Alright, sit down folks because I’m gonna tell you a little story about shipping: what it is, and what it is not.
Shipping is something that happens when you could see characters in someone else’s work together in a relationship. It originally referred to the act of making some kind of work in which you explored that dynamic. It dates back at least to the sixties with the original Star Trek fandom, at least in its current form.
The biggest part of shipping is that you have to be aware of the fact that your own ideas, opinions, and views on someone else’s creation are just that: ideas, opinions, and views. It is not your creation. It does not belong to you.
You do not “deserve” anything for happening to enjoy a particular idea, opinion, or view about someone else’s work. No matter how many years you’ve had that idea. No matter how many works you’ve created. No matter how many friends you have that share the idea. That particular perspective is called entitlement.
Yes, entitlement, the same thing that we’re all trying to fight against, the same thing that hurts POC, LGBTQ+ persons, women, disabled and chronically ill persons, all of the groups that are marginalized — we’re marginalized because of this kind of mindset.
Entitlement says, “I’ve been following this author/artist for X amount of time, I deserve to have more content.” Even when creators have a real life to balance, have their own set of ideas, have breaks and move on to other interests.
Entitlement says, “I’ve been friends with this person for X amount of time. I’ve done so many things for them. I deserve so much back, they had better even things out soon.” Expectation is not a friendship, that’s unhealthy and can lead to emotional abuse.
Entitlement says, “I’ve been interested in this person for X amount of time. I deserve to have sex with them, haven’t I waited long enough?” Which by the way, is a common rationalization for rape.
Just because you are invested in something does not mean you can bend it to your will.
Twenty years from now chances are it won’t really matter much if Destiel becomes canon. There’s a lot of gay relationships on mainstream TV, it’ll make a splash on Buzzfeed for a couple of years, but it wouldn’t be groundbreaking.
What will matter is the way you’ve carried yourself, your reactions and your attitudes and how you’ve chosen to develop your interactions with people and concepts around you. What will matter is this — when you look at your attitude to a passion of yours, a shared passion that you care deeply about, are you expressing that in a healthy manner?
Entitlement sneaks up and bites you where you’re most passionate. Your favorite things, the relationships most important to you. I’m not saying that wanting Destiel to be canon is a bad thing in itself. I’m saying the attitude that pervades the fandom — this kind of thinking — is destructive and can spread into other parts of your life so easily. Besides —
You want a world where Destiel is canon? It already exists.
We’ve already created that world, in innumerable creations: fan fictions, art, songs, videos, podcasts, vine compilations. We have the alternate universe. We don’t need to rely on canon for our idea to be real — it already is. We’ve done it, everyone, we can pack it up and go home now.
What the CW and the writers do with the show is up to them. We can criticize it, be upset with it, demand for it to be different. It will still be their show.
Or we could respect them as creators in their own right just as we respect the creators of our fandom.
Because yes, that is too much to ask because we are not entitled to anything for having an idea we really like or screaming really loudly about said idea.
