So… I haven’t been posting or writing much and I wasn’t sure I was going to say much about why, but I’ve decided to just share. The reason I’ve been so absent aside from mental health is because of TikTok. I fell into Booktok and then Masktok. This past February, I took a deep dive into Masktok and actually became a Masktok creator. I’m still learning to balance it with real life, but I’m hoping now that my summer is clearing up that I’ll able to start writing again.
I will likely be overhauling the Vigilante Shit story just because I’m not as in love with the outline as I used to be. The posted chapters will stay but I’m adjusting the future chapters. But none of the stories are dead nor is my account. I will be back, I promise.
Hi 😊 how are you? I’ve just re-read Your Terms Not Mine and I’m still in love with it, I was wondering did you end up making a part three I’m afraid I missed it, if not that’s completely okay! I’ll just keep waiting patiently if you do decide to make one 😊
Anyway have a nice day or night!
Hello! I’m okay, swamped with life 😅
I have not, but I still plan to. Once hockey season is done and life slows down, I plan to try and jump back into writing again.
SURPRISE! I'm starting to feel a lot better. I've felt better for awhile, but just didn't have the heart quite yet to get back into it. Ice storms and standing my ground has brought me back to you guys. Enjoy!
Tag list: @fishingirl12 @gillybear17 @sublimepenguinpeach-blog @gills-lounge @emmafitzzz @redfieldfx @baby19sthings @marauderssmut
Masterpage
The pogues, Sarah and Rafe, have come back to the Maybank house with you. No one wants to leave you just yet. You glance at Rafe as he presses a sanitized Q-tip to the cut below your eye. “Flashbacks, huh?” You speak softly to him. Your hands tremble as you touch his arms.
“A little,” he responds, eyes flicking to yours. “Angel, I’m not leaving this time.”
You smile weakly and quickly blink away the tears.
“Were you going to tell me about tonight if it hadn’t gone down this path?”
You chew the inside of the bottom of your lip. “Probably not.”
He frowns, swiping liquid bandage across the cut before moving to the other wound on your chin. “I would’ve seen the bruises and cuts.”
“I know,” you whisper and squeeze his bicep. “But… you didn’t need to risk getting hurt too.”
His eyes narrow.
“I’m just saying,” you murmur. “Barry and you have a history of violence because of me. And Topper is your best friend.”
“Was,” he corrects without hesitation.
“Right,” you murmur as he finishes, and then you cave. You lean into his chest, your head tucked under his chin. “I hate what has happened. All of it. Topper and his vile actions. The video.” You exhale. “If that hadn’t happened, so much of my life wouldn’t be so shadowed, and you wouldn’t have spiraled.”
“I didn’t spiral,” he mutters, pulling you closer.
You touch his jaw with your fingers. Your tone is gentle but knowing. “You spiraled.”
He chuckles, and his lips ghost your temple. “Maybe.”
You smile weakly and close your eyes. “I hate him. Both of them.”
“Me too.”
A few moments pass before you pull away and turn your back to him. “Unzip me, please?” You whisper. “I want to get out of this dress. It’s already going to cost me a month of my tips to pay for it.”
He frowns but does as you ask. “I’ll pay for it.”
“No,” you murmur as you stand and kick out the skirt so you can walk before heading to your closet. “This is my fault.”
He levels you with a look, and you look down.
“It is.”
“It isn’t.”
You huff and meet his gaze again. That argument would never end, so you choose to change the topic. “Turn around?” You ask as you pull out a pair of shorts and an oversized t-shirt. He does as you ask, and you quickly change before moving back to your bed and him. “Do you need to borrow something?” You ask him. Your fingers card through his hair, something you always used to do.
“Maybe in a minute,” he says while bringing your hand down to his face and kissing your fingertips. Something he always used to do. “Come here.” His voice is low as he pulls you into his chest again. You settle in his lap, head tucked back under his chin.
“I’m awful,” you voice your darker thoughts. “The guy I’m dating is in the ER after a car crash, and I’m sitting in the arms of my ex-boyfriend because his ex-best friend and my other ex-boyfriend couldn’t be decent people.”
He huffs and kisses your forehead. “You’re not awful. Just hurt and needing comfort.” He runs his fingers through your hair. “And it’s not like I’m letting you go anytime soon. You’re stuck with me, Maybank.”
You laugh softly and rub his sides. “You’re a good guy when you want to be, Cameron.”
“Just for you.”
-----
You stir awake, blinking away the sleep, and shift slightly before freezing as you are sandwiched between Rafe and Sarah. You lift your head to see John B asleep on Sarah’s other side. Pope passed out on the couch, and JJ and Kiara tucked together near the couch above your head. You shift and groan softly, throat aching. Your entire body aches. You begin to sit up, but Rafe is there, guiding you back down gently. Your eyes lock with his, and you see concern in his eyes. You start to open your mouth, but he cuts you off.
“Stay, rest,” he murmurs, kissing your forehead. “I’ll get you some water.”
You bob your head yes and shift as Sarah wakes and brushes your hair back behind your ear. You look at her, frowning a little. You hate how raw and exposed you feel after last night. You hate that you are not at the hospital with Mav, holding his hand, but you know his parents will not let you anywhere near him anytime soon.
“It’s okay,” she tries to soothe you. She can see the storm inside of you.
But you shake your head, tears in your eyes. “It’s not.”
A hard knock on the screen door of the house catches your attention, and everyone starts to stir from their various sleeping positions around the family room. JJ gets up and stumbles to the door, opening it. Reese steps inside, and you scramble to your feet, eyes wide.
“Hi,” he murmurs, looking anywhere but directly at you. “Y/n, I’m sorry.”
You realize without him even speaking the exact words what has happened, and it shatters your insides. Tears blur your vision, and your eyes burn. “No,” you whisper, voice breaking. “No.”
Your knees give out, and you collapse to the ground, sobbing. No one says a word or moves, all catching on.
“No!” You sob louder, trembling as you hug yourself.
“I’m sorry,” Reese murmurs. “I’ll get you the details when I can.”
John B steps forward and pats Reese on the shoulder before squeezing him. “How’s Ben and Nat?”
“Not good,” Reese murmurs, tears in his eyes too. He swallows and clears his throat.
“When?” JJ asks.
“About 4 am this morning. I got the call just before five,” Reese explains. “Nat and Ben are at my house. Y/n?”
You look up, hot tears rolling down your cheeks. Nothing is spoken between you, it is an understanding. He nods once, and then he is gone, the screen door slamming shut behind him. Arms wrap around you, and Rafe holds you as you cry into his shoulder. Mav is gone.
Time passes, and the others begin to move about, but you do not. You stay in the safe warmth of Rafe’s arms. You cry and mourn the boy you have been spending your summer with. An empty hole settles inside of you, you feel the worst sickening turmoil you have ever felt.
“Shh… shh…” Rafe rocks you, stroking your hair.
Sarah sits with John B and looks at you while JJ paces. Kie and Pope are trying to get breakfast together in the kitchen.
“What do we do?” JJ asks, his blue eyes flashing to you with worry. “Do… do we leave?”
“What?” John B looks up at him in confusion.
JJ shrugs. “Couldn’t she get blamed?”
“No,” Sarah pipes up. “No, if anyone is going down for this, it’s Topper.”
Snorting sarcastically, venom fills your voice as you speak. “Topper will get off scot-free, we all know it.”
Silence floods the room because it is true. Topper won’t face so much as a slap on the wrist for this.
You lift your head and look at Rafe. “He’s the reason we broke up.” You are ready to be Topper’s downfall. And you know Rafe will hold him accountable for what he has done to you all these years. “Back when we were together, he videotaped us having sex and said it was you. He held the tape over my head and lied to me about how you felt about me. He manipulated us into breaking up and pushing me into Barry’s arms.”
“What?!” JJ and Sarah both snap as Rafe stares at you. His eyes go cold, and his grip tightens.
You sniffle and wipe your cheeks, getting angry now. “He admitted it last night. He confessed, and that is why he was trying to choke me. He doesn’t want us together. Says I’m not good enough for you. I’m a distraction from who you truly are.”
Rafe’s jaw clenches, and you look down. He is angry like you need him to be.
“Topper needs to be taken down,” you say, tone final. “I’ll do it by myself if I have to.”
“No, you won’t,” Rafe says, looking at the others. “I know you all don’t like me, fine. But this isn’t about me.”
“Agreed,” your little brother states firmly. The other pogues all agree.
“What do we do?” John B asks, pulling Sarah into his arms.
You lift your head and look at them all with an angry and teary look. “We get revenge.”
-----
A few hours later, you sit with Nat, head on her shoulder and hand in hers, while everyone sits around Reese’s house talking.
Rafe brings you a bowl of fruit. “You need to eat.”
You take it and tuck it on your lap, but you do not touch it yet.
“Y/n,” JJ and Reese both look at you. “Eat.”
You nod and huff. “I was planning on it. I’m just… I feel sick,” you murmur and look down at the fruit. You look back up at Reese. “You saw him, right? Before he… before he passed?”
Reese nods. “He wasn’t talking, but he was awake.”
Tears pool in your eyes again, and you look back at your fruit. “I wish I could’ve seen him.” It hurts your heart that you have been banned from being there with him in his last moments. You wipe your cheeks as Natalie wraps her arms around you. Her chin is tucked on your shoulder.
“You’ll be at the service and funeral. I don’t care what his mother says.” She murmurs. “You’ll come as our friend.”
You nod and exhale, closing your eyes before hugging her back.
“We’ll make it right,” she murmurs to you, and you nod, sniffling. “I don’t care if Topper has a grandfather for a judge or not,” her tone turns angry.
“Me either,” you agree and look at the others then. Everyone meets your gaze head-on, with anger and something else in their eyes. Four out of ten of you grew up with lesser means and had never been a part of the kook world, but it seemed you all agreed that money would not protect Topper this time.
Rafe moves to sit next to you after Natalie releases you. His knuckles brush your cheek. “We should get you home to rest. Maybe some food and a shower.”
No one utters a word, they watch. This side of Rafe was new for everyone but you. He had always taken care of you and protected you when you dated him as a teenager.
So… you may have noticed I’ve been missing for a bit. It’s been a rough few weeks. The guy I was seeing decided he didn’t want to be with me anymore, I went to Charleston and got COVID, my bio fam has basically decided I have absolutely zero worth to them, and my semester is hard schoolwork wise. But I’m hoping to straighten it out soon. I’m healing. Please be patient with me.
Tag list: @fishingirl12 @gillybear17 @sublimepenguinpeach-blog @gills-lounge @emmafitzzz @redfieldfx @baby19sthings
Masterpage
A night of pretty dresses, full of dancing in the arms of your boyfriend, and enjoying time with your friends. That is how your night started. So much laughter, several drinks snuck behind the adults' backs, and sweet kisses made your head spin. Every fiber you radiated happiness for those moments of bliss. And then destruction had found its way into your evening and ruined your night.
“Where is she?!” JJ’s voice breaks you out of your thoughts, and you leave the nest of comfort amongst the lounge chairs you have with Reese, Natalie, and Ben.
“JJ!” You push through the serving trolleys, half broken down tables, and groups of lingering Island Club staff to see your brother and his friends rushing through the Island Club in a panic to find. “It wasn’t me,” you whisper as they turn to converge on you. The press of five warm bodies against you has fresh tears gathering in your eyes. You hug them back. A momentary rush of relief floods through you. “I’m okay. It wasn’t me.”
“What the hell happened?” Kiara asks, squeezing JJ’s arm as he clings to you even though everyone else has released you. “We saw the wreck.”
You tighten your arms around JJ, realizing he has thought the worst. JJ thought he had lost you. Once he backs off, you see the tears in his eyes, and your hands tighten around the skirt of your dress. The delicate lace is torn and bloody in places all over the skirt and bodice. The right strap is torn from the front of the dress and hangs down your back now. A ruined beautiful dress that you had borrowed and would now need to pay for. Tears blur your vision as you cry harder all over again despite the throb of your headache.
“He wouldn’t let me in the car and… and I… oh JJ!” You sink into his arms and let your little brother hold you up as you sob. “I told him not to. I told him not to get caught up in this bullshit.” You shake your head, clinging to the shreds of your senses. “He didn’t listen. And he got in a fight, and then Topper pushed him into racing a-and...”
“Where is Topper now?”
You shake your head at Sarah’s question before glancing at Ben, who is nursing his bloody knuckles, as he mumbles something under his breath that no one quite catches.
“Probably getting drunk or high with your brother,” Reese mutters, coming closer to your group. “I’m going to check in and see if there is any news, okay?” He looks at you before glancing at Natalie, who is sitting curled up in a lounge chair with his jacket on her shoulders. “Nat’s worried about you. We all are.”
You shake your head, guilt filling you. “We should worry about Mav, not me.”
“Go sit with her,” Kiara encourages, squeezing your arm. “Let’s all go sit together.”
No one says it, but you are pale and trembling. They are worried you will pass out at any given second if you stay on your feet much longer.
She leads the way as you all make your way back to the seating section. You sit beside Natalie, dropping your hand into hers and squeezing. You lean into her side and exhale a harsh breath.
“My parents are checking in,” Kiara mutters before going to the edge of the room.
The staff continues to clean up the tables around you. Feeling eyes on you, you look up and spy JJ watching you. Worry is written plainly across his face while he studies you. You attempt a sad smile, but fresh tears spring up again, so you tear your gaze away.
“What happened to your hand?” John B asks Ben while pulling ice out of a nearby ice bucket that had probably housed champagne a few hours ago. You all watch him put it in a linen napkin before offering it to Ben.
“Barry.”
“Barry?” JJ whisps around to look at you in alarm.
You exhale, slumping back into the chair. “He showed up. How do you think my dress is ruined?”
“What the fuck?”
You frown at your brother before looking at your hands. “Yep.”
“Topper and Barry in one night?” Pope whispers, and you frown, reaching up to wipe a tear.
"It's fine. Ben and Mav stopped him."
You shudder as you think about Barry's body against yours. His hands were greedy and harsh as he tore at your skirt. Squeezing your eyes shut, you try not to relive the moment again.
The sound of hurried footsteps has you all turning, and you hope Reese has a useful update on Mav. His parents were not forthcoming with you, blaming you for tonight's accident. And you know you are not welcome at the hospital. Not after the way his parents looked at you at the scene of the crash. You shudder again. This time the image of Mav’s mangled car flashing through your mind. The screams, your screams, echo in your mind as Natalie held you while Reese and Ben pulled him from the burning car. The faint image of Topper fleeing in the black smoke surfaces.
“Rafe! What are you doing here?” Sarah is off the lounge chair and crossing the room to her brother as you refocus on reality.
Your gaze finds him, and he seems to visibly relax until his focus shifts to your torn gown and shaking hands. Sarah pushes at his chest, trying to remove him from the main room, but he fights back and slips past her with ease.
“No!” JJ is the next line of defense with Pope right behind him.
“Guys,” you whisper as Natalie’s hand tightens on yours, and Ben leans over to pull her attention to him. She is fragile, much more fragile than you, and tonight has already taken such a toll on her. “Guys.” You try again, but no one is paying attention to you as the pogues try to force Rafe to leave. “JJ!”
He turns to you with wide eyes.
“Stop it, please.” You push yourself out of the chair and between the pogues and Rafe. “He’s not going to hurt me. Not right now.”
“If you do,” JJ begins to threaten him, but you level him with a look, and he fades out.
After they back off, you turn to Rafe. “Top isn’t here. None of your friends are.”
“I didn’t come for him,” he states, shrugging out of his suit jacket and arranging it around your shoulders. You frown, looking down at the powder blue jacket. “What happened, Angel? Talk to me.”
“Barry and Topper both showed their true colors.” You murmur, coldness spreading through you. “It’s really bad, Rafe. Mav didn’t look good.”
Rafe frowns, his fingers ghosting across your cheek and down to your neck to examine the bruising handprint that is already forming there. “Barry?”
You nod once before closing your eyes.
“Did he cause Mav’s accident?”
“That was all Topper.”
"Were you in the car? Do you need to see a doctor?"
"No," you murmur, trying hard not to lean into him and let him comfort you like he always has. "No, Mav would not let me in the car. I tried."
Rafe frowns, brushing his thumb across your chin. “Damn it, Angel.”
“I know,” you mumble. It had been a stupid thing to try and do. Both of you glance at the others, aware it is not just you two alone. “Reese went to get us an update.”
Rafe’s lips press into a thin line, but he is looking at his sister instead of you. Sarah frowns at him before shaking her head and looking away. She never could understand how you got through to him.
“Why did you come here?” You whisper, pulling his attention back to you. "If not for Topper."
“For you.”
“Rafe…”
“Just let me be here for you, Angel. Barry could come back.”
“He would be stupid to try it.”
“He’s done plenty of stupid things.”
You wince, agreeing with Rafe before glancing as the chairs scrap across the floor.
“You have some nerve!” Kiara and Natalie both say, springing out of their chairs. Rafe turns, allowing you to get a clear view of Topper as he walks down the hallway. A fuming Reese is right behind him. Topper looks like the picture of health, untouched and still in his Midsummer's suit.
“I come in peace. I only want to talk.”
Rafe’s hand grips your hip as he positions himself better between Topper and you. You do not miss it and squeeze his forearm in appreciation while JJ and John B push themselves to be in front of you and by association Rafe. JJ glances at Rafe’s hand on you but says nothing since Topper is the current threat.
“What could you possibly have to say?” You glare at the blond kook. “You’ve done enough!”
No longer do you tremble, instead, your back straightens, and your shoulders push back as you try to keep from tearing Topper limb from limb. Hostile feelings brewing inside of you.
Topper lifts his hands before glancing as Reese shoulders past him. He stumbles from the harsh impact of Reese's shoulder against his but quickly rights himself while Reese takes his place beside Natalie and Ben.
“I want to talk about what happened. Make it right.” Topper offers, his voice softening as he turns his attention back to you. “I need to speak to you, y/n. Alone. Try and explain.”
“The fuck you are!” JJ yells, fury erupting from him.
“Jay…” You murmur and try to reach for your brother, but Rafe bars you with a shake of his head.
“No one wants you here,” Sarah states, arms crossing over her chest, scowling at her ex-boyfriend. She stands firm beside you. “You need to go.”
“I need to talk to y/n.”
“You will never speak to her,” JJ spits, and John B. grabs his shoulder as JJ attempts to lunge after Topper.
“Mav is in the hospital because of you.” Natalie's shaking voice breaks the haze of rage and hateful glares.
“I didn’t make him race.”
“No, but you baited him,” you cut in. “Anything you have to say to me, you can say to everyone else.”
“I can’t,” Topper says, trying his best to look innocent. “Please, y/n, I need to talk to you.”
You sigh, and he grins while everyone else glares at him. “Five minutes. You get five minutes.”
Rafe’s hand tightens, but you disregard him and gently step away from his touch.
“If I’m not back in five minutes, come find me,” you whisper, leaning into him to peck his cheek. You start to remove his jacket, but he stops you, tugging it back around you firmly.
“Keep it.”
You miss the look Topper throws at your brother and friends as you push out the door and down onto the lawn. You can hear him behind you, so you do not hesitate as you storm down the boardwalk and out onto the beach.
“Why do you need to speak to me alone?” You move away from him before turning to stare at him. You trust Topper as far as you can throw him. “You have one hell of a nerve to show up here and ask to talk to me.”
Topper smirks at you. The innocent boy façade drops in a flash as he relishes in your stormy attitude. “It wasn’t my fault. I didn’t make him race me.”
“Are you an idiot, Topper?” You glare at him. “It is your fault. You are such an asshole!”
“Ladies shouldn’t curse, you know.” He tries to toy with you.
“Get fucked!”
Topper blinks in surprise, before shaking his head with a laugh. “Fucking pogues.”
“Just say you hate us,” You glare at him. “Just say you hate anyone who isn’t exactly like you.”
He smirks, looking at his loafers. “You got me.”
“Yeah?” You feel the rage building inside of you over his classist bullshit. “Or is it because you really just envy us?”
He scoffs, cocking an eyebrow at you.
You smirk, stuffing your hands into Rafe’s jacket pockets. “Because we have control over our lives. We don’t have mommy and daddy breathing down our necks.”
Topper closes the distance between you, and you stumble back, nearly toppling back into a dune. “You think your so fucking smart, don’t you y/n?” His breath is hot and smells like alcohol as he presses down on you. “But you don’t have control, do you?” He continues to crowd you. His hand moves to swipe your hair back behind your ear. You shudder at the feel of his touch on you. “Not with our little secret, huh? I have the control because I have the video.”
Your blood turns to ice instantly because you know exactly what he is referencing.
His sick laughter over enjoying your hesitation at his threat has the words unsticking from your throat as the icy wrath explodes inside you. “You have it?!”
“I’ve always had it, Angel.”
A mixture of anger and confusion washes through you. “Why you? Why would Rafe give it to you?”
Topper grins, flashing those perfect white teeth.
Realization dawns, and your mouth drops open before you whisper your realization. “It was always you.”
Topper’s grin fades as he sees the puzzle pieces fall into place for you. But you do not give him a chance as you shove his chest harshly. He stumbles back a few steps from your surprising push of energy. You launch after him. Rafe’s suit jacket crumples against the sand as it falls off your shoulders.
“It was you!” You glare at him and begin to stalk forward. He backs up, hands raising in innocence. “You bastard!” You spit at him. “You lying bastard!”
“Hey now,” Topper smirks, enjoying you get so worked up. “I never said it wasn’t.”
“Yes, you fucking did!” You scream and try to hit him, but he dodges your strike. “Rafe never videotaped us! You did, you are a fucking pervert!” You shove at his chest again, and he falls back against the boardwalk leading back to the Island Club. His eyes widen in surprise and fear. “You sick and dirty bastard!” You push your hands against your stomach to stop the violent roll of sickness washing over you. “So help you when I tell him,” You whisper with a shake of your head as you take a weak step back, nearly stumbling as everything you went through because of Topper weighs down you. “No one on Kildare will be able to save you. Not even your Mommy.”
You try to push past him to find Rafe so that you can tell him everything. It makes so much sense now why Rafe never thought you were over, and you did. Because Topper had lied, and he had killed your relationship without ever involving Rafe in its death.
Topper is quicker when he grabs your calf and causes you to stumble and crash down against the boardwalk. Your body hits the weathered boards harshly, and the sand bites into your skin. You cough, the air rushing back into your lungs.
“You aren’t good enough for him!” He yells, dragging you back down to him even as you try to crawl away. You struggle, shoving at him as he climbs over you, but his fingers find their way around your throat. He tightens his grip. “You never will be! And he can’t see that, but I can!”
“Topper,” you gasp, pushing at his chest but failing to get him off. “Top!”
“He was doing fine until you came back! You just had to come back!” Topper squeezes harder, and your lungs and chest scream in pain. "I thought Mav would be enough to drive Rafe away, but he isn't. We both know Rafe gets what he wants. And he wants you, even now."
The edges around your vision darkening. Your nails bite at Topper's forearm, breaking skin as you claw at him, but he only presses harder against your throat. The back of your legs and heels sting as you kick against the boardwalk.
“You don’t deserve to be a part of our world!” He glares down at you, and you can see years of hatred in his eyes.
You try to drive your knee up between his legs but fail as you gasp and claw at his forearm. “Topper!”
Then his weight is gone, and you gasp, rolling to your side. Your forehead presses to the boardwalk as you try to fill your lungs with air and hold back the bile rising in your throat. Moments later, a hand grips your shoulder, and you yelp, twisting away.
“It’s me. Hey! It’s me!” Rafe’s face is a mask of worry and anger. His hand trembles as he cups your face. His forehead falls against yours. “What the fuck is going on?”
“I don’t know,” you sob and grip his shoulders. Your breath hitches in your throat as he pulls you closer to him. Your body pressed against his chest. His lips ghost across your temple. Twice tonight, you have been manhandled and nearly killed because of jealousy and men wanting to have their way no matter who they hurt. You shiver, pushing yourself against Rafe's warmth while Topper lies motionless on the ground a few inches away.
“What the hell?!” Sarah yells when the pogues and kooks all rush down the boardwalk. Eyes wide in shock and confusion painting their faces.
“I’m so sorry,” you whisper, burying your face in Rafe’s chest. “All this time… It was Topper.”
I’m in Charleston for a couple days, but I promise once I’m back home that I’ll begin wrapping up old stories so the new ones can be posted! Thanks for sticking with me!
Tag list: @fishingirl12 @gillybear17 @sublimepenguinpeach-blog @gills-lounge @emmafitzzz @redfieldfx @baby19sthings
Masterpage
A hiss escapes you as Rafe presses an alcohol-soaked cotton swab to the cut below your eye. His lips pressed into a tight, thin line. He is not impressed with your current state. The bruises marring your jaw and neck had made him see red when he first got to you. The aftereffects of Luke's drunken stupor are displayed across your body for all the world to see. But it had saved JJ, and that was all that mattered to you. Working to save your 13-year-old brother from your raging alcoholic of a father because your mom could not stick around to do it any longer has been your mission for months now.
Your nails bite into his thigh as you try to keep from pulling away again or losing yourself in self-pitying sabotage. The grumpy exterior had shattered when he pulled you out of your bedroom window and into the safety of his dad’s Range Rover. His anger had spewed over the rim, and it had taken every plea and promise to keep him from going into the house and destroying the shadow of a man passed out inside.
“Almost done,” he soothes, his other hand cupping the back of your head to keep you still. His touch is firm, but not hateful. "You're doing good, Baby."
You nod, fighting back a fresh round of tears. Your voice cracks as you whisper to him. “I love you.”
He swallows, blue eyes flicking up to yours. “I love you more, Angel.”
You blink away the tears as he removes the bloodied swab to toss it in his bathroom trashcan. The eerie quiet of Tanneyhill presses down on you. Without asking or hesitating, you climb into his lap, fitting yourself against the warmth of his body.
“You saved me.”
Rafe stays silent, nuzzling his face against your hair, inhaling the remnants of your lavender-scented shampoo as he traces his thumb over the small cut running over your knee. It is bandaged and clean, thanks to him.
You tip your head back to look at him, and he leans down. His lips find yours in a toe-curling kiss before moving to ghost along the bruise decorating your jaw.
“I wanted to kill him. I still do.”
You frown, hooking your hands around his neck before pecking his lips. “He’s not worth it.”
Rafe huffs because he knows you are right. It would mean giving up his future with you, all the promises you had made in the dark, quiet of his bedroom after he had patched you up each time. He kisses you again, ignoring the roaring ache in his heart to snuff out the bad guy for you. “Stay until for a few days?”
"He'll disappear in a week or so." You nod, closing your eyes and melting against him. "Yes, I'll stay."
You jerk awake, body damp with sweat. The wind has picked up, and the sun has crept over the horizon but been drowned out by storm clouds, bathing your bedroom in muted gray and faint blues. Another day, another chance to tell Mav what you did with Rafe in that bathroom.
Your stomach grumbles from hunger while also flipping from betrayal. Nausea washes over you in a wave, and you grumble, flopping back into your pillows. Your head already pounding as you relive that moment in the bathroom. The hot, hungry press of Rafe’s lips lingers even now. Squeezing your eyes shut, you try to focus on something else. Hurricanes, Luke, Barry, or anything not to feel Rafe’s hands on your skin, his body pressed against yours, or the sounds of him panting as he ravished you on that bathroom counter.
You hear the faint sound of JJ’s alarm. A huff escapes you as your duties to be a great sister and amazing guardian tug at you. Pulling yourself out of bed, you quickly get dressed, wash your face, and brush your teeth before stumbling into the kitchen. Prepping breakfast for the both of you and making sure he went off to work on time takes over, drowning out the tug of war inside of you.
A summer thunderstorm has rolled in as you prep a yogurt bowl. Your gaze focuses on the backyard as sheets of rain come down one after another. A stray kickball rolls across the grass in the wind. You blink back the memory that tugs at you, but it does not work. And instead, you disappear into the deep sea of your past again.
Tears burn your eyes, and the rain pelts you hard, the harsh cold of the sheets of rain making your skin feel rawer and more exposed than you thought possible.
“Why?!” Rafe yells, his bottle of expensive scotch shattering against the pavement after he hurls it away in anger. You flinch, drawing in on yourself.
“You know why!”
Rafe glares at you, hands trembling in anger. “You are a slut, y/n! You hear me, a slut!”
Hatred explodes inside your chest, hands balling tightly into fists. “You sound like Topper; you know that right?!”
“I can still smell him on you! That disgusting smell of him and what you do with him.”
You roll your eyes, shaking your head at him. “They why bring me here, huh? Why not leave me there in his bed?!”
“Because you deserve better than him!”
You laugh, a cold icy feeling shooting through your veins, freezing you on the inside too. "I do not need to be rescued anymore, Cameron!"
Rafe stares at you. He looks like he wants to tear your limbs off your body, but he does not and instead turns away. Your lip is already busted from a hard slap earlier in the day. A slap that had you seeking a way to numb out and not feel anything. A slap that had driven you back into the bed of someone you loathed but needed.
You close your eyes, feeling the icy winter rain envelope you deeper and deeper into her freezing arms. It helps erase the feel of Barry’s demanding hands touching you, tracing your curves, and groaning in your ear.
“Why?” Rafe asks, his voice low, deadly, as his fingers grip your chin. The warmth from his touch makes you shiver all over. “Why are you doing this to us?”
You close your eyes, sinking into his chest, burying your face in his soaked polo shirt. You wish with all your might it could be Rafe who rescues you every time Luke tries to destroy you, but he has ruined that. Now, instead of comfort, you look for numbness. Your body and mind demand it. Rafe’s chest tightens as he practically holds you together once again.
“Stay until the rain goes away?”
You close your eyes and press yourself closer to him with a whispered yes. One last time.
“Flower delivery!” John B announces loudly, snapping you out of your trip down memory lane just as the screen door slams shut. Mav’s cheeks are tinged red as he carries a wildflower bouquet to you with John B bouncing happily behind him and JJ rushing out of his bedroom to check out the delivery.
You can see the 'little brother' wheels turning in both JJ's and John B’s heads. A shared smirk of idiocy between them over Mav bringing you flowers.
“No!” You point your finger at them. “Don’t even think about making some idiotic jokes right now. It’s been a long day, and you are both going to be late for work if you do not get out the door right now.”
Mav chuckles, enjoying your motherly speech, before pulling you against his chest and pressing his lips to your forehead. “I have a question that comes along with these flowers.”
“Oh?” John B grins, wiggling his eyebrows. You glare at him before turning your attention to Mav.
“I’m listening.”
He grins, his eyes dancing with amusement as he strokes his thumb over your bottom lip. “Will you go to Midsummer with me?”
JJ and John B both gasps dramatically, and you have to fight back a laugh as they clutch to one another. Mav’s chest rumbles with a laugh.
You do not know why, but as soon as you say yes and he lifts you off your feet, you see Rafe. His boyish grin at sixteen and a gold pendant with a single daisy inscribed on it. The exact same question came from him.
“Kiara and Sarah are going to love this,” JJ mutters, shouldering his backpack.
Your eyebrows scrunch down in confusion.
“Dress shopping!” John B. winks before following JJ out the door to the Twinkie. The screen door slams shut, and you turn to Mav with a smile.
“Dress shopping!” He teases before admiring you as you go to put the flowers into a mason jar with water. You glance at him before turning back to the flowers. The betrayal sets back in, burning you up on the inside as you think about how to tell him. It would ruin Midsummer’s if you let Rafe tell him first. The jerk likely lying in wait to do just that and destroy yet another shred of happiness.
So… update time. I took an unexpected break because I started seeing someone shortly after I got back from NYC. Well… that ended today, so I will be back hopefully this weekend. Who needs men? Not me when I have Rafe and JJ. Lol all jokes aside I’m excited to dive back in before my next trip that is coming up super quickly.
A needy whine escapes you while you are staring down at him, and he grins up at you in satisfaction. Your body rocking on top of his. Thighs shaking and a stickiness gathering between your legs as you ride him. The room smells heavy with sex, and the sounds from the oversized leather chair underneath him fill the small, cramped space. It is dusty and has seen better days, but it is private and far away from the party.
“Just like that, pretty girl,” Rafe encourages, hands clamped around your hips, guiding you to move faster. His lips pull back, revealing perfect teeth when he hisses from the small jerking stutter your hips make as you draw closer. You are so close, the world spinning as you stare down at your boyfriend. “Fuck, Princess, you are beautiful.”
You groan, nails biting into the leather behind his head as you grow closer and closer to coming undone. “Oh, Rafe!” You gasp, chest heaving as the band of pleasure snaps inside of you.
He continues to guide you, encouraging you to ride it out, and you cry louder until you are calling out his name. Your body trembling as he grunts, spilling inside of you. His face buries in your breasts, peppering your skin with kisses after you collapse into him.
Moments later, you kiss him hard, pouring your desperation into the kiss, and he meets you in equal measure. Still, inside of you, he groans as your body barrels through aftershocks, still wrapped around him in a tight grip.
“Remind me to steal you away more,” he says, his voice low and thick as he strokes your hair back from your face. His thumb brushes your swollen bottom lip. “My perfect girl.”
Your eyes flutter shut as he shifts, and the emptiness takes hold. You slowly slide from him, testing your legs as he rights himself and stands. He gathers you in his arms, ignoring the mixed orgasm running down your thigh as he kisses you in a searing kiss.
“Fuck, I’d be lost without you, y/n.”
You smile, combing your fingers through his mussed hair. “Promise?”
“Promise.”
He releases you to grab a dinner napkin from a neat pile before coming back to you. He drops to his knees and gently runs it up your leg, cleaning you before pressing his mouth to the space above your knee.
“Such a good girl.”
The air in your chest catches, and you almost beg him to take you all over again, but your time is limited. The Wilson’s anniversary party is still in full swing yards away.
He straightens, brushing his fingers between your legs in an attempt to elicit a gasp from your sensitivity, and you give him just that. “Do you forgive me, Baby?”
You nod, nuzzling into his chest. His absence at your family brunch earlier in the day is forgotten as your body and mind swim in post-sex bliss.
“Then let me walk you back.”
“My panties…” You immediately start to look for them, but he catches your hand and tugs you back to his side. His free hand fishes in his pocket before he produces the flimsy lace material.
“I’m keeping them.”
“Rafe… they are my newest pair.”
“And my favorite.”
You frown, but he stares at you knowing that you will give in to him and let him keep them. You nod, sighing as he proudly tucks them back into his pocket.
“I’ll buy you new ones. Although,” he starts while leading you out of the storage closet. “I don’t think they can get any more revealing.”
“I wore them because of you,” you mutter, leaning in to kiss him once more. “I know your preference.”
He grins, pecking your lips before spinning you in a small circle.
“Our parents are probably looking for us.”
He agrees with a simple nod of his head before you both walk down the hall back to the party hand in hand. Both of you are oblivious to watchful eyes staring at you from behind a corner.
"Spin me around the floor?" You ask softly, squeezing your fingers around his.
He frowns, looking ahead. You know the words that are about to come out of his mouth.
"You have to go."
He nods, still staring straight ahead. It is one of his tells. He can never look you in the eye when he has to leave you.
"You promised..."
He stops, tugging you to be between him and the wall outside of the double ballroom doors. "I know I promised," he murmurs, lips brushing your forehead. "But this is for my dad. I've got to go, pretty girl."
Your eyes flutter close as his hand grips your waist, pushing you back against the wall as his body pushes into yours.
"I'll make up for it, I promise."
You hum, burying your face into the curve of his neck, lips brushing his pulse point. "I should've drawn it out."
He laughs, hand smoothing down the back of your head. "Next time."
You open your eyes to look at him before pecking his lips. "Go, I'll be fine."
He kisses you one last time, another searing kiss that has you groaning into it before he is gone. Kelce and Topper already waiting for him by the exit. Both give you a parting wave, and the trio disappears. You exhale, but pause when you see a pair of familiar blue eyes watching you. He looks sharper than usual. His typical Island Club server uniform is traded for a bow tie and vest with a button-up white shirt. Neither of you makes a move to acknowledge the other, instead, you watch each other for a moment until someone calls his name, and then he is gone as well, and you are left alone.
Tag list: @fishingirl12 @gillybear17 @sublimepenguinpeach-blog @gills-lounge @emmafitzzz @redfieldfx @baby19sthings
Masterpage
“Gotta say, this is the first time I’ve seen Mav show up to a party with a date,” Kelce chuckles, throwing his arm around Mav’s shoulders after you both push through the small crowd blocking off the living room.
Your eyes cut across the room, landing on Rafe, and he smirks at you over the rim of his cup before his gaze shifts down to your hand in Mav’s. His gaze flickers away, his trademark smirk gone in a flash. Top notices the change in him as he claps him on the shoulder and murmurs in his ear about something.
Meanwhile, Mav is rolling his eyes and shoving Kelce away. “Get used to it. She’s going to be at every single one now. I don’t plan on ever being at any of these without her.”
You smile brightly at him and lean into his side, offering a quick peck to his jaw. He grins, tightening his hand on yours.
“Then get the pretty girl something to drink!” Kelce winks at you playfully, and you shake your head at him while holding back a laugh at his playful demeanor. “Anything you could want is in the kitchen. James’s parents stay stocked!”
“Perfect!” Mav grins at him before leading you towards the direction you are guessing is the kitchen. You cling to his hand but look for a familiar face or two. Natalie and Reese are nowhere in the crowd so far. Mav had promised they would be here, so you wait patiently for the cavalry to arrive. You help him mix two drinks before you both carry your cups out onto the covered back porch. His arm is around your waist as he greets his friends who are present. Fingers sliding under your shirt to brush your exposed hip.
Ben fist bumps you, and you laugh at your little tradition that is forming. He grins at you before glancing at Mav. “How’d that new board turn out?”
“Perfect,” Mav grins, launching into bragging about his new sponsored board as you let your gaze drift around the party. Top barrels out onto the patio, a mischievous smirk on his face, and your heart sinks a little at the sight when he spots you. Triumph glitters in his eyes as he nears.
“Let’s play a game!” Top grins, throwing his arm around Ben’s shoulders and leaning closer to you. You can smell the alcohol on his breath with ease. Wordlessly, Mav shifts to put you behind him slightly and away from the intoxicated kook.
“What are we five?” Natalie asks from behind you. Her hand brushes your back as she steps into your line of sight. You relax more. You would be safe if Topper stayed outnumbered.
Her head cocks to the side as she evaluates him with a hard gaze. “Top, do you need to be cut off?”
Topper rolls his eyes and turns away from her to Ben. His index finger jabbs into Ben’s chest, and his drink sloshes slightly in the cup he holds. “You game?”
“Sure.” Ben shrugs, not ready to be in a screaming match with anyone tonight over a stupid drunk game.
Natalie rolls her eyes before smiling at you. “We can do something else.”
“No, no, no,” Topper rushes, leaning towards you both again. “We need pretty girls for the game to work.”
Mav’s attention snaps to Topper now. His eyes darkened at the implication behind Topper’s words. Top’s usual golden boy façade is not fooling your boyfriend or friends for even a second.
“A truth or dare with a spin-the-bottle twist.” Topper shrugs, slurring his words slightly. “Or are you too afraid, Maybank?”
You smile at him as politely as you can. “I have someone to kiss anytime I want, Thornton, I don’t need to bring up a childish game to get some action like you.”
Topper rolls his eyes, but Mav’s lips press to your temple while he smirks at the blond kook.
“Come to think of it…” Natalie begins, leaning back into Reese’s chest as she grows bold. “All of us are in a relationship… so bother someone else.”
“What? Afraid you’ll like kissing Topper more than Reese?” Rafe asks over the rim of his cup as he steps into your growing circle. “Like you did with Ben, who isn’t in a relationship and agreed to play.”
“Low blow, Cameron,” Reese glares at him. “Don’t make me go lower.”
“Reese,” Mav warns, his hold on you shifting to pull you into his chest.
Reese rolls his eyes before letting his gaze flicker to you. A wordless apology already reflecting for you. You shrug telling him it is already forgiven before nuzzling into Mav’s chest, arms around his waist to hold yourself close to him.
“Just play the game,” Rafe continues despite the clear tension strung between the small group. Ben shifts, his body moving closer to you and Mav as he stares at the trouble-making pair. “Unless you are both worried that you’ll lose your girls in one night.”
Mav rolls his eyes, ignoring the baiting comment.
“We can even make a fun wager.”
“Like what?” Reese asks Rafe despite Natalie shaking her head at him not to get involved.
Rafe grins, lowering his cup while his gaze locks on you. You fight down the urge to look away and hold his gaze.
“The first team to bow out loses has their girls caddy for the winners Sunday during the golf tournament.”
You swallow, hand tightening on the back of Mav’s shirt. Your heart rate picks up, and your gaze shifts to the floor.
“And you leave her alone at the Island Club,” Ben adds with a gruff tone, his thumb hitching in your direction. “No more bothering her.”
“Done.”
“Yes!” Topper grins before leading the way back into the house and into what you are sure is James’s dad's study. An empty wine bottle is tucked under his arm. You cling to Mav’s arm, hoping on all the stars this will not go as horribly as you feel it will.
“Say the word, and I end this,” Mav whispers in your ear.
You shake your head, tipping your head back to look at him. “And being either of their caddy girls, no thanks.”
He nods before pecking your lips, and you both find spots near but far enough away from each other that the odds of spinning on someone else dwindle a bit.
Natalie settles next to you, a sympathetic look in her eyes. You squeeze her arm and focus on the rules as Topper declares it is his made-up game.
Everyone is two or three dares in when the bottle lands on you for the second time, and Topper smirks at you, rubbing his hands in excitement. This is the chance he has been waiting for. Reese had taken it too easy on your first time.
“Maybank, I dare you to wear this tie as a blindfold as someone of my choosing makes out with you for one minute, and then you have to guess who kissed you or skip your turn to spin.”
You glare at him for a second, hands tightening on your knees. Your gaze flickers to Mav, and he is staring at Topper with a fire in his eyes.
“That’s not fair, and you know it,” Natalie mutters before turning to you. “You can skip the turn. No one will judge you for it.”
“Ah, ah, ah,” Topper wags his finger at you. “No, skipping your turn, skipping only works if you get the guess wrong. You have to do the dare or lose the game.”
You huff before setting your shoulders back and lifting your chin. “Fine.”
Topper moves to blindfold you, but Natalie is quicker and yanks it out of his hand. Topper’s date of the night snickers briefly, but he shoots her a heated look, and she silences herself as Natalie quickly ties it around your head, blocking your view.
You can feel the pressure of the onlookers that have gathered as well as the players of the game. You inhale sharply when she helps you to your feet and walks you into the circle. The toe of your shoe hits the bottle as you try to focus on breathing through the threatening panic. You flinch, but Natalie squeezes your upper arms in reassurance before she lets you go and takes her spot back.
The soft rustle of clothing reaches you moments later before warm hands brush your hair back from your shoulders and fingers brush your jaw. You shiver, hands reaching forward to touch the warm body that is nearly pressing against you. You hope it is Mav, but the alcohol masks the cologne too much.
“Mav,” you whisper, voice shaking.
The soft press of lips meets yours, and you kiss back, hands fisting the soft cotton material of their shirt. It feels like Mav's shirt, but it is a polo, and almost all of them are wearing one tonight. The brush of his tongue against your lips has your breath hitching in your throat, and he takes the opportunity to deepen the kiss. His hand cups your head as his tongue toys with yours. This is not Mav. This is someone else entirely.
The beeping of the timer comes both too late and all too soon as his touch completely disappears, and you rip the blindfold away. Your cheeks heat as you look anywhere but at Mav.
“Guess,” Topper demands.
You swallow, eyes searching the faces of the various guys that are sitting around the circle. You feel the burn of his lips still and have to clear your throat before meeting Ben’s gaze. He is the safe bet, and you both know it, but the subtle shake of his head tells you that it is not him and you will lose your turn. The awkward moment settles in, and you decide you do not care if you lose a turn. You would not commit to kissing anyone else. For your sake and Mav's sake, Ben is the safe guess.
“Ben.”
“Wrong.”
You glare at Topper. “Then I lose my turn.”
He shrugs, pointing at your vacant spot. “So, have a seat.”
“I’m over this game,” Natalie mutters, glaring at the blond kook. “You got what you wanted, end the game, Topper.”
Topper laughs, leaning back on his hands as he stares at you and how close you are to panicking. “You’re right, I did. We’ll call it a draw until the next party.”
You do not listen to the protest as you immediately get to your feet and push your way out of the room. Tears burn as you rush down the hallway and into the half bathroom. Your chest heaving at the panic clawing inside of you. It felt like Mav’s stare is still burning into you, but you had been unable to meet his gaze.
The door opening pulls your attention. You look up into the mirror but freeze immediately. Rafe’s lean body wedges through the small gap before the door closes and is locked. He leans back against the wood and watches you in the mirror.
“It was you?” Your voice is barely a whisper, and it trembles.
He shrugs. “Thought you would know.”
You exhale, tearing your gaze from his to the porcelain sink. “I didn’t.”
He grunts but does not move or say anything else.
You shiver, skin prickling with what you have done. You squeeze your eyes shut against the betrayal flooding you. “You know…” you start, pressing your palms harshly against the marble counter. “Despite what you think, I never cheated. We were over long before I went to Barry’s bed, and this feels even worse than that did.”
He moves then, his body crowding against yours. “We weren’t though, Princess.”
Turning your chin, you look at him, trying to read him. “How come?”
“You know we weren’t.”
“We were. You ruined it, or do you not remember?”
Rafe swallows, his long fingers hooking under your chin. That gold signet ring catches the light and glitters in the mirror. “I ruined you, not us.”
You exhale, and he leans in. His mouth oh so close to yours once more.
“Want to know something?” His breath is warm against your face. “There are a lot of stupid things to do at a party like this, but I really want to do the stupidest thing I can think of right now?”
“And what’s that?”
The silence lingers for a frustratingly long second, and he reacts by crashing his mouth down on yours. You kiss him back. The tame kiss in front of the others is unmatched by this one. It is searing hot, desperate like it will mend all the hateful history you share. It leaves you both breathless, and he does not pull away. He just kisses you with the same unchecked desperation that lingers under your skin. Your hands cling to his shoulder and fist the soft material of his shirt as he lifts you onto the counter. And that is how he knows you still want him, that you still ache for him.
“I’ve missed this.” His expression is serious, his forehead bumping against yours as he breathes in your perfume that is mixed with the fruity drink from earlier. You would never tell him, but the way his eyes soften slightly when he looks at you drives you insane still to this day. The way he looks at you is different from how he looks at everyone else, and you are convinced no one sees it but you. Your own little secret about the Cameron boy. “You knew it was me, I know you did.”
“You know I knew you weren’t Ben when we kissed?”
He smirks, dragging his thumb over the soft skin just above the hem of your jeans.
“Do you know why?” You ask, hand pressing to his chest, feeling his heart race under your touch. He stays silent, heaving for air as his eyes burn you to your core. “Not because of your height or your cologne. It was because you tasted like disaster. Like betrayal. You, Rafe Cameron, taste like everything I have ever wanted, but can never have.” You breathe, your own chest heaving as his hands grip your thighs, pulling your legs around him. “And it’s going to fucking destroy us.”
His mouth finds yours in a rush, and you moan into his mouth, hands pulling his polo shirt up and off his head. Years of unchecked history and bad endings drown out right from wrong as he claims you again. Your nails rake down his chest as he grinds his hips into yours.
“Rafe!”
“Fuck, I’ve missed this,” he groans against your jaw, lips trailing down to your neck. His teeth and lips are greedy as he sucks and nips at your skin. You push forward, grinding against him. You gasp, head falling back as he rips your top down, and his mouth claims your breast. “Look at you… Fuck Baby. All mine. No matter who you date, huh?”
Your blood runs cold, the reality of your situation slamming into you at full force. Mav.
“Rafe, stop,” you rush, shoving at his chest. He releases the soft inside of your breast with a pop and stumbles backward, his mark already bruising your skin. “I’m a fucking idiot.” You mutter, hands pressing to your face after you cover yourself back up. Your body trembles while you try to collect yourself.
He nears again before you can react. His body presses against yours, and his hands brush yours away before he tips your chin back to look into your eyes as he speaks. “No matter what happens, part of you will always belong to me, Princess.”
“Rafe…”
“You know it, and I know it. Mav will know it too, one day.”
You nod, closing your eyes as a tear rolls down your cheek. “Please don’t tell him.”
“I won’t. But you will have to one day.”
Then he is gone within seconds, the bathroom door clicking shut, and you slump back against the mirror, embarrassment flooding you.
Tag list: @fishingirl12 @gillybear17 @sublimepenguinpeach-blog @gills-lounge @emmafitzzz @redfieldfx @baby19sthings
Masterpage
Spaghetti. You have decided it is what you will feed the pogues tonight at the Chateau. Taking care of John B and the other pogues along with your brother is all you have been able to think about lately, and you are determined to make sure the Chateau is in a decent, livable condition for the pogues. Making dinner with your favorite people, including Mav, has you smiling brighter than you can ever imagine.
“Well, well!”
Annoyance prickles down your spine, and you huff harshly, already knowing who it is behind you. On instinct, you tighten your grip on the jar of pasta sauce before turning to see Barry smirking at you as he leans back against the edge of the shelving unit.
The idea of the metal folding under his weight and burying him in groceries until he is gone pops into your head, but you shake it away and turn back to your browsing.
“What do you want, Barry?”
“Damn! I can’t shop like everyone else?”
You scoff, rolling your eyes while setting the jar into your basket. “We both know that is not why you are here.”
Even if he would not admit it, you both know that he followed you inside and had been lying in wait for this moment. Barry makes you uneasy, and he knows it.
He smirks, gold tooth flashing. “Saw those pogues this morning. All five of them…”
And there it is. The threat, and you know exactly who it is aimed at. Your brother. Why else would he mention the pogues?
“And?”
His smirk grows, and he drags his hand over his jaw. “Well… the way I see it, Peach if it can’t be like old times, then JJ can be the one to pay off your dad’s debt.”
You wipe the annoyance from your face and cock your head to the side in confusion. “I didn’t realize you were that desperate for the affection of a Maybank, Barry.” Anger blooms across his face, but you do not let him stew or even speak as you set your shoulders back and glare at him. “Stay away from my brother.” You sneer at him, hands tightening around the basket handles so tight your fingers turn white. “Or so help me…”
“Or what?” He interjects, clearly fuming at your remark and not understanding the threat you want to throw at him. “What will you do?”
You smirk then, shifting the weight of the basket to keep it between you. “I’m not just a pretty face anymore. Don’t push me.”
“Or that kook boyfriend of yours will come save the day?”
“I don’t need Mav to save me.” You glare at him. “I didn’t need Rafe back then, and I don’t need Mav now. It took me a long time and a lot of shit to develop a voice. But now that I have, I refuse to remain silent.”
“Are you threatening to snitch, Peach?”
“Only if you push my hand,” you mutter before slapping his hand away as he tries to reach for you. “Hard to call in a debt when you are sitting in a prison cell. Go the fuck away.”
Barry smirks, enjoying your anger. Without even intending to you have played right into where he wants you. He tsks with a shake of his head after. “So unladylike.”
“Fuck you, Barry,” you seethe, shoving the basket at his chest, and he grabs it before it can drop to the ground.
You push past him, only pausing momentarily when you see Kelce, Rafe, and Topper staring at you both. Two of the three are amused at the show before them, but the center looks less than pleased. You push past them as well. The brush of your body against his has a twisting feeling launching in Rafe’s stomach.
“Don’t,” you mutter to Rafe, aware of how this looks.
You can imagine the wheels turning in his head at the scene that unfolded before him.
Once outside, you inhale sharply, sucking fresh air into your lungs as you try to remember where you parked. A panic over your worst nightmare unfolding. Barry and Rafe are in one place and ready to torture you. Without a doubt, you know you can defend yourself, but you would rather have someone with you like your brother or any of the other pogues.
“Hey,” Rafe’s hand encloses your upper arm when you try to step off the curb.
With the intention to get as far away from the store as you can, you do not see it, and Rafe is the only reason you are not crushed on the pavement as a car rushes past. You turn away from the street and into his chest, a shocked gasp leaving you as you grip his shirt tightly.
“You good?” He asks, his voice dropping lower, turning almost soothing. “You okay?”
“I needed to get away.” You quietly explain, hands pressing against his chest ready to create space. This looks bad, and you know it. Your body burns from his touch. Strong familiar hands graze your waist. “We shouldn’t be touching, Rafe.”
He scoffs, tightening his grip. “You almost just got yourself killed.”
“I’ll be fine.”
Rafe steps that last inch closer. Leaning over you, he continues to keep his eyes locked on yours. “I saved you. I did that.” His eyes are heated as he stares down at you. “You don’t have to be this with me.”
Defiantly tipping your chin back, you meet his gaze head-on, challenging him. “It’s better to be strong, than pretty and useless. Don’t you think?”
He is silent, not impressed with you in the slightest. Fragments of your shared history weighing on both of you.
You roll your eyes, starting to take a step back, but he does not let go. “I’m fine. Being run over is the least of my concerns.”
Rafe smirks, keeping you closer to him. “So are you going to do to Mav what you did to me then? Cheat with that dirtbag?”
You inhale sharply, heart squeezing at his accusation. “Our relationship ended long before I ever slept with Barry.”
He laughs, a dark maniacal laugh. “Yeah?”
“Rafe!” Topper calls from the doorway into the shop. “You coming or not?”
“Go,” you murmur, yanking yourself free as Rafe looks over his shoulder to his friend. “Your buddies are waiting. Like always.”
He turns back to you, watching you for any kind of flicker of regret he so desperately wants you to feel, but it is not there. “You should go back to your side of the island and stay there, y/n.”
“Fuck you, Rafe.”
“Whatever. Don’t come crying to me when Mav dumps you.”
You stare after him in shock as he storms off, back into the shop. Barry is at one of the many windows, watching you with a wide smirk, having witnessed the shambles of you and Rafe falling apart even more. There is already a crater between you, and it only seems to grow wider and deeper with each interaction.
The pogues can tell you are upset when you arrive with the provisions from another store. Your attention shifts solely to prepping dinner. Silence and chopping all they hear as they watch you from a distance. You can hear faint murmurs of worry and JJ trying to get them distracted from your mood. Arms wrap around you, and lips press to your face over and over. You freeze until Mav’s cologne invades your sense of smell. His chest is warm against your back. You had not even realized he had shown up, your thoughts scattered to the wind over your day so far.
“Are you okay?” His lips brush your ear as he quietly asks you.
You turn and close your eyes before burying your face in his chest. He holds you tightly, pulling you as close as he can get you into his chest.
“Was it Rafe?”
“No.”
And it is not Rafe. It is mostly Barry and his promise to harm JJ if it meant he got what he wanted.
“What do you need, Baby?”
“Help me finish dinner?” You ask, lifting your head to look at him. “Are you staying to eat?”
He grins, pecking your forehead. “If you have room.”
“Plenty of room!” John B calls, and you laugh, glancing at them sprawled around the living room. You smile, leaning against your boyfriend as you watch them for a moment. Mav notices the light in your eyes now as you watch them. His heart warming at the sight of your happiness.
“Happy to come home, huh?”
“Thrilled,” you murmur before pecking his lips. Then you turn your attention to your second brother, a teasing tilt to your voice. “Thank you, John B, for letting a kook crash our dinner night.”
He grins, peeling himself off the couch and coming in to grab a beer. “For you, anything.” He ruffles the hair on top of your head before glancing as JJ crowds into the small kitchen space.
“We like him anyways.” JJ teases, and you laugh, glancing at Mav. He winks at you, leaning against the counter and taking the beer JJ offers him.
You watch them for a moment, admiring their sibling-like bond. Your heart clenches at the thought of Barry getting his hands on your brother. Those blue eyes alight with happiness as he jokes with your boyfriend and John B and how quickly Barry would snuff it out if given the chance. Their laughter fills the kitchen until it fades out as they all register you watching them.
“Hey…” JJ moves closer, and you immediately blink back the tears before clearing your throat.
“You’re my brothers, until the end of time. Even after that.” You murmur quickly and pull them both into you for a hug. “Now,” you whisper, clearing your throat again before gently shooing them out of the kitchen. “Now leave me to make dinner.”
They laugh before both fall into an empty chair, and Mav crowds you again. His arms looping around your waist, chin parking on your shoulder. “What happened?”
You turn your face to look at him before sighing. “I ran into Barry.”
His face shifts, anger washing over his features. “Did he hurt you?”
“No, Baby, he didn’t.”
Mav sighs, his hand cupping your face. Palm warm against your skin.
“He threatened JJ.”
“What?!”
Instead of answering him, for a moment you press your face into his palm. Your lips brush just above his wrist. You try to calm your aching heart as you think about sharing this information with him. “He said that if it can’t be like old times… then JJ can be the one to pay the debt.” You look up at him, blinking away tears. “I threatened him. I promised him I would sell him out for his past crimes.”
Mav pulls you into his chest, his body wrapping around you to hold you close as you share the weight of your burden with him instead of your brother.
“Dinner is going to overcook,” you whisper against his chest after a few moments pass.
“Fuck it. We’ll order pizza.”
You laugh, and he joins in before pressing his lips to the crown of your head.
“Let me finish, and then after we eat, you and I will cuddle together in the hammock and watch these weirdos do stupid shit.”
Mav laughs again, and you giggle before pulling away and stirring both pots.
I’m going to try to post tonight. But I still need to pack for my trip… because I procrastinated like a dummy. I’ll be in Cincy for a few days and will try and catch up on everything once I’m back.
Hi! I just want to let you know if tumblr ever gives you trouble again first see if it needs to be updated if that doesn’t work close the app completely and then re open it again that usually works for me!!! Love you!!❤️
Hi! I appreciate that. It was on my laptop so I used the url, not the app. I think it just hated me for a minute. 😂 love you too! 💕
will there be 'all in my head' part 4? 🩷 i love your writing so so much!! the dialogue is so beautifully realistic and i really feel like i'm hearing/seeing rafe! especially that scene where reader tells him ward is gone in part 3!! he's hurting but so destructive 😢 it was so true to character and it made my heart ache!!! just wanted to tell you how much i loved it and how eager i'd be for more <3 🥹
There will be. I’m weighing my options on how to continue it. Thank you so much for you generous compliments!! They warm my heart. I hope to share more with you soon! 💕
“Missed me!” You yell at JJ as he throws an empty beer can just past you. Sticking out your tongue at him is the perfect bait before you wink at him. “That’s 0 for 6, right?”
“4.” He mutters, picking up another crushed can littering the ground by the fire. Kie will have him picking every single one up once the game is over. You both know it.
You grin at him. “Guess you need to work on your aim.”
Pope laughs, enjoying the banter while Sarah and John B are busy making out by the fire. Kiara is inside, pulling things together for s’mores.
Another beer can falls a few inches to your right, and you laugh before smirking at JJ. “Missed again!”
“I’m going to get you, one way or another.” JJ is growing irritated, and it makes you grin bigger. He scoops up another before hurling it at you. This one rockets past your face by less than an inch.
His widened gaze meets yours, both of you shocked at how close he got to hitting you in the face.
“Missed me.”
He rolls his eyes and gets up, but you know what is about to happen, so you quickly move to put the making out pair between you. Pope grins, watching with delight in his eyes. The two of you bickering always makes Pope laugh. You were quick-witted, and JJ could flirt with just about anyone. It is pure entertainment for anyone who gets a chance to witness it.
You are well aware of what he is tempting. Even as you try to playoff his advances discreetly, you grin, butterflies exploding in your belly. “What? Throwing beer cans at me isn’t enough?”
He makes another move to get around the fire. His ball cap comes off, and he flexes it between his palms. You shake your head at him, a warning shining in your eyes, afraid he would throw it and miss you, and it land in the fire. His favorite red cap burned to ash because he could not help himself.
“JJ,” you murmur gently. “Don’t you dare.”
He laughs before he flicks his wrist, and the hat falls just shy of the fire. You tilt your head at him in surprise. His confidence rewarded him in it not burning.
“Missed me, missed me.” You stick out your tongue. “Now you’ve gotta…” You fade out, cheeks burning. All eyes are on you, including Sarah and John B.
“Now I’ve got to what?” JJ asks, drawing closer.
“Nothing.” You shrug, side-stepping around Pope’s chair and frantically searching for something to distract him or save yourself with. “Forget it.”
“No, no, no.” JJ smirks, using his longer legs to close even more distance between you. “Now I gotta what?”
You flush hotter, gaze catching on Sarah’s face. She is smirking, enjoying herself, and clearly ignoring your silent pleas for help. In your desire to get her help, you miss JJ closing the distance. Then there is the hot press of his hands around your waist. You jump in surprise, a sharp gasp falling from your lips.
JJ laughs, enjoying having the upper hand while he looks at you. His blue eyes burn as they lock with yours. “Now I gotta what?”
You shiver, fingertips digging into his arms as he holds you. “… kiss me.” You whisper, voice slightly trembling. The butterflies in your stomach increase by 100 times.
And he does. JJ Maybank kisses you in a searing kiss. Sarah gasps, and John B shares a yelp of surprise with Pope before they wolf whistle and jostle each other in joy. But you cannot help yourself, and you kiss him back. Your hands move up his arms, his shoulders, and into his hair. Your fingers twist in the blond locks as the kiss deepens. Your toes curl in your shoes, and you shiver, pressing your body closer to his.
“Whoa!” Kiara’s voice echoes across the lawn.
His grip tightens a fraction, asking you to stay in his arms. Worry clouds his gaze as he waits to see if you will shame him or stay with him. The chance of his luck running out just as he gets to you scares him.
“What is going on?” Kiara whispers louder than she intended. You laugh, resting your head on JJ’s shoulder as you evaluate each pogue for any objection to this new connection. It would be against a rule, but at the same time, no one objected to Sarah and John B. And you liked JJ so very much.
“Finally,” John B grins, winking at you both. “JJ can stop complaining about getting nowhere with you.”
JJ shakes his head, hiding his burning cheeks by ghosting his lips across your temple. You look at him in surprise to which he shrugs at. The confidence wavering slightly before he leans in again. “He’s not wrong.”
“He never is.” You murmur, pecking his lips. "You can kiss me anytime you want; you know."
discoholicmusic
stormborns
annaxmalina
baratheonpilled
ellievsbear
titsay
pixelskylines
izzy806
blakekathryn
gummygunk