Julia was exhausted. The almost three-hour drive to get home had only exacerbated the feeling as she looked at the clock that read ten-thirty in bright red letters. Her eyes scanned the living room for remnants of her own children using the space throughout the day. She had missed them, even though they had only been gone for two days. She missed their hugs, their kisses, and the 'I love yous'. Ten years prior if you would have asked Julia if she ever would have considered having a family, she would have said no. Her focus had been on her career then, not even dating had been on her radar. Yet, the moment she met Dulce it had all changed. Her life had changed for the better with her and Daniella and now Melody. Her family, they were her world and she would do anything to protect them. Yet there were no signs of the girls being in the room as she was sure her mother had them clean up the messes they made through the day. The home was seemingly spotless, which as of lately never seemed to be the case with her and her wife. Their lives had been busy jumping from having two children to three overnight. Yet March, she didn't know any of this. She didn't know that in the living room where they were standing was where their younger daughter was born. Not letting Julia finish her breakfast. March wasn't aware that ten feet away from where they stood over in the kitchen, Julia had passed out. It had been the scariest moment of her life. The thought of not being able to see her wife, and her kids again. Paying the bigger price of losing not only the child that she had been carrying but the chance to ever have more children. It was traumatic and there were still days where she struggled, but her kids and her family are what kept her going. It had been a dark time for her and their whole family. Lainey came into it only a couple weeks after their own loss. Her parents were willing to care for the newborn with everything else their family was going through, but Dulce and Julia knew they should care for the little girl. That they were able to care for her like she was one of their own. Julia understood her sister's frustration at that moment. She had entrusted Lainey into her parent's care, not Julia. If it was Julia with her own girls, she would feel the same way. Their children meant everything to her and she had entrusted her parents to watch them and found out they were with someone else she would be pissed too.
Julia's eye went from the clock back to her sister letting off a soft sigh before she softened her tone at the realization she had come off a little harsh. A look was given to Julia by her mother who had been staying at the home with her girls. " She's upstairs sleeping because it's ten-thirty at night. " Julia spoke trying to remain calm though she didn't really like that March was in her home where her girls resided. Their safe space. " You're not waking her up just so you know. We have her on a schedule finally. " Dulce and Julia working so hard to get Lainey on a schedule over the last couple of months. This was her house and she hoped that her sister respected her own rules, even when it retained her child who had been in her care. There was a long silence after Julia's last words. Part of Julia listening upstairs hoping her girls had not woken from all of the commotion going on downstairs. " You look good though. " Julia said genuinely because March really looked a lot healthier than the last time Julia had seen years ago. It had been before Melody was born that she saw her last.
Already, March wanted to scream, to thrash and ball her fists in the air. Yes, ironically, it would make her a child. Sometimes, that was what it took to make anyone listen, to forget about civility and scream at the top of your lungs. Sometimes, March still did that: she'd take her pillow and just scream and cry until her throat was raw and it was hard to breathe. She'd let the pillowcase go damp from the tears as she'd pass out from the headaches. She wished she could do that right then and there, just scream until someone listened or she would pass out. Unfortunately, she had to be an adult. She continued to rub the stone in her pocket violently; she was sure that her thumb would be bruised once she finally had a look.
There was a gross sense of ownership. March wanted to stomp her foot and demand to see her daughter. 'She's mine, she's mine!' Was the thought that repeated when she was told she couldn't wake her. Her nostrils flared. God, the audacity!
March pushed that thought away and did her best to just be polite. "Please, I-I just want to see her. I promise, I'm better. I know this," she motioned as though Julia would know that she meant the whole 'breaking and entering' she had just performed, "Doesn't really prove a whole lot, but I am. I was just desperate and I didn't know... I wasn't thinking, but I'm good. I literally just want to see her..." My baby, not yours...
