payman benz

I'm a comedy director and writer. I'll post my projects on here, but I'll mainly be posting bizarre things I find online. If you want to see my work, you can see it all at PaymanBenz.com. I love you.

[paymanbenz]

Robin Williams + Nick Offerman =

[blakegriff]

[paymanbenz]

CAN THE SEASON START ALREADY???

[paymanbenz]

Here's another sketch I directed on Key & Peele, featuring the hilarious Rob Riggle. I had so much fun with this one and Peter Atencio really let me run with it. When I first read this script, I fell in love with it because the stakes are so ridiculously low. The position Keegan's character is put in is so unfair and unnerving, so I wanted to give the entire piece an uncomfortable feeling. Rob's character is the type of boss that will fire people at the drop of a hat and I wanted that anxiety to come through. And Jordan's character is absolutely fascinating.

Charles Papert shot the shit out of this sketch. Nicholas Monsour edited the shit out of this sketch. Richard W. Davis knocked the opening steadicam shot out of the ballpark.

Lastly, the bagels are for sales associates only, ok?

[paymanbenz]

I KNEW IT. I am legally a psychic. 

[paymanbenz]

Hey @chexmix, you should make a commercial set at a wedding where everybody's munchin' on Chex Mix, then a little girl approaches a little boy who is munchin' on Chex Mix and asks for some. At first he says no, she frowns, then he feels guilty and says "Hey, wait..." She turns around and he puts his hand in the bag and pulls out two pretzels fused together like this one, he puts it on her finger like an engagement ring, she smiles and they eat Chex Mix together while the wedding is in full swing around them. You are welcome for the awards you'll win with this commercial. Also, you are delicious.

[paymanbenz]

Severed Head Warriors. I had a really great time directing this one. 

[paymanbenz]

My favorite sketch I directed on Key & Peele. Amazing performances by Keegan, Jordan & Bo Burnham. Edited masterfully by Nicholas Mansour.

[laughingsquid]

Hannibal Buress Releases His ‘Secret’ Audition for ‘The Daily Show’ to Promote His New Show ‘Why?’

[paymanbenz]

Watch the premiere tomorrow night at 10:30pm right after the season premiere of Key & Peele at 10pm. So much comedy.

[comedycentral]

Call everyone. Tell them Key & Peele is back with a new season, tomorrow at 10/9c.

[paymanbenz]

One time I kissed a hooker on top of her head

Just remembered that one time in Las Vegas, I rejected a hooker who propositioned me inside a casino. I told her she didn't need to do that for a living, gave her a hug and kissed her on top of her head. hahahahahaha My god, I'm an idiot.

She walked away very upset, loudly yelling "Ugh!!!" Less than 90 seconds later, I saw her leave arm-in-arm with a very drunk middle-aged man wearing a dirty softball uniform. I like to think they're married now.

[paulscheer]

Check out @caseyrosewilson as a disturbed Celine Dion on #ScheeRL on @buh (photo @nathanielwood)

View more Paul Scheer on WhoSay

[paymanbenz]

His tan has gone too far. At this point, Dallas Raines is legally in black face.

[paymanbenz]

Teachers scripts are locked. We begin shooting in 10 days. 9 episodes in 7.5 weeks with no hiatus. Wheeee! So damn excited. Premiering this summer on TV Land.

[paymanbenz]

Intuition is a beautiful thing

The most amazing things have happened to me in Kauai. I've had no plans. I've just followed my gut and drove around randomly each day. I did some research before coming here so I could understand the lay of the land but I refused to plan a single thing.

The other day I asked a girl with a ton of tattoos if she could recommend a local artist because I wanted to get Dude's name over my heart. So this morning I drove to the place and the artist happened to pull up a minute after me and had a slot open right then. We get to chatting and not only is he from LA, but he lived a block away from my place. He asks me what I want and why, and he was stunned.

He lifts the sleeve on his shirt and he has a tattoo on his arm of his dog that passed away, along with its name. His dog's name was Dude.

Follow your instincts. They'll never steer you wrong.

I'm not going to post a pic of the tattoo so you'll have to wait until my bodybuilding calendar comes out never.

[paymanbenz]

Here's a new installment of the East West Bowl (Pro Edition) that I directed as part of the amazing Key & Peele Super Bowl Special. It premieres this Friday night at 10pm/9pm Central on Comedy Central.

If you've ever seen NFL Network or any other NFL pre-game coverage, this special is going to make you laugh so much. I directed all the pre-taped sketches, but watch the entire special because the in-studio stuff they did is phenomenal.

Fun Fact: The only real player I directed in person was the last player in the video. Everyone else was shot all over the country with different crews and I directed the players via FaceTime. Weird but cool.

[baseballcardvandals]

Hey guys, EVERYBODY knows that the world’s most accomplished people spend most of their time DRESSING FOR SUCCESS and LAUGHING AT THEIR PHONE. So really there are just two things that you should do RIGHT NOW if you want to enjoy a long life of PLEASURE and PROSPERITY:

1) Iron your dang clothes for once in your life. 

2) Follow Baseball Card Vandals on Instagram and Twitter. 

That’s it! Now where else would you find such WISE WISDOM on a WEIRD WEDNESDAY?

WE LOVE YOU BYE. 

[paymanbenz]

This Tumblr never disappoints. So good.

[paymanbenz]

RIP Dude. 2000-2015. He was the best and sweetest dog I've ever known and I was lucky to have him in my life.

Thank you all for the very sweet comments, messages, texts and phone calls today. Today was a day I've feared for 14 1/2 years and the love from my friends, family, and even strangers has softened the blow. Anyone who met Dude knew that he was special. A friend of mine put it best today, "Even dog haters loved Dude." That was true. My parents were mortified of dogs and less than 24 hours after meeting him, he was asleep on my mom's lap after playing soccer with my dad for a few hours.

Although we never had a conversation, Dude and I completely understood each other. He's been with me since before I decided to be a director, and having his unconditional love (and farts) made it a lot easier, and made me work harder. I've busted my ass for the last 9 years in Los Angeles, not only for my survival but for Dude's. And as his health problems accumulated over the years and the medical bills piled up, I had to work harder and take on too many projects when I shouldn't have.

The responsibility of having a pet to take care of made me not only work harder, but it kept me focused and away from distractions. I've never been much of a drinker anyways, but knowing I had to take care of Dude meant I would come home early on nights when I'd go out. Over the last few years as his health declined, I didn't want to regret not spending enough time with him when he passed, so I abandoned my social life and stayed home with him as much as I could. My work kept me away enough as it is, so it wasn't fair to him to be home alone at night. Also, he was a JOY to be around so it was fun hanging out with him all the time. He was so sweet and quiet, and he just wanted to hang out with anyone and everyone. He never barked, unless I left the house abruptly without saying goodbye, or when he'd see animals on TV and would want to play with them. What a rascal.

In the end, he was deaf, he didn't see well, he had an off-and-on limp and he kept fighting. But alas, it was cancer that got him. I could have had them pump him with even more meds, keep him overnight and do another surgery, but the few extra months I'd be giving him would not be pleasant. It was his time. He deserved to go out peacefully, and he did. He was my boy.