Listen up, Bitchcakes.

JESSICA MIRIAM DREW Former Spider-Woman. I've worked for everyone. Mentor & Mother.

[charmed]

Hawkeye #009

[ofjessdrew]

@ofblackwidows, @agentxmockingbird

[ofjessdrew]

daisy-quaking-johnson:

[Text: *insert New Girl theme here* ]: This is honestly not even near the first time someone has asked me something like this. -_- [Text: *insert New Girl theme here* ]: And it doesn’t really affect me like that. Unless I force the quakes inwards, but I don’t do that. [Text: *insert New Girl theme here* ]: So, it probably could if I wanted it to, but I haven’t tried it.

[Text: 🌎  Quake]: Ha!!! You’ve just got a lot of curious friends.

[Text: 🌎  Quake]: Why not??? Would it kill you? I’d imagine it’d disrupt your insides.

[Text: 🌎  Quake]: I’m tempted to say you should try it, but the adult side of me says it’s too dangerous and you shouldn’t.

[ofjessdrew]

$

Send “$” for an ACCIDENTAL text.

[Text: Roger 😊 (Dinah)]: If he’s fussy, there’s breastmilk in the fridge. 

[Text: Roger 😊 (Dinah)]: Unless you accidentally put in your coffee again... In which case... YOU’RE GROSS.

[Text: Roger 😊 (Dinah)]: Just give him a cookie if he’s really hollering. Or let him climb his nursery wall. BUT DO NOT LET HIM FALL. I WILL MURDER YOU.

[ofjessdrew]

%

Send “%” for a CURIOUS text.

[Text: 🌎  Quake]: You know when you cause an earthquake? Does it make you vibrate on the inside?

[Text: 🌎  Quake]: Does it feel... y’know...? Sexual? 😂

[yashagf-deactivated20220323]

[amyjake-archive-deactivated2017]

I always thought it would be funny to kill somebody at a funeral.

[ofjessdrew]

ofblackwidows:

Natasha flashed Jess a matching smirk and shook her head, crossing her arms at her chest. “Is that what does it for you, Jess?” She chuckled and hit the other’s hand with her own. “Oh come on, we’re hardly that bad. I guess you’re right though. They do have certain expectations don’t they?”

“Oh yeah. You speaking Russian has always been my weak spot. A lot of people think it’s kicking ass, but really it’s you,” Jess laughed. When Natasha said they weren’t that bad, she shrugged a shoulder. “Eh, I guess we can be alright. You more than me, you big softie,” she grinned. “Yep. Definitely. I like to think that my wonderful charm and wit make up for my resting bitch face, though.” 

[ofjessdrew]

daisy-quaking-johnson:

After finishing the page she was reading, Daisy looked up as the woman approached her. She didn’t cause another earthquake this time because, unlike the annoying man, she thankfully wasn’t trying to flirt with her. She placed a bookmark on the page she had been reading and then closed the book, setting it down on her lap. “Not normally, no.” She was generally on the move when she caused quakes. This time, not so much. “But I’m in a pretty clear open space, other than a few trees. Isn’t that supposed to be the safest place to be? Besides, that earthquake wasn’t all that threatening. Trust me.”

Jess took a seat next to the woman, crossing one leg over the other. She’d vaguely remembered hearing about a girl from SHIELD who could cause earthquakes, and she was beginning to think she’d found her. “Not normally? What made today different, huh?” she asked, but already knew the answer. “Well, for an unthreatening earthquake it seemed to scare a lot of people.” Looking around, Jess made sure there was nobody nearby eavesdropping before opening her mouth again. “You did it, didn’t you?”

[ofjessdrew]

TEXTS → SPIDER-WOMEN

Gwen: You need to stop lying about those senses, Jessica. 😜

Gwen: That's where you're wrong, Spidey Grandma. I'm already stealing it. 😎

Gwen: Bet you're glad you retired now these Uncle Sam posters are up, huh?

Jess: I never lie, Gwendolyne.

Jess: You wish. I'm a legend, kid. You can't replace Jessica Drew! People do seem to love you, though.

Jess: Fuck yeah I am. Imagine me being told what to do by the government? We'd have a war on our hands, and you'd have to pick my side because I taught you everything you know. ;)

[phoabetonkin-archive]

Jessica Drew in Doctor Strange (2017) #22

[hatofunthinking]

(Avengers Vol. 4 #23, 2012)

[offallenfeathers]

@ofjessdrew

[ofjessdrew]

@ofblackwidows

[Text: Carol 🌟 ❤️  (Natasha Romanova)] Girl, I miss you! When are you coming here? It feels like I haven’t seen you in forever, and it’s really starting to break my heart. You know I love you and it makes me sad when you’re not here.

[achildrenscrusadeonacid]

Visit Original Link

[darlingstarlets]

[havanasliu]

[ofjessdrew]

bewarexthexbatman:

“Its batman”Bruce sighed looking at her as she backed away “And excuse me for being suspicious when someone was practicing there “moves” on a rooftop this late at night”He gazed at the woman with the ice cold eyes of the batsuit “Do you know of any trouble makers near here? “

"What was that? Did you say your name is Batbro?” There was nothing Jess enjoyed more than winding someone up. “It’s a free country, Batdude,” she replied. “Shouldn’t I be suspicious of you? You’re a man dressed as a bat. That’s not normal behaviour. Less normal than me scaling walls.” When he asked about troublemakers, Jess rolled her eyes. “No. And even if I did, I’m more than capable of dealing with them, Batboy.” 

[brcinstcrm]

                 “——-watch out,” she almost exclaimed as she seemed to drop from the air. she had enough control to not completely fall on her face or on the person. despite that, she also knew she shouldn’t be swinging around, times weren’t like they used to be and she might be confused for spider-woman—- that’d be annoying. 

[ofjessdrew]

“Cindy!” Jess yelled, looking up towards where the voice came from, then darting to the side to avoid the girl dropping on her. Was she always going to be a thorn in her side? It definitely seemed that way. “What’re you doing?” she asked in an exasperated tone. “You could give someone a fright, or kill them with a clumsy landing.” 

[why-i-love-comics]

Silk #5 (2016)

written by Robbie Thompson art by Veronica Fish & Ian Herring

[agentxmockingbird]

@ofjessdrew