ᴘʀᴏᴛᴇᴄᴛ ﹠ sᴇʀᴠᴇ (autoplay)

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                                          HEAD ON OVER !!!

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                                          HEAD ON OVER !!!

[omcrtarchive-blog]

                                          HEAD ON OVER !!!

[omcrtarchive-blog]

                                          HEAD ON OVER !!!

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when u waiting for that verification email to send

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lowkey want to archive this blog but my follower count tho

[neonkontra]

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' how do you delete people? '

( SHIT MY FRIENDS SAY —- ACCEPTING. )

          ❛ i’d answer that ... but ... then i might have to delete you. ❜ 

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“This is the woman that smacked her brother’s friend in the face with a dildo.”

( SHIT MY FRIENDS SAY ---- ACCEPTING. )

           ❛ oh. okay --- so if i ever wanna get smacked in the face with a dildo, she’s the chick to visit. ❜ a short, crude pause.             ❛ —– unless you want me to arrest her or somethin’. ❜

[floofinbird]

shit my friends say as starters: round 2

“Why would you plant your COTTON over LAVA?”

“It’s hotton.”

“Why would you put ice cubes in PEE?!”

“You can’t get human remains at Goodwill!”

“YOU JUST SAID WE LIVE IN A GIANT NIPPLE!”

“You used to be all whips, ballgags, and leather, and now you’re just leather. And not even the right kind!”

“The cheese sticks have to come from SOMEWHERE.”

“I have to watch every video with an American Woodcock in it.”

“Excuse you, I like capsacin, but not on my DICK!”

“Can you imagine being pepper sprayed in the dick?”

“I DON’T HAVE ONE, I WAS BORN IN PHILADELPHIA!”

“So, like… should I just leave, and go drink vodquila?”

“SINCE WHEN WERE YOUR GONADS IN YOUR POCKET?”

“Hi, there, friend, I’m gonna give you hope, and I’m gonna FUCKING EAT IT!”

*inhales deeply* “How do you delete people?”

*bleats*

“Just shove a recorder up my ass and fart the national anthem.”

“Wait a minute…THESE ARE JUST COTTON BALLS IN PETROLEUM JELLY!”

“We aren’t even full fucks, we’re just nuggets of fuck.”

“I’m not here for five minutes and we start talking about an ass in a casket!”

“HA HA! YOU WEREN’T EVEN PART OF THIS CONVERSATION AND I DRAGGED YOU IN!”

“It’s like mozzarella in lingerie.”

“No, _____, you’re not for people anymore.”

“i’M GONNA PLAY SOME TETRIS”

“What the flipflapfrickityfrackfripfrap FUCK”

“This is the woman that smacked her brother’s friend in the face with a dildo.”

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dumbo idiot i hate tinder sm

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venturedforth.

             ❛  i’m just a good guesser, it seems. ❜  a minute smirk, shoulders shrug NONCHALANT as her head tips. ❛  i’m glad you’re okay but……you should be more careful.  ❜   features then alter a mien of PERTURBATION as crimson slithers along the bridge of his nose and corners of his mouth. ❛  come on —- why don’t i help you clean up? don’t want it staining your clothes. ❜

            ❛ ----- by the sound of it, yeah. ❜ he should be more careful, but he’s been told those words a thousand times. his ma, his sister, friends, co-workers, lovers. you should be more careful. he nods a couple of times but his acceptance is hollow.  ❛ i cleaned up a little in the bathroom, but... ❜ he looks down at himself, his shirt’s already stained but the fabric was dark enough to hide it. he’d hold the careless caricature he sees in the reflection of the window for a couple of weeks. cuts heal, bruises fade. nothing was broken --- that he knows of.

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biggerdrake.

||omcrta

             “Hey hey hey! Hands are up– hands are up!                 That means ‘no more punching’, ‘kay?”

            he calls the dogs off, hands up before he staggers a couple of steps back.  ❛ sorry, sorry---- ❜ the thick fabric of his glove, on the back of his wrist serves purpose to wipe away the sweat pooling down his forehead.  ❛ you just make it too easy, it’s hard to know when you’ve really given up. ❜

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vorantjack.

@omcrta

“—You have no idea, Big Boy.” 

His eyes light up with manic glee. There’s certain skip to his step as he draws closer. The promise of violence so sweet  so  t e m p t i n g. “Ooh, but I can’t.” He pouted, a shrug in his shoulders. “I got business to do. I can’t let a handsome face like yours distract me.” 

              the dark glower soon faltered before disappearing completely. he still begrudgingly shifted back and forth on the words exchanged between them. hotheaded --- but donny usually claims he wasn’t looking for a fight.  it just happens.    ❛ yeah ----- your business as troubling as it sounds?? i just might have to do more than distract you. ❜

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i remade one of my older OCs if anyone is interested

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velociiti.

          she keeps herself poised, not wanting to give what’s inside away. as close as his guesses could be, they were all so far off. first cottage cheese, then sour cream. she could see how they’d both look similar to what it really was —- mayonnaise. brows raise & she keeps silent until he’s finished. it takes all she has to not laugh at him. she bites her inner lip hard to do just that —- even takes a long sip from her own mug just to be safe.  ❝ just the way you like it, baby ? ❞

                finished, conquered --- he just looks beaten. the cup slammed down on the table and he tried to clear his face of any green. he’d gag, but he had too much pride. it didn’t keep his stomach from lurching but he did his best to keep it all down out of spite.  ❛ best cup yet ... damn, where’d you learn to make that?? ❜ his face suddenly turns sour. shades of grief, but mostly tinges of frustration.  ❛ are you trying to kill me? ❜

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got a phone number from a guy i don’t know and we’re talking now but he mumbles so bad