Memory Is A Strange Thing ...

... memory is a strange thing

[oschvank]

#OSCHVANK ─── ⋆⋅ this is an rp blog & a CANON DIVERGENT interpretation of NELLIEL TU ODERSCHVANK  from Tite Kubo's Bleach . a study on memory , grief , bonds , and judgment. please read rules below before interacting ! low activity . est time zone . composed by esme

HEADCANONS , VERSE , MY EDITS

BLOG. the main and defaulted verse on this blog is a canon divergent nelliel where she remains in aizens army despite sustaining the attack received from nnoitra. in this verse, she never lost her complete memory or reverted into a child. this verse focuses on the ‘ what if ’ she never left , the changes in her life , her interactions, and in her personality.

NOTICE. i’ve yet to read the events in the TYBW . if your muse is from this arc and/or has developing changes , then i am not aware of them . if we were to interact , i will of course do my research , but know that i will not have general details or plot in mind .

SHIPPING. romantic shipping is of low priority when writing nelliel . please do not approach us with the sole intention of romantic ships . i will hard block any attempts of forced chemistry . if something does occur between our muse , i’d much prefer it if we’re friends and talk it through .

i am open to pre-established relationships, given we talk about it to some extent.

FOLLOWING. i am highly selective and private about who i follow. i've come to realize that i like having a small group of people on my dashboard that i can pay attention to rather than a lot. it can get overwhelming at times and i don't do well in those situations. in order to understand and keep my dashboard uncluttered though, i may unfollow after some time if i don't feel comfortable or if the vibe seems off. i apologize if it comes across as a personal thing

i generally don't care much about aesthetic blogs, and i'm a bit iffy with multi-muse blogs. i'm pretty chill with oc's so long as there's an about page. lastly, please have a rules page up / 18+ only

DRAMA. no drama . there’s enough of it in real life , i don’t need to see it on my dash . this is my safe space and will thus unfollow / soft block anyone who constantly has drama going on . in the chance of concerning callout posts , i will conduct my own investigation and decide what to do from thereon .

MUN. thank you for reading this far . my name is esme. i go by she / her pronouns and am twenty-six yrs old .

[oschvank]

new update holds me accountable for the number of posts in my drafts I see...

[shirohakune]

tried doing something more simple, experimenting with styles and such

[skatik]

Nelliel Tu Odelschwanck

[oschvank]

∗ 54﹕ sender needs receiver’s help getting in the bath . The way he's broken, snapped metal. His limits met and exceeded, leaving a husk of a body. But it's still him beneath it all and he needs her, again.

𝟏𝟎𝟎 𝑵𝑶𝑵𝑽𝑬𝑹𝑩𝑨𝑳 𝑷𝑹𝑶𝑴𝑷𝑻𝑺 / @burdenedreverence

Nelliel seldom lets Haydens business cloud her thoughts. He has his own path, and she has hers. To force him to walk the easy path of flowing rivers and fruits flourishing at every step didn't quite suite the man who so ardently persists to take the parched desert if it meant giving that path to another.

But the way he is now... it's hard seeing him like this again and again. She wonders if he knows that, or if all he knows is the placid face she so often gave him in the many years they grown to know each other. Does he know she sometimes zones out in the middle of her day, wondering if he's rested for the day? Ate for the day? Laughed for the day? He gives his all to the world, and in return Nelliel receives the worn down, sometimes broken remnants that comes back with it. A shell of someone she has to squint to recognize. Beneath all the rust and worn metal, though, she's learned to restore its functions time and time again.

When she finally sets him in the bathtub, Nelliel ties her hair up in a ponytail and starts cleaning off the grime from his face. Slowly, the man she recognizes comes to. His stumble is prickly; it's been days since he's been out. His sun kissed skin has become darker which make his scars stand out, too. And then his eyes. Often emerald, but currently deep like the forest. The bathroom light reflect on it for just a second and Nelliel smiles. Like a mechanic breathing back life into its adored creation, she leans in and presses a kiss to his temple, then his cheek, and then a chaste one on his lips.

But he is more than heaps of metal. More than a soldier following orders. She just wished he believed that, too.

"I'll need you to take up defense classes again, Hayden. Brute strength can't solve everything. That's called recklessness." Then she begins to wash his hair, massaging his scalp ever so softly. "I can ask Hallibel to have a sparring session with you and I've already requested Kisuke for defensive charms and gadgets that'll help."

After all these years, Nelliel still couldn't quite tell to him to stop what he deemed important. But along her own route, she's learned to take some water and some fruit, so that when their paths did cross in moments like these, she'd be ready to offer those provisions to the parched man who took the desert trail ahead if it meant forsaking someones fate from such suffering.

[oschvank]

[derekscorner]

[oschvank]

[oschvank]

∗ o2﹕ sender offers receiver a bite from their fork . (Except there is no fork; Zangetsu is offering her a bite of Hollow. His prey)

𝟏𝟎𝟎 𝑵𝑶𝑵𝑽𝑬𝑹𝑩𝑨𝑳 𝑷𝑹𝑶𝑴𝑷𝑻𝑺

Since her metamorphosis into an arrancar, Nelliel seldom found the need to eat other hollows to fill the emptiness she once felt, or the desperation to survive. It was a trait she grew to adore in her current state — a trait she deemed worth to fight for.

The other was a hollow through and through, though some of his traits and mannerisms made it difficult to correctly categorize him. He had intellect much like an Adjuchas. But Adjuchas were crazed with hunger to avoid regression and he didn't seem like the type to worry about regression. He wasn't an arrancar, either. If anything, he resembled a Vasto Lorde which only brought about another flurry of questions.

Attempting to categorize him was an unavoidable itch she wanted to figure out ever since she met him, but she knew the deeper she thought about it, the worse the crack on her skull would feel. So she blinked it away in favor of accepting what was in front of her.

His offer amuses her and she shakes her head. "You can have it all. But if you come across an Arrancar with light blue hair and a terrible attitude, don't offer him any unless you want it all gone."

[icybreaths]

𐃆 @oschvank ˚❅｡ ｡｡｡

The joy on Nelliel's face gave Jewel a brief pause.

Nell's smile lit her features, soft and bright as a fair spring breeze. Relieving too, maybe? Soul Society was a foreign realm, home to exceedingly few Arrancars, so a familiar face must have gone a long way. A comforting glimpse within a sea of unknowns...

Jewel appeared at her side with a Shunpo, gummed out grin glinting in the light.

"Hey, ain' no Shini's over here givin' you any problems is there? I'll eat 'em~"

[oschvank]

"Oh? Is that so? I can think of a few that'll make these meeting go by faster." She smiles to show jest, but soon offers a genuine one when she regards Jewel. "Aside from the drawn out affairs, I'm doing well. The politics here are more, how do I say... well, it's night and day compared to Hueco Mundo." Quite literally.

"I can only hope to ascertain a level of structure there. Maybe even better ones..." she muses, heading toward the exit. "How have you been, Jewel? Are you on duty today?"

[oschvank]

∗ 15﹕ sender  and  receiver  make  eye  contact  across  a  busy  room .

𝟏𝟎𝟎 𝑵𝑶𝑵𝑽𝑬𝑹𝑩𝑨𝑳 𝑷𝑹𝑶𝑴𝑷𝑻𝑺

Having finished with the first of many meetings with Seireitie regarding the restoration of Hueco Mundo, Nelliel spots Jewel across the room. It's the first time she'd seen her in the light of Seireitei and she couldn't help but notice how pretty her hair glistened under the light. Like a soft blush of cherry blossom petals. Catching her gaze, lashes upturn into soft crescents, happy to see a familiar face amongst many foreign ones.

[derekscorner]

[odyysee]

[oschvank]

“ —I miss the green in your hair. ”

Blinks at the Shinigami... It's still green though?

[ohisms]

𝟏𝟎𝟎 𝑵𝑶𝑵𝑽𝑬𝑹𝑩𝑨𝑳 𝑷𝑹𝑶𝑴𝑷𝑻𝑺 .    (  a  collection  of  100  nonverbal  action  prompts .   mature  and  potentially  triggering  themes  are  present .   add  “ + reverse ”  to  swap  assigned  roles . )

∗ o1﹕ sender  tucks  hair  out  of  receiver’s  face . ∗ o2﹕ sender  offers  receiver  a  bite  from  their  fork . ∗ o3﹕ sender  places  their  feet / legs  in  receiver's  lap . ∗ o4﹕ sender  offers  receiver  an  earbud  to  share  their  music . ∗ o5﹕ sender  comforts  receiver  in  the  aftermath  of  a  nightmare . ∗ o6﹕ sender  gives  receiver  company  in  the  hospital . ∗ o7﹕ sender  wraps  their  arms  around  a  hysterical  receiver  to  calm  them . ∗ o8﹕ sender  shows  up  at  receiver’s  home  late  at  night . ∗ o9﹕ sender  falls  asleep  leaning  against  receiver . ∗ 1o﹕ sender  wields  a  [ gun / knife ]  at  receiver . ∗ 11﹕ sender  runs  their  fingers  through  receiver’s  hair . ∗ 12﹕ sender  invites  receiver  to  dance . ∗ 13﹕ sender  takes  a  [ picture / video ]  of  receiver . ∗ 14﹕ sender  places  their  head  in  receiver’s  lap . ∗ 15﹕ sender  and  receiver  make  eye  contact  across  a  busy  room . ∗ 16﹕ sender  pushes  receiver  against  a  wall  to  kiss  them . ∗ 17﹕ sender  and  receiver  cook  together . ∗ 18﹕ sender  comes  to  receiver  after  being  injured . ∗ 19﹕ sender  sits  in  receiver’s  lap . ∗ 2o﹕ sender  lifts  receiver's  chin ,  invoking  eye  contact . ∗ 21﹕ sender  overtakes  receiver  in  combat . ∗ 22﹕ sender  finds  receiver  [ injured / bloodied ] . ∗ 23﹕ sender  straightens  an  article  of  receiver’s  clothes . ∗ 24﹕ sender  crawls  into  bed  with  receiver . ∗ 25﹕ sender  rolls  their  eyes  at  receiver . ∗ 26﹕ sender  lights  receiver’s  [ cigarette / joint ] . ∗ 27﹕ sender  is  caught  wearing  receiver's  clothes . ∗ 28﹕ sender  strikes  receiver  with  a  pillow . ∗ 29﹕ sender  writes  a  note  on  receiver’s  skin :  [ note ] . ∗ 3o﹕ sender  wraps  a  blanket  around  receiver’s  shoulders . ∗ 31﹕ sender  runs  and  jumps  into  receiver’s  arms . ∗ 32﹕ sender  shoves  receiver  out  of  anger . ∗ 33﹕ sender  hovers  over  receiver’s  shoulder  as  they  complete  a  task . ∗ 34﹕ sender  is  found  by  receiver  somewhere  they  shouldn’t  be . ∗ 35﹕ sender  curls  up  against  receiver  in  their  sleep . ∗ 36﹕ sender  is  found  drunk  by  receiver . ∗ 37﹕ sender  throws  an  item  of  sentiment  bitterly  at  receiver . ∗ 38﹕ sender  joins  receiver  in  the  shower . ∗ 39﹕ sender  is  caught  following  receiver . ∗ 4o﹕ sender  traces  one  of  receiver’s  [ scars / bruises ] . ∗ 41﹕ sender  twines  their  fingers  with  receiver’s . ∗ 42﹕ sender  barges  into  receiver’s  home  unannounced . ∗ 43﹕ sender  kicks  receiver’s  shin  beneath  a  table . ∗ 44﹕ sender  aggressively  shoves  past  receiver . ∗ 45﹕ sender  kisses  receiver’s  [ forehead / cheek ] . ∗ 46﹕ sender  pulls  receiver  out  of  harm’s  way . ∗ 47﹕ sender  is  found  sobbing  by  receiver . ∗ 48﹕ sender  locks  receiver  out  of  their  room . ∗ 49﹕ sender  brings  receiver  [ coffee / tea ]  in  the  morning . ∗ 5o﹕ sender  rests  their  forehead  against  receiver’s . ∗ 51﹕ sender  plays  a  song  for  receiver  that  reminds  them  of  them :  [ song ] . ∗ 52﹕ sender  takes  a  [ punch / stab / bullet ]  meant  for  receiver . ∗ 53﹕ sender  buys  receiver  a  drink  at  a  bar . ∗ 54﹕ sender  needs  receiver’s  help  getting  in  the  bath . ∗ 55﹕ sender  and  receiver  cross  paths  in  the  kitchen  late  at  night . ∗ 56﹕ sender  twists  receiver’s  arm  behind  their  back . ∗ 57﹕ sender  winks  at  receiver . ∗ 58﹕ sender  is  found  collapsed  by  receiver . ∗ 59﹕ sender  prevents  an  injured  receiver  from  getting  up . ∗ 6o﹕ sender  claps  a  hand  over  receiver’s  mouth  to  silence  them . ∗ 61﹕ sender  cages  receiver  against  a  [ wall / the floor ]  with  their  arms . ∗ 62﹕ sender  storms  away  from  receiver  during  an  argument . ∗ 63﹕ sender  is  found  by  receiver  sleeping  in  receiver’s  bed . ∗ 64﹕ sender  [ applies / touches up ]  receiver’s  makeup . ∗ 65﹕ sender  throws  receiver  into  a  wall  during  combat . ∗ 66﹕ sender  dances  sensually  with  receiver . ∗ 67﹕ sender  strikes  receiver  across  the  face . ∗ 68﹕ sender  places  their  hand  on  receiver’s  leg  while  driving . ∗ 69﹕ sender  pulls  a  chair  out  from  under  receiver . ∗ 7o﹕ sender  catches  receiver’s  wrist  when  they  turn  to  leave . ∗ 71﹕ sender  leaves  an  intimate  mark  on  receiver . ∗ 72﹕ sender  beats  receiver  in  a  video  game . ∗ 73﹕ sender  and  receiver  stand  in  stunned  silence  after  a  fight . ∗ 74﹕ sender  cares  for  receiver  while  they’re  sick . ∗ 75﹕ sender  and  receiver  go  on  a  hike . ∗ 76﹕ sender  is  caught  snooping  in  receiver’s  things . ∗ 77﹕ sender  and  receiver  cuddle  while  watching  television . ∗ 78﹕ sender  throws  something  aggressively  at  receiver . ∗ 79﹕ sender  creeps  up  behind  receiver  to  scare  them . ∗ 8o﹕ sender  and  receiver  go  shopping  together . ∗ 81﹕ sender  helps  receiver  [ dye / style ]  their  hair . ∗ 82﹕ sender  draws  receiver  into  a  kiss  by  the  back  of  their  neck . ∗ 83﹕ sender  is  discovered  having  a  panic  attack  by  receiver . ∗ 84﹕ sender  accidentally  injures  receiver  during  sparring . ∗ 85﹕ sender  grabs  receiver  roughly  by  the  hair . ∗ 86﹕ sender  brings  receiver  to  their  knees  during  combat . ∗ 87﹕ sender  shows  receiver  evidence  of  a  lie  they  told . ∗ 88﹕ sender  winks  [ seductively / mockingly ]  at  receiver . ∗ 89﹕ sender  yells  at  receiver  to  put  their  hands  in  the  air . ∗ 9o﹕ sender  helps  receiver  patch  up  a  wound . ∗ 91﹕ sender  holds  receiver  as  they  cry . ∗ 92﹕ sender  silently  and  angrily  points  receiver  towards  the  door . ∗ 93﹕ sender  gestures  for  receiver  to  sit  down . ∗ 94﹕ sender  pulls  receiver  into  their  lap . ∗ 95﹕ sender  cradles  receiver’s  face . ∗ 96﹕ sender  tackles  receiver  out  of  the  way  of  danger . ∗ 97﹕ sender  has  hidden  an  injury  from  receiver ,  and  receiver  finds  out . ∗ 98﹕ sender  confronts  receiver  about  their  unhealthy  behavior . ∗ 99﹕ sender  proposes  to  receiver . ∗ 1oo﹕ sender  has  just  died ,  receiver  finds  out .

[oschvank]

oh snap, nelliel is calling to me. i've been getting pretty sad in my other blog so i might decide to be on here for a while.

[derekscorner]