"Sometimes," she mused with a flick of her cigarette over the banister. "The world seems just a little too...colorful." She turned towards me with a lazy gesture of her hand, and I was memorized by the way the city's lights reflected and danced in her eyes.
"That's when I want it all to burn.' The words formed on her lips but it was the wind that carried her whispers to me.
"I don't want to watch it necessarily--it's not like I enjoy seeing others suffer." An awkward laugh and a shrugged shoulder carried into, "but it would make everything so much simpler, you know?" Her eyes became unfocused as she let her gaze drift yo the nightlife thriving on the streets below. "Because without color, there would be no chaos. Only black and white, order and balance..." She paused, and a smile flitted across her lips as if she were enjoying a private joke. The silence was almost tangible, but what could I say that would give color meaning again?
"And gray," I blurted loudly, like the words were escaping my mind when I hadn't even tried to tuck them away. Eyebrows raised, she faced me once more with an unreadable question flickering in her eyes. The quiet between us extended until I felt almost suffocated by its presence--and I was doing whatever I could to keep the rising panic at bay.
"Yes," she murmured finally. I tried not to choke on a breath of relief as it filled my chest. Her approval was a response I hadn't realized I'd been waiting for.
"Black, white, and gray," she agreed. "That would be quite lovely, wouldn't you think?"
I couldn't answer, because whatever she wanted to hear from me would be a lie. Because she didn't want life to be lovely--she wanted it to be simple.
And life itself will always be many things. Beautifully dreadful, then horrifically lovely. Painfully loud and then awfully quiet, and so--SO much more.
But life--it will never merely be simple, no matter how passionately she wishes it to be so.
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