Tumblr is Dead, Welcome to the Funeral

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

Y’all thought I was joking about deep-frying titties.

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

So let me get this straight

My post saying that tumblr allows people to post about meth is somehow more inappropriate than actual people doing meth

[hurlyburlywitch]

Tumblr’s porn purge is a fucking shambles.

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

Sign it here~ 

Disclaimer: I am running on caffeine and adderall, so this is probably not as funny to everybody else as it is to me

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

Thank you Tyler

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

That’s the spirit!

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

@censorbotoffical

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

It has come to my attention that I have left out some comments

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

When you’re too broke to afford Photoshop, so you make all your memes in PowerPoint

[nakkiehairydreadhead-deactivate]

Pixlr

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

Bold of you to assume I’m capable of figuring out anything more complicated than powerpoint

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

As somebody who has spent the last few days finding pictures of titties on the internet, I can confirm that while they’re fucking amazing, they also stop being inherently sexual after about an hour

You want to desexualize female breasts? Make them equal to male breasts? Just make them more common. Let women go shirtless. Post pictures of tits without any sexual context. Normalize it. Desensitize people. 

You know what a ban on female presenting nipples will do? Make them sexier. Labeling “female presenting nipples” as taboo just makes them more attractive. 

Alright, rant over. Back to the titties. 

[the-sociest-soc]

“Back to the titties” is my favourite sci-fi film I love tit travel

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

Okay you win this is funnier than anything I could ever write

[poinsciuri]

i dont really… WANT… to leave tumblr. ive been here since 2011

[poinsciuri]

no other platform has the right format for me to just randomly barf actual thoughts, joaks, and genuine creative content all in the same breath. i dont know how to compartmentalize

[rabnerd28]

every other platform you gotta be a real person. Here you are you’re icon and username and whatever your hyperfixation is at the current moment

[movedtobitchphobic]

on tumblr you can make a post that just says “minecraft” and get 50k notes, where on twitter you have to steal tweets and instagram you have to be hot. tumblr is more like a bunch of kids let loose in walmart where there are no rules and the only god is a bald swedish man

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

You’re telling me this bullshit is allowed on this hellscape, but not nipples

[324432463552434565435241354-dea]

us: remove porn bots please

staff: remove…. porn

us: n…o…. remove the porn BOTS.

staff: remove porn :)

[mchashimi]

Us: Please remove all pedophile blogs.

Staff: Remove………………ALL BLOGS??

Us: JUST THE PEDOPHILES, PLEASE DO SOMETHING ABOUT THE PEDOPHILES 

Staff: (☉‿☉) goodbye

[fantashic]

Us: if you’re going to ban everything at least don’t forget to ban the nazis

Staff: don’t…. ban nazis

Us: nonononono, that’s not what we said

Staff: don’t worry! We won’t ban nazis :D

[nitorisuggestions]

Us: Well, at least normal content should not get deleted or flagged.

Staff: normal content should get flagged or deleted?

Us: Do you know why were pissed that tumblr is not doing their jobs?

Staff: Tumblr is doing their jobs.

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

Us: So the algorithm thinks this picture of a three-legged cat is porn.

Staff: This picture... is porn.

Us: It’s a picture of a cat. You think this picture of a cat is porn.

Staff: Got it! This picture of a cat is porn! :DDD

[sheriff-haught-sauce]

Apple Store: So yeah, your site is a cesspool.

Tumblr: That is so sad Alexa seize their female presenting nipples.

[carugato]

us: all women are queens

staff: if she has female presenting nipples, she’s a tHOT

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

Sign it here~ 

Disclaimer: I am running on caffeine and adderall, so this is probably not as funny to everybody else as it is to me

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

Thank you Tyler

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

That’s the spirit!

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

@censorbotoffical

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

2018 is the year we start deep frying tits to hide them from the filter

[snappysprinkledog]

Step 1: don’t screw it up

Failed step 1

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

fixed it

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

As somebody who has spent the last few days finding pictures of titties on the internet, I can confirm that while they’re fucking amazing, they also stop being inherently sexual after about an hour

You want to desexualize female breasts? Make them equal to male breasts? Just make them more common. Let women go shirtless. Post pictures of tits without any sexual context. Normalize it. Desensitize people. 

You know what a ban on female presenting nipples will do? Make them sexier. Labeling “female presenting nipples” as taboo just makes them more attractive. 

Alright, rant over. Back to the titties. 

[staticonthesignal]

It’s legal to go topless in many parts of the US. Women just don’t do it.

[onlymalepresentingnipples]

Just because its legal doesn’t mean it’s socially accepted. A woman can legally go topless, yes. But if she does, she’s immediately judged for it. A woman going shirtless in public is treated like a slut or some sort of heathen. If I so much as bought a crop-top, I’m pretty sure my parents would disown me for showing my sinful belly button. 

Social pressures are much more powerful than legal ones. Allowing women to go shirtless goes way beyond just legality.