can y’all just… like or reblog if y’all are polyam-safe blogs

tannertan36
will byers stan first human second

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

PR's Tumblrdome
ojovivo
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
$LAYYYTER
wallacepolsom
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
we're not kids anymore.
styofa doing anything
Mike Driver
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
🪼
Monterey Bay Aquarium

if i look back, i am lost

Kaledo Art

★

JBB: An Artblog!
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
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@panpolypocket
can y’all just… like or reblog if y’all are polyam-safe blogs
Gay culture needs to get genuinely freakish and weird again. There’s tremendous liberation to be had in that spirit. Fuck up gender binaries! Write weird erudite dramas and stage them in strange nightclubs and have drag queens star in them! Embrace both beauty and grotesquerie—in fact crush them together! See what happens! Experiment! Love the ugly, the unpolished, the imperfect, the clownish! Mock at the heterosexuals! Imagine new worlds and new ways of being! Imagine old worlds in new ways! Transmute yourself! Ridicule yourself! Everything’s wrecked, so take the pieces and build yourself a house or an erotic monument or a library or a garden or a bordello! More life! More life!
The difference between bisexuality and pansexuality: a powerpoint guide.
(updated)
… but….why put the my little ponies in there…….
1. Because they match the color scheme of the pride flags
2. I like ponies.
3. It reenforces the light and cheerful tone of the overall powerpoint.
This is probably one of the best and least offensive/erasing guides out there and people are complaining about the ponies.
Fucksake.
THANK YOU FOR THIS! so many people don’t understand that bi = 1) same/similar genders and 2) other genders. my personal definition of bisexuality is super close to pansexuality, I just like bi as a label for myself more.
Kinda tired. Kinda horny. Extra anxious. A novel by me.
Hunted girls grow shells
& they call us hard women.
As if survival could ever be delicate.
— Brenna Twohy, from “I Guess I’ll Tell It Like This,” swallowtail
These g o r g e o u s pride cocktails are made by lemonscribs on Instagram!
(Go support them, they’re really good!)
Hey polyam pan people?
You’re not greedy for liking multiple genders or for wanting multiple partners. Loving people will never make you or anyone else a bad person. You are allowed to want partners of any gender. You are allowed to love anyone you choose. The way you love and who you love is not wrong, and neither are you. In fact, you are pretty phenomenal and pan-tastic! I think you being you and loving who you love is pretty great!
LGBT+ Planet Icons
PNG's with transparent backgrounds
Gay/Queer | Lesbian | Transgender | Bisexual | Pansexual | Asexual | Aromantic | Oriented Aroace | Nonbinary | Genderfluid
Like and reblog if using or saving!
If you don't see your flag and would like me to make one, feel free to DM me or make a request in the comments!
LGBT+ Planet Icons
Part II
Gay/Queer | Lesbian | Transgender
Bisexual | Pansexual | Asexual
Aromantic | Aroace | Oriented Aroace
Like and reblog if using or saving!
If you don't see your flag here and would like me to make one, feel free to DM me or leave a request in the comments :)
Nonbinary | Agender | Genderfluid
I really, really dislike the narrative that surrounds romantic relationships that if you don’t want to spend 100% of your time together, you’re not in a healthy relationship. And I don’t mean “ugh I can’t stand them right now” or the whole “wimmin, amirite? Can’t live with ‘em, but still expect them to clean up after me” heteronormative, hateful bullshit. I mean the fact that romantic ideals have been elevated to such unhealthy peaks of unrealisticness, that even wanting time and space to yourself is considered abnormal.
Like some of the things people are describing when it comes to their “ideal” relationship? Honestly just reminds me of the codependency worksheet my therapist made me fill out, and I ought to know because I’m extremely dependant on my partner to stay alive. Granted, my situation is a little different from people who aren’t disabled or chronically ill. But this still doesn’t change who we are as people, even if it has changed the dynamics of our relationship.
But we’re still emotionally very independent people, and like doing things on our own. We always have, even before my health issues, we had our own friends. We loved wandering off and doing stuff on our own pre-Corona. And even now we still like having some downtime apart, even if it just means he’s watching TV in the other room, and I’m on the computer talking to all y’all. That downtime doesn’t mean we’re dysfunctional or dealing with unresolved resentment with each other, it just means we don’t feel the need for constant physical proximity to feel close. We’re still getting our needs met, we’re still happy. And yet some people would say that because we don’t feel the need to do everything together at every minute of the day, we must secretly be unhappy. Why? Why are some of you so dysfunctional you can’t spend any time apart? (See how not nice it is for someone to say something like that?)
And also, while I’m at it, erase the idea that you’re so in love with someone you will never be mad at them because that’s also not healthy or realistic. There will be times your partner will irk you. There may even be times that they outright piss you off or vice versa. What matters is how you handle those moments and work through them together. And if you’re continually framing your relationship in terms of “we’re so in love we’ll never be angry at each other, so I don’t even have to think about it,” you’re not preparing yourself to deal with real and very valid emotions that are part of the human social experience. You can be the most in love, most in tune, best-matched couple ever, and still find yourself annoyed by something. And it’s the people who break up who either don’t know how to deal with this, or just plain won’t because it breaks their internal narrative of True Love™ overcoming all, not realizing that love is both a feeling and a choice, and sometimes you gotta choose to work at it.
And this applies to queer relationships as well. All too often, I see people saying, “we’re queer, so this will never be an issue” when what you really mean to say is, “we’re queer, so these particular problems that are prevalent in heteronormative relationships will not affect us in that way.”
But that does not mean you will never come across a problem that does put a strain on your relationship. Like, say, a fucking global pandemic that locks most people in their homes for a fourth, fifth month in a row with no other means of socialization or stimulation.
Or one of you getting sick and suddenly requiring constant care…
And that shit ain’t easy regardless of who you love. Being a caretaker is emotionally and physically draining, and I could write for hours about why there need to be better support systems in place for the caretaker spouses of chronically and terminally ill/disabled partners and how they often become chronically ill themselves. (I was a caretaker myself from the age of 9 onwards. I know this shit isn’t easy. It’s why I made ETD go to therapy when we realized I would need him to take care of me if we wanted to keep me alive.) But that’s another topic for another post.
Like, honestly, maybe it’s me. Perhaps it’s my experiences and how I view love and relationships, but the whole idea of “I don’t need to take time for myself I’m in a loving relationship!” is just… not good. Everyone needs their own space sometimes and demonizing that as unhealthy is, well, not healthy.
Humans are human, we’re social creatures for the most part. But sometimes you just gotta go off by yourself into the metaphorical woods of the psyche and spend some time being comfortable with yourself. And if you can’t do that without feeling like your relationship is in trouble, well, maybe you ought to evaluate why.
A perfect example of the unhealthy expectations for romantic relationships is the idea that a healthy romantic couple will always sleep in the same bed, and if a couple is sleeping apart, that means their relationship is in trouble. Usually this comes with the implication of them no longer having sex.
When the facts are:
- Sharing your bed with another person who makes noises or may move or jostle you in their sleep, or may not have 100% the same sleep cycle as you, is, unsurprisingly, often bad for your sleep quality
- Couples that lead active sex lives are perfectly capable of reconciling their libido with the logistics necessary to sleep in separate beds and still occasionally sleep or cuddle together as one desires
Putting aside the sleep, the expectation that a married couple will share a bedroom ignores people’s individual needs for privacy and alone time, even from their loved ones.
all I want in life is financial stability, consistent kinky sex, and good food.
fat girl: wow it sucks that everyone looks down on my body type :/ loser ass dude: thats not true…i would use you for sex
the amount of men and skinny people mad at this isnt shocking they never learn how to not make shit about themselves
Brené Brown, Daring Greatly
Pride flags! pt. 1 / 2
Please like/reblog if using. Credit is appreciated but not necessary.
For bisexual and pansexual polyamorous people, realizing they are polyam can be an especially painful process as it can feel as though you are living up to a stereotype or that you are giving bisexuals and pansexuals a bad reputations. However, those who think that being polyamorous is a bad thing and therefore something that bis and pans should be ashamed of having within their community aren’t good people. They’re means and selfish and prioritize their comfort over other people’s happiness. You don’t need to have those kinds of people approve of you. And as for bis and pans being angry at you for “giving them a bad name” anyone with sense knows that polyam people aren’t where that stereotype comes from, it comes from homophobes trying to devalue to importance of bisexual and pansexual people’s love lives. Pan and bi people who will be angry with you would have been angry with you for being any type of polyamorous person simply because they are intolerant.
Nobody who would hate you is worth getting love from.
Last rope sesh with Sir