Manon Blackbeak Apologist @pergaminaa - Tumblr Blog

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Here is the Manorian playlist I finally finished lol. The possibilities are endless but certain songs just give me very strong Manorian vibes I couldn't ignore them.

These are mostly nsfw but since when are these two sfw? anyway, here is the playlist~

#booklr #books and reading #manon blackbeak #throne of glass #tog #dorian havilliard #manon x dorian #manorian #playlist #spotify music #my playlist #spotify #manon blackbeak and dorian haviliard will be the death of me #i'm okay with it tho #i love them too much to actually care #anyway this is just a feeble attempt and capturing their vibe #you know how they are #just lots of sex and can't really keep off of each other #so insane of them if you ask me #the whole world was going to end and they're just... being like that #i'm so happy they found each other tho #they can heal each other #and my girl manon is not alone and certainly not a monster because there is this man who is going to love her no matter what #ugh i need to shut up now before I start crying #oops too late THE TEARS ARE OUT #god i hate being on my period I just can't control my emotions at all????#Spotify

No but i actually need an au where Tristan insists that Lothian stays with him and not return to the Blackbeak keep to have their child.

They both are alive and well, and Manon is born to loving parents, who will love her unconditionally and teach her how to be a fair queen. She will grow up knowing of her people’s history, and she will have so many plans on how to rebuild the wastes and make it a proper home for the witches. She will think of ways to make alliance with the Ironteeth witches and perhaps they all can live together and move on past their bloody history

Please I just need a version where she experiences love from her parents because this one thing will reshape her entire personality she was robbed from so much

#throne of glass #booklr #books and reading #manon blackbeak #tog #dorian havilliard #tristan crochan #lothian blackbeak #just thinking of those possibilities is making me sad #she could have had a whole different life #but it was all taken away from her #instead she grew up with a monster who terrorized her her entire life #I mean even if her parents died and Glennis took over raising her #Manon’s life would be different because Glennis is kind and gentle and definitely wouldn’t engage in child torture like the blackbeak #matron did. but we can’t have anything good i guess Manon had to grow up like that #the poor woman couldn’t recognize a kind gesture even if it hit her in the face #that’s why she was crashing out with Dorian she just felt soooo confused #it’s funny at first but then you realize why she’s like this and it just makes you feel sad all over

Yes people love to talk about the princess who loved her kingdom but im here mourning the princess who never knew she had a kingdom or a legacy. she was single handedly destroying everything and everyone related to that kingdom because she didn’t know who she really was and was manipulated into becoming the weapon that ensured none of her people stayed alive even if she arrived at her kingdom

I still mourn the queen who arrived at her kingdom without anyone she loves by her side, because they all sacrificed themselves so that she can return to her kingdom and rule it

#throne of glass #booklr #books and reading #manon blackbeak #tog #dorian havilliard #manorian #manon x dorian #aelin ashryver galathynius #nvm me i spent a few hours crying (not related to this) and idk I’ve been in a sad mood #then i went on instagram and it’s full of that one line and i just thought of my girl and here we are #im not crying this time lmao my head already hurts and i feel sluggish #but im crying on the inside just the same #Manon deserved so much better omg #she was robbed of so much not just her parents #like she’s the actual fucking queen??? hello???? and the poor woman didn’t know this for over a hundred years????#she has no memories or attachments to anything because she never had it at least aelin has memories of her parents and kingdom #she has 8 years of that while Manon had nothing because her mom died soon after she was born #my poor poor girl she really deserved so much better

Manon can't swim???

I am a very concerned lifeguard right now

Yeah in modern au she can’t swim at all rip

she never learned and when she was young she was nearly drowned by her grandmother so she just hates being in any sort of water because she vividly remembered drowning so yeah (she doesn’t remember that all she can recall is the drowning itself her brain completely blocked the part where her grandmother kept pushing her underwater until she couldn’t breathe and left her there to die)

But there is no worry there because she won’t be close to the water in any case so she won’t be having any drowning or near drowning incidents

#throne of glass #booklr #books and reading #manon blackbeak #tog #dorian havilliard #manorian #manon x dorian #blackbeak matron #Manon was around like five or six so she kinda remembers it but not all the details #so for now she’s safe because she just doesn’t go near water so she’s good #she has no desire to learn tho #being around water like that makes her nervous anyway so she prefers to keep a safe distance

Modern au

Since it’s been getting so hot lately this is how I think Dorian will handle it.

Like, Manon can’t deal with the heat at all. She overrated easily as she is prone to fainting due to the heat so Dorian doesn’t take any chances with it. Not only that, but Manon also burns easily so being outside while the sun is at peak is a no-no.

Normally people try to cool off in a swimming pool or so. But Manon doesn’t because she can’t swim and hates being around water anyway.

But Dorian is determined and he wants a solution to this problem because he needs Manon to cool off with water away from any source of sunlight. So he got one of those tanning pools and put it inside the house. There is no direct sunlight there, as it’s not deep at all so it’s completely safe. This way he can get main to cool off in the water without any of these issues arising.

(Pictures attached for clarification)

#throne of glass #booklr #books and reading #manon blackbeak #tog #dorian havilliard #manorian #manon x dorian #he’s the man of finding logical solutions to problems #he knows to keep Manon indoors with lots of fluids because she has a history of fainting in the heat #it scares him a lot and he doesn’t want a repeat of that Manon just can’t function in the heat #she starts malfunctioning and Dorian tries to avoid that his girlfriend’s lack of melanin means she won’t survive any sun exposure #so heat is bad and summer in general is very tough to survive #and since her drowning Manon really hates being in deep water plus she never learned swimming as a result #so being in any water body is a huge no so Dorian went on a search to find something he can use #and he did so now things are good because they are in water (too shallow) so no fear of drowning there #and he can keep it indoors so Manon is safe from the sun #so it works great for this heat

crawlerdonut

sjm catch me outside manon/elide was riGHT THERE

#im still angry about this #there is way all that was happening and they didn’t even kiss be ffr

Modern au

Manon becoming a mother was both wonderful and scary at the same time.

She has A LOT of trauma in her. Her own upbringing was very harsh and even as an adult who’s been in therapy and currently has very emotionally safe environment, is still haunted by that childhood.

This was one thing she didn’t want to pass down to her daughter. She reads emotions differently, that’s why she never wants to be angry at her daughter, she never wants to yell or raise her voice, never give out threats and come up with harsh punishments because having this kind of power gives her a high of sorts.

No, Manon wanted to be the opposite of that. She wanted to have nothing but love for her daughter. She wanted to love her, to enjoy every moment with her, to guide her through life without threats and consequences. She wanted her daughter to be her own independent person who will always be loved and accepted as she is. No room for pretense, or trying to be someone else. Manon wouldn’t have these impossible standards and stress her daughter out because she can’t meet them.

Not only that, because Manon was hurt by other people while she was growing up. She knows more than anyone that the world isn’t a safe place for a young girl to be all in her own with no one to look after her. This is something that continues to haunt her. Predators are everywhere and they know how to pick their victims and not be seen.

As a result, Manon is a little irrational when it comes to that. She doesn’t trust anyone to keep her daughter safe and she knows that danger is lurking around every corner. Some might say she’s irrationally overprotective, but she can’t help it. She remembers what happened to her, how it felt and continues to feel after all this time. She’d never wish this sort of thing on her child and she will do everything in her power to make sure her daughter is protected from these things.

#throne of glass #booklr #books and reading #manon blackbeak #tog #dorian havilliard #manorian #manon x dorian #overal she’s a great mom and her daughter knows it #she grew up being loved unconditionally and she actually considers Manon to be her best friend because she’s always been kind and gentle #she never felt she needs to hide anything from her #on the contrary whenever something is up Manon is the first person to know because her mama always got her back #sure she doesn’t like the overprotectiveness sometimes but it’s how things are #she tried Dorian and told him to convince Manon that it’s fine nothing is going to happen #but Dorian is always on Manon’s side because he knows of what she’s been through #he understands her fear and worry and he’d never invalidate it because yes it can actually happen and he’d never forgive himself if it does #but other than that things are great because while Manon was scared of motherhood at first #she turned out to be a great mom whose love for her child is unconditional and in abundance #their daughter knows it too because she was generally calm and didn’t cry a lot or through many tantrums #she was a happy baby and toddler because she grew up very secure in her parents love #so it really didn’t matter in the long run because yes there are things she didn’t like growing up but she knows her parents and mom #especially love her so much like she doesn’t have any memory of anyone of them hurting her or giving her any bad memories #Dorian is a bit more strict like he has no issues saying no and even ground his child but Manon doesn’t do that really #like if it’s needed Dorian steps up and does these things Manon doesn’t really because she’s terrified of accidentally traumatizing her #child like her grandmother did to her. she knows it’s not the same but deep down she can’t really do these things without recalling her own #abuse at the hands of her grandmother like it’s hard #and because of the trauma she still reacts negatively to many things #she doesn’t want her daughter to catch on these things so at times she just lets Dorian handle certain situations because he acts normal #she will just panic and most likely have a panic attack and honestly Manon doesn’t want her daughter to have those fears because of how #she’s reacting so let’s Dorian and the their child do these things together and not have any negative feelings about things

Modern au

Rumor has it Fenrys still has PTSD from the time he nearly accidentally killed Manon because he brought Dubai chocolate not knowing she’s deathly allergic to pistachios and that was one very eventful night he won’t forget.

#throne of glass #booklr #books and reading #manon blackbeak #tog #dorian havilliard #manorian #manon x dorian #fenrys moonbeam #listen Manon didn’t even ask what’s in it she just tried it and two minutes later she was unable to breathe #and it’s not really her fault she was raised in the notion that her medical issues are either made up (because she wants attention) or #she’s faulty and better get sent to medical facility until she’s ’fixed’ and this is the last thing she needs #so she never brings up these things out of fear and this ended up happening #but things are different now she’s with people who take these things seriously and her medical issues are never seen as a problem #and certainly not something to get punished for but it’s not easy to undo these things #Fenrys still feels bad tho because he thinks it’s his fault she almost died #and now he’s extra careful with any food he brings because he doesn’t want a repeat of that #but yes Manon wouldn’t even bring it up because food allergy= permanent which means she isn’t ‘right’ and she was degraded and shamed her #her whole life because of that. plus all the threats she received from her grandmother like she really terrorized her because at times #she’d actually leave her at some medical facility for DAYS and she’d make it clear it’s because Manon is not right and they need to fix her #so she just internalized this whole thing and believes it’s some sort of punishment #try to convince her it’s normal many people have food allergies and it’s okay but it was never okay and she can’t see it as such

I miss Manon so much

#throne of glass #booklr #books and reading #manon blackbeak #tog #dorian havilliard #manorian #manon x dorian #im not quiet im just… missing her so much I’ve been feeling so down #what do I do omg i need my girl

for now i will only allow messaging from people im following because there is a situation there and im done dealing with this

#won’t give any details but i just can’t deal with this anymore #so for now it’s only for people i follow until things change #i don’t want to be put off this blog but i was heading there

love-nuclear-babes

Life is simply Pre-Throne of Glass and Post-Throne of Glass

pergaminaa

yeah i literally im not the same person i was before reading this cursed series

#idk it changes you somehow

What do you think Manon’s favorite thing about Dorian is, and Dorian’s favorite thing about Manon?❤️

Honestly they love everything about each other lmao

To Manon, her favorite thing about Dorian is his compassion.

As someone who was raised on viewing emotions as weakness, seeing this side of Dorian tells her that it’s the opposite. This side of him is make him all the more powerful to her because it’s his compassion and dedication to those cares about.

It’s also about herself, she can see how he treats her because of that. He never belittles her or downplay her emotions. Even if she doesn’t think it’s important, Dorian wants her to speak about them and he’d always listen and give his advice when it’s needed.

It’s this side of him that gave her safety and security. She knows that no matter what it is, Dorian wouldn’t hurt her because of it. That sense of safety is what makes her try and speak more, express herself more and not feel on edge when she does that. Because Dorian will always listen, and he will always give her the safe space to feel her emotions and express them.

As for Dorian, he would have a hard time just picking one because he adores all of Manon lmao. But!!! He’s drawn to her fierce loyalty. Because more than anything, it tells him that his self-proclaimed cold hearted lover actually has a big heart and feels things deeply.

Manon isn’t easily swayed. When loves, she is all in. It’s not just about homes. Dorian can see this with her relationship with the thirteen, Abraxos and anyone she considers close.

Despite her cold exterior, Manon has a big soft heart and Dorian loves this side of her. Because deny it as she might, he can see all of those small things and he just… loves seeing her express herself in her own way.

#throne of glass #booklr #books and reading #manon blackbeak #tog #dorian havilliard #manorian #manon x dorian #I just love how they both love those side of each other #Dorian’s emotions make Manon feel safe #and Dorian’s loves how Manon is just… full of (suppressed) emotions and he’s here helping her become more comfortable with them

idk how to explain this but the last 200 pages of a court of mist and fury gave me so much anxiety I still haven’t picked up the rest of the series since I read the first two books in july

#personal #acotar #I’ve been meaning to but the anxiety is real yall #I wanted to continue but life got crazy with my dads sickness and how we were in the trenches for six months #I’m still having issues picking it up because of what actually happened in the book and also idk it’s not related but i always remember the #period between September and February and just physically cannot do it #i hope that I’ll be able to get over all of this and continue soon #I want to read the rest so badly but i have all of these emotions stuck in between so yeah #and i have no idea why!!! I’ve started so many series during that time period and i managed to finish them all #so it’s not memories that’s stopping me i think it’s just anxiety regarding the events in the books #or maybe July me was happier and she could actually enjoy them #but current me is unable to feel such joy so im saving it until i feel better #idk i think maybe #I’ll try again soon

lamenza

To whatever end, Fireheart.

Listen it breaks my heart that despite all the hate and cruelty Manon grew up with, if her parents were alive, she would have grown up with so much love and support.

Lothian and Tristan loved her from way before she was born. She was their hope for a better future and they couldn’t wait to meet her. They have already picked her name, knowing what role she will fulfill. Manon ‘beautiful queen’ (in Welsh) was going to be raised in so much love it was too good to be true.

The Matron seized control over her. She killed both parents (Lothian first, she wanted to shape the witchling into a ruthless unfeeling killer. She turned her against her own people and tried to quell any hope of Manon ever being anything her grandmother didn’t dictate.

Manon was subjected to horrific abuse and cruelty and this shaped her to be the person that she is. She was manipulated and brainwashed, her grandmother created entire narratives that she believed and honestly saw herself as this cold monstrous killer.

Just thinking of what she might have turned out like if her parents were alive and she grew up with them instead of her grandmother. She was robbed of so much but at the end, she was with her rightful family who would love her and never abuse her for being herself.

#throne of glass #booklr #books and reading #manon blackbeak #tog #dorian havilliard #manorian #manon x dorian #I was just thinking about Manon and Lothian #if she was alive I’m certain she’d take good care of Manon and give her all the love she couldn’t get from her own mother #and Tristan is the complete opposite he was raised on love so he will have plenty for his mate and daughter #but we couldn’t have that now could we #instead my baby girl had to suffer the entire series up until the grand finale #my heart breaks for her every day

I really like your posts. I hope you never stop posting and talking about Manorian. Lots of love ❤️❤️🫂🫂

aww thank you nonnie 🤍🤍🤍

I shall continue to make more posts because there is no getting enough of Dorian and Manon

#throne of glass #booklr #books and reading #manon blackbeak #tog #dorian havilliard #manorian #manon x dorian #asks #I can’t shut up about them lmao #thank you for this kind message you made my night!!

Modern au

Following up on the ask from yesterday, Dorian being in control is a major thing for him. He hated the unfairness of the way his father is, but his thoughts are rarely listened to, and he is often forced to agree on things he doesn’t want, but it’s out of his control.

So, Manon giving him all that control? It heals him and makes him feel centered. It isn’t just her handing everything to him. This action on her end, someone like Manon Blackbeak, is telling him that she fully trusts him to do the right thing, to make the right call. She doesn’t question his decisions because she trusts his insight. She knows he won’t hurt her or cause her any harm. So by giving up all control, Manon is telling Dorian that she sees him for who he is. The strong, capable, just man that he is. And her acting this way is what makes him feel better.

After a long day around his father, being with Manon is what fixes everything. Being around her heals him from the inside because what she’s showing him is that he matters and his voice is heard.

#throne of glass #booklr #books and reading #manon blackbeak #tog #dorian havilliard #manorian #manon x dorian #they both validate each other in their own way #that’s why they mean so much to each other #and with them it goes beyond sex it extends to all of these other things that they do between them #they both take care of each other #and this is what makes them perfect

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