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YOU ARE THE REASON
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@paunch-out-stuffs
Hey-o! Figured I’ll make this introduction post as I’m sure y’all will see a lot of me! Really wanted to make a Punch Out Archive blog and so here we are! This blog will be focusing on saving posts all related to Punch Out!
The dividers are by @/firefly-graphics
Other Blogs Similar To Mine
@aran-ryan-herigate-posts < an archive of every post relating to our favorite rat Aran Ryan and one my inspirations for starting this blog up!
Everything under the cut is just blog details :P
♡ the boxers on valentines day ♡
YOU THOUGHT I WOULDNT PLAN SOMETHING FOR VALENTINES DAY?? YOURE WRONGGGG
11th anniversary of don’s death
Happy pride
Happy Memorial day (US) and Happy birthday Kaiser!!!
I can’t go to school today, Mom, it’s a national holiday
Punch Out Wii Boxers Ranked
Thought I’d give my opinion on this since I’ve already expressed biases towards/against certain characters. I will be including Donkey Kong and Doc Louis but not Little Mac (because he is the objective best). The list will go from 15: the worst, to 1: the best. Before I start, I’d like to say that all of these characters are good, well-crafted characters, it really just comes down to personal bias who you prefer. And with that, let’s get started:
15. King Hippo
King Hippo is barely a character. Everything he “says” (there are apparently translations) just boils down to being hungry and he has no personality outside of that. I don’t hate him, but I don’t really care about him. His fight is also pretty boring all things considered. The contender fight is pitifully easy once you know what you’re doing and his title defense fight can go on for a long time and get very monotonous. At least his music’s kinda cool.
14. Super Macho Man
As someone who lives in America, I hate Macho Man with a burning passion. It’s not because I’m “patriotic,” it’s actually kind of the opposite. I’m not offended by his stereotype because it’s mean, I’m annoyed by his stereotype because it’s accurate. I deal with people like this on the daily: in the news. His catchphrases are obnoxious (except sometimes when they’re cut off. That’s kinda funny, admittedly) and he’s egotistical even compared to some of the others. He’s the type of person I actually want to punch in the face so I thank Punch Out for giving me that opportunity but I still hate the character. His match is fine. It’s a bit too easy in both contender and title defense compared to Soda and Bull but hey, at least they tried. His music’s alright.
13. Donkey Kong
Don’t get me wrong, I love Donkey Kong’s inclusion in this game. I think it’s amazing that Nintendo made a match for one of their most famous characters and the fight against him is very unique and challenging to win by KO. That being said, I never really played Donkey Kong so I don’t really have the connection to this character that others do. So yeah, great cameo, not one of my favourite fighters.
12. Bald Bull
Sorry, Bald Bull fans, but I’m not the biggest fan of this raging lunatic. In fact, he kinda creeps me out. People make jokes about Great Tiger being a furry (which he is), but Bald Bull straight up acts like a bull to the point of literally assaulting the poor referee. It’s kind of gross. To that same point, he is also completely shameless about his horrid anger issues which is personally not fun to watch. I get that he was driven mad by the paparazzi (or whatever that cutscene was trying to convey) but it’s still pretty over the top. I’m also not a big fan of his fights. It’s not too terribly difficult in contender mode (except the stupid bull charge) but it’s downright ridiculous in title defense. I firmly believe that his title defense match is the hardest in the entire game, yes even more difficult than TD Soda and TD Sandman. I cannot express with words how much I despise the star punch gimmick. Getting the star punches is frame perfect, making it feel like luck, and getting hit once makes you lose them all. And you need those stars to even knock him down. Seems a bit extreme for the middle fight in the world circuit, doesn’t it?! I was at this fight for hours and was over the moon when I finally managed to beat him. Also, his music kinda sucks. However, I put him over Macho Man because despite everything I just said, I don’t actually hate Bald Bull. I hate his fights but I don’t hate him personally like I do with obnoxious american.
11. Soda Popinski
Oh boy, Drunk Man. I don’t really see many reasons to like him but not any to hate him either, apart from his stupidly difficult fight, that is. I actually find it pretty easy in Contender. There’s a lot of strategies to knock him down really fast and his pattern is pretty basic. As for title defense, did they really need to make it that ridiculously hard? Yeah, there are tricks to make it easier and he has a set pattern but getting into the rhythm of that pattern is incredibly difficult and one slight mistake sets you back to two stun punches. It’s beyond frustrating. And yet the game deems him and Bald Bull to be easier than Macho Man. Why? As a character, Soda is just kinda there for me. It’s fun to make jokes about his steroid soda at least. Also, his music is for some reason one of my favourites tracks in the game. It’s just so epic.
10. Bear Hugger
Alright, now we’re onto the characters I actually like. Bear Hugger is a fun character. He’s one of the more exaggerated stereotypes though I can’t really say for sure whether this one is accurate or not but I’m guessing the maple syrup and hockey stuff at the very least is. I also love the squirrel. It’s implemented into the fight kind of oddly, but it makes his title defense fight pretty enjoyable. It’s a difficult fight but not one I’ve lost recently. The contender fight is fun too, it’s definitely one where I get to spam a ton of star punches. His music is good too. Not much to say on Bear Hugger, he’s fun but I like the other characters more.
9. Disco Kid
Kinda sad that the Wii version only introduced one new character to the roster but at least it was a fun character. Disco Kid’s matches are not a challenge. Contender mode, title defense, he’s one of the easiest fights in the game. He makes up for that by being incredibly over the top flamboyant and cocky, this time in a fun way. I like that he dances throughout his whole fight, I think it’s cool when every little aspect of someone’s match ties into who the character is. Disco Kid is a flamboyant dancer and that is perfectly shown through his mannerisms in the fights. I especially love how in Title Defense, he’s not really bitter or determined to beat Mac he’s just like, “Oh a dance club? This is cool, might as well work this stuff into my boxing routine.” It’s pretty excellent. I’m not a huge fan of disco, but his theme music is pretty good.
8. Aran Ryan
If there’s one thing I’ve seen since joining this site, it’s a lot of Aran Ryan. People on here really love this guy and even many of the YouTubers I’ve seen play this game say he is one of if not their favourite character in the game. Personally, I think he’s a little overrated. However, I do still like him and see why other people like him. He’s sort of a “love to hate” kind of character with him being a complete psycho that’s probably a sadist and a masochist considering how he seems to enjoy being punched and beating the hell out of everyone. It’s fun in a twisted way. His fights are also both pretty fun. Everyone really likes the cheating aspect and yeah, it’s pretty ridiculous that he can literally bring in a weapon and get away with it. However, it also makes his fight stand out from the others. He’s so horrible that he’s just fun to beat up. It’s also the only world circuit fight in title defense that I don’t hate with every fibre of my being. So yeah, fun character, with excellent music might I add.
7. Glass Joe
Here’s another favourite here on Tumblr. To be honest, the fact that people on here liked Aran Ryan didn’t surprise me at all. In fact, it seemed perfectly in character. However, it did surprise me to see how many people liked Glass Joe. I thought he was kind of underrated before but now I see that he’s getting the love he deserves. I love how even though Glass Joe is in every way a french stereotype, he also directly defies the stereotype of the french being quick to surrender. He lost one hundred times and still didn’t give up, becoming determined to defeat Little Mac after earning the headgear. It’s unironically really admirable. Glass Joe’s fights are never a challenge. Contender, title defense, champion’s mode, motion controls, he’s always kind of a joke. However, he is meant to be a tutorial fight for new players and this game gets much more challenging as it goes on, so it’s understandable. They did do a good job at making him more challenging in title defense, but it was still pretty easy at least in my opinion.
6. Von Kaiser
Von Kaiser’s a little underrated in this fandom. Maybe I’m speaking from bias, since I have so many headcanons about him but I really do think he’s a good character. He is just as much of a coward as Glass Joe and isn’t a much better fighter (his contender and title defense fights are both incredibly simple) yet Von Kaiser has a significantly better record than the rest of the minor circuit and even Bear Hugger, with 23 wins and 13 losses. He must’ve gotten those wins from somewhere and I doubt they were all from Glass Joe. That combined with the fact that Kaiser is the oldest boxer in the game (42) makes me think he was once a great boxer but has now passed his prime and refuses to give up, sort of like Glass Joe, but a little more tragic. Regardless, it’s fun to speculate. And I feel kinda bad for Von Kaiser, I mean the dude gets beat up by kids and basically goes mad after being beaten by a seventeen year old boxing newbie. Also, his music is pretty intense despite the fact that he’s treated like a joke by the game. Like Glass Joe, they did do a good job of making Kaiser more difficult in title defense by giving him a one hit KO and plenty of fake outs, though I don’t particularly struggle with either of those.
5. Sandman
Sandman is scary as hell. None of the other boxers really intimidate me, even the one with ridiculously difficult fights, but Sandman is a different story. Everyone else in the game has some kind of silly quirk even when they are serious but this guy is deadly serious about boxing. I mean, they introduce him by showing him beat the shit out of everyone you just faced before, some of which the player may have struggled with. It’s a great introduction for a final boss. His fight in contender is certainly the hardest in that mode and while I didn’t struggle with his title defense fight as much as TD Soda and TD Bull, it was still incredibly hard to beat. And unlike TD Soda and TD Bull, he actually has final boss vibes, so he does deserve his rank (unlike some other characters). Similar to Aran Ryan, his fight also requires the player to be more on offense, at least in my experience.
#4 Doc Louis
Doc Louis is severely underrated in this fandom and just in general. I love how encouraging he is to Little Mac even when he loses repeatedly, I love his silly tips that more often than not are cheesy dad jokes or puns. He’s just a good wholesome dad that loves his chocolate. I love him. Sadly, I have not played Doc Louis’s Punch Out so I don’t really have a perspective on how the fight is apart from videos online but it does look pretty fun, and it’s freaking Doc Louis. How can you not love him?
#3 Piston Hondo
This guy is also kind of underrated, maybe because he’s a bit vanilla? I don’t know, but apart from Sandman, he is undoubtedly the most serious about boxing. It’s actually a bit scary. I mean, this dude can catch a sword in his bare hands and outrun the bullet train, he could easily become champion after Little Mac retires. In fact, for me at least, his title defense fight is the most challenging fight in the major circuit for me. Yes, harder than Bear Hugger and Great Tiger. Those fake outs and speedy Hondo Rushes kept getting me. So yeah, very dedicated to boxing. He’s also just very respectable in general, keeping a calm demeanor throughout the fight and even bowing to show respect. He also doesn’t laugh at you when you get knocked down like literally everyone else does. (Apart from Don, but he still taunts you by asking if you want more.) Yeah, he gloats, but he’s a good sport. It’s nice to see someone who plays fair amongst a crowd of cheaters.
#2 Don Flamenco
Yet another character I’m surprised doesn’t get more attention in this fandom. I dunno, maybe my opinions are just weird. That being said, Don Flamenco was always going to be one of my favourites as he is the only foreign speaker in this entire game I can understand without subtitles. Though even if you don’t know spanish, Don’s character is still very clear and very amazing. Like, I’m sorry, but his contender intro is the best sequence in the entire game. You know immediately what he’s all about and it’s just so beautifully over the top to see this try hard dance his way into the ring with a rose. Actually, “beautifully over the top” is a great description for Don Flamenco in general. He hits every note of the “Spanish man” stereotype in the first few seconds you see him: being a bullfighter, getting all the girls, dancing the flamenco, and just being handsome in general. I don’t know if that last one is an actual stereotype but it’s undeniably true. And none of that is a bad thing. He is a positive figure, if a little cocky, and all of these things that the game could make fun of him for (the NES version certainly does), are actually shown in a positive light. I’m not too fond of bullfighting being shown in that light but it is very popular in Spain so… eh. Also, I do like that Don Flamenco fights like a bullfighter in the ring, baiting you into “charging” or attacking before countering. It’s a nice detail. However, it does make the fight a little too easy. In contender mode, even without doing the infinite, I barely have any trouble with him. He’s easy to get stars off of, his attacks are not that hard to dodge or counter, and if you do the infinite combo, you can destroy him in seconds. In title defense, he is more difficult for sure, but he’s the easiest fight title defense fight in the major circuit. That being said, holy cow is he amazing in title defense as well. He was already over the top in contender but in title defense, after one loss might I add, he acts like it’s the end of the world and becomes completely emo. This could’ve been completely obnoxious or stupid but in my opinion, it makes him very entertaining. He’s just so fun to watch in general, I love his epic music, and I love this angsty telenovela character. Amo al personaje Don Flamenco. El es tan entretenido y guapo. Necesita más amor. Because I mentioned that I know spanish earlier and the first first thing people always ask me is to speak some so there you go. Onto number one.
1. Great Tiger
If you’ve seen my other stuff here on Tumblr, you probably knew this was coming. My very first post on Tumblr, as well as the second, was about Great Tiger and I have tons of pictures of him in my likes. I guess I just have a thing for charming arrogant divas. Seriously, while he’s not as over the top as someone like Disco Kid or Don Flamenco, Great Tiger is a total diva and kind of a show off. He’s always using his clones to glorify himself or taunt you, which would normally be annoying but for some reason, it’s not in his case. And it’s not because I don’t know what he’s saying, the inflection in his voice makes it clear enough that he’s trash talking (and I’ve looked up translations). It’s because Great Tiger has a sort of cold determination, like he is ready to destroy you first, glorify himself after, probably the reason he doesn’t have a taunt, unlike nearly everyone else in the game. He is completely focused on the match and very cool-headed as well. He’s very respectable, even when he’s literally telling you to go drink your mother’s milk. On a side note, I looked up those translations as a kid and I still can’t get over the fact that that is something he actually says. Like, what on earth Nintendo? Still, it’s kinda funny to me. Anyways, I love Great Tiger’s fights. His contender form is fun and I love that intermission scene where he switches places with Doc, showing what a likeable douche he is but his title defense form is my favourite in the game. I really love the magical element, what can I say? The flashing jewel is like a game of Simon put to boxing, I love that he teleports all over the place, the Magic Rush is gorgeous bullshit, and the fight keeps me on my toes but not to the point of being impossibly hard. It’s also fun to experiment with certain elements of the fight, because it can be incredibly varied depending on what you do. just really fun. Whether I do the special knockout or play through the whole fight, I have a fun time fighting Great Tiger. It also helps that his music is spectacular, my favourite in the game. I dunno, those bongos just feel so good on the ears. Great Tiger is also just really interesting in general, and I feel like there’s a lot of unanswered questions about him. How does he have magic? (I know the NES version has an explanation for this but the Wii version does not and is substantially different.) What is the extent of his abilities? Is the jewel the source of his power? It seemed to be directly linked to his corporeal clones in title defense. Is he even of this world? I don’t know, but damn it’s fun to speculate on. I’d love a story just about his backstory, how he got his magic, how he became a boxer, I care about that stuff. So yeah, Great Tiger is the most interesting character in this game, and that’s why he’s my favourite. (I also low-key crush on him, but that’s subjective :)
Anyways, hope you enjoyed my list, it was kinda long, but I have a lot of opinions on this game and this is a good place to put it.
The WVBA plays Kahoot
Super Macho Man: Secret classroom superpowers? Obviously.
Rick Bruiser: *angrily stares at the winner while in second place*
Disco Kid: *Dances along to the music like a crazy person*
Glass Joe: How are we supposed to know this? We learned it tHrEe WeEkS aGo!
Title Defense Don Flamenco: Puts head down halfway through and refuses to continue playing*
Birdie Mac: *Sweats nervously while in first place*
Little Mac: *types in kashoot me and French kisses it*
Piston Hondo: Was I too fast? Bitch, no.
Great Tiger: *is in the game as four different people*
Gabby Jay: *reads the question six times before answering*
Aran Ryan: *yells out the wrong answer*
Nick Bruiser: *Not playing. Made the kahoot, and is somewhat entertained*
Dragon Chan: *screeches like a pterodactyl when hitting the wrong key*
Got some headcanons of Great Tiger? I haven’t seen anyone ask yet
Absolutely I do!
Great Tiger Headcanons:
Tiger came froma poor family living on the streets in Mumbai. He was the eldest of 3 children, one little brother and one little sister.
Their parents were pretty scummy, and be still holds quite a grudge against them for their past actions.
A bit after Tiger was first blessed with his powers, his parents asked for him to create a stack of gold for then to use. After summoning it, the spell caused him to get serious migraines and a surge of pain throughout his entire body. He asked for his parents to help but they gapped it right after the money appeared, leaving him and his siblings to fend for themselves.
Luckily for them, a woman named Mitali, blessed with powers too, aided them. She took them in as her own and taught Tiger all the proper techniques to harness his full magical ability.
Tiger has an abundant amount of respect for the woman and will take no slander towards her
Tiger himself is a very respected figure throughout his little town, seen as a symbol of hope or opportunity.
Man's is a pretty knowledgeable guy, but he's also a wee bit of a gossip. He knows a lot of secrets, but he'll keep yours safe if you're nice to him
He's super petty, especially towards Don. The two have a fierce on and off rivalry that goes on because "Señor scoliosis likes to think he's the greatest!"
His magic is pretty damn powerful, he surprises himself a lot of the time.
He has many clones and can make them look exactly like him or change just tiny little things about them
He has three main aspects that take the form of him but with slight differences depending on the aura/element they're based on: Ahaan/White is Air (many eyes and very quick), Sumit/Green is Earth (flowers and very very long hair), and Divij/Blue is water (slow movements and his aura is always dripping)
He can time travel. He won't though
Good friends with majority of the WVBA but gets on the best with SMM and Bald Bull...somehow
Very close to the Major Circuit, treats the like a second family
Time to confess, I love punch out too-
WVBA Talent Show Auditions
Heike Kagero: I was thinking of doing some magic.
Great Tiger: You? Magic?! Heike, it says TALENT show.
Punch Out Mansion AU
Thought I’d elaborate a little bit on my Punch Out AU where all the WVBA boxers live in a mansion together by giving some background on the characters, like their cliques and lives outside of boxing and other random tidbits I felt like adding. This was all just for fun and is admittedly biased toward/against certain characters, so take it with a grain of salt.
Glass Joe
-Along with boxing, Joe is a photographer.
-Only tried boxing out on a dare and was horrible at it. But he kept trying, insisting he could get at least a few wins. The WVBA liked him so much that when he did get his one win, he was given a place in the minor circuit and is essentially a rite of passage for new challengers.
-No one can really bring themselves to be mean to Joe.
-Sandman learns French from Joe so he can shit talk Little Mac in front of him. Joe also learns English from Sandman and can speak it decently, though he has a noticeable accent.
-His closest friends are Von Kaiser, Sandman, and Little Mac.
-Favourite food is baguettes. (I think that was a little obvious)
-Dog person, pretty social and outgoing.
-Dang good at cooking and baking. Always makes food for the others.
Von Kaiser
-Boxing was Kaiser’s main gig for a while but he’s now out of his prime. He used to be a great boxer in his thirties and was even the champion of the major circuit for a while. However, old age and increased cowardice made him lose more and more until he was only able to defeat Glass Joe to keep his position in the minor circuit.
-Everyone calls him “sir,” some mockingly and others sincerely.
-His english is passable, but he gets certain phrases/words wrong sometimes. Everyone tries to be polite about correcting him.
-Cat person.
-He and Joe are best friends, meaning Kaiser also hangs around Sandman and Mac.
-Plays video games just because the ‘kids’ wanted him to do it. His favourite is NES Mario.
-A bit of a dad to the group, being the oldest.
Disco Kid
-Also started boxing because someone dared him and stuck with it because he wanted the exposure for his disco dancing career. Out of all of them, he is the newest to boxing. (Apart from Little Mac, of course)
-Often wears leotards.
-Dances around the house with headphones on a lazy day.
-He and Don Flamenco are best friends and often play Just Dance (their favourite game) competitively.
-They both also hang out with Great Tiger. (Cuz they’re divas)
-Disco Kid is also a famous TikToker.
-He and Don worked together to make: “I want a hippopotamus for Christmas.” Where they basically make fun of King Hippo.
-Dog Person
-Can’t cook at all.
King Hippo
-Nobody knows his real name so they just call him “Hippo.”
-Favourite food is all.
-Doc Louis shares some chocolate bars with him.
-King Hippo’s son, Prince Potamus took over the throne “temporarily” when King Hippo left for boxing. Now that it’s been a year, people are questioning whether he will ever return to his home island.
-He can’t hold a controller, much less play video games. However, he does wreck everyone at Swordplay in Wii Sports Resort. Nobody can figure out how, but they can’t manage to beat him.
-Just eats everything raw without preparing it.
Piston Hondo
-Does martial arts professionally like Karate and Boxing and shit. He is also new to boxing, and was offered directly by a WVBA person after they saw one of his martial arts demonstrations. Hondo accepted and did some training before starting his boxing career. He fights anyone who challenges him, which is why he hasn’t passed his position, he hasn’t had a chance to challenge anyone himself.
-He speaks very slowly in English in order to get all the words right. It is slow, but proper.
-Pretty much everyone from Major Circuit and onward arm wrestle with Little Mac. Hondo tries to regulate the arm wrestles the best he can. (It needs to be a fair fight!)
-Favourite food is sushi. (I think this is kinda canon, but whatever)
-Piston Hondo and Little Mac train together. Their morning jog is outrunning the bullet train.
-Hondo and Doc Louis are the “dads” of the group and are the most responsible.
-Everyone kind of respects him, even the higher ranks.
-He’s not really a gamer, but he likes Ace Attorney.
-Almost exclusively cooks food from his home country, going off of recipes from his childhood.
Bear Hugger
-Apart from boxing, he is a lumberjack.
-He challenged everyone in the minor circuit and won, but couldn’t defeat Hippo. So he just decided to challenge the first major circuit person, who at the time wasn’t Hondo because Hondo only has one loss.
-Loves camping but none of the others ever want to go. (Aran Ryan might go to prank him.)
-He keeps his squirrel as a pet. One of the others has to take care of it while he’s out. (Hondo or Doc usually offer)
-Favourite food is maple syrup. (Also kinda canon)
-He’s pretty chill with everyone and content to go with the flow most of the time.
-Mobile gamer. He’s really dedicated to PvZ in particular.
-Probably arm wrestles Mac from time to time.
-The only one to really get along with Bald Bull all that well.
-Wakes up early to make pancakes for everyone.
Great Tiger
-He is a street magician, probably. Maybe a professional magician with like a show. I don’t know how this stuff works.
-Probably seduced the ref to get so many decision wins.
-He beat everyone up to Don and was literally about to challenge him for the championship when Little Mac came along. (We can all agree that Great Tiger is much more difficult than Don Flamenco, right?)
-Either didn’t beat King Hippo and did the same thing Bear Hugger did or did beat him and didn’t take the belt because it was “beneath him.”
-Total douche with his clones. He’ll do things like tickle Little Mac to win an arm wrestle. (Hondo and Doc try to stop him but can’t)
-Total prankster.
-Uses magic literally all the time even when he doesn’t need to.
-He surprisingly knows a good amount of English. He still forgets words/phrases and enunciates certain things oddly but he can carry a solid conversation in English.
-Switches to Hindi to trash talk the others, particularly Little Mac. (Even if he’s grown to secretly respect the persistent kid)
-Hangs out around Don and Disco and will help them prank people for TikToks. They will also game together.
-Favourite food is pakora. (It’s an indian dessert. If you’ve never tried it, it’s delicious)
-Same as Hondo, in which he just knows how to cook foods from his country. Uses his clones to do every little task in order to cook. (Ex: Will have one stirring something, one at the rice maker, and another at the stove)
-Eats insanely spicy foods. (Will sometimes eat chili powder right out of the shaker)
Don Flamenco
-His full name is Juan Eduardo Flamenco Ramirez. He was nicknamed “Don” by his friends growing up and stuck with it for his boxing name. He used “Flamenco” as the second half of his name because it was pretty.
-He is canonically a bullfighter and boxer. That’s all you really need.
-Don climbed the ranks like Mac did. He originally kept the minor circuit belt for a while but decided he wanted something more impressive. He challenged Von Kaiser for the major circuit belt and won.
-Also probably seduced the ref if we’re being honest.
-Loves dancing and expensive dates.
-His best friends are Disco Kid and Great Tiger. He nicknamed Disco Kid “Niño de Disco” and Great Tiger “Gran Tigre.”
-He is pretty much bilingual, and has little trouble switching between English and Spanish. He will switch to spanish to tease Little Mac, though it’s pretty harmless in comparison to some of the others.
-He’s only emo in the ring and sometimes around Little Mac. “It’s not a phase, Mac.”
-Dog person.
-Favourite food is churros. (A spanish dessert. Also delicious.)
-He’s really not a gamer and will only play Just Dance with Disco Kid.
-He punched Bald Bull through the roof for a TikTok. Completely unrelated to that, there is a “natural skylight” in Don’s room.
-Challenges Little Mac to arm wrestles whenever he’s bored. Apart from Hondo, he’s probably the least “cheaty” out of them.
-An excellent cook. Because he loves to impress the ladies.
Aran Ryan
-Actually used his real name for boxing. The absolute madman.
-Apart from Boxing, Aran is a telemarketer. He also scams people on the streets as a side hustle.
-He started on the World circuit, the absolute madman, and Soda Pop was the first boxer he met. Aran Ryan can’t manage to beat him or any of the others though and picked on the lower ranks to work up a record. His “number 5” rank is technically unofficial.
-Wastes a lot of money on alcohol.
-Eats nothing but potatoes.
-He and Soda Popinski are best friends. I could see him and Great Tiger either being friends or rivals.
-Doesn’t get along with many of the others. Bald Bull especially is his enemy.
-Learned Russian to communicate with Soda. Likewise, Soda learned more English to communicate with Aran.
-Tries to use two hands while arm wrestling Mac. Doc or Hondo try to get him to knock that shit off.
-Dog person
-He loves gaming and will hack literally any game he can get his hands on. Newer Super Mario Bros Wii is his favourite game.
-Is banned from the kitchen.
Soda Popinski
-Works at a bar selling drinks.
-He’s been boxing for a long time. Held one of the circuit championships at some point but lost it. His other loss was against Sadman.
-He and Aran Ryan are drinking buddies. (Yeah sure it’s soda. It’s spiked with vodka or steroids. You can’t fool me.)
-He’s not much of a gamer, but often gets pulled into playing Aran Ryan’s hacked games with him.
-Always drinks the entire supply of soda. If anyone else wants soda, they have to hide it in one of their rooms.
-Chugs an entire can of steroid soda before arm wrestling Mac.
-“Favourite food? Uh, soda! That is a food, right?” -him at some point
-Understands English well, but has trouble speaking it himself.
-Mostly keeps to himself oddly enough.
-Doesn’t cook. Pretends to not know english when someone asks him to.
Bald Bull
-Apart from boxing, he’s a professional bodybuilder.
-Just kinda challenged people randomly and somehow won most of the time. His losses (pre Mac) were against Macho Man, Sandman, and twice against Doc Louis.
-Is laid back unless the paparazzi come around or someone does something to piss him off. Then he goes beserk. Like the time Don used him to make a “natural skylight” for a TikTok.
-Probably started the arm wrestling tradition against Little Mac, but no one is really sure.
-He and Doc Louis insult each other constantly. Aran and him are also bitter enemies.
-Talks shit about everyone in Turkish.
-Speaks in very broken english and usually hides out in his room.
-He is most chill around Bear Hugger, his closest friend.
-The others normally don’t let him touch a video game controller. However, he did beat King Hippo at Swordplay, shocking everyone.
-Can probably cook just fine but was preemptively banned from the kitchen so no one is really sure.
SMM
-His real name is Chadrick, like the asshole he is.
-A Hollywood actor for sure.
-Was the champion for a while until Sandman kicked his ass. He didn’t take any of the other belts because it was “beneath him.”
-Buys all the skins and battle passes in Fortnite. Also buys a ton of other useless rich person shit.
-Doesn’t live in the mansion but will visit every now and then during parties and shit.
-Eats nothing but In-n-Out. (Thanks Tumblr, for conflating these two in my mind)
-Is totally lying about his age.
Mr. Sandman
-His real name is Michael. People often make the comparison between him and Mike Tyson.
-He looked up to Mike Tyson as a kid.
-He is 100% devoted to boxing. Before boxing however, he worked in retail, which would explain his utter rage with the world.
-Didn’t take the minor or major belts because it was beneath him.
-Extremely competitive with Little Mac.
-“LITTLE MAC YOU ATE MY FUCKING LEFTOVERS THIS CALLS FOR A REMATCH!” -Sandman, all the time
-Also arm wrestles him a lot and challenges him at Minecraft, the favourite game of the two of them. He has a Minecraft world that he’s used for six years on Survival with all these crazy builds.
-Fairly chill when not boxing or competing with Mac.
-Good friends with Glass Joe and admires the persistent little guy despite his lack of skill in boxing.
Doc Louis
-Was the champion before Macho Man. Climbed the ranks like Mac did, and gave up his belts after retiring. Sandman was probably the final straw.
-Fought Bald Bull back in the day, and often won. They’re still rivals now.
-Favourite food is chocolate. (Literally canon, but whatever)
-The ultimate dad of the group.
-Gives them all advice, but clearly picks his favourites (Little Mac).
-All the older fighters get a little nervous when they see him eating chocolate. (You know what I mean if you’ve played Doc Louis’s Punch Out)
-Plays games with the others when they need an extra player.
-Loves cooking and does it all the time, often for some of the others too.
-He’s retired so he doesn’t “officially” live at the mansion. However, the couch has become his designated spot and the table beside it is where he puts his bag of chocolate bars.
Punch Out Wii Boxers Eye Colours
Completely random and unasked for: the Punch Out Wii boxers’ eye colours, because for reasons that might be clear in about a month or so, this topic is on my mind. To my knowledge, all of their models in the games have colourless eyes (except Little Mac) so these are just headcanons.
Little Mac: Look Aqua Blue to me
Glass Joe: Chestnut Brown
Von Kaiser: Hazel, look more Brown
Disco Kid: Baby Blue
King Hippo: Dark Brown, though they appear Black
Piston Hondo: Dark Blue, like Sapphires
Bear Hugger: Leaf Green
Great Tiger: Piercing Green, like Emeralds
Don Flamenco: Deep Chocolate Brown
Aran Ryan: Hazel, look more Green
Soda Popinski: Light Brown
Bald Bull: Fiery Amber (yes, people can have amber eyes, but it’s very rare)
Super Macho Man: Blue Contacts
Sandman: Stormy Gray
Doc Louis: Kind Caramel Brown
Did I use this as an excuse to describe eyes: the gorgeous windows to the soul? Yes, yes I did.
(Another edit? Yesiree)
Meet Kareena! Tiger's little sister (19). Finally making a proper debut...well kinda lol
Kareena herself is a gorgeous soul, and a big opportunist. She always gives everything a go. As well as beautiful and outgoing, this girl is also gifted in magic, much like her brother. Though it certainly doesn't reach the same extent as Tiger, he is teaching her to gradually reach that point.
Anyways time to summarize each of the POW boxers’ backstories in like one sentence because I can—
(also quick heads up to all of the people who don’t know me that well, my lore for the PO series is pretty fucking weird-)
(reposting from Discord-)
Joe: Trans boyo who didn’t like dressing cutely because it made him the victim of ab//se and his parents kicked him out for that
Kaiser: Was a war veteran.
Disco: got punched in the face for being gay during high-school and then moved somewhere else I guess
Hippo: Literally a clone of a prince from another country that was basically exiled to an island-
Hondo: survived several traumatic experiences involving water which was the main source of his thalassaphobia
Bear: his parents died and he went to live in the woods with his aunt and then became ✨catholic✨
Tiger: xe likes magic.... yeah-
Don: his parents were assassinated by a member of the mafia that his dad was the leader of and thus he became overprotective of his little sister
Aran: literally got possessed by a demon from hell when he was like 13 which led to him developing an alternate personality who’s a cannibalistic serial killer-
Soda: escaped from home and for some reason had crossed paths with Bull and went on adventures with him
Bull: uhhh same with Soda but id also like to note that he’s trans
Macho: got bullied in school a lot because of his white hair, and also he’s the epitome of a douchebag
Sandman: “your dad’s coming back, he’s just getting milk” quoted by his mom
Anyways yeah all of this is pretty cring—
*commits Leon Kuwata*
King Hippo is Dead (complete)
I unfortunately had to cut the project short since I have no room left on my phone. However, this is just under half of the whole "The Heavy is Dead" video and I'm still proud of it.
actually, what would all the fighters be like when you ask for an autograph?
Aww! I like this idea.
Doc Louis: “An autograph? Shoot, I haven’t had anyone ask me that in a long time...Sure thing!”
Little Mac: “O-oh wait? Seriously? Sure just let me find a pen—“ He gets nervous and is humble about it, he wouldn’t expect someone to notice him.
Glass Joe: “I thought nobody would ask me that! But sure, I’ll give you one..” *is blushing a bit out of humility and nervousness* Yeah Joe’s nervous but humble when it comes to fans, they always show up when he least expects it.
Von Kaiser: Kaiser will only give you an autograph if you ask politely and provide him with something to write with. He doesn’t like annoying fans and doesn’t enjoy being well known but if you want an autograph from him, he’d be sure to give you one in private.
Disco Kid: He would be the one to write, “Follow your dreams! If you’re happy then you’re truly successful!” Or other cutesy cheesy quotes like that. He loves fans when he gets recognized.
King Hippo: He doesn’t write that well, so instead of signing his name he draws a big smiley face with a crown on it. Don’t worry, it’s authentic! He loves giving out autographs to fans, even with the small following he has in the US.
Piston Hondo: He’ll gladly sign anything you want him to. He’ll also write “あなたは一番です!” after his signature; Which means “You are number 1!” in Kanji.
Bear Hugger: Oh he’s all about the autographs, hell he doesn’t even mind a picture. He loves his fans, especially if they’re youngins, he loves to sign whatever you got for him.
Great Tiger: He doesn’t mind a quick picture as well as an autograph, he is very grateful to have fans. He also has AMMACULATE handwriting. Like—His cursive is so perfect.
Don Flamenco: He’s also one with really nice handwriting. He puts hearts after every sentence. But he’s willing to give you an autograph, he doesn’t mind. He knows that wherever he goes he’s going to get noticed, so he accepts it he kinda milks it a little and it almost goes to his head about how “famous” he is.
Aran: He loves giving out autographs more than anything. Mostly because he can get away with writing real dumb shit on your poster or whatever you have. If you’re lucky he’ll even snap a photo with you or if he thinks you’re cute.
Soda Popinski: Not really an autograph guy because he doesn’t know how to write an in English, but would love to take a picture with you! But if you’re insisting that you want an autograph, he’ll write “сода попинская” which is his name in Russian.
Bald Bull: He already dislikes it enough when he’s being followed by paparazzi and being noticed in any way in Turkey. So, he dislikes it when fans comes up to him asking for autographs. But his alternative to disappointment his real fans is that—You can send fan mail to him to his P.O. Box, and you can ask him for an autograph via mail. It’s way less physical interaction with fans, plus he also love reading fan mail.
Super Macho Man: lets be honest you’ve all been waiting for this man right here HE LOVES it when he gets noticed by his fans. He does it all, photos, autographs, hell he’ll even sign your shirt or something. Dude’s also always prepared—Like this man carries a sharpie or any writing utensil everywhere he goes.
Mr. Sandman: He isn’t a huge fan of being chased by paparazzi or fans over an autograph. His rule is, “If I sign for one, I have to sign for a whole crowd.” But if you catch him in a moment where he isn’t surrounded by people, he’ll give you one.
Aaaand now onto Super Punch Out!
Birdie Mac/Peter Punch: “Ah, sure I’ll give you one!”
Gabby Jay: “An autograph eh? How on earth did you know who I am? Ah well, an autograph it is then!”
Piston Hurricane: He’ll happily give you an autograph, he loves it when he gets approached by his fans.
Bob Charlie: More of a photo guy, he loves taking pictures with fans. But he won’t deny an autograph if insisted on.
Masked Muscle: He’s shy with fans, doesn’t like being approached but hates saying no to fans. He’ll give you one quietly and then he’ll go so he doesn’t get noticed by anyone else.
Heike Kagero: Loves giving out autographs to show off how nice his handwriting is. And he’s not wrong to brag either, it is really pretty to look at.
Mad Clown: “Step right up I suppose! I ain’t got nothing better to do...” The larger the crowd, the better—This dude is such an extrovert he thrives off the energy of his fans. He’ll be the one to make them form a line to get an autograph from him.
Narcis Prince: HATES it when fans approach him, he’ll shoo you off by just signing something really quickly and running off.
Hoy Quarlow: He’s really humble about meeting fans in general, so he’s more than happy to give you an autograph.
Rick Bruiser: He doesn’t mind autographs, he’s really humble with his fans about meeting them and such.
Nick Bruiser: He doesn’t like fans, but he tolerates the crowd—He expects it after all, though he wishes he could change it. It gets too much for him if he gets too overwhelmed.
