"House MD is unrealistic" you're right here's my script for a realistic medical show
Patient: I threw up 4 gallons of blood
House: sounds like you need to lose weight
we're not kids anymore.
h
Not today Justin

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d e v o n
Show & Tell

if i look back, i am lost

shark vs the universe
hello vonnie
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Cosmic Funnies
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⁂
Monterey Bay Aquarium

Discoholic 🪩
Keni
Xuebing Du
One Nice Bug Per Day
Acquired Stardust
i don't do bad sauce passes
seen from Türkiye

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@padre-matt
"House MD is unrealistic" you're right here's my script for a realistic medical show
Patient: I threw up 4 gallons of blood
House: sounds like you need to lose weight
I love you, vintage gay Pikachu. You’ll find the boy for you, I promise.
is anyone here ready for fat transgender summer can we give it up for fat transgender summer
happy pride (traced from official art since i wanted to cut out certain things (empty card space/text/&c.) but it was only supposed to be for a haha funny joke so i didn't wanna spend a million years on it)
Still thinking about this mobile game ad I got. You will f**k increasingly large creatures.
Screenshots I took to traumatize my husband when I got this ad
It is HILARIOUS that they're censoring fuck. Let's not offend any delicate sensibilities by dropping a complete f-bomb in the middle of explaining the rules of the monster fucking 💦💦💦 game.
This is going to enter my vocabulary
I think abt this tiktok all the time
Diversity hire bryson ur absolutely slaying
At 1 PM on a Friday I get an email from my boss. I'm busy as hell so I don't check it immediately. Then I get a phone call from my boss, which has almost never happened before. I'm a white collar worker, a historian. There's never a 'historical emergency' requiring a phone call to kick me in the ass and get to work.
The request is so urgent my boss needs it by the end of the work week. Which, y'know, is 5 PM on a Friday. So I have four hours to do it.
It's a forwarded request. Somebody contacted a member of the donation team asking for help, "I need a map from the Vietnam War to use for a presentation." It's somebody she's trying to coax into giving a five figure donation to the museum.
The request was asked to the donation team member, who then emailed my boss, who then emailed and called me urgently.
This map required:
North and South Vietnam in it
All four areas that South Vietnam was divided into for military purposes ('Corps') clearly delineated
Four cities, all of them horrifically misspelled, and only identifiable because I know what battle the requester is asking about (it’s in III Corps on the border with Cambodia) (the requester danced around the battle but I’m knowledgeable enough to identify it)
Has Laos and Cambodia in it
Has the Ho Chi Minh Trail in it
So. I was mad about the 'you have literally four hours to find a map with a lot of requirements.'
I was then mad at myself about finding a copyright free map from Texas Tech University within half an hour, proving her right for asking me to do it.
Then, after I found a map that perfectly met the requirements, I was equally amazed, baffled, and horrified when I read further into the forwarded email chain.
The donation team team member they were speaking to used AI to generate a map.
The above put half of North Vietnam in South Vietnam, made the Ho Chi Minh Trail a country, made 60% of Cambodia part of South Vietnam, put the DMZ extremely high up in North Vietnam, completely disconnected the southern tip of Vietnam, misplaced all of the Corps zones, etc etc
At the very last second the donation team member had a moment of divine clarity, remembering there's three historians on payroll to ask for this kind of thing from. So she contacted my boss while saying, "I had fun with this, but I decided I should check for accuracy before I send it to the donor! I need a fact check by the end of the day, then I send it"
My boss, while not the most knowledgeable on the Vietnam War, does know her geography. She took one look, and knew it was so off she called me to tell me how urgent it is that I look at the email and respond
good fucking god, jesus tap dancing goddamn christ, I'm glad I was asked to look at it and then find a real map
My fear has never been that AI would replace human intelligence. My fear has been that the people who Know Things and the people who Make The Decisions are almost never the same people.
We’re throwing real intelligence out on the street to starve while worshipping the shambling Frankenstein-ed corpse of knowledge puppeteered by those who see us as disposable assets.
tiktok teen lgbts would not survive in the 80s and 90s when lesbians called gay guys fags lovingly and gay guys would call us dykes lovingly
now rebloggable. fuck with me
Why the fish
The fish is what makes the post rebloggable
The fish is what makes this post fuckable
happy flat fag friday
Attempting to locate a new Greek restaraunt using my gyroscope
Tags via @redtailfins
Shrek 2, while a cinematic masterpiece, is also an interesting look at queerness and comp het.
Fiona is married so it's time to reunite with her parents. But instead of marrying a prince, she's married to an ogre. Not just that, but she's also an ogre. (Yes everyone knew she would sometimes be an ogre but that was when she was a child, she didn't know she would be an ogre for the rest of her life, and besides once she met the right prince she would stop being an ogre. She was supposed to stop being an ogre.)
But okay they're both ogres. We can still ask about when they'll have children because even if they're ogres they can still have kids, right? That's what married princes and princesses do so naturally that's what everyone does. Even if ogres might not be great parents (I've heard that ogres eat their young, is that something you people do?) it's still something that should be discussed.
And okay you can stay in Fiona's childhood bedroom filled with all the reminders that hey, everyone thought she was just a princess and princesses marry princes. Her toys left out from the last time she played with them. The prince slays the ogre. The princess offers a token of gratitude for slaying the ogre. Fiona wrote Mrs. Fiona Charming a million times in her diary because what else was she supposed to grow up to be?
And Harold you have to fix this, your country can't be ruled by ogres. You were unfit to rule when you were a frog but I changed you, I made you better, I made you a prince. You know how this works. Think of your daughter's safety.
Shrek goes to the Fairy Godmother and oh honey, ogres don't live happily ever after. It's just not done. It hasn't happened in all of fairy tale history. You have to change the both of you to be happy. You have to present as a prince and a princess. It will be better. You'll fit in better that way. You'll be accepted that way.
huge fan of when cats reach out and touch each other with disrespectful intent
i hate it when somethings like "yes this is monsterfucker material" and the monster is question is just like a guy and hes slightly blue
top 3 hobbies for young adults:
1. borrowing misery from future
2. carrying grief of the past
3. agonizing over the present
Excuse the shoddy zoom and lack of focus (my phone did its best), but if you look closely at the center you'll see a singular potato of a little grey kitten (plus mum in the last one)! That's the first Margay kitten this zoo has had, ever, in its over 180 years of history! Apparently they are strictly solitary, and bringing the adults together for breeding purposes is easier said than done. More info and not-blurry photos are here in the announcement. :)
I spent over an hour searching for the kitten in their large and very cluttered enclosure, even the adults are often hard to find. Worth it!
my toxic german trait: participating in Müllentsorgung discourse on Reddit on a Saturday morning
love it when cats forget to roll the carpet back up