more philadelphian swoops headcanons bc this is the thing i care Most about right now
y’all? i think you mean “youse guys” ???
absolutely pronounces it “cawfee”
makes fun of jersey every chance he gets
but absolutely loves going down the shore like ??? he’d probably physically defend ocean city (nj not md, please)
being able to go down the shore any time he wanted was literally the only reason he learned to drive bc there’s no other reason to be able to drive if you live in philly
gets chirped any time the team gets subs because they’re “Hoagies youse guys”
“then why is it called subway and not hoagie-way swoops”
“they’re called sandwich makers not hoagie makers”
(this is what my best friend who’s from another state says Every Time hoagies are brought up so #confirmed)
asks for jimmies on his ice cream
he’s gotta go to the mac machine?? to tap mac??? just say you’re going to the atm brah.
the rest of the team is always asking kent to translate what the fuck swoops is trying to say
(kent doesn’t really know half the time)
the new york/philly rivalry is So Real between swoops and kent
if they start talking about the rangers/flyers or yankees/phillies it’s probably a good idea to separate them
in fact “everyone is responsible for keeping kent parson and jeff troy away from each other any time a philly/new york team is playing each other” is one of the most important rules in the Welcome to the Las Vegas Aces Handbook™
the Mistake has been made before; kent and swoops didn’t talk to each other for days last time they were allowed to watch a flyers/rangers game together
yousharknotpass
2087
origamiaround
pixelskylines
amandla
