can't see for all the stars in my eyes

ashley. xxxiii. writer, dreamer, actress. an independent multi muse blog. semi selective, but open to new partners 25+. forced into beta editor. the drawback of starting a new blog.

[packagecfgirlyevil-a]

                                               packagecfgirlyevil  ☆ ♔

                                         ⚜ ashley. she / her. mid 30s.                          ⚜ lover of complex women with complicated dynamics.

> my characters. open starters. guidelines. > wanted connections. > single muse blog - merrickawood.

               moderate activity. semi-selective. frequent writer of fluff, angst & smut. often running on a queue.                                      tracking #packagecfgirlyevil

                           current mascot. ana de armas

[packagecfgirlyevil-a]

okay i'm officially moving ! find me @ packagecfgirlyevil if you'd still like to write together !

[packagecfgirlyevil-a]

i think i may return but move to a new space so. stay tuned.

[packagecfgirlyevil-a]

i think its safe to say i’m on a semi permanent hiatus - i will inevitably return at some point because i always do, but rping on discord is easier for me atm.

that being said, if we had some steady threads going on and you’d like to create a server with me to rp on discord, lmk !! if you have my handle already, just message me or send me a message on here - i still check in sporadically 🥰

[mctionsick]

With as much grace as she could with a fluttering heartbeat, she takes a seat her dark gaze not pulling away from Poppy's. She feels her cheeks flush at the suggestion. Before the blonde could get too lost in the music Nicola speaks up again, "Would you believe me if I told you this was my first lap dance?"

[packagecfgirlyevil-a]

"Then I'll have to make this one memorable," she murmured, her face mere inches from Nicola's as she grinned, the music starting to pump through her blood the same way it did at the club. Her body seemed to move instinctively; this, she was good at. Tuning out everything except the bass and the way her hips moved, the way Nicola's eyes this time were running over her exposed skin, it was a high unlike any other. Her fingers danced over Nicola's thighs, brushing lightly over barely exposed skin - "get up, dance with me. I bet you'd be incredible."

[tenderstars]

open: m/f/nb plot: summer beach camp — it’s the first day. our muses are counselors at a summer camp where all sorts of strange things happen. could be anything from romance to drama to disappearances to horror. muse: lennon carter. 20-25. piceces. pansexual. “stoner surfer girl”  

“wait, i’m new here. why is everyone acting so weird about me being the leader for cabin four?” to be fair, she had volunteered not knowing any better. “did something happen?” 

[packagecfgirlyevil-a]

madison bit down on their lip - she didn't want to scare lennon off, but she had to admit, it was surprising no one had warned the other. "it's an urban legend, really - the counselors who've been here a for awhile just think it's haunted. i personally haven't had any issues with it, and i'm right next door in cabin three - that's been my bunk for the past few summers and i never noticed."

[remnants-rps]

hear me out- a discord mumu where we each play like 2-3 characters that live in an apartment complex. think less friends, more like "this is a really cheap complex, so it'll be a mixed bag of neighbors" kind of mumu. or even a small town mumu??

hmu or like this post if you're interested, hehe.

[rockinrpmemes]

Let me make it clear:

If We Ship Together? You can throw starters and asks at my muse(s) anytime. Bombard me in IMs with headcanons and aesthetics. You don't need to ask my permission. Oh, and by the by, my little chickadee? Have fun shaking me off your blog if we ship it hardcore, together.

See you in hell 💋💋💋 ...jk ilu

[packagecfgirlyevil-a]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY FAVORITE MOST TALENTED HUMAN!!! I HOPE YOU ARE HAVING THE BEST DAY!! 💕💕💕

i love u so much thank u

[evocatiive]

@packagecfgirlyevil sent: 2) our muses with unspoken feelings forced to share a bed and end up cuddling. ( surprise me )

The anxiety thrumming through him leaves Gage apprehensive to even look her way, laying on his back even though he has always slept on his right side. If he turns, though, he will be facing her, and this situation is already uncomfortable and wreaking havoc on his nerves. His hands are drawn together in front of him, perched on his stomach. There's no way that he's going to be able to fall asleep with his thoughts spiraling like this. Curling his bottom lip into his mouth, he punctures the silence that has settled in the room, "Hey..." He calls out quietly through the darkness. "Are you still awake?"

[packagecfgirlyevil-a]

Spring break was supposed to be a nonstop party - instead, she’d broken up with her girlfriend she was supposed to have been staying with three weeks before, and dragged Gage with her in an effort to still have fun. But the flight had been delayed, the hotel couldn’t change from a one bed to a two bed room, and now they’re laughing in semi - darkness with parties roaring around them in an effort to sleep before the next days festivities. “Maybe,” she replies, stretching out next to him and trying to keep aware of giving him his space, “do you want me to yell at the neighbors so you can get some sleep?”

[mutatedangels-a]

📸 Mer & Jody

Send a 📸 to see 3-5 pictures that my muse has/has taken of your muse(s) // @packagecfgirlyevil

dude this is hIS FUTURE WIFE. the literal mother of his firstborn. <333

[mutatedangels-a]

📸 Mads & Soleil

Send a 📸 to see 3-5 pictures that my muse has/has taken of your muse(s) // @packagecfgirlyevil

soleil is so gay for her. <333333

[iknowitwontwork]

REBLOG IF IT'S OKAY FOR ME TO BOTHER YOU IF YOU'RE MY MUTUAL

[wynterlanding]

“You DO want to marry me? That’s news to me, Stella. Considering.” Harsh words but he’s still reeling from this rejection. It’s always something. This is his life. Abusive ex. Current woman he loves just shunning him and here they are. Standing around talking about it as if it’ll make any difference? Landon’s not that stupid to think it’ll go back to normal.

Maybe he should have listened to her then. About ditching her last fiancé? Oh yeah probably a tell tale sign what a fool he was to think he’d be any different. “Well, I guess I should thank you for not stringing me along and leaving me at the altar like your last one. Right?” Landon paused to sip his coffee. Black as his fucking soul feels right now. All the light is out of him today. Hell this entire week! Why is he so hellbent on letting her back in here to give him excuses when he deserves someone who won’t run at the drop of a hat. “Meant it… the fact you need time to even mean it… you know, Stella, I was an idiot to ask.”

The director shook his head. Stella is probably the one person he thought would be it for him. After everything she became a life preserver, keeping his head afloat this entire tabloid mess and lies. She didn’t believe Emeline. She believed him and that was enough for him to feel they’d be end game. Doesn’t work that way in real life as it does in movies, Lando. “A chance?” he echoed, caught off by that. “Stella, I don’t get it. You told me no. Admit you’d run if you said it too soon. What chance is this?” @packagecfgirlyevil // prev

[packagecfgirlyevil-a]

The smart thing to do would be to let him go - let him heal, lick his wounds, find someone better than her. She knows that. But she's always been inherently selfish, and she wants the future she had been thinking about. She wants him, and a home, and a family.

"I grew up incredibly privileged," she acknowledged, "and seeing my parents, and how in love they were - it was all I wanted. A fairy tale ending, just like theirs. But then my dad died, and I had to watch my mom try and pull herself together to take care of Al and I all on her own. She lost the love of her life when I was seven, and I watched some of her light and happiness go with it."

She'd never been so open with why she ran from things, what made her so scared. She never went on motorcycles, and she was left with a constant fear that if she had what her mom had - that true happiness that only comes from someone knowing all of you - that it would be ripped away from her too.

"I'm terrified of that, okay? I'm scared that we could have everything, have the world at our feet and the happiest years of our lives, and then I'll lose you anyways. For a stupid accident, or some random event - and so I push, and I run, because at least then I control how I lose you. But I don't want to." She let out a deep breath, trying to keep the tears from falling from the corner of her eyes. "I'd rather have an incredible decade with you and a lifetime of mourning than nothing at all, okay? And it's stupid and it's naive and it's juvenile and it's selfish but there. That's why I ran, okay?"

[evocatiive]

The way that Dylan phrases it makes it seem as if he and David are sharing custody of a possession, when neither of them owned the woman. Her decisions are her own, as is her heart, and Reed has no idea where that really lies. If what they have been doing has been a fun way to pass the time, if he's the only one who feels a swell in the chest whenever the other is near. "It's not that —" He chickens out, diverts to a topic that hasn't really crossed his mind. "Just wondering if I should start looking for a new place. Me and David's lease is up soon, so, y'know, this is the ideal time if you guys want to make that lea."

[packagecfgirlyevil-a]

"Oh." The idea of him moving out hits a pang inside of her somewhere, but she's not sure if she's ready to acknowledge it yet. She does have to make a choice, but for someone who preferred lists and analysis and data, her heart and her head can't seem to settle on an answer. Maybe if he took himself out, it would be easier - then she doesn't have to make a choice, he's made it for her. "I mean, I'm not moving in,if that's what you're asking. David and I - " she bites her lip, looking towards where her boyfriend had disappeared into the kitchen. "I think we all know that isn't forever, and moving forward on any steps will only end in worse heartache for all involved."

[mutatedangels-a]

He shouldn't say anything. Jody couldn't just leave, come back, and think he has a piece or say in any matter, especially when it had to do with Merrick. She was a single mother—that was admirable and all he needed to do was sing her high praises, no matter how much he disagreed with the way she was going about things.

Right?

Maybe it ticked him off a little bit, hearing that the father wasn't in the picture, because Merrick could be in a better place. She wouldn't have to be living here, and she wouldn't have to be forced to pick a house just a few doors down away from her family. If he was in the picture, that could mean a better life for Merrick and her son.

One that Jody himself couldn't give her.

He supposed he was projecting, but the boy has always been act first, think second, and that sort of strategy has worked out far too many times on the turf for him to be wary now that he was out of it. And Merrick—he has never really watched his words with her, and no matter how much distance between them or time passed, he wouldn't start.

He bit his lip, waiting for a few seconds before finally saying, "Don't you think that's kind of unfair to him? Lucas's dad, I mean." It was almost like he knew he was saying something wrong, but he kept his gaze on Merrick. He shrugged. "And... I mean, I don't know your son but maybe you're setting him up to not have a good relationship with his dad by keeping them apart from each other."

[packagecfgirlyevil-a]

Merrick's gaze clouded over; everything she did was for her son first and foremost, and for Jody to even suggest that she was harming him in any capacity made her bark out a bitter laugh - how dare he insinuate that she hadn't considered every possible option? How dare he of all people, try and make these claims?

"He's yours."

The words came out sharper than she'd ever wanted, and she knew as soon as she said it there was no way she could take it back. But she could feel her blood boiling, the one worry she'd had more than any other thrown in her face.

"Are you happy? Is that what you want to hear? You left for college, and I never begrudged you that. I never asked you for anything. But you can't just come and assume - do you think I haven't done everything I can to make sure he has the best life? What am I supposed to do, Jody? Track you down through your agent? Ask you to pay child support when I don't need your money?" She scoffed, folding her arms across her chest - in all the ways she envisioned this, it was never like this.

"My son has a mother, and an aunt, and grandparents, and friends - he has all the family he needs. If he needed a father, I would have told you. But he doesn't. And you have an entirely different life that isn't meant for children right now, that isn't meant for an obligation like this. I did what I did for both of you - for you to get everything you wanted, and to keep Lucas happy. So don't ever say I'm hurting him, because you know nothing about what it takes to be a parent."

[mctionsick]

010, the arrival hall at an airport [@packagecfgirlyevil]

When he sees her his breath catches in his throat. There were very few people he would be thrilled to see after a red eye flight but she was at the very top of the list. Being back home was weird. It felt like he clawed his way out kicking and screaming and when his siblings got out he vowed to no longer clean up his parents messes. That lasted all of maybe two years and now his father is getting dragged off to prison... again, and somebody needs to make sure his mom doesn't go off the deep end.

His arms are around her the moment he's close enough, "I told you I was perfectly fine getting an Uber," he says, "--but I'm so fucking happy to see you."

[packagecfgirlyevil-a]

There was no chance she was going to let him take an Uber home; her job at the tv station kept her up weird hours anyways, and while she had to call out to come pick him up, her heart skipped a beat upon seeing him. He never came home for good reasons, but that didn't mean she wouldn't take what she could get of his return.

"As if I'd ever allow that," she scoffs, embracing him as tightly as she can, "but you can buy me breakfast to make up for this absurd flight hour - what time do you need to be home for your mom, so we can make sure you're there?"