Caution: Blues

I hope if i backread several years from now, I can tell that I have lived my life.

[quotes-motivational]

[nfnsnfns-deactivated20190418]

loving me is such a big leap. you have to deal with my trust issues, anxiety, insecurities, jealousy, drama, paranoia, and mood swings. i sometimes ask for many updates, get jealous of people from your past who should be irrelevant by now.

so kudos to my future husband, wherever you may be. thank you for finding me worth keeping after all.

[thesoftestcloud]

[baekebyan]

I know you are hurt right now, but don’t worry. I can wait. No need to rush, no pressure. Take your sweet time and I will wait for you patiently. I will wipe all of your tears on your cheeks. Every day, every time you cry. I will catch every tear and turn them into smiles. I will be your feet if you are tired enough to walk. I will walk for you, on your entire race. Lie on my back, I got you. Or we can rest, I will be by your side. Every second of the day. I will listen to your endless drama. I won’t leave you like the stars don’t leave the sky. Yes, there will be days that you won’t see me but it doesn’t mean that I turned my back to you, I will always be here. Lighting your path at night. Giving all of my support and strength at day. Don’t worry, I won’t leave you. I know you can pick up your pieces, put back your walls up and learn to appreciate and love again. You can finish your race, I believe in you. Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine. I will be waiting for you.

(via baekebyan)

[strictangparents]

Before you decide to ghost someone, grow some balls and tell them that you don’t want to talk to them anymore. That way the other person doesn’t spend the foreseeable future thinking that there is something wrong with them, and you don’t come across as a cowardly twat

[thepersonalquotes]

[warmroses]

I want someone to think I’m the most beautiful woman they’ve ever seen. Someone who thinks I have an amazing mind and soul. That I can move mountains. That gets weak in the knees when I look at them. Someone that lifts me up when I have the dark days. I want something real.

[eearth-deactivated20180601]

Make a habit of choosing love over fear and watch how your whole life changes.

[s-unberry]

“Someone will tell you that she’s seeing someone someday and that she’s happy and your hands will stop working. You’ll have to work hard to hold onto whatever you’re holding. I hope it’s not glass, I hope it’s not breakable. Suddenly you’ll remember everything that you ever loved about her. Everything that ever moved you to tears, made your insides feel like they were tying themselves into knots. That she was loyal, that she was open for you, that she smiled against your mouth when you kissed. That it felt easy, like God had put the two of you together deliberately, like it had been the plan all along. But for whatever reason, you let her go and you thought that it was the right thing and for a little while, it felt like you knew exactly what you were doing. Except now all the parts of you that touched her knows that you’re never going to be able to touch her again and that hurts. Even your fingers are sad, even your stomach is aching from the loss of it all. You’re never going to get that again and that’s why your regret looks like artwork that would have been masterpiece if you’d finished it. Your regret looks like plucking a flower before it’s bloomed. So maybe you’ll call her and you’ll tell her that you miss her and she’ll sound gentle on the phone but not in love with you anymore. She’ll say ‘we happened and we were important but you let me go, I’m sorry, but you let me go’ and that’s how you’ll know.”

— Azra.T  (via 5000letters)

[purplebuddhaproject]

“Brave soul, don’t forget that you have survived every onslaught of darkness and fought through hell to get here. You are stronger than you give yourself credit for.”

— (via purplebuddhaquotes)

[beautifuls]

2018 is abt recovery but it won’t happen overnight. it’ll take time and patience and that’s okay.

[wordsnquotes]

““Wrong timing? I’ve heard people talking about it. I don’t believe there’s anything like “wrong timing” or that you meet someone when you’re not ready for each other. I truly believe that it’s always the right time for you to go through specific situations whenever they happen. I learned that everything happens at the right time for a good reason. There’s a reason why you meet specific people at a specific time, there’s a reason for people leaving you when you’re at your lowest. (And there’s a reason for your relationship to end, right when you start depending on the other person to make you happy and love you the way you should actually love yourself.) It might take some time but eventually you’ll come to realize what a blessing certain events are. Sometimes what seemed to have a negative effect on your life will turn out as the most appreciative lessons in your life. There’s a a plan for each of us and it’s such a liberating thought to know that we don’t have to understand it yet. That’s life. Stop denying the present moment. Flow with it. Have faith.“”

— - @thissikhgirl

[oh-that-cookie-smile]

Last time i went to church sabi ko kay Lord, instead of asking “bakit”, bakit ako naiiwan palagi, bakit palagi akong nagbibigay, bakit palaging hindi ako napipili, i just thought that maybe, He has better plans for me. He knows i needed space in my life para sa mga tamang tao. I know and i understand that he’s just removing toxic people in my life so i can welcome a new one. Someone better. Someone who will stay no matter what. Gusto ko lang sabihin na thank you. Thank you for everything you did to me. One year knowing you is just a short time but it was really a memorable one. You made me happy. I was happy. Beyond incomparable. So eventhough it hurts too much that all i can feel now is just pain and grudge and anger, mas naiisip kong maging thankful sayo. I know hindi mo gustong mangyari to. We never did. I believed you when you said mahal mo ako. I know mahal mo ako. But i know also it’s not the same as her. I gave you a chance kahit madaming beses kitang pinagtulakan, kahit ilang beses ko sinabing wag ako, kahit ilang beses kong pinigilan din ang sarili ko and still i took the risk kahit masaktan ako na baka sakali mapalitan ko siya kahit alam ko i only have 10% chance. Kase nga mahal na din kita. Kase nga for some selfish reason gusto kong maging masaya. With you. But then deep inside pa din when i let you in, you still have a whole part of her with you. Hindi ko alam kung san ko ilulugar ang sarili ko. Or maybe i know, pero dahil mahal kita, gusto ko lang din maging part mo kahit konti lang. But i guess hanggang dito na lang talaga. It was destined to be like this from the start. But I dont regret anything. You did everything to make me happy. Everything, except choosing me. You took care of me. You loved me even in my most unloveable self, even in my worst state, even with my worst past, you loved me for what i am, with my flaws and all. I believed that because I felt it. And that made me really happy. For me, it was enough. And this time, i really want you to be happy. I am writing this to you hindi para hingin sayo na ako na lang, sana ako na lang. Because i know kahit kelan hindi magiging ako. I just have one request. Please, do not approach me anymore. Do not show any single kindness to me anymore. Delete me completely from your life. Wag mo na kong kakausapin. Not a single word. I have respect your decision. I hope you do mine. Sabi mo gusto mo kong maging masaya. Then let me be. Mahal na mahal kita that the best thing I can give you is letting you go. Give that to me also. Please. This is and will be the last time, really, swear, last na talaga promise, I give up. Thank you. Please be happy. This is my goodbye. -Fay

[oh-that-cookie-smile]

Sobrang mahal na mahal kita that the best thing that I can give you is letting you go.

[oh-that-cookie-smile]

Gloomy and stressed and sad and i dunno what i feel now. I wanna cry but no tears come out. Stubborn.

[oh-that-cookie-smile]

[oh-that-cookie-smile]

Gusto kong ipost dito yung Spoken Word Poetry ko kaso baka manakaw lang so nevermind. Not really saying na maganda ang piece ko, but still.