Lina was lying face down on Lorna's bed, where she had been for the last 15 minutes. Lorna's room was quiet except for the soft keyboard and mouse clicks coming from the older sister's laptop—she was finishing up a basic dress pattern for Zel. She knew Lina wanted to say something, but that she would say it when she was ready.
“How did I get myself into this mess?”
Lorna glanced up. Lina had pulled her face out of Lorna's fluffy purple quilts and was staring in her general direction.
“What mess specifically are you referring to?”
“The one...with Francis. Mostly.”
Lorna just stared at her with her one visible eye.
“And Knox. And Dodge? I don't know.” Lina flopped back onto the bed, “Like. I want to be good friends with them AT LEAST. But I don't. Know how.”
She rolled over on her back, “But it's more complicated than that? Cause I mean Franny flirts with anyone who smiles pretty at him, and Knox isn't much better and on top of that I don't think he knows how to be sincere in anything. And of course Dodge flat out said “Nope” to the relationships thing which I totally understand cause I kinda feel that way too about all of them but then there's like, this thing where I get mad when Franny and Knox flit with other people too? Even though it's not like I DON'T.”
“You're jealous?”
Lina sat up, “Am NOT.”
Lorna just raised her eyebrow, not backing down an inch, “Really?”
“No. Maybe?” She sighed, “I don't know. I don't know fucking anything at this point.”
“But you like being around them.”
“Yeah,” Lina smiled just a bit, “I like being a part of people. Especially people who can match my wit—you know how tough that is.”
“Is it worth it?”
Lina went quiet for a moment, “I don't know?”
“Well what DO you know then. What are the facts?”
“Always the facts with you. Okay then sis.” Lina folded her arms, ticking off on her fingers, “Franny is suuuuper cute, Knox is one of the only people as clever as me I've found recently. I know that Franny...cares about me but hell I don't know what happened with Ed tonight when we weren't there but I'm pretty sure I don't like it. And last week I remember Knox and Queen and I...I just don't know. I shouldn't care but I DO but I DON'T WANT TO.”
“You've always been good at that last one.”
“You're one to talk.”
Lorna couldn't deny that one.
Lina flopped back down again, “Aaaaaaah Lorne I don't want to deal with this. Emotions are stupid.”
“I know.”
Lina rolled over again, and muttered into the covers, “Well what do you think then?”
“Will being with ANY of them lead to anything good?”
Silence.
A lot of silence.
Lorna looked back at her screen. Not because she was being heartless, but because there wasn't any point to staring at the back of her sister's head.
And then, finally, a single, strangled, half-sob half-whisper, “No.” Which promptly dissolved into quiet, muffled sniffles.
Lorna sighed and set her laptop aside, padding over to sit next to her sister. She didn't say anything else. There wasn't anything else to say. Lina had come to this realization all on her own.
After awhile Lina went silent, and Lorna got back up to type.
After a little longer, Lina rolled back over and stared at the ceiling, her eyes just as dead as they had always been.