“I do,” Sawyer confirmed, marveling for the breifest moment at how hauntingly perfect those words sounded in his voice, but now was far from the time to think about something like that so he let it go, tried to redirect his attention, “I don’t … don’t believe in um…. in this.. this slavery … slavery crap though…. you… you know… know that,” he insisted, Asar knew him, even though they hadn’t known eachother for all that long he still felt like Asar KNEW him, that he knew that Sawyer wasn’t like that, atleast… he sure hoped he did….
Asar had a point, he hadn’t cared about Sawyer’s stutter- much to his shock- he supposed if Asar could get past THAT fat, glaring flaw he should be able to get past almost anything, but there was just something different about the fact that Sawyer was over a hundred years old and still had never had so much as a kiss, something that instead of being just a flaw seemed more like… more like a problem, it wasn’t a deformity that he was born with or that HAPPENED to him, it was a choice, something that he could change whenever he wanted, and yet he made the choice NOT to change it, it went past a physical flaw, it was something mental at this point, something that said Sawyer wasn’t quite right in the melon, or atleast he had always heard that’s what it meant, “I… I don’t….. I don’t know,” he finally said, he never really understood the concept of virgnity or sex in a moral context, sex meant reproduction, virginity just meant that he hadn’t tried to reproduce, and for some reason that was inherently wrong for an adult, epsecially an adult male, wich he always thought was a little confusing, didn’t females usually want to reproduce more? It wasn’t that Sawyer didn’t want to have kids- he did- he just hadn’t had the chance to have them with the guy he wanted to have them with yet, although now here Asar was proposing this thing and he … he wanted to… and he made the active choice to just STOP thinking because his head was starting to hurt…
Asar’s sudden nervousness was confusing, there must be something Sawyer had said or done to cause him to react this way but he couldn’t figure out what it was, “I want to,” He said after a moment, sitting up a little bit more on his elbows, “I won’t… won’t regret it,” he couldn’t explain what he felt for Asar, it was all kinds of confusing, but … but he knew that it felt good and it felt comfortable and he wanted it to stay more than he could describe, and he wanted Asar to be with him forever, part of his family, he wanted a family and he wanted Asar to be a big part of it… that’s what he knew, and he knew that when you felt like that for someone, you should just let your body do what it wanted to do- within reason, as long as you both wanted it… the kiss only caught him a little off-guard, at this point sort of expecting the surprise affection and slowly, uncertainly, wrapping an arm around the dragon’s back, keeping him in place, silently begging him not to leave, “I want to,” he repeated when the kiss ended, nosing against the dragon’s neck and inhaling his scent, “I want you… Asar…. I want… I just…. I just want you, for… for good… for always… forever… I just… want you,”
Silently those two words circulated around Asar’s head, they had been uttered in crystal clear clarity. A tiny smile pulling at the edges of his lips as he silently acknowledged it. However, it didn’t last long, his expression suddenly turning troubled. “I know… but…” He fell silent, the words trapped in his throat. Shaking off the stifled words, he sighed in resignation. It wasn’t worth arguing. “Yeah, I know.” He murmured, not wanting to bother with the what if scenarios bouncing around in his head. Deep down he knew Sawyer wouldn’t abandon him but he couldn’t help but fear being replaced. He didn’t want to fade into the woodworks again… “Sorry… I’m being stupid…” He chuckled; realizing that he was probably spoiling whatever mood had sparked between them.
In Asar’s mind people where riddled with flaws but that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. Not all flaws had to be bad, if anything, they made people individuals. There was something endearing about quirks, especially Sawyer’s, but maybe Asar was biased. He could care less about trivial things such as flaws and virginity. Sawyer had every right to make the decisions he had made, who was Asar to judge him? Besides, he wasn’t exactly in a position to judge. Despite Sawyer’s rejection of the concept of slavery, which he couldn’t quite grasp, he was and would probably always be a slave. Sawyer’s voice brought him bubbling back to the surface of reality, his brow creasing slightly at the man’s words. “Listen, virginity is a social construct, in other words… fuck society.” He replied with a chuckle, a shit-eating grin pulling across his face. “Societal constructs are a bunch of bullshit anyway.” He added off-handedly, biting his lip at the thought. Sawyer probably didn’t want to hear him get on his soapbox about that one. “Anyway, don’t sweat it…” He replied, not wanting to push Sawyer into something he probably had no interest in. The moments were few and far in between that Asar ever felt this way, it felt foreign and strange to feel these feelings again, especially when he had only really ever felt them once. He almost felt bad for even suggesting something like this, he felt guilty…
Nervousness flooded through him the more he thought about it. He should have never even brought attention to it. Was it too late to flee to the bathroom? Dark eyes shifting to the bathroom but he stayed glued in place as he looked back to Sawyer. His friend’s words sent his mind reeling, a perplexed look crossing his face. The dragon could feel words sitting on his tongue, but he couldn’t muster the strength to speak. He was at a loss for words, his face inching closer to Sawyer’s, lips brushing lips feverishly. Instead of talking… Maybe he should show Sawyer how to felt. Feeling an arm wrap around him, he flushed, heart pounding in his chest as he pulled away reluctantly. A soft sound emitting from his throat as Sawyer pressed his nose into his neck, feeling his warm breath touch his skin as he moved his neck slightly to allow Sawyer more access. Oddly enough, he almost wanted the other to bite him, however Sawyer’s voice pulled him back to reality again. At first he started to reply in his mother tongue, his voice drafting off as this became apparent, his arousal increasing with the closeness and what it promised. Those words stirred something in him, something he thought was long dead… “I want you too…” He breathed softly, his scratchy voice a low mumble as his eyes darkened with desire. “I want to protect you… and… love you… I want o be yours.” He admitted quietly, knowing all too well what those words now meant. Never in his life did he think that he would utter those words. Smiling gently, he closed his eyes, something suddenly occurred to him. “But I don’t think you want to destroy your kitchen…” He chuckled, signaling that maybe they should relocate. Moving a hand, he gently tugged at Sawyer’s shirt playfully. “And I don’t mind if you want to bite me…” Asar admitted earnestly, wondering if Sawyer was trying to hold back. Balling up his itching palm, he resisted the urge as he moved a hand to squeeze Sawyer’s thigh instead. “We can go slow and see where it goes.”
