Obviously @obviouslyobvio-blog - Tumblr Blog

This is terrifying. (photo by agent_hank_schrader)

Today, I fucked up... by saving my husband

I once thought my husband was falling out of bed, so I grabbed him tenderly, cuddled into him and sweetly said “It’s okay darling, I’ve got you…”

That’s what half-asleep-me thought I was doing, anyway. In reality, I threw my palm onto his face like the Facehugger alien and screamed incoherently into his ear.

Also, he wasn’t falling out of bed.

today-ifuckedup

Today, I fucked up... by throwing an orange at a homeless man

So today I went to the store to get some oranges as I’m trying to eat healthier and needed some fruit in my life. On my way out I notice a homeless man sitting by the wall and thought I’d be generous and throw him an orange, so with a weak underarm throw the orange goes flying through the air and hits him square in the face, I quickly find out he’s blind after a lot of apologizing and offer to peel the orange for him.

today-ifuckedup

Today, I fucked up... by going to a fancy carwash and accidentally kidnapping a Mexican dude.

This morning I decided to got to one of those fancy carwash places where they have about 10 people cleaning and drying your car after it gets out of the automatic wash. I drive a large pickup truck, a 4 door Nissan Titan and I keep the rear seats up so my dog has more room. So after they were done drying the truck they waved me over and I started to drive away, I got about a half mile down the road and I see someone in the rear of the cab, still drying the inside of the windows. It scared the shit out of me and I screamed, then the guy screamed and I ended up swerving on the Highway and cut off a car in the next lane. There happened to be a police officer behind me who saw it all and turned on his lights and pulled me over. The good news was the cop believed me, because the truck was still dripping and the Mexican dude had a spray bottle and rag. The police officer gave me a written warning and had a good laugh. I tried to give the cleaner a ride back to the car wash and he just said to me “No mas” and turned and quickly walked away.

tastefullyoffensive

(photo by dolphinatelyfishy)

just-shower-thoughts

“That’s nice dear.” Is grandma’s way of saying “Cool story bro.”

*falls on face*

someone: did u just fall omg are u ok?

me: nah i just attacked the floor.

someone: with ur face?

me: well yea its my ultimate attack.

#floor #facehurt #face #ouch #chats

just-shower-thoughts

Jaywalking is a misdemeanor occasionally punishable by death.

just-shower-thoughts

How many people slipped on banana peels for it to become a thing?

roblox-builds

Dominique Palace by MyNameIsjosue

This specific build surfaced about a week ago and it is quite incredible but has received few visits. This must change as Dominique Palace by MyNameIsjosue is an extremely well-made mansion. The detail on this build is spectacular and it is massive in scale. It appears that this build is not quite finished but it looks fantastic so far. Due to Roblox not having good anti-alias, the pictures of this build don’t make it look like anything special. In order to get the full sense of scale and detail, visit it yourself, it’d be worth your time as it is amazing. The build also includes very nice cars that you can drive around. Beware: if your computer isn’t the best, don’t try driving the cars. Hopefully MyNameIsjosue continues to work on this build if there is still work to be done or moves onto a new project to wow us with again.