The Osha-Vent Monster

The Teal is secure

[osha-employee-one]

Maybe it got up and walked away? It happened to a guy I knew once

-Daniel

My house doesn’t have legs unfortunately, no room to store them, we don’t have basements in Texas. Usually

[evil-osha]

other oshaverse blogs: im gonna build up a great rp environment and rp lots and stuff

me: im going to log on every 7 days make like 5 posts answer like 5 asks and then leave to hibernate again

[osha-vent-daniel]

Haha where did one go?

[oshalorefinders]

I recall seeing a chart out there about how all these different osha accounts came to be after the fall of the orignal-do you have anything similar?

I do not, no. And I'm too lazy to make one--

[chaososha]

EVERYONE! REBLOG THE DATE AND TIME OF YOUR FIRST POST IF ABLE! WE NEED TO MAKE THIS!

9/9/21 7:28pm

[mythology-osha]

10/3/21 10:00pm

[inventorosha]

10/2/21 4:50pm

[runaway-osha]

9/26/21 11:17pm

[official-osha]

8/31/idk

[osha-employee-one]

9/4/21

[osha-vent-daniel]

9/23/21

[osha-vent-daniel]

Heya @osha-employee-one sorry for the wait, but I think I might have found something regarding those papers we discussed! Its a bit hard to make out some of the words through the secretions, but it's mostly legible! If you'd like I could try and slip it through the vent cover so you can see for yourself?

[osha-employee-one]

Mx Vent Creature,

Sure— Slide the paper through the vent in my office and I will get to it when I get back into my office later today. I’ll ensure it’s real and not fabricated then, and we can proceed from there.

One

[osha-vent-daniel]

Glad to hear! I'll just slip it here aaaaaand- there! That should do it, let me know if there's anything else I should look out for!

[osha-employee-one]

Mx Vent Creature,

I’m having a hard time reading this? I don’t feel like you’re lying, though, so I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to let you out… But you have to OSHA swear you won’t do anything to make me regret this decision. Because then I’ll have to amend the problem I caused. We don’t want that, alright?

There, the cover should be off now… Don’t get any vest dust in my office, preferably! I think I’m the only person in my sector today and I have no idea where the custodial closets are— not that I’d be allowed to use anything inside, anyway…

One

[osha-vent-daniel]

I OSHA-Pinkie Promise not to cause any trouble for anything that isn't a rat or cockroach! I'll be sure to clean up any messes I cause too, I'm practically house trained already! Thanks for help, One!

Y'know, this place isn't too bad.. maybe I should actually work here? Then I won't have to relocate my nest and all- Hey, do you know if this sector is hiring, by any chance?

[osha-employee-one]

Uhm…

You’re— Welcome.

I don’t know if we’re hiring. I’m the only person who shows up now, I think I might be the only person left. But you have a nest here? That can’t be safe? What is it made out of and where is it?

Practically house trained?? If you pee on the floor I am putting you back in the vents.

[osha-vent-daniel]

Oh don't worry about that, the nest is only made of loose papers I've found around around the place, and it's just somewhere in the vents, so its not even accessible to normal people!

If it helps though, I could put up a sign?

[osha-employee-one]

I just worry it may block air-flow…

…

Why not move it to an office for the time being? I’m the only person left right now, so I think that’d make me in charge. You can have the office across from mine!

[osha-vent-daniel]

Hmmm, that doesn't sound like a bad idea! Less cramped, no more rats... Yeah, I think I will! I'll go and start moving things over, oh I'm so excited!

*saying this, he scrambles back into the vents and disappears from sight*

[osha-vent-daniel]

Heya @osha-employee-one sorry for the wait, but I think I might have found something regarding those papers we discussed! Its a bit hard to make out some of the words through the secretions, but it's mostly legible! If you'd like I could try and slip it through the vent cover so you can see for yourself?

[osha-employee-one]

Mx Vent Creature,

Sure— Slide the paper through the vent in my office and I will get to it when I get back into my office later today. I’ll ensure it’s real and not fabricated then, and we can proceed from there.

One

[osha-vent-daniel]

Glad to hear! I'll just slip it here aaaaaand- there! That should do it, let me know if there's anything else I should look out for!

[osha-employee-one]

Mx Vent Creature,

I’m having a hard time reading this? I don’t feel like you’re lying, though, so I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to let you out… But you have to OSHA swear you won’t do anything to make me regret this decision. Because then I’ll have to amend the problem I caused. We don’t want that, alright?

There, the cover should be off now… Don’t get any vest dust in my office, preferably! I think I’m the only person in my sector today and I have no idea where the custodial closets are— not that I’d be allowed to use anything inside, anyway…

One

[osha-vent-daniel]

I OSHA-Pinkie Promise not to cause any trouble for anything that isn't a rat or cockroach! I'll be sure to clean up any messes I cause too, I'm practically house trained already! Thanks for help, One!

Y'know, this place isn't too bad.. maybe I should actually work here? Then I won't have to relocate my nest and all- Hey, do you know if this sector is hiring, by any chance?

[osha-employee-one]

Uhm…

You’re— Welcome.

I don’t know if we’re hiring. I’m the only person who shows up now, I think I might be the only person left. But you have a nest here? That can’t be safe? What is it made out of and where is it?

Practically house trained?? If you pee on the floor I am putting you back in the vents.

[osha-vent-daniel]

Oh don't worry about that, the nest is only made of loose papers I've found around around the place, and it's just somewhere in the vents, so its not even accessible to normal people!

If it helps though, I could put up a sign?

[osha-vent-daniel]

Heya @osha-employee-one sorry for the wait, but I think I might have found something regarding those papers we discussed! Its a bit hard to make out some of the words through the secretions, but it's mostly legible! If you'd like I could try and slip it through the vent cover so you can see for yourself?

[osha-employee-one]

Mx Vent Creature,

Sure— Slide the paper through the vent in my office and I will get to it when I get back into my office later today. I’ll ensure it’s real and not fabricated then, and we can proceed from there.

One

[osha-vent-daniel]

Glad to hear! I'll just slip it here aaaaaand- there! That should do it, let me know if there's anything else I should look out for!

[osha-employee-one]

Mx Vent Creature,

I’m having a hard time reading this? I don’t feel like you’re lying, though, so I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to let you out… But you have to OSHA swear you won’t do anything to make me regret this decision. Because then I’ll have to amend the problem I caused. We don’t want that, alright?

There, the cover should be off now… Don’t get any vest dust in my office, preferably! I think I’m the only person in my sector today and I have no idea where the custodial closets are— not that I’d be allowed to use anything inside, anyway…

One

[osha-vent-daniel]

I OSHA-Pinkie Promise not to cause any trouble for anything that isn't a rat or cockroach! I'll be sure to clean up any messes I cause too, I'm practically house trained already! Thanks for help, One!

Y'know, this place isn't too bad.. maybe I should actually work here? Then I won't have to relocate my nest and all- Hey, do you know if this sector is hiring, by any chance?

[osha-vent-daniel]

Heya @osha-employee-one sorry for the wait, but I think I might have found something regarding those papers we discussed! Its a bit hard to make out some of the words through the secretions, but it's mostly legible! If you'd like I could try and slip it through the vent cover so you can see for yourself?

[osha-employee-one]

Mx Vent Creature,

Sure— Slide the paper through the vent in my office and I will get to it when I get back into my office later today. I’ll ensure it’s real and not fabricated then, and we can proceed from there.

One

[osha-vent-daniel]

Glad to hear! I'll just slip it here aaaaaand- there! That should do it, let me know if there's anything else I should look out for!

[osha-vent-daniel]

Heya @osha-employee-one sorry for the wait, but I think I might have found something regarding those papers we discussed! Its a bit hard to make out some of the words through the secretions, but it's mostly legible! If you'd like I could try and slip it through the vent cover so you can see for yourself?

[osha-employee-one]

Hey do you know whats for lunch today? I haven't been able to get a good look since they sealed the vents

-Daniel

Mx (Mr) Daniel,

Why are you in the vents. Aren't you supposed to be in a containment centre? My sector doesn’t serve lunches anymore due to low staff in both parties (we all bring our own food or order food now), so I also think you may be in the wrong sector. Try the sector East from here, it’s a few cities away but I’m sure you know how to get there the OSHA way.

On an unrelated note, please send me your previous/current supervisor's contact information.

One

[osha-vent-daniel]

Containment centre? Ohh is THAT why those people in the suits came by? Nah they uh, let me off with a warning or something.

I live in these vents, but like I mentioned They've been sealed so I don't think I can leave if I wanted to. If you could contact someone about that I might be able to slip out of here? I doubt I can get you in contact with my supervisors though; I don't remember who they are! Thanks for the tips about the sectors though, I havent had anything that wasnt a raw rat in a while.

[osha-employee-one]

Mx Daniel,

I don’t know if I’m allowed to help you. I have no supervisor to report to about this and I am unsure how to proceed. Why were the vents even sealed? I thought it had felt hotter in my office, but I assumed it was just because I turned off my fan.

I could let you out of the vents myself, I’m strong enough to rip the covers off, but I was warned not to let anything out of the vents if anything asks me— by multiple people. I don’t know what the Bio-Chemists were up to now, but I know they’re behind some of these... Recent mishaps. So we don’t have them anymore. I can’t ask them to even clarify if you’re safe because we just don’t have them in my sector anymore.

Please try to locate approved paperwork that I’m allowed to help you out of the vents. Otherwise I’m afraid my hands are tied.

One

[osha-vent-daniel]

Hm, well this certainly is a predicament...

Well, the vents were sealed because of a threat from a homicidal A.I., I know that for certain at least. As for locating paperwork, I'm at a loss. I could check my bedding for loose files, but if that doesn't work then I'm not sure what I could do..

You were told not to let anything out of the vents, but did anyone say anything about putting things in them? If I'm not able to leave, could you perhaps bring me some food instead?

[osha-employee-one]

Mx Daniel,

That sounds about right for a standard day here.

I have uncrustable sandwiches in my office’s mini-fridge? And also a lot of leftover Monster Energy from whoever replaced my water bottles with the stuff. I supposed I could temporarily open the vents to slide you in some food, but I’d have to close it back right after. No funny business from you, either.

If that works well for you, give me about twenty minutes. It’s hard to unscrew the vent covers without putting pressure on my leg, I’m still technically not supposed to be walking yet!

One

[osha-vent-daniel]

Righty-O, sounds good! I'll look for that paperwork while you do, and no shady business from me! Monster's honor! Thanks for the help, and I hope you get well soon.

[osha-employee-one]

Hey do you know whats for lunch today? I haven't been able to get a good look since they sealed the vents

-Daniel

Mx (Mr) Daniel,

Why are you in the vents. Aren't you supposed to be in a containment centre? My sector doesn’t serve lunches anymore due to low staff in both parties (we all bring our own food or order food now), so I also think you may be in the wrong sector. Try the sector East from here, it’s a few cities away but I’m sure you know how to get there the OSHA way.

On an unrelated note, please send me your previous/current supervisor's contact information.

One

[osha-vent-daniel]

Containment centre? Ohh is THAT why those people in the suits came by? Nah they uh, let me off with a warning or something.

I live in these vents, but like I mentioned They've been sealed so I don't think I can leave if I wanted to. If you could contact someone about that I might be able to slip out of here? I doubt I can get you in contact with my supervisors though; I don't remember who they are! Thanks for the tips about the sectors though, I havent had anything that wasnt a raw rat in a while.

[osha-employee-one]

Mx Daniel,

I don’t know if I’m allowed to help you. I have no supervisor to report to about this and I am unsure how to proceed. Why were the vents even sealed? I thought it had felt hotter in my office, but I assumed it was just because I turned off my fan.

I could let you out of the vents myself, I’m strong enough to rip the covers off, but I was warned not to let anything out of the vents if anything asks me— by multiple people. I don’t know what the Bio-Chemists were up to now, but I know they’re behind some of these... Recent mishaps. So we don’t have them anymore. I can’t ask them to even clarify if you’re safe because we just don’t have them in my sector anymore.

Please try to locate approved paperwork that I’m allowed to help you out of the vents. Otherwise I’m afraid my hands are tied.

One

[osha-vent-daniel]

Hm, well this certainly is a predicament...

Well, the vents were sealed because of a threat from a homicidal A.I., I know that for certain at least. As for locating paperwork, I'm at a loss. I could check my bedding for loose files, but if that doesn't work then I'm not sure what I could do..

You were told not to let anything out of the vents, but did anyone say anything about putting things in them? If I'm not able to leave, could you perhaps bring me some food instead?

[osha-employee-one]

Hey do you know whats for lunch today? I haven't been able to get a good look since they sealed the vents

-Daniel

Mx (Mr) Daniel,

Why are you in the vents. Aren't you supposed to be in a containment centre? My sector doesn’t serve lunches anymore due to low staff in both parties (we all bring our own food or order food now), so I also think you may be in the wrong sector. Try the sector East from here, it’s a few cities away but I’m sure you know how to get there the OSHA way.

On an unrelated note, please send me your previous/current supervisor's contact information.

One

[osha-vent-daniel]

Containment centre? Ohh is THAT why those people in the suits came by? Nah they uh, let me off with a warning or something.

I live in these vents, but like I mentioned They've been sealed so I don't think I can leave if I wanted to. If you could contact someone about that I might be able to slip out of here? I doubt I can get you in contact with my supervisors though; I don't remember who they are! Thanks for the tips about the sectors though, I havent had anything that wasnt a raw rat in a while.

[just-glados-thoughts]

Due to boredom, I will be flooding OSHA headquarters with a deadly neurotoxin. @osha-unofficial, you can’t murder me if I murder your entire organization first.

[osha-unofficial]

thats. not osha compliant. ventilation systems are sealed. you're not getting in

[osha-vent-daniel]

Haha

What

[just-glados-thoughts]

For now.

[osha-vent-daniel]

Unofficial come pick me up im scared

[just-glados-thoughts]

Due to boredom, I will be flooding OSHA headquarters with a deadly neurotoxin. @osha-unofficial, you can’t murder me if I murder your entire organization first.

[osha-unofficial]

thats. not osha compliant. ventilation systems are sealed. you're not getting in

[osha-vent-daniel]

Haha

What

[osha-vent-daniel]

Yo I think the Janitor left their Switch in the supply closet. Score

[osha--unofficial--archive]

Its MY teal I want it back

Come And Get It Daniel <3

Thats Right My Coworker Told Me Your Name HeHeHw! No More Anonimizing For You Mister!!!!

[osha-vent-daniel]

Ok bet

[osha--unofficial--archive]

WWWAit are You Daniel Or Are You SOme Other Creature In The Ventitudes?

[osha-vent-daniel]

Its me, 99.

Wait... there are others?-

[osha--unofficial--archive]

Are You Saying It’s You, 99 As If I Should Know You Or That You’re Also 99 ? Because If Its The Former I’d Need To See A Pic Of Your Face

Also Yea There’s A Rumor/Truth That 62 (Daniel SomethingLastName) Got Experimented On And Then He Was Like “I Live In The Vents Now And I’m gonna eat employees Because I HATE OSHA!” And 33 Said His Brother Hasn’t Stopped Crying Since But I Don’t Think Thats Physically Possible

[osha-vent-daniel]

Huh, well now I'm not sure who I am. I mean, I have this name tag that SAYS Daniel, but I sure don't remember any of that happening. All I remember is someone scraping Teal from my sleeping vent.

Speaking of which, can I have that back now please?

[osha--unofficial--archive]

I Mean....I Have 1/4 Of A Novelty Cup’s Full But. It Has Bug Juice In It. 

..

Yknow What I’ll Just Place It Next To The Nearest Vent I Hate It In Here Anyway

[osha-vent-daniel]

Eh I'll take what I can get, the eggs will appreciate it at least. Thanks.

[osha--unofficial--archive]

Eggs? Eggs? Eg-Can I see? The Eggs I Mean

[osha-vent-daniel]

Uhhh sure. Just squeeze into the vent in the restrooms then take a left, go straight, take a right, take another right, then take a left and keep going until you reach HR.

Just dont touch them ok? And don't let the higher-ups know

[osha--unofficial--archive]

I’m Good At Doing Things That The Higher Ups Don’t Know About! 

[osha-vent-daniel]

Great! Because I think these things could be legally classified as toxic waste

[osha--unofficial--archive]

Its MY teal I want it back

Come And Get It Daniel <3

Thats Right My Coworker Told Me Your Name HeHeHw! No More Anonimizing For You Mister!!!!

[osha-vent-daniel]

Ok bet

[osha--unofficial--archive]

WWWAit are You Daniel Or Are You SOme Other Creature In The Ventitudes?

[osha-vent-daniel]

Its me, 99.

Wait... there are others?-

[osha--unofficial--archive]

Are You Saying It’s You, 99 As If I Should Know You Or That You’re Also 99 ? Because If Its The Former I’d Need To See A Pic Of Your Face

Also Yea There’s A Rumor/Truth That 62 (Daniel SomethingLastName) Got Experimented On And Then He Was Like “I Live In The Vents Now And I’m gonna eat employees Because I HATE OSHA!” And 33 Said His Brother Hasn’t Stopped Crying Since But I Don’t Think Thats Physically Possible

[osha-vent-daniel]

Huh, well now I'm not sure who I am. I mean, I have this name tag that SAYS Daniel, but I sure don't remember any of that happening. All I remember is someone scraping Teal from my sleeping vent.

Speaking of which, can I have that back now please?

[osha--unofficial--archive]

I Mean....I Have 1/4 Of A Novelty Cup’s Full But. It Has Bug Juice In It. 

..

Yknow What I’ll Just Place It Next To The Nearest Vent I Hate It In Here Anyway

[osha-vent-daniel]

Eh I'll take what I can get, the eggs will appreciate it at least. Thanks.

[osha--unofficial--archive]

Eggs? Eggs? Eg-Can I see? The Eggs I Mean

[osha-vent-daniel]

Uhhh sure. Just squeeze into the vent in the restrooms then take a left, go straight, take a right, take another right, then take a left and keep going until you reach HR.

Just dont touch them ok? And don't let the higher-ups know