I can't come home

Patrick Calloway | 24 | Marine | Engaged to Carma

[its-dakota-mills-blog]

This is now an Indie blog

Based in Portsmouth New Hampshire.

[fxckingfox-deactivated20150615]

Right… I’m not going to do that, he’s one of my best friends. I’m not going to use him for sex in anyway. I don’t like the fact you’d think that.

[patrick-calloway-blog]

“I don’t like the fact that you’ve even heard of Carma but guess what looks like we’re both shit out of luck... Just know if I ever catch you in my house I have a .45 and I was a sniper for the U.S Marine Corps. I won’t miss and I shoot first ask questions later.”

[fxckingfox-deactivated20150615]

I-uh. Wait, How do you know that? I- I mean, what are you talking about?

[patrick-calloway-blog]

“I watched a lot of porn.... then I saw a picture of you...” he shook his head. “Stay away from my Fiance he’s not a sex toy.” 

[fxckingfox-deactivated20150615]

and what’s wrong with me? You don’t even know me.

[patrick-calloway-blog]

“I know how you take it up the ass. I know that you like to film your sex.... or wait... maybe it’s getting paid for sex. Does Carma know you’re a porn star” 

[fxckingfox-deactivated20150615]

Just want to finally have a name for the face. I need my face the way it is, for work and what not. Do you not let Carma have any friends or..?

[patrick-calloway-blog]

“No.... I don’t mind him having friends... just not you.”

[fxckingfox-deactivated20150615]

Woah, okay. That came out of nowhere. You’re Patrick, aren’t you? I’ve been friends with Car for four years… So I don’t think that can just happen cold turkey.

[patrick-calloway-blog]

“Uh huh... and? I’ve known him since he was five.” He shrugged. “I mean... you like your face the way it is don’t you? I’d hate to see what a pretty face looks like with a broken jaw and a detached retina.” 

[fxckingfox-deactivated20150615]

Yes.

Who’s asking?

[patrick-calloway-blog]

“If you know what’s good for you you’ll stay the fuck away from my fiance”

[patrick-calloway-blog]

“Are you Fox?” 

[slow-down-autumn]

“you uh- you okay?”

[patrick-calloway-blog]

“I’m not that great at conversation.”

[nicolette-cariver]

She smiles and nods understanding. “At least you’ve got people looking out for you, right? Nothings worse than having to suffer a PTSD attack by yourself.”

[patrick-calloway-blog]

Patrick bit his lip. “PTSD is a disorder.... not an attack. It’s something I always have... The flashbacks, the anxiety. It’s something that’s in me... You’re thinking of a Panic attack.”

[mavrrick-oriley]

“Then adopt him. Dogs can go through PSD too so I would keep that in mind. That’s what stopped me for talking in one or two. I have Bree and I can’t have a dog getting triggered with her around.” he said. “But I would love to take the dogs in my unit, they were the best.”

[patrick-calloway-blog]

Patrick nodded. “I know.... I want to adopt him but I have Carma to think about... and Carma is afraid of anything that moves... I don’t want him to get more freaked over having two living beings with PTSD.” He shook his head. “I killed a guy the other night.” He said offhandedly. “He broke into our house and I killed him. I didn’t even blink......” Patrick took a deep breath. “You know... there’s a part of me that’s envious of those who died. They sacrificed everything.... but at least now they’re at peace... us... we... we sacrificed as well.. and now we have to live for the rest of our lives with it.” 

[nicolette-cariver]

She shakes her head. “Not really. It tends to not help my own issues. Well call me naive but I think that’s just ridiculous. But I still think you guys deserve better.”

[patrick-calloway-blog]

“Thank you... but we’re just trying to live the American dream just like everyone else.” 

[patrick-calloway-blog]

@CallowayUSMC: Remember the fallen

[slow-down-autumn]

“Yup, I am she..” She says, a little shyly.

[patrick-calloway-blog]

Patrick nodded looking down and putting his hand in his jean pocket. 

[nicolette-cariver]

She stares at him. “Wow people really do that?” She shakes her head. “I’m sorry to hear that. I don’t think that’s right. I mean like I don’t know it’s just I don’t see how you can be so cruel to someone who did what you did. Like I mean like I don’t support the war but you have to at least support the warriors fighting in it. I’m really sorry to hear that people do that.”

[patrick-calloway-blog]

“You don’t read the news much do you?” He asked. “I mean...I’m not judging you or anything... but... There are all kinds of things that people do to those that sacrificed everything so that they can do what they did...”

[mavrrick-oriley]

“No, no. It’s fine. Vent all you want. We all deal with war in our own ways.” Mavrrick smiled softly. “Getting a dog is not a bad thing. My daughter just guilt tripped me into getting a puppy. Now I have a 5 year old and a little ball of fur that like to bit my chair.”

[patrick-calloway-blog]

Patrick chuckled and shook his head. “I can barely take care of myself mate. I don’t know if I could handle the responsibility of a dog... though... I heard a K9 from my unit is retiring soon. His first handler was... well... let’s just say his handler is in a better place now.... so... maybe I can give a good life to a dog that’s as fucked up as we are.”

[slow-down-autumn]

Autumn smiled, recognizing the name. “Autumn Pearson.”

[patrick-calloway-blog]

“So you’re Autumn. I see why Aaron likes you.”