Overheard in Preschool.

Things I hear at preschool, and also other things.

[overheardinpreschool]

They don't have any burritos in this town

3 year old boy

[overheardinpreschool]

"Boys can't be bosses only girls are bosses like you and Mommy are the bosses"

3 year old boy

[overheardinpreschool]

Dead Presidents: Wages and Arguements with a Kindergartner

6 year old: "I bet you don't know who is on money." Me: "Different kinds of money have different things on them, but I think I know who's on most of our money, do you?"

6 year old: "Yes, The president." Me: "Well actually..." 6 year old: (interrupting and frustrated) "I mean like a different president!" Me: (giving in)"Oh, who is it?" 6 year old: (very proudly) "George Washington DC." Even though I technically won our bet, I didn't receive anything, not even one George Washington DC dollar

[overheardinpreschool]

[Your Boyfriend] doesn't love you because he only loves girls and I don't want you to be a girl anymore, so don't be.

5 year old girl

[overheardinpreschool]

You know girls can change to boys if they want to when they are big. I wish you would change to a boy.

5 year old girl

[overheardinpreschool]

If you don’t have a car or if you don’t have any friends, then you can call a taxi.

[overheardinpreschool]

I'm not going to miss you when I'm on vacation for 3 days anymore, but I'm still going to write you letters and tell you I don't miss you.

A 4 year old who was mad at me for making her buckle up.

[overheardinpreschool]

A few recent knock knock jokes as told by a preschooler:

Knock Knock

Who’s there?

Banana.

Banana who?

Knock Knock

…who’s there?

Banana.

Banana who?

Knock Knock.

….Who’s there…?

Arn’t you glad I said orange?! ____________________________ Knock Knock

Who’s there?

Joe!

Joe who?

Joes-aren’t you glad I didn’t say fruit?! ___________________

[overheardinpreschool]

"I saw a girl who had her ears peered in her nose" (She saw someone with a nose/ septum piercing. ) Also said to me by the same four year old girl today: "Stop looking at me or I'll kick you."

[overheardinpreschool]

Grown ups eat and then cross their legs sometimes.

[overheardinpreschool]

"I think Santa's calling!" What does Santa want to talk about?

"I think pants?"

[overheardinpreschool]

Tomorrow I sleeped- I didn't sleep- I don't sleep til it's tenty-one

[overheardinpreschool]

"Pretend I'm the big sister and your the Mom and our little baby died." I don't want to play that. that makes me feel really sad. "Ok, well how about we have a very nice tree and it fell over."

[overheardinpreschool]

I look like Belle, but you actually look like nothing. You don't look like anything but you can be a princess... I guess.

[overheardinpreschool]

I know nothing.

It's been so long but don't worry. Preschoolers still say funny shit. Here are some names for different toy cars by a 4 year old: "Fire Jam Soup"  "Super Dave Corn" "Tow Quill" Here is a conversation while drawing the tooth fairy: Her: This fairy is a mean fairy because she didn't leave anything for the girl. Me: Oh no? Why not? Did she leave her tooth under the pillow? Her: Wait actually she left her poop. Me: Yuck! that's gross. Her: But it's sparkly poop with an umbrella and it's not real... is that mean or no? I wasn't sure.   

[overheardinpreschool]

I got this.

Can I be a princess one day? "If you eat all your vegetables everyday and wait a long time. "

[overheardinpreschool]

Only girls can wear dresses to my house.

In response to me (a girl, -woman if you will ) opening the front door in a dress.