to do with himself. "Can ya' just step on me at this point or somethin' 'roo? WHAT, I'm kiddin', I'm kiddin'...". To this day we still don't know if he was really kidding.
Woah what's happening, I think I'm... *Growls and my eyes turn red, I'm suddenly hunched over and I start turning into my true form— a werewolf. My fangs start to show, my dog ears slick back, and I grow an adorable fluffy tail but that's besides the point.* I... I'M GOING FERAL!!! WORSHIP KI— *gets shot 28 times with tranquilizer darts by the feds, they must contain me so they send me to the SCP foundation where I'm locked up with SCP-049, we fall in love and it gets me pregnant through the power of mpreg and dark magic with an entire litter of puppies*
Hey, so um, what the fuck was that? Let's all just pretend that was never said, ignore everything you just heard right now and don't comment on it, you'll feed into Edward's roleplaying addiction and intent to push the word count.
Probably forgets that you have superpowers often, a mix between his forgetfulness and his disbelief to the information.
Tries to play it cool, like he doesn't care and isn't phased, but in reality he's kissing the floor you walk on. In traditional areas of france religion is taken very seriously, so this is both blasphemous and enchanting to him.
You want something? He's already gotten it set aside, how convenient! Someone overhears about your powers? They were never seen again, isn't it unfortunate? Wanting to overthrow humankind and become god among men? Just in case you were wondering he's not necessarily opposed to being your right hand.
Man it'd sure be a shame if his badass partner suddenly had the powers get to their head and turned evil and hated all mortals... But at the same, more of you for him.
He already knew! Not in a medic way though, much more in a "I KNEW FROM THE SECOND I SAW YOU THAT YOU WERE A PURE BLOODED AMERICAN FOUNDING FATHER" way or something (I don't know that's just what he said).
Uses your powers to his advantage, sorry not sorry. "THERE'S A SNACK STUCK IN THE VENDING MACHINE, CADET CUPCAKE CAN YOU BEND THE FABRIC OF THE UNIVERSE AND GET IT UNSTUCK?!" and you have to explain to him that your powers are only elemental, not... Whatever he's expecting.
Has an "ooooh" moment, then just dumbly rephrases it to "CADET CUPCAKE CAN YOU START AN EARTHQUAKE TO SHAKE IT OUT OF THE MACHINE?!". This is important to him, the fate of America may rest on your shoulders.
Elemental as in you can like move water mid air like cartoon characters or elemental as in you can create new life forms? Can you create unicorns and dragons? Are you and mother nature friends?
Looks at you in awe for the rest of time, I don't make the rules (I do). Every day there's something new he finds out about you or your powers and they're stoked each time!
