I'm petsitting. Today while walking the dogs, I dropped my phone right as one of them hiked a leg. He peed on my phone. I thought we were friends.
Monterey Bay Aquarium

shark vs the universe
🪼
d e v o n
Keni
No title available
TMBGareOK. The Official They Might Be Giants tumblr
RMH

tannertan36
almost home

Game Changer & Make Some Noise

oozey mess
No title available
Cosimo Galluzzi
noise dept.
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Mike Driver
sheepfilms
The Bowery Presents
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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@pardon-my-scifi
I'm petsitting. Today while walking the dogs, I dropped my phone right as one of them hiked a leg. He peed on my phone. I thought we were friends.
Oh, you think you're safe now?
Nothing can deliver you from these paws!
Reblog to animatedly boop your followers
Goddamn. Okay
Did you have a kid in your neighborhood who always hid so good, nobody could find him? We did. After a while we would give up on him and go off, leaving him to rot wherever he was. Sooner or later he would show up, all mad because we didn't keep looking for him. And we would get mad back because he wasn't playing the game the way it was supposed to be played.
There's hiding and there's finding, we'd say. And he'd say it was hide-and-seek, not hide-and-give-UP, and we'd all yell about who made the rules and who cared about who, anyway, and how we wouldn't play with him anymore if he didn't get it straight and who needed him anyhow, and things like that. Hide-and-seek-and-yell. No matter what, though, the next time he would hide too good again. He's probably still hidden somewhere, for all I know.
As I write this, the neighborhood game goes on, and there is a kid under a pile of leaves in the yard just under my window. He has been there a long time now, and everybody else is found and they are about to give up on him over at the base. I considered going out to the base and telling them where he is hiding. And I thought about setting the leaves on fire to drive him out. Finally, I just yelled, "GET FOUND, KID!" out the window. And scared him so bad he probably wet his pants and started crying and ran home to tell his mother. It's real hard to know how to be helpful sometimes.
A man I know found out last year he had terminal cancer. He was a doctor. And knew about dying, and he didn't want to make his family and friends suffer through that with him. So he kept his secret. And died. Everybody said how brave he was to bear his suffering in silence and not tell everybody, and so on and so forth. But privately his family and friends said how angry they were that he didn't need them, didn't trust their strength. And it hurt that he didn't say good-bye.
He hid too well. Getting found would have kept him in the game. Hide-and-seek, grown-up style. Wanting to hide. Needing to be sought. Confused about being found. "I don't want anyone to know." "What will people think?" "I don't want to bother anyone."
Better than hide-and-seek, I like the game called Sardines. In Sardines the person who is It goes and hides, and everybody goes looking for him. When you find him, you get in with him and hide there with him. Pretty soon everybody is hiding together, all stacked in a small space like puppies in a pile. And pretty soon somebody giggles and somebody laughs and everybody gets found.
Medieval theologians even described God in hide-and-seek terms, calling him Deus Absconditus. But me, I think old God is a Sardine player. And will be found the same way everybody gets found in Sardines - by the sound of laughter of those heaped together at the end.
"Olly-olly-oxen-free." The kids out in the street are hollering the cry that says "Come on in, wherever you are. It's a new game." And so say I. To all those who have hid too good. Get found, kid! Olly-olly-oxen-free.
— Robert Fulghum, "All I Really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten"
watching a video on brewing Mesopotamian beer and look at this orange man (his ass cannot guard the barley)
slander! Did any potentates steal the barley on his watch????
They did not.
You wake up one day and discover you've lost control over a random action or feeling!
Spin the wheel to find out what!
How bad is it?
Actually way better than before!
Its good
It's alright
It's annoying but I'll be fine
It's pretty bad
IM DEAD
worse than death
Nothing changes/results
This idea was submitted by @dbnekonico!
Yeah I think most people do
Spin this wheel twice... These are your new roommates at Starfleet Academy!
How do you feel about this?
AMAZING!!!! This is the best case scenario
Great! I like both of these people
Good.
Eh... Could be better, but it could be worse
Bad. I'm not going to enjoy this year
TERRIBLE. Someone will end up dead
I'm dropping out
other/nuance/secret whatever option
if one/both of your new roommates is a child you assume responsibility of that child
if you get the same person twice, you have to live with both of them
We're about to have the most wild, fucked up, twisted lesbian sex you've never even heard of
Hikaru Sulu and Ezri Dax...I can work with that.
I got The Adversary to the Villain from Libby today! Only time in my life I was happy to be woken up at 3am by an animal. Glad I was able to catch the notification!
My brother told me today "the 'tism hit you so hard it fucked up your chromosomes."
I would like this on a shirt.
Why is adulting so expensive? I'm over it. Who do I speak to for a refund?
I'm going to ask something and I need you all to understand that I am on my hands and knees begging here. Please, please, please, please, PLEASE tag your fanfiction as "written by AI" if you use it. You aren't being clever and tricking people into thinking you wrote it yourself. It's so easy to tell if it's AI, it's just annoying opening up a fic and having to close it.
Just watched the new ep of Strange New Worlds. I have a feeling those cryochambers are gonna come back and bite them in the ass.
I've introduced my mom to Stargate. The inevitable conversation happened while watching the episode Learning Curve.
My mom: The kids are the adults, aren't they?
Me: It's been awhile since I watched SG-1. I don't remember what really happens in each episode. I usually just rewatch the episodes where Daniel dies.
My mom: Didn't he already die?
Me: That time, yeah.
My mom: What the fuck?
this heatwave fucking sucks how am I going to serve my liege like this
im never leaving this hellsite
i swear if this is the second stupid sword picture post i make that gets to 10k i'll just go kill someone
FUCK OFF!!!!!!!!!!!
this heatwave fucking sucks how am I going to serve my liege like this
im never leaving this hellsite
i swear if this is the second stupid sword picture post i make that gets to 10k i'll just go kill someone
FUCK OFF!!!!!!!!!!!
I was beginning to think this puzzle was a myth, but I found two if them on clearance at Marshall's.
I was in Spencer's the other day with my sister and I was talking about how they didn't have any Green Day shirts. A kid overheard me and said "That's because they're Dad Rock." So if you need me, I'll be in the corner crying and aging very ungracefully.