Burn the patriarchy

Homeade shitposts, made specially for you

[orexpa]

*to the tune of farmers insurance jingle*

I eat kneecaps

bababababababbabababam

[orexpa]

I don’t remeber posting this

[orexpa]

I want... waif.... wamen

[orexpa]

tried to write this yesterday, my hands were shaking too bad to fully spell it out.

So, I recently got braces on my teeth, and everything hurts so I’ve been eating nothing but jello. The place we get food at though is pretty cheap so they usually only have red jello.

Now, red dyes and yellow dyes inhance adhd to an extreme, add in a shit ton of sugar, and eat pretty much nothing but jello and chicken stock... bad things happen.

I guess the stimula kicked in around the evening, because I started to build a roomba out of a childrens unicorn robotics playset, coudn’t, got mad, drank some chocolate syrup, abandoned it, went to go try to draw, accidentally ripped the page, cryed a bit, then decided I wanted more jello.

So... our stove is kind of broken, so it really only has two levels of heat: off, or maximum heat. And, the pot I was using didn’t cover the whole burner. 

I don’t know if you see where I’m going with this.

I was very excited for this jello, and I ripped open the packet of power a bit to vigourusly, causing the powder to go everywhere- the pot next to it, the buttons on the stove, and on the very hot burner. 

In short- it went up in flames. Flames that smelled like Blue Rasperry. 

Luckily my dad was there to put out the flames.

[golgibodies]

just a reminder if you’re bored you can always answer some simple trivia and give rice to people in need.

and it’s absolutely free

http://freerice.com/

[ricco4]

We used to sit for hours in middle school and do this. That’s cool it’s still up and running.

[pinksthetics]

Yo i was just wondering the other day if this is still a thing

[franscribe]

Has an app. A bunch of categories and difficult levels. I just searched ‘UN freerice’ in the Play store. You can also make groups to compete with friends 😊

[worldsingers]

Reminder that FreeRice operates on ad revenue! If you are using the website, make sure your adblockers are disabled, or no revenue will be generated from your answered questions!

Here are the two URLs linked in that screenshot:

World Food Programme

Learn more about how the WFP is funded

[actualrulerofdead]

If you’re a person who enjoys trivia and has limited funds, this is a wonderful way to help. 

It might be small, but every grain helps!

[derpzones-deactivated20211030]

I’ve tried this before, it was super fun!

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

[orexpa]

I THOUGHT THE SPINES ON THE PINOCONE WERE TEETH AND I ALSMOST FELL OUT OF MY CHAIR

[12lotus]

I don’t think people realise how easy it is to feel ugly when you’re South East Asian.

I know so many popular East Asian bloggers, who always get so many notes because of how elegant and refined and. Pale. They are. Those are standards most of us can never achieve. I’ve never seen a selfie set of a southeast Asian girl break 1k: but I’ve seen plenty, and I mean plenty of pale East Asians break 3k easy.

I know East Asian bloggers who go on about racism against East Asians and act like it’s universal. I know some who will talk about East Asian racism but never breathe a word about racism against southeast Asians.

I know East Asian bloggers who literally don’t follow any South East Asians. The ones who say that it doesn’t matter because “we’re all East Asian!” Technically. Or those who act like we’re a different breed and a different species.

I wonder if most East Asians know that their beauty standards get passed down to our countries. I wonder if they know how it hurts a lot of us.

So I’m giving a shoutout to every southeast Asian girl. Every one of you,if us, deserves to feel pretty.

I’m talking about the Indonesian gals with broad noses. The Malay girls who wear Tudung and are mocked. Chinese Singaporeans who are still not “Chinese enough” for mainlanders. Filipino girls who feel guilty about their curly or frizzy hair. Indian Singaporeans who are feel like they need to be pale to be worth something ( you don’t). Thai girls who are told their country is only good for farming rice. Myanmar girls who get asked mockingly if they’re domestic workers. Even if you are, there is no shame in that. Every Cambodian girl who felt bad about having thick lips. I know I left a lot of people out, and I’m sorry. But if you’re reading this and haven’t seen yourself here - you are just as worthy and my spirit and strength and good wishes are with you

You are all beautiful. Every single one of you. We are all beautiful. It’s hard to see it and it’s hard to feel it sometimes but we are. You are. Every one of you. Pride to our people!

[12lotus]

I have never seen a proper positivity post for southeast Asian girls by a southeast Asian girl so could you please reblog this? I want any southeast Asian girl seeing this to know I love them

[peachykopii]

^

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i feel so bad someone tried to get my ko-fi goal to exactly 69% but i’m a cheap bitch who won’t pay for the upgrade service and u can only donate even numbers. 

there is nothing sadder than a 68 that can never fulfill its potential

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

Someone explained to me, a math major, that i just have to set the goal to 200, I am a FOOL and a BUFFOON

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

all! most! there!!!

(to clarify, these are bears as in the animal, not hairless hairy men)

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

exactly $26 (and not a dollar more) is needed to bring this to 69% and i am going to go absolutely feral if anyone of you fucks this up for me

[so-lovelee]

… Gaud you’re not gonna like what i’m about to tell you…

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

TUMBLR YOU HAD ONE FUCKING JOB

[taz80390]

Time to increase goal so we can try again!

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

FUCK YOU I’M GONNA

[shaaknaa]

It’s gonna have to be $400 with the even dollars

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

I’LL FUCKEN DO IT BITCH. YOU DUG A HOLE IN A SANDBOX WITHOUT REALIZING YOU WERE DIGGING YOUR OWN GRAVE

[lovelyflowerlov-deactivated2020]

I’m sorry but I’m so lost what does 69 mean

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

…it’s a metaphor for the concept of dualism and a perfect universal balance

[orexpa]

Kidnapper: I have your sister! Give me all your money, and I'll give her back!

Eliza: ...You have Angelica..?

Kidnapper: Yes! Now give me money!

Eliza: *laughs*

Kidnapper: ???

Eliza: You don't have her, she has you. Good luck, fucker *hangs up*

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

good morning tumblr. something truly atrocious has appeared in my inbox (porpoise with human skin). for $7 i will refrain from posting this atrocity. you have 24 hours. yes this is a hostage situation

[renum-crimsonvale]

Can we pay money to have you post it anyways?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

$12 and you have to promise to cry afterwards

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

thank you Tumblr for encouraging my creative pursuits!!!

Keep reading

[gertritude-art]

the only two ways i can categorize height is if i see something tall i go 'woah, big boy man' and if i see something short i go 'hah.. baby man' and idk what to blame for this. anyway wanna hear about the times ghosts have touched my ass

[everythingfox]

(via)

[derpzones-deactivated20211030]

If we could just... divide my follower count between my blogs, that would be great

[dkpsyhog]

Wait why do you have so few followers???

[derpzones-deactivated20211030]

[one-time-i-dreamt]

Not a dream

I am going to have to have all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed 😭😭😭 and due to the details of my situation, I have to get it done at a private dental clinic and the prices are 💀 I don't know what I'm going to do

[orexpa]

Me over here with a genetic muttation preventing me from having wisdom teeth in the first place-

[orexpa]

I have a wattpad! I’m shit at writing, but one exists! Yes! You should! Go! Look at it!  Heres the link! I’ll be posting a part one to a story I’m working on fairly soon!

[orexpa]

“Give me an F!”

“F”

“give me a u!”

“U!”

“give me a c!”

“c!”

FUCK THE PATRIARCHY!

[thebulletinhamilton-quotes]

Hey guys, I have a favor to ask....

Does any of you have Harry Potter or Hamilton OC’s??? (Original Character)

If so, please reblog this post with a: OUI OUI IM THE BAGGUETTE YOU SEE. (If I can get a few, characters, that would be great. If not, the character Earl Grey will be fun writing at least...) I’m having trouble coming up with some subplots and (no, your OC will not be killed off. No one is going to die....just maybe the main characters? I don’t know, I haven’t decided.) I want to interact with ya’ll more cause....I like you a lot.

If you don’t want to, that’s fine. No worries. Thank you for your patience. I’m back (ish).

Also yes, writing requests are still open. They’ll be answered....soon. I’m currently getting on a “normal” sleep schedule again so cheers to that.

[orexpa]

yeha uhhhh idk how to change font but I have a hamilton oc here a brief escrption

Helen Charpentier

Female

born: 1775

age as of hamilton death: 29

appearance: Chestnut hair, green eyes, porcelein skin. 

Husband died shortly after they were wed, she was left with a fortune and a mansion, and stayed in “mourning” for several years after his death to uphold social stardards. Also had an affair w/ her best friend while he was alive as well as aafter cause she be hella gay-

[orexpa]

I can always tell when its past midnight and I’m awake cause I’ll be painting or whatever and my thoughts drift from the normal track of stuff to violently inrtrusive, slightly disturbing thoughts. For example, last night I was making macaroni and cheese and just vibing yknow and suddenly I just thought, “cheraded skinjuice” and look idk but I think telling the time of day just by the violency of ones thoughts is a better power than whatever superman shit hollywood can conjure up ok