no, im not ok

19 | 5’8 hw : 136 | cw : 124 | ugw : 110 this is my safe place please don’t report just block <33

[okbutlikeshutup]

i was thinking back on my childhood, and from as young as i can remember my mum used to weigh me and my brother weekly and track it in a book and then COMPARE us, track what we ate, and she wonders WHY i struggle so badly?!

[okbutlikeshutup]

i’ve started going on walks as my form of exercise and it’s making me feel a little better, and distracts me from the guilt of eating :)

[okbutlikeshutup]

so i stuck to 931 cals yesterday and measured and tracked EVERYTHING (i usually forget about sugar milk etc) and i’ve woken up and lost 2 POUNDS YAY.

[okbutlikeshutup]

idk if i have severe body dysmorphia or im just not losing weight 🤡 i hate myself

[okbutlikeshutup]

i’ve been stuck on the same weight for weeks now despite eating less than 1,200 cals MAX, mainly 800 cals and less, i just don’t understand :(

[okbutlikeshutup]

i gained 4 pound on my period, please DONT WEIGH YOURSELF ON YOUR CYCLE.

it affected me so so so badly, please don’t do it to yourself.

[okbutlikeshutup]

i don’t think my mum will realise i’m actually ill until i’m extremely underweight :)

[okbutlikeshutup]

like she automatically thinks i’m better after i eat one meal

[okbutlikeshutup]

i don’t think my mum will realise i’m actually ill until i’m extremely underweight :)

[caffeinatedopossum]

My dash is dead, reblog if you:

have an ed account active in May 2021

are queer

have an ed and a chronic illness/physical disability

are traumatized/have ptsd

have other mental illnesses

are pro recovery

I'd love to be friends!

[parental-issues]

i’d love to be mutuals <3

[okbutlikeshutup]

chewing gum has suddenly become a fear food for me because it makes me insanely bloated, it genuinely terrifies me :/

[okbutlikeshutup]

ok sooooo weird, i measured today and lost 2 inches off all the places since last time yet i’ve gained 2 pounds??

not sure if it’s just water weight because like how is that possible - however i have just come off my period so i’m thinking that could be why.

[tamango]

I lost 4.2lbs overnight

Reblog to lose the same and I wish you all the best of luck!

(I do not promote anything)

[okbutlikeshutup]

i didn’t eat until 8pm today and was full after 500 cals, YAY, after a week of eating 1200 it feels so good

[okbutlikeshutup]

i’m only happy with an empty stomach

[okbutlikeshutup]

why is my ed suddenly letting me eat 😃😃😃

[okbutlikeshutup]

i hate myself.

[okbutlikeshutup]

hi <33 just feeling really shit the past few days as i’ve eaten a ‘normal’ amount of food every night but then purged after it which does result in me feeling a lot better, but i don’t want to be like this. i swear my ed switches and it’s so tiring :(