So, I wanted to write a blurb on my sexual health because I have noticed a wide range in the age of my readers/followers/rebloggers (anywhere from 15 to 40+).
Last week, I noticed some discomfort in the bathroom and brushed it off initially as maybe being dehydrated. I drink mostly water/seltzer/coffee, but whatever, it's possible. The next morning, I saw something that was really disconcerting, but I will save you all the details, suffice it to say that I knew that something was wrong and it wasn't dehydration or even a UTI.
Since I broke up with my boyfriend of three years, I have been meeting up with different guys, all of whom I ask when the last time they were tested and given a STI-free bill of health. I do not discriminate regarding what we're going to be doing: oral or anal, with me topping or bottoming. For any penetration, I always insist on using a condom and if my partner disagrees in any way, that is the end of our meeting. So far, all men have been receptive to my questions about their personal health as well as "playing safe only." Outside of abstinence, it is about as safe as I think I can be, all things considered.
Back to the present: after going over all that I was experiencing, I looked my symptoms up on the NYC health page and was able to match my symptoms 100% to a basic STI infection. I hadn't been able to get to a clinic yet, but considering all the factors, I felt the most responsible thing to do was contact my recent partners and tell them I was going in to get tested/treated for an STI, and they should consider doing the same since they could be asymptomatic.
I was expecting a lot of negativity, but that wasn't the case. Yes, it was embarrassing for me to tell recent men that I think I'm symptomatic, but aside from that, each guy was reasonable, one going as far as texting me the location of a late night testing facility because my work schedule made it impossible to reach one during normal hours. The majority have scheduled a time to get tested, with a few ascribing that they "are clean." To them, I say "good luck and good-bye."
I enjoy sex, I am not living a monogamous lifestyle, and I make sure to get tested at least every 6 months. For the men, women, and trans out there, gay/lesbian/bi/hetero, regardless of age: Get Tested. It's the responsible thing to do. It's a simple process, it's anonymous, and almost every city offers free or, at least, low-cost options for HIV and STI screenings. There is no shame in sex, only in misrepresenting your health by choosing to not be proactive and considerate. Don't let anyone slut-shame you. Mistakes happen, and I don't even consider this episode in my life a mistake. You can only be so careful with a world so vast. The only 100% sure method is abstinence. After that, you need to take responsibility for your actions and take part in the real world, because our actions have consequences for ourselves and those in our lives.
blakekathryn
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