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i tried to think about jobs they would do as teens and came up with everyone working at sears together!!! (cartman is 100% going to become a manager….)
"COLORADO - JUNE 2009" (2009), FERNA ZAHSUM
i just wrote this drabble!! i have to say this was quite a generative prompt for a teen au!!!!!
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
he ran into my yaoi paddle. he ran into my yaoi paddle 10 times
SORRY I DIDN'T KNOW LIFE COULD GET THIS GOOD
okay i've just woken up and now i am back on the kohls website choosing outfits for the m4... this is for the development of my work... i tell myself
though i think i could definitely see kenny and kyle as thrift store shoppers, i don't think any of them wouldn't shop at kohls... there were a lot of good options...
stan
looking over this, i feel like an evil genius. there were surprisingly a lot of classically nerdy t shirts at kohls! i thought the coke one was kind of jackassy but he might wear it.. that columbia jacket was literally the first result for outerwear i was like omfg YES it is just too perfect for him. he might not be the type to actually wear the first shirt much but he might own it...? and he IS the dark wash jeans wearer... bootcut... straight leg, he would wear them low and wear the same jeans every day with a brown leather belt... i HC that he has short-ish legs for his height
kyle
it was harder to pick a shirt for him... maybe he would just wear a plain solid color t shirt or long sleeve... i don't think he would actually buy those nerdy shirts but maybe more like end up with them. for his jeans, i think they would be more light wash than stan's and maybe slightly rattier but less blue than the ones in the picture- like a bit less preppy, maybe they are his dad's old jeans but he takes good care of them. i think he is also the type to wear the same ones every day- but he doesn't wear a belt and wears his jeans a bit higher up on his waist. for outerwear i think he gets saddled with something a bit more ostentatious than stan's jacket but doesn't notice.
cartman
he was sort of easy- i think he would wear a lot of light colors for some reason. the palette is sort of butters-y but as far as i'm concerned, you could probably switch their wardrobes around and nothing would be different.
kenny
lol it's like i gave him outfits, but i think the second one is the best for him. i really like that jacket it's like unbranded and super basic- i imagine he just ended up with it lol common theme... nobody here is really someone who shops. i think realistically he is a zumiez shopper or would be if the opportunity presented itself. he's a little bit emo...
i lied here are my shoes headcanons for teen m4...
cartman i've chosen these timbs... but also these adidas sneakers... while i also want him to be even more of a hypebeast type with like red jordan 1s, i think these sneakers are a good daily pick for him...
for stan i've chosen these nikes... i could see him in other worlds... or a non-contemporary stan as a vans or adidas guy but.... i think realistically in high school in 2026 these nikes are his move
to throw him a bone, i've also added these pretty sad polo sneakers, but i think he would just own them and not actually wear them maybe... like his mom gave them to him or something which is nice
for kenny, i chose these white dcs initially but i thought about it more and i think it depends on how much money he can throw around, these pink converse happened to be on sale at kohls.. is he the kind of guy who takes pride in his shoe choice... maybe he is, so he'll choose the dc's... but i think he could rock the pink converse in a situation where he needs to. i think i just liked that this color was shelved in the mens. the other obvious choice for him is jordan 4s but i found all these shoes at kohls and i don't think they have them..
kyle- to be honest i'm not even sure that these are men's shoes they might be women's... like stan i think he would be the type to go to the store and be like "i just want shoes that say nothing, just like, shoes" but he is more dedicated to actually achieving this and less willing to get an overtly sporty pair. i think it's possible that these could be the outcome
okay i am coming in with some secondary cast ideas..
for jimmy- i think he is really a low top converse wearer!! it would be an intentional choice on his part... not too sure about the color i think he's good with whatever and can kind of make it work
craig- i think craig is one of a rare breed who is a actually a vans wearer but doesn't skate at all or anything even in a contemporary setting!! i can see him with them...
tweek it's gotta be laceless... i initially thought these first non slip ones but i don't think he would go for any of these actually... it's so hard to imagine him going into a store and buying shoes. the middle ones look like something you would be given in prison?? but they were on the kohls website and they're kind of cool... maybe the third is most likely...
for tolkien i left kohls and went to the nordstrom website... now... i don't know... i think the pair on the left is more likely but i can also see him liking these adidas sneakers in a universe where he is maybe a little more relaxed and stylish
clyde... initially i was excited about picking a pair of shoes for clyde but it turned out to be more difficult than i expected. i think he would go in wanting to care about his shoes but ultimately not caring, and i guess add on the fact that his dad has a shoe store in canon or something ..> i chose these off of zappos. i don't even remember the name of em....
“I want you, I need you, right now, right here.”
drunk babies, just the way I like it. u////u
Please, people, write more fanfiction of Stan & Kyle being drunk and making out in parties either secretly or in front of e v e r y o n e because I WANT TO READ IT
I SHIP THSI PLS
i lied here are my shoes headcanons for teen m4...
cartman i've chosen these timbs... but also these adidas sneakers... while i also want him to be even more of a hypebeast type with like red jordan 1s, i think these sneakers are a good daily pick for him...
for stan i've chosen these nikes... i could see him in other worlds... or a non-contemporary stan as a vans or adidas guy but.... i think realistically in high school in 2026 these nikes are his move
to throw him a bone, i've also added these pretty sad polo sneakers, but i think he would just own them and not actually wear them maybe... like his mom gave them to him or something which is nice
for kenny, i chose these white dcs initially but i thought about it more and i think it depends on how much money he can throw around, these pink converse happened to be on sale at kohls.. is he the kind of guy who takes pride in his shoe choice... maybe he is, so he'll choose the dc's... but i think he could rock the pink converse in a situation where he needs to. i think i just liked that this color was shelved in the mens. the other obvious choice for him is jordan 4s but i found all these shoes at kohls and i don't think they have them..
kyle- to be honest i'm not even sure that these are men's shoes they might be women's... like stan i think he would be the type to go to the store and be like "i just want shoes that say nothing, just like, shoes" but he is more dedicated to actually achieving this and less willing to get an overtly sporty pair. i think it's possible that these could be the outcome
one time i was poking around on the wayback machine and read some great fics one where kyle and tweek(?) had a fistfight next to an orange smoothie kiosk at the mall and another where stan and kyle were killed in a gas station holdup but now... i can't find them.... and i worry i may never find them again
oops i found em but looks like the author left the fandom for a reason aww man
man you have got to give it to this person...