Aging is beautiful. You grow into yourself, and instead of searching for the woman you want to be, you start living as the woman you are. As an advice to girls and young women I really can’t stress this enough: there is more. More to learn, more to experience, more to see, more to be. Don’t settle. Never loose sight of yourself. Don’t make your life rigid by adjusting to someone else, at least not right now. Because you, you will flow through life and become.
synopsis: Prince Jimin was not only the heir to his father’s eastern throne—your neighboring kingdom—but he was also promised to the daughter of your husband, the king of the south. Jimin was the catch of the dynasty, and the envy of most; but behind closed doors however, Jimin was yours to have any way a true queen like you pleased.
So was it wrong? Royally.
Did you want to stop? Never.
It had been too long ago to remember the last time you cared about anything in your life, you didn’t have to. Your sole purpose was to be a pretty face the people of your country could attach alongside the word queen, not that they cared about that either, so why should you?
It all started from the day you were old enough to realize what a princess’ reality was to be, and to which you declared you did not want to be married. You felt like it would limit you from doing things you wanted to do, and you saw no coherent reasoning in giving yourself away to anyone. Running your own kingdom seemed like a responsibility you would one day obtain of course, but it felt too soon. Your home was the North, and it was the kingdom you believed would support you when the time came to reign and for you to support them back as their rightful queen. You truly believed this, that was until news broke out that your life was going to be flipped to an unexpected, and very much unwanted reality.
Despite your early life declaration; to the honor in other’s eyes and the unjust betrayal in yours, the King of the South had set his sights on you and decided you were to marry him.
The North, your home, even your own parents did little to stop this as to them it presented to be a mutual beneficial agreement, but if it had been up to you, you would’ve gone to war before marrying the likes of the Southern King. From the moment you saw his greasy smile and pale blue eyes, you instantly disliked him. He was as fake as the painted mole on his left cheek.
But of course Kings being Kings, with their inarguable and apparently higher status than your own, they were not to be said no to. You hadn’t been crowed queen of your kingdom yet and the power to decide was still in the hands of your father. Despite your ravaging protests, one raven-delivered letter was all it took for your fate to be sealed and out of your reach forever. Shipped off from your beloved North and sent to the hell that was down south. At least that’s what it felt like with all the damn humidity that made your corset stick uncomfortably to your breasts.
You never grew accustomed to the South, it was all backwards to you. The people, the air, even the wine tasted differently. You loved your home in the North, but after being practically sold from it against your will, you felt you no longer had any ties to it. Meaning you never wished to speak to your parents again, although there were times you heart ached to see your mother again. Marrying the already crowed King and the fact that you weren’t crowned Queen of the North, you could no longer consider yourself a part of Northern Royalty, only the South. Your so called marriage was even worse. It had been a handful of years since the King had made you his 4th wife, loosing interest rather quickly because of how many times you rejected him. He wasn’t happy about it but he usually listened to you, but you knew it was not out of the kindness of his heart. You realized then that he hadn’t asked for your hand in marriage for you to be his beloved wife, but only to have the promising title that went along with you. He hated being rejected but he also hated confrontations meaning he always avoided situations he considered unpleasantries. Some king. You weren’t there to provide an heir either, but you also weren’t their to provide submissiveness as far as you were concerned. The king busied himself with his many newly awarded mistresses leaving you be. He would’ve been happier having you as another one of his courtesans of course, but being the Princess of the North meant the King needed to compromise. Which apparently to him and your father, marriage ‘sufficed’. The southern people held no esteem or pleasant judgment whatsoever towards you. Kingdoms didn’t tend to mix with each other as it was viewed as a waste of perfectly eligible maidens from their own kingdoms. In their eyes you were the northern slut that had seduced their beloved king, yet still you no longer cared about their chauvinist opinions. You did what you wanted as long as it didn’t infringe upon the King’s image…publicly that is.
Once a princess, a forbidden fruit, a goddess even. These fetished names had no effect on you at all…unless of course they were said by the lips of the only man in the four kingdoms who would one day have you, heart and soul. Park Jimin.
The day you first laid eyes on Jimin still played vividly within your most precious memories. The annual kingdom ball was ritually hosted by the South. The gardens of the southern kingdom were infamous all thoughout the land, the beaches were warm and the air clung conveniently enough in ways as too provide excuse to take your clothes off quicker.
All the reasons to entertain yourself, but frankly you were bored out of your mind! You sat on the Queen’s throne with a glass of raspberry wine dangling between your fingers. Technically you were not supposed to be drinking as it could ‘impair your ability to bear children’. Those idiotic court maidens spewed whatever vomit they wanted and called it royal advice. As if you’d listen to a bunch of prejudicely pampered pigeons.
The southern king was off somewhere as to be expected, surely with his precious daughter. An angelic creature in front of her father and anyone of importance, but behind that carefully built façade, lied a vicious manipulating Medusa you learned to avoid at every possible chance. She wasn’t much younger than you, another addition to the many unexplainable reasons she absolutely despised you. You knew very well she’s tried multiple times to convince the King to be rid of you; if only you weren’t as valuable as an ally as she was as a schemer. And really, what the southern king cared about more than anything was his reputation. Nothing could taint that more than a scandalous divorce.
And so, sitting just as you currently were, watching the mass of various dukes, lords, duchessses, princes and princesses, all chatting away meaninglessly about how powerful they all were and how they should get together for wine and bask in their undoubted wealth, blah blah. When really it was in those gatherings that ambitious social climbers began plotting away against the higher ups trying to overpower one another. Money was all these people knew and you hated every second you were forced to be part of it all. You had just about decided you’ve had enough to call it a night and return to your chambers when one of the royal guards announced the arrival of the East Royalty, peaking your interest.
He was accompanying his father, The King of the East, and his cousin Duke Park Bo-gum.
The Parks’ were notoriously known for their valuable and most enviable blue-blood lineage. Their name had reigned the East as far back as the scrolls supposedly told. Their presence not only dropped the jaws of very powerful men, but a certain article of clothing adorned by women as well. All the royals of the court turned their heads when they entered into the large courtyard surrounded by tower-sized rose bushes and huge marble pillars planted at each end of the room. You had heard of their unarguable beauty by the whispers of court servants and young royals, both men and women alike. Even you, you’d seen and lied with beautiful men throughout your years in the south but, when your eyes locked upon Jimin’s hypnotizing gaze from across the courtyard, your corset had suddenly tightened several notches than before, causing the smallest of gasps to escape your lips.
He wore a breathtaking outfit adorned by exquisite lace and intricate designs sewed expertly over the top of the fabric. It fit him like a glove, exentuating the smooth curves of his shoulders, chest and his firm behind. His hair had been combed to elegant perfection, and the brief image of your hands running through it roughly, making it fall over his eyes had you swallowing instinctively. He follows his family around the great hall but his eyes only follow you, gracefully moving his body as if floating.
Your at the edge of your seat at this point trying not to lose the sight of him amongst the sea of people. Right when you think your about to see his lips turn into a daring smirk, you’re abruptly interrupted by a woman’s small voice.
“Y-your highness?”
Your head spins to the side to find the face of your maiden Emily. She flinches when you look at her; you never understood why she did that. You liked Emily, she was one of the few people…actually the only human being you were fond of in the entire kingdom. Yet it was like she walked on eggshells whenever she was around you. You wondered if she was like that with other people too. Emily was the personal maiden assigned to you when you first arrived. She was a small framed girl with grey eyes that were impossible to read. She must have been only a handful of years older than you, but she didn’t talk about her past or her life in general. You’ve never even heard her laugh, she just did her duties carefully and asked politely to be dismissed once she was done. She was extremely closed off but you still appreciated her greatly. She knew exactly how you liked your tea, extra honey, and she would wait until after whoever had laid in your bed the previous night to leave before walking into the room discreetly and announcing your morning bath was ready.
“What is it Emily?” You ask with a smile, feeling a little bad for hoping she would leave you alone so you could get back to eye-fucking this, Jimin, Prince of the East.
“It’s the King my lady, he wants to speak to you right away.” She shifts her head awkwardly when she speaks as if not knowing where to look.
You stifle a groan of annoyance handing Emily the cup of wine in your hand. Swatting the front of your dress half-hazzardly you close your eyes and let out a short huff,
“Where is he?”
*
*
“Ah, finally. I was wondering where you had run off to.” His laugh is forced and plastic, purposely loud for others to hear.
You take the king’s extended hand only because you know he does this when people are looking. A half-assed attempt to show you two are at least remotely acquainted in some way…oh yeah, married.
“You and I both know that isn’t true.” You say through smiling teeth. You could see the royal church members from the corner of your eye, watching your every move and so you played along. There’d be hell to pay (literally) if the royal church suspected any foul demonstrations that implied the king’s marriage was not in order as they pleased, or so that was what they said to believe. In reality they were only there to spy on royal members to find incriminating evidence to later blackmail royals in order to receive money. Corruption was everywhere, becoming a game you had to learn to play, and fast if you were going to survive a day in this fucked world.
The king’s teeth showed through the hairs of his beard as he smiles synthetically, all for show once again. You two hardly saw each other let alone spoke to one another.
“You’re right I don’t care. But right now I have to speak to important royal members and I need you to-“
“-Let me guess, show my cleavage long enough to distract them from the narcissistic heathen you really are?” The pettiness was palpable in your voice, but you were careful to not be in earshot of anyone else, and you made sure you kept smiling.
He laughs once again and you swear there isn’t a sound on this earth that could annoy you as much as it does. He leans in closer to your ear, “Don’t embarass me or I’ll make sure you regret it.”
You pull your hand out of his grip forcefully before whispering back between gritted teeth, “You wouldn’t dare.”
“Well if it isn’t the King of the South!” A deep and gravely voice breaks through the icey glare off between you and the king.
The King of the East approaches the two of you confidently. You know it’s him because of the eastern broach clipped onto his left shoulder. Behind him you find the Duke Bogum, but to your shear disappointment no Prince Jimin.
Your eyes dart around you quickly in search of him and you shut out all noise without realizing. It isn’t until a heavy hand pushes you forward that you realize the King had spoken to you.
“This is (y/n).” The king of the south says.
You’ve grown accustomed to being presented this way that you now choose to ignore it. You were in every right a Queen and you knew it and so did he, but since the southern king had the male intellect of a spoiled 8 year-old child, he presented you like a prize he had won or possessed. He wishes.
The Kind of the East turns to the Duke and presents him to you and the king. He bows to the man standing next you and then smiles as he bows to you as well. It seems they teach manners in the East.
“An honor to meet you King Park, Duke Bogum.” You bow to both men in front of you.
“The honor is all mine, Queen (Y/N)” The Duke smiled dashingly.
“I seem to have lost the whereabouts of my son Jimin. I never can tell what goes on in that head of his, men will be men am I right?”
Both Kings laugh loud and heavily and you have to force yourself from rolling your eyes at that last comment. However the mentioning of the Prince does make your eyes dart around again as you begin wondering where he is too. You’re so distracted that you almost miss what the southern king mentions.
“-was hoping that our children could be introduced to one another sometime as well, yes?”
“Splendid idea, before we leave tonight it is.”
You realized you needed to find this Prince before the Princess could sink her poisonous claws into him. You were going to find Jimin even if it took you all night, but you knew from the way he looked at you moments ago, it wouldn’t be long until you found eachother.
The king’s walk off practically hand in hand, pathetic really. But you’re left alone facing the very handsome Park Bogum.
The Duke was charming in every way a true gentlemen should be. He even asked for a dance which you gladly accepted. It wasn’t everyday you socialized with people who didn’t seem to judge your very existence. His voice was pleasant and he was easy to talk with. But as great as the small talk was, you couldn’t deny your mind was elsewhere.
“I’m sorry you didn’t get the chance to meet my cousin your highness. He told me he was rather looking forward to meeting you.”
Your eyes shoot straight up to his, excited to be talking about the Prince, you were a little caught off guard but you feign innocent intrigue.
“Why do you say that, Duke Bogum?”
“Well he was practically bombarding me with questions in regards to you, your highness. I suppose his curiosity got the best of him.” He smiles before he realizes he sounds inappropriate and visibly panics. “Oh but respectfully so of course.”
He really was charming but you needed more details on Jimin and you weren’t about to sidetrack the conversation.
“Is that so?” The Duke had long since been leading you in the dance and you were thankful for this as your mind could not have been focusing on where your feet were supposed to be going.
“I believe this cousin of yours has now intrigued my humble interest, Duke Bogum-” You attempt your best innocent smile, and when the Duke returns the gesture you begin to ask the question you’ve been dying to know the answer to since the second you were torn away from Jimin’s sight. “-would you happen to know where I might find this Pri—“
“-Dear cousin!”
Your eyes turn towards the silky voice that presents itself before you. He stood confidently as he spoke, and his eyes danced with equal fun and mischief. Your chest thumped unusually fast to your surprise and you quickly swallow any revealing hints away.
“My father wishes to see you.” Jimin smiles at the taller man knowingly to which Bogum replies with an arched brow.
“Funny, I believe it was you dear cousin, the king was specifically looking for.” If this was a subtle challenge, Jimin wasn’t one bit fazed, his smile only widening further.
“Yes well, we both know my father never can decide who he wants to see next.” Towards the end of the sentence, Jimin’s eyes briefly—almost too briefly that you don’t catch it— shift to look right at you, grinning radiantly.
You don’t know where you get the confidence to smile back but you don’t stop yourself there. “That’s alright Duke Bogum you may go, I happen to know from experience Kings aren’t fond of waiting.”
The Duke and Jimin exchange one final glance before the other bows politely and turns to leave, finally leaving you alone with the man you’ve wanted to be with from the moment you laid eyes on him, and he on you.
“Your highness,” When Jimin turns to you and your eyes meet, you swear you momentarily loose your breath. The damn corset was not helping either. Gods you were ready to take the thing off of you. “I hope you do not think of me as improper for interrupting your dance with the Duke to offer another one, with me?” He smiles almost shyly for a moment and you realize this Prince might not be as confident as he lets on, but this does nothing to sway you, in fact you find it all the more attractive.
“Not at all.” You say smiling up at him through your lashes.
That was when he told you his name, and that was the moment you knew he would be a hard one to forget, which just made it all the more thrilling.
You slip one hand into Jimin’s warm palm and wrap the other hand around his shoulder. The feeling of Jimin’s hand hold onto your waist securely made your insides heat up, not to mention excite you profusely.
He sways you to the melody of the music never once breaking eye contact.
You watch his eyes shift around your face studying you as you do the same to him. Your eyes finding interest on his beautifully shaped lips, just the right shade of pink and thickness that has you aching for a taste. You shouldn't (Y/N), not him. You tell yourself as you try and shake off the feeling. Jimin was the Prince and you were married, this could end badly, very badly.
You exhale slowly looking back up at him and notice his eyes have darkened.
“The Duke tells me you were asking about me.” You say a little breathless but you quickly conceal it.
“Pardon me your highness, but how can anyone not?” His voice is smooth and low and seemingly in complete control. You worry you might seem too obvious too soon.
“May I ask what you wanted to know?”
“Just a few things about the Queen from the North.” He says without hesitance.
Queen from the North? No one called you that as technically they weren’t allowed. In marriage the woman typically lost the rights from her past, but again since you thought kingdoms didn’t usually mix and on top of everything, you were a princess. What was and wasn’t allowed was a fuzzy gray area of unknown limitations. Not only that but the whole marriage that happened between the North and the South was actually kept quiet from the East and Weastern kingdoms for a short while. You figured it was because of negotiations or something. Still, if people were to think you were not completely loyal to the South and still considered yourself part of the North, accusations as far as treason could be made against you. Wouldn’t someone like the Prince of the East, heir to his own throne know that by calling you a northern queen, it could really piss off some powerful people if they were to hear.
Jimin must’ve have noticed your discomfort because his face changed suddenly and he leaned in closer.
“I apologize my Queen if I went too far.”
My Queen? Your mind reels trying to figure out if you had heard him correctly. People were only supposed to call royals from their own kingdoms ‘my’ anything. Jimin was from the East, the only woman he could call my Queen was the Queen of the East, not the South. There was no way a prince wouldn’t know that, unless he was doing it on purpose. But why would he do that? Something wasn’t adding up and you needed to clarify a few things with Jimin and you needed to do it in a place where hundreds of influential people couldn’t listen in on your conversation.
Jimin had not stopped examining your expressions and his eyes told you it wasn’t just a slip of his tongue, but he doesn’t say anything to you. You scan around you briefly before you whisper to him,
“Find my maiden Emily. She’ll take you to my quarters without being seen. Meet me there.”
Jimin doesn’t say anything and for a second you think you may have read the whole situation wrong, but when he nods once, bows and walks away quickly you turn and do the same.
*
*
It was wrong, wrong, all wrong, but it felt right just the same. You were meant to just talk with Jimin and find out if something was happening that you didn’t know about.Although to a certain extent you did speak of vital details that still had your mind twisting and turning. But you had somehow allowed for things to escalate, and now you were no longer in control of the moans that came from your mouth as Jimin attacked every inch of your hot skin with his irresistible mouth.
He held you flush against the wall with your legs wrapped around his middle in a tight grip. His hands were exploring your body, searching for whatever he could get his hands on the first and seemingly amazed by every inch of you. He smelled of roses and the scent was hazing your thoughts. Mouths open, and cores igniting, your breaths becoming raged and quick.
“Jimin, the bed.” You breathe out unevenly and Jimin responds by carrying swiftly over to the soft silk sheets of your bed. His mouth once again attacks yours with hungry groans coming from deep within him. He lifts himself up onto his knees as he stares down at your face and frame, running his palm over the exposed skin of your chest and cleavage. Your breasts were pushed up but entrapped by the tightness of your corset, and so in one brisk move, Jimin grabs your hips before flipping your over to your front. You remove the clip sustaining your hair up, letting it tumble down in soft waves as Jimin begins unweaving your corset ribbons. He places wet kisses down your spine as he makes progress down your back.
“So-beautiful-“ Jimin speaks in between kisses. Lifting your torso upwards, you splay your hands on the large wooden backboard of your bed. Jimin continues to unravel your garments, leaving wet and eager kisses onto your neck and shoulder. When you feel the last ribbon being undone you stand up on your feet and turn to face Jimin. He looks amused as he stares up at you standing on your bed, he leans back and watches as you slowly drape the bunching fabric of lace and silk travel down your body.
Composure coming undone as Jimin’s eyes devour you whole. Eyes lowering down you notice the tent that had suddenly formed in his pants. Your fingers twitch to touch him but you resist the strong temptation. Leaning back into the wall, you reach for your glass of wine and teasingly slow bring it to your lips to drink.
“Take of your clothes.” You gesture your finger lazily at Jimin and he smirks wickedly but nonetheless obeys to your commands. It’s been a while since a night had brought so much excitement for you. Jimin did that.
“As you wish.” Slowly he unbuttons the outer jacket to his outfit but becomes inpatient with his shirt underneath as he rips down the buttons, exposing his muscular chest.
Your knees weaken and you give in, dropping down onto the bed carefully making sure to not break eye contact.
Jimin smiles and your mouth waters at the sight of him; gorgeous and glowing under the fiery light of your bedroom. Running a single digit across his collarbone you watch as he closes his eyes and his chest rises and falls increasingly fast.
“Tell me what you want.” Jimin whispers in a silk tone.
“You.” You say with no hesitation. It was the truth, the simple truth that you wanted Jimin. Something in the pit of your stomach flared in warning that this would not be like any other night, with any other man. It was a fact that Jimin was not just some man, he was a prince, the successor of the East kingdom. It wasn’t wise for you to become entangled with the likes of Jimin. Danger was written all over this, but didn’t that just make it all the more dangerously delicious?
“What do you want to do to me?” He asks breathlessly.
You ghost your lips over his plush lips before whispering. “Everything.”
You reach for one of the thick ribbons that had once held your dress to your body and slowly drag it upwards on Jimin’s body. He watches you curiously with dancing excitement in his eyes. Jimin’s responses emboldened you beyond belief, which is why you had the guts to bring the ribbons up to his eyes but stopping just before you went any further. The silent asking of permission passed between the both of you and you wait for Jimin to respond. As much as you liked to play, you would never do anything that didn’t bring pleasure to the both of you.
Jimin nods and brings his face to meet with the outstretched ribbon in your hands. You gently tie it to the back of his head, teasingly dragging your fingers over small areas of exposed skin your fingers brushed against. You knew his senses were now heightened because of his blindfolded eyes. You place your hand onto his chest and push back until he falls flat on your bed. His lips were parted as he quietly pants, waiting for you to make your next move. You hook your fingers into the waistband of his trousers and pull down. Jimin lifts his hips aiding your ministrations and the muscles of his abdomen flex beautifully against the light. The small dips and mounds that carved his skin fascinated you, everything about Jimin fascinated you beyond reason, so much so it scared you.
***
You pour yourself another glass of wine as you pace around your room. You stand near the fireplace staring into the hot flames, your mind running a thousand miles per minute.
Was there something you didn’t know about, and Jimin did? Why did you have the feeling it had something to do with your marriage? Why was it kept a secret? You know marriages between two kingdoms were uncommon but why go through the trouble of concealing it? You recall your parents back when you still lived in the North discussing in another room not knowing you were listening to them. They were whispering but you remember your mother asking your father why he had let the King of the South have you. He replied it was part of business. Business.
The thought of your father only thinking of you as collateral damage in a business deal hurt, a lot. Which was why you didn’t mind them never coming to the kingdom gatherings like the one from today. You figured they didn’t want to see you anymore and you didn’t want to see them just the same.
The sound of the heavy door opening breaks your train of thought. You turn just as Jimin walks in searching for you. You don’t understand why you feel the way you do, your heart was racing at the sight of a man you merely met today. You needed to compose yourself, this was not something you were used to. Not only that but there were questions you needed answers to and you were not about to ruin it all on account of you spiked libido.
“Your highness I just want to say, I meant no disrespect from what I said, it wasn’t my–
“–Why did you say it? Why did you call me your queen? You do know you could’ve gotten us in a lot of trouble if someone heard you?” Your voice was low but demanding.
“Yes but I–” Jimin starts but your mouth was moves rapidly as words kept flooding out.
“Is something going on? Do you know something?” You pause at Jimin staring at you, he seems to be considering his words very carefully now. He obviously doesn’t want to say the wrong thing and scare you off.
“I don’t know. I don’t know much, which is why I need your help your highness.” You search for any hint in Jimin’s eyes that says he is not being honest, but you find nothing of the sort, only brown eyes looking undecipherable but sincere, and beautiful.
“How can I help?”
*
*
As you laid in bed deep in thought, Emily was making the final touches on the bed comforter. You weren’t the type of girl to sleep with a man twice in a row. Things got too complicated and dangerous you if you did. But Jimin was a whole other story. Once you got a taste you knew you wanted nothing more than to see him again and you were determined to do so.
“Emily?”
“Y-yes my lady?”
“When will the royals have another get together? Like they did today, I mean?”
“I suppose this coming week, your highness.”
You jolt up into sitting position with a loud gasp, making Emily jump backwards.
“Next week?!” You say with your fingers coming up to your mouth.
“Y-yes your highness.” Emily’s large grey eyes are round as globes blinking nervously.
“But why?”
“Well, n-next week is the royal harvest festival. Royal members from all four kingdoms are to join in.”
Your mouth drops when you remember what the harvest festival means. A full week of food, music, dancing and drinking. The harvest festival is one of the rare times the commoners are welcome to join and royals from all across the land as they come to stay in the southern castle for the duration of the week long festivities.
A whole week! Days and nights! Ample opportunities to see Jimin again. This time you both had a plan. You were going to find out what was really going on within the four kingdoms.
You hadn’t noticed you had zoned out completely, the sight must have been worrisome, especially to Emily, after all you were smiling at nothing like a lunatic while sitting up right on your bed.
“Your highness…should I get you some tea?”
*
*
A/N: Ah i’m sorry about the unexpected hiatus, I finally fixed my masterlist ! this has been in my drafts for a while and I wanted to finally post it! I know the formatting is a little strange but I just went with it and I hope it’s not to confusing <3 there will be updates on this eventually I promise. Much love always ! -P
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