where did you go

nuka. 23, big bro to vitani and kovu but don't ask me to be the responsible one. i'm a professional designated driver which is a huge sacrifice because i love the alcohol so please give me five stars, kids. the fun roomie.

[nukaokoro]

oliver-oaken​:

Heck yeah, man! You can’t let a good drink go to waste, dude!

Man, I wish the people that pulledl me over agreed with you.

[nukaokoro]

If somebody tips their Carpyt driver with beer, they're legally allowed to drink it on the job, right?

[nukaokoro]

TEXT 😼 NOOKIE

Sookie: FLOOFY IS A GOOD STRONG NAME! AND YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE HER!!! BECAUSE IT'S A CAT, IT'S A HYGENE ISSUE! HE WASN'T EVEN BEING RUDE TO YOU! QUIT IT! I literally do not deserve this! Stop it!

Nuka: SO FAR I DO NOT LOVE THE CAT! THE CAT IS EVIL AND YOU CAN'T TELL ME IT'S NOT, IT SUCKS! And YES, Richie WAS BEING RUDE TO ME BY SIDING WITH YOU ON THE CAT THING WHEN HE KNOWS HOW MUCH IT WOULD HURT ME. I have to throw you out the window now! It's the only way you'll know how much the ugly cat hurts me!

[nukaokoro]

text 💬 nuvie

Evie: This is one of the reasons I like you so much! Cuddling and kissing you happens to be a favorite pastime of mine. And I'd be more than willing to hand them out to you especially if you need it. Yes, I am aware. We have enough time that we could try to go shopping too but I want you to be comfortable so we can work with what we have.

Evie: That sounds completely insane, but I think it would be just a little fun to watch. And I would never turn down a romantic date with you.

Nuka: You're really good at both of those things, what a coincidence! And I probably will need them but even if I didn't, I'd still want them. You're really awesome, you know that? When we first started doing this thing, I totally thought that if we became like official, you'd want me to become like a Mr. Buttondown Shirt kind of guy and you haven't been like that at all.

Nuka: It WOULD be completely insane! It'd also probably be pretty short, at least. It could be fun, we'd have like popcorn and sodas and shit and watch like it was a movie.

[nukaokoro]

text 💬 nuvie

Evie: oh my goodness, thank you! I was hoping you would say that 🥰 I know it's not really you're kind of thing, so I can host at my and Jess' apartment. If she threatens you, just try not to think about it! I would say don't take it too seriously but she's a woman of her word and I understand how she could share others. She's fierce. But I'll be there to comfort you! As for the t-shirt, could I pre-approve t-shirts from your wardrobe?

Evie: I like you too! So much! Oh, I don't know about that. Our friends may compete for that title. I mean I love them until my last sequin but they can be a little too much sometimes or not enough... they're special.

Nuka: Hey, I'm with you, so whatever's your kind of thing can be my thing too, or at least enough anyway. Besides, I'd do just about anything to get to hang out with you, you know that. Especially if I get some comfort ❤️ which I'm sure I'll need lol. And okay, cool! Fair warning but eh there's not much to choose from my clothes, but I'm sure you've noticed that by now.

Nuka: Let's lock your crew and my room in a room and see who comes out on top. We can have a romantic ass date while they do that, it'd be fun!

[nukaokoro]

text 💬 nuvie

Evie: okay so, what do you say to having a dinner party this weekend to meet my friends? it'd be gigi and jess and probably doug since those two are dating. i would also say mal but dinner parties don't really seem like her thing so that might be weird. you can meet her and the gang another time.

Nuka: A dinner party, huh? Sounds kinda fancy but I guess for you I'd be able to get through it. And Gigi's already threatened me with bodily harm if me or any of the other guys let anything happen to Sookie while she lived with us so if she threatens me for YOU, then I'm ready and will probably only cry a little bit! I'm in! Any chance I could get away with wearing a t-shirt to this thing though?

Nuka: Also, whenever you're down for me to meet Mal and the gang, I'm there too. I like you, a lot. And besides, it's not like your friends could be worse than mine.

[nukaokoro]

TEXT 👀 NUKAWN

Dawn: Really? My timing couldn't be more excellent then! I WON'T get snippy with you. You're going to be living out my dreams, I promise!

Nuka: Why don't you live them out with me? Throwing shit is fun and makes the rage simmer down!

[nukaokoro]

TEXT 👀 NUKAWN

Dawn: Yes. That's EXACTLY why I want you to be around.

Nuka: FINALLY. I've needed to throw things at people all goddamn week. Just remember you said that and don't get all snippy with me for it. People take it back all the time.

[nukaokoro]

TEXT 👀 NUKAWN

Dawn: I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.

Nuka: You want ME to be around annoying people? Okay, but you can't get mad at me if I throw stuff at them.

[nukaokoro]

TEXT 😼 NOOKIE

Sookie: YOU HATE MOST THINGS! BUT MAYBE YOU CAN LEARN TO LOVE ANIMALS! OR AT LEAST JUST FLOOFY! WE CAN TEACH HER HOW TO DO THOSE THINGS! Except drink mixing because that would be gross. SHE’S SO LOVABLE, YOU MIGHT! NO HE DOESN’T DONT BE RUDE! Yes you doooooo! AND NO WE WONT BECAUSE I’LL BE DEAD!!

Nuka: I REFUSE! THE FACT THAT YOU GOT FLOOFY WITHOUT EVEN WARNING ME AND YOU NAMED IT SOMETHING AS STUPID AS FLOOFY LETS ME KNOW WITH 100% CERTAINTY THAT I'LL NEVER LIKE THAT CAT! HOW would that be gross?! It'd be useful at least. HE WAS RUDE TO ME, I'M GOING TO BE RUDE TO HIM BACK! I'll toss you out of a one-story window then! You'll just be a little banged up but that's it.

[nukaokoro]

TEXT 😼 NOOKIE

Sookie: I'M NOT A MENACE! I'M WONDERFUL AND LOVING AND I GOT US A CAT THAT ONLY YOU HATE. AND YOU HATE EVERYTHING SO IT'S NOT EVEN A REAL VIOLATION! But you drive other people in it!!!! IT IS VERY EXCITING AND YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE HER! DON'T BE MEAN TO RICHIE BECAUSE HE SEES THE VALUE IN A GOOD PET! SAY GOOD NIGHT TO HIM! It is now! Don't throw me out a window! I don't deserve this violence!

Nuka: I DON'T HATE EVERYTHING! I LIKE BEER! I LIKE WEARING UNDERWEAR STRAIGHT OUT OF THE DRYER! I LIKE WHEN HOT GIRLS PRETEND I'M INTERESTING! BUT I HATE ANIMALS AND NOW I HAVE TO LIVE WITH ONE?! I'VE ONLY BARELY GOT USED TO LIVING WITH YOU!!! And? CAN SHE DO TRICKS? DOES SHE MAKE MONEY? CAN SHE MIX A MEAN DRINK? BECAUSE OTHERWISE NO, I WON'T LOVE HER! AND NOPE, RICHIE DESERVES LIKE A WEEK OF ME IGNORING HIM RIGHT BEFORE BEDTIME, AND I HOPE HE HAS EVIL DREAMS! And I don't deserve a CAT, so after you've been tossed out a window, maybe we'll be closer to even!

[nukaokoro]

TEXT 😼 NOOKIE

Sookie: WHY WOULD I LIE TO YOU, NUKA!!! THEY DO AND I'M GOING TO HAVE TO SHOW YOU WHEN WE GET YOUR CAR CLEANED BECAUSE WE ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO DO THAT NOW. Why is your CAR where you choose to leave your depression nest, can't it be your room like normal people? YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE EXCITED BECAUSE IT'S AN EXCITING THING! AND I DIDN'T EVEN SNEAK HER, RICHIE CAME WITH ME AND HE'S EVEN MORE EXCITED ABOUT HER THAN I AM! I choose neither!!!

Nuka: I DON'T KNOW, BECAUSE YOU'RE A MENACE! EXHIBIT A -- THE CAT IN OUR DAMN APARTMENT! BUT FINE, I'LL LET YOU TRY AND PROVE ME WRONG! What do you mean WHY?! I spend a lot of time in my car, just like I do in my room, it has to be a nest too! IT'S NOT EXCITING! IT'S UNWANTED! AND TELL RICHIE HE'S A TRAITOR AND I HATE HIM AND HE'S NOT GETTING A GOOD NIGHT FROM ME TODAY. That's not a choice! I'll throw you then. As soon as I get home, I'm picking you up and BAM, out the window you go!

[nukaokoro]

TEXT 😼 NOOKIE

Sookie: YOU HAVEN'T HEARD OF A LOT OF THINGS THAT YOU REALLY SHOULD KNOW ABOUT! THEY DO EXIST! You let people EAT in your car and you still never clean it out? How do you even exist!? I'M NOT KIDDING AND STOP BEING SO AGGRESSIVE! Don't throw me out a window, Floofy likes it!!

Nuka: YOU'RE SUCH A LIAR! And yeah, of cOURSE I let people eat in my car, I'm not an animal! I exist DEPRESSED, that's how! HOW ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO BE WHEN YOU SNUCK A LIVING UGLY THING INTO OUR HOUSE?! It's either you or Floofy out the window, YOUR CHOICE.

[nukaokoro]

TEXT 😼 NOOKIE

Sookie: EVERYONE CLEANS THEIR CARS! AND THERE ARE SUCH THINGS AS CAR VACUUMS! What is your Karpet rating if you NEVER clean it out? Um...in my defense...she is..very floofy...and when I said it out loud she let out SUCH a cute and happy meow!

Nuka: PFT NO WAY, IF THERE WAS I WOULD'VE HEARD OF THAT BY NOW AND I HAVEN'T. I BET YOU FEEL DUMB! It's not as high as it could be but I let my passengers pick their own music if they want and there's always snacks in the back so I could be doing worse! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, SOOK?! I'll let you pick which window you wanna be thrown out of!

[nukaokoro]

TEXT 😼 NOOKIE

Sookie: You drive PROFESSIONALLY, Nuka. Do you never clean your own car? You can't clean up dry sticky beer with a vacuum! And what's a car manicure? I DID! AND I DID!! MAYBE, BUT IF I BRUSH HER ENOUGH IT'LL MINIMIZE THE DAMAGE!

Nuka: NO, I don't clean my car! Who cleans their cars?! THAT WAS SARCASM, SOOKIE, THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS A CAR VACUUM OR A CAR MANICURE! BECAUSE THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS CLEANING A CAR! Ugh. What's the cat's name? I swear if you brought an animal into our house and named it something stupid like Floofy, I'll throw you out a window.

[nukaokoro]

TEXT 😼 NOOKIE

Sookie: oh yikes! That's awful! Do you need help cleaning out your car? Also back to my point!! It's not a prank! SHE'S WHITE AND FLUFFY AND THE CUTEST LITTLE FLOOF!

Nuka: Good one, Sookie! Because people TOTALLY clean their cars! Let's just take my car to the nearest car vacuum person and let them do their thing! Maybe after that we can take her to a car spa and give her a manicure. DID YOU SERIOUSLY GET A CAT?! AND A WHITE FLUFFY ONE AT THAT?! SHE'S GOING TO SHED EVERYWHERE, YOU MANIAC.

[nukaokoro]

TEXT 😼 NOOKIE

Sookie: CAT! CAT! CAT! CAT! Cat! WE HAVE A CAT!!!!

Nuka: If this is a prank, I'm NOT IN THE MOOD! I've had a very long, hard day and the beers I bought for the place fell and broke all over the inside of my car and all my customers complained about how sticky it was LIKE MY LIFE ISN'T WAY WORSE BECAUSE OF THE MONEY LOST ON THE BEERS.