✧𝓽𝓸𝓻𝓶𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓮𝓭 𝓼𝓸𝓾𝓵 ✧ @nyctophilus - Tumblr Blog

remanence-of-love

I want to speak to someone about what's on my mind without judging.

I want to feel valued.

I want to hear words that are pure.

I want to be heard.

fool me once shame on me, fool me twice….

My independence

scares me sometimes.

How easily

I learned to carry things alone.

How quickly

I stopped expecting help.

I became strong enough

to need no one,

and sometimes

I wonder

if that strength

cost me

something softer.

- - - - - - - -

04202026

She carries the pregnancy. She survives giving birth. She heals through postpartum, bleeds every month, feeds a child from her own body, and still shows up every single day like none of it is happening.

And somehow.. you think her money belongs in your equation?

Let’s be honest about what’s actually going on.

A woman doesn’t spend on herself for luxury. She spends to recover. Pregnancy strips the body down to its foundation. Getting back to herself physically, mentally, emotionally..isn’t self-indulgence, it’s survival. And if no one is standing in the gap for her, she has to fund her own healing and keep the household together.

So why are you reaching into the one thing holding her up?

Her income is not a shared resource you’re entitled to negotiate. It’s hers. Fully. Without explanation.

If she chooses to contribute.. that’s love. That’s generosity. Honor it.

But providing for the family you helped create? That was never her debt to pay. That’s a role you agreed to when you showed up.

She is already doing more than enough.

The question that should keep you up at night isn’t whether she’s doing her part.

It’s whether you’re doing yours.

— Daphnee Jewel M.

#HerMoneyHerChoice #PostpartumTruths #MomLife #ProviderMindset #RealMotherhood #HealingMama #Respect #AccountabilityMatters #fblifestyle #HealthyRelationship #lifestylechallenge

She carries the pregnancy. She survives giving birth. She heals through postpartum, bleeds every month, feeds a child from her own body, and still shows up every single day like none of it is happening.

And somehow.. you think her money belongs in your equation?

Let’s be honest about what’s actually going on.

A woman doesn’t spend on herself for luxury. She spends to recover. Pregnancy strips the body down to its foundation. Getting back to herself physically, mentally, emotionally..isn’t self-indulgence, it’s survival. And if no one is standing in the gap for her, she has to fund her own healing and keep the household together.

So why are you reaching into the one thing holding her up?

Her income is not a shared resource you’re entitled to negotiate. It’s hers. Fully. Without explanation.

If she chooses to contribute.. that’s love. That’s generosity. Honor it.

But providing for the family you helped create? That was never her debt to pay. That’s a role you agreed to when you showed up.

She is already doing more than enough.

The question that should keep you up at night isn’t whether she’s doing her part.

It’s whether you’re doing yours.

✍🏻— Daphnee Jewel M.

#momlife

#fblifestyles

i hope all.

I feel stuck in a cycle of dishonesty.

Do we co-parent?

No.

He puts himself first.

I put our kids first.

While he chooses comfort, I choose stability.

While he rests, I build.

While he disappears, I show up — every single day.

People love to say “it takes two,”

but no one talks about what happens when one walks away

and the other becomes both parents in one body.

I’m not looking for praise.

I’m fighting for consistency — for my children.

So if you see me exhausted but still standing,

that isn’t weakness.

That’s parental strength.

Single parents aren’t bitter.

We’re busy doing the work twice.

And if you’re raising kids alone while the other parent raises excuses —

welcome to the strongest club nobody ever planned to join. 💯

You better not go back to the man who had you talking to God in tears. 🙏

The man who made you beg for peace instead of feeling loved.

The man who pushed you to your knees—not in gratitude, but in pain.

God didn’t pull you out of that season just for you to walk back into the same suffering.

He heard every silent cry.

Every prayer whispered through shaking hands.

Every breakdown you thought no one noticed.

Sometimes, God removes people not to punish you—but to protect you.

What broke you was never meant to keep you.

And what cost you your peace was never love.

Walking away wasn’t weakness.

It was obedience.

It was survival.

It was God choosing you when you were too tired to choose yourself.

Don’t romanticize what almost destroyed you.

Peace is the confirmation.

take your time. take it slow. embrace what you're going through 🥀✨

i’ve learned that people can ruin something before it even happens — sometimes with doubt, sometimes with opinions i didn’t ask for. so this time, i’m choosing to keep things to myself while they’re still fragile, while they're still becoming. not out of secrecy, but out of protection.

i will let my plans grow in silence, away from noise and interference, trusting that when the time comes, the result will speak for itself.

Men that put women in survival mode do not deserve gentle women. A woman's softness is a privilege, not a right. And if you put her in a position where she has to protect herself constantly, where she's always on edge, where she can't let her guard down you've lost the privilege of experiencing her gentleness. When a man is inconsistent, emotionally unavailable, or unreliable, he puts a woman in survival mode. She can't relax. She can't be vulnerable. She can't be soft. She has to be strategic, guarded, and protective of her peace because she can't trust him to handle her heart with care.

When a man is controlling, dismissive, or disrespectful, he puts a woman in survival mode. She has to walk on eggshells. She has to manage his emotions. She has to defend herself constantly. There's no space for gentleness when you're in fight-or-flight mode.And then these same men have the audacity to complain: "Why are you so difficult?" "Why are you so guarded?" "Why can't you just be sweet?"Because you made her this way. You created an environment where being soft meant getting hurt. Where being gentle meant being taken advantage of. Where being vulnerable meant being dismissed.A woman's gentleness blooms in safety. In consistency. In respect. In love that doesn't hurt her. If you can't provide that, you don't get to complain when she hardens to protect herself. Men who put women in survival mode don't deserve gentle women. They deserve exactly what they created.

There are times where I just feel so lost and miserable. I feel so tired whenever I wake-up, and no matter what I do, I just can't be happy. No matter how much I try to cheer myself up, I still feel like drowning in sadness. Sometimes, I ask myself what went wrong. What happened to myself? I don't understand what I feel. I just know that there's something off.

I try to forget about this misery. Every night I pray for my silent battles to end soon. Or at least I have more courage to face the world every day. But sometimes, I feel so lost that I don't even know what to do with my life anymore. It's so frustrating to think that I am not okay and I don't know what to do to make myself feel better. Sometimes, I just want to give myself a hug too.

— Shiori X

Art by: giselle.dekel (IG)

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