Manon Blackbeak Apologist

raine | i read books and rant about them here | hyperfixation | romantasy whore | a side blog to @caitlynmeow

[pergaminaa]

Here is the Manorian playlist I finally finished lol. The possibilities are endless but certain songs just give me very strong Manorian vibes I couldn't ignore them.

These are mostly nsfw but since when are these two sfw? anyway, here is the playlist~

[pergaminaa]

Post by @pergaminaa

💬 0  🔁 0  ❤️ 8 · Lmao okay this is just a little extension to what happened with sims!manorian (had a long talk with a friend about it and I

Random tidbits (2)

There were challenges when it comes to being up in the mountains.

Dorian is aware of the abuse Manon suffers at the hands of her grandmother and he knows about the irrational fears she has because of that.

Dorian knows that nighttime can be challenging. They’re in the middle of the wilds and when the sun sets it is pitch dark outside. He keeps the curtains closed, and he makes sure the cabin is well lit. He does keep the lights on during the night just in case Manon wakes up during the night. If she needs to get water from the kitchen or just to find him because she tends to wake up during the night.

At times things get bad as electricity might go out for a variety of reasons. He makes sure plenty of flashlights and lanterns are around in case this happens because he’ll be damned if he lets Manon deal with the dark like that. He will have her in his arms with enough illumination to put her at ease.

Thunderstorms are also a major issue because it triggers so many flashbacks. Plus thunderstorms often knock electricity out so it’s even worse. His main focus is Manon though, and he knows that he needs to distract her from what’s going on. Noise canceling headphones help, and he makes sure to have them close in case there is a thunderstorm that he needs to distract Manon from.

He hated how these things are all because of Manon’s grandmother. She created each one of these fears and spent years growing them into a lifelong trauma because she started these things when Manon was a mere toddler and she kept escalating them the older Manon got. He just didn’t understand why someone would do this to their own offspring. He knows he can’t undo any of it but he can do his best to comfort her and make her feel safe.

[pergaminaa]

Post by @pergaminaa

💬 0  🔁 0  ❤️ 8 · Lmao okay this is just a little extension to what happened with sims!manorian (had a long talk with a friend about it and I

Random tidbits (1)

Dorian really went all out with this.

One aspect of being in the middle of nowhere is the limited amount of modern life.

There is a small town a couple of hours away and yes it’s mostly a treat because this is NOT a vacation. But also, he needs to go there to get some supplies and all. He normally takes Manon with him though because the commute alone can take up to five hours so he makes sure that they spend the day there getting everything they need.

Given the location, the place is really outdated and there isn’t much of modern technology that they can use. It’s as if the entire place is stuck in a previous era and honestly Dorian doesn’t mind it.

He particularly loves clothes shopping (for Manon) because he has so many ideas and honestly who’s going to stop him? Definitely not her. So he buys all those clothes that he loves to see her in, mostly dresses, some practical clothes for going out in the wild (Manon’s wardrobe is unfitting because this woman didn’t pack a single appropriate outfit she’s just asking to be bitten by insects and getting all kinds of scabs and bruises because she isn’t dressed properly).

One downside though is the outdated medical center in town. He tries to ensure that Manon doesn’t get sick or be in a situation where she needs to be seen by a medical doctor.

Back home, Manon’s new doctor (that Dorian had handpicked himself) is wonderful. She takes time to explain everything and tries her best to make Manon comfortable and she has ways to make things less unpleasant so it’s been great. Manon still hates all of it but she knows this one doctor won’t hurt her and even when she does there is no surprise there she is told about it so she is kind of prepared.

But up in the mountains? No such luck. Things are a little outdated and no one has the patience to explain things and take it slowly because there is literally only one or two doctors and they just want to get things over with as quickly as possible. Dorian knows how this is bad and undos everything which is why he tries to avoid going there when he can. But at times it’s necessary because when Manon gets sick she really gets very sick and she needs to be seen by a doctor to ease her symptoms and make her feel better.

Also some of those insects bites can be really bad and Dorian keeps an eye on them because if they get worse then he takes her there because he doesn’t want her to become sick if things worsen. He doesn’t like it either way because the entire thing is very triggering and Manon refuses to get treatment and the people they aren’t very friendly or patient and they don’t like how she’s reacting and she gets worse because of that so really, it’s something he’d rather avoid.

Which is why he’s particular about things because he wants to avoid these things. He makes sure Manon is dressed appropriately for the weather because this woman has no issues walking out in the deep snow wearing light clothes. Getting soaked wet in the rain? He doesn’t let her wander around like that because she can catch a cold from the cold mountain air. So he makes sure she takes a warm shower and that her hair is dry before they do anything else.

Manon is actually very complaint with that because she actually wants to avoid going to that medical center so she’s fine following Dorian’s instructions without much fuss. At times though, Dorian needs to use some otc medication because he tries to deal with any arising medical issue on his own if he can help it. He knows what kind of medication he can give Manon and he doesn’t need to argue why one type of medicine is better (sometimes pills are too big and Manon can’t take them no matter what so it’s better to just give her the liquid form but this can turn into a big argument because medical staff there are quick to prescribe pills and they don’t see why it’s an issue).

In the evenings, Dorian loves to wind down by brushing Manon’s hair and braiding it. He’s actually very good at it and it relaxes Manon like nothing else. By that point she’s ready for bed, and by the time Dorian is done she is feeling drowsy and it’s easy to slip under the covers because she’s barely keeping her eyes open. Dorian loves their routine and later on, after they reconciled and got back together, they snuggle together in bed and she falls asleep in Dorian’s arms.

[pergaminaa]

Modern au

Dorian would secretly confess that Manon does indeed like toast to be cut in particular ways and no he won’t elaborate any further on the matter he just knows what to do and that’s that.

[pergaminaa]

Post by @pergaminaa

💬 0  🔁 0  ❤️ 7 · Lmao okay this is just a little extension to what happened with sims!manorian (had a long talk with a friend about it and I

The drama

Dorian knows Manon well enough to know how she’d react to some things.

One thing he knows for certain (that many would be quick to deny, is that Manon Blackbeak is very dramatic) sure, she only reveals this to Dorian because he’s safe and she can totally be herself with him.

It was almost like a routine: she had a list of things to draw Dorian’s attention to to waste time especially when she didn’t want to do something.

One reason why Dorian set an early bed time is because he knows at least half an hour would be spent in those things and he wasn’t disappointed. To her credit, Manon stayed in bed during this time so she wasn’t breaking any rules. But she always had things to say: the room is too cold, too hot. the light is not bright enough and there are some dark corners that are creeping her out. did the curtain just move? is the window open? what if she hears knocking in the middle of the night?? and the list goes on and on.

During the day it’s no better: Dorian knows her and he knows she hates insects and bugs and the like. When they spend time outdoors he tells her it’s better to wear pants because they’re going to be surrounded by plants. Manon is Manon and she makes sure she’s wearing shorts just because. But of course, she spends the whole time freaking out because yes there are insects all around and the only reason you’re suffering is because you insisted on wearing those shorts and no there is no going back to the cabin to change you made your choice and you have to live with it. But despite that Dorian wasn’t cruel he did remove the insects and comforted his brat because she was dealing with the consequences of her actions. And later on, by dinner time Dorian listens to Manon explaining how she was nearly poisoned by those damned insects like she was probably one bite away from being dead. Dorian has different kinds of ointments so he makes sure to tend to any injury and insect bite while reminding Manon that wearing pants would protect her from these things.

And of course, the claim that Dorian drugs Manon at night so she can go to sleep (it helps her get deep restful sleep, it doesn’t make her drowsy at all but Manon ignores this for the sake of the drama) and she bring it up a few times.

And the food. Dorian limits caffeine because this woman needs to rest and relax and not be stressed and high strung. So no coffee first thing in the morning. There is waster, juice, whatever drink that doesn’t contain caffeine because that will come later on in the morning. But Manon doesn’t let it slide she refuses all options and there is always an excuse something tasted bad, another makes her stomach hurt and so on. Dorian entertained her for a while, and he just didn’t relent. Coffee comes later and that’s that so Manon will have to accept one of the offered options and there is no way around it. She does reason that if she drinks whatever Dorian has out she will be too full to drink anything else. Dorian would suggest skipping the coffee altogether if that’s the case and Manon would give him a look as if he’d gone crazy. He’s only teasing tho but her reaction is everything because yes she can actually be that dramatic at times.

[pergaminaa]

Post by @pergaminaa

💬 0  🔁 0  ❤️ 7 · Lmao okay this is just a little extension to what happened with sims!manorian (had a long talk with a friend about it and I

Progression

In hindsight, Dorian (later on) reasoned that he kind of acted insane (this was mostly Chaol backed up by Rowan) because what do you mean you virtually hauled your ex girlfriend to the mountains for months without giving her a chance to agree or disagree???

Dorian knew what he was walking to. He walked into the bar and he saw what he was expecting: Manon totally disregarding him and doing as she pleases and in that case it was self destruction because of all the alcohol and drugs.

Dorian admits that he was seeing red at that moment. He became aware of what he was doing and he stopped himself. He was too angry to continue rationally and he knew that if he didn’t stop he will end up hurting Manon for real and this is not what he wants.

He didn’t leave her there though. He took her home, stayed with her while she showered and almost forced her to go to sleep because it was near dawn anyway. It was only when he got home later, after making sure Manon was asleep and won’t attempt to go to that damned place again.

He formed his plan and in a few hours he was back at the Blackbeak estate packing clothes and all. He took Manon with him because he reasoned that going up to the mountains for a while is what she needs. Because she was left alone for a while and she just spiraled out of control. Manon can be her own worst enemy and Dorian was going to put an end to it.

She wasn’t his girlfriend anymore. But she was his sub and he her dom. This is the one dynamic that he will be enforcing strictly because this is what was missing. And he knows Manon long enough to know that she needs rules and structure to feel safe and secure.

Dorian didn’t waste any time. He spent most of the drive going over what will becomes of their upcoming days and what rules are in place. There were many of them, and he was prepared to hear many objections. He’s understanding, he’d listen to what Manon has to say, but ultimately, she will do as she is told or there will be consequences.

Manon did put in quite the show. But by the end of the week, Dorian had her meek and compliant because all of her attempts at rebellion were unsuccessful and she experienced the consequences first hand. Dorian is very creative and he knows exactly how to make her comply and submit. Manon needs to tire herself out first however because she never makes things easy (on herself)

But they had too much history. They still had feelings towards one another, and their love never waned. They’re used to passionate lovemaking after these things and not being able to do any of that was torture to both of them.

One evening, Dorian knew he shouldn’t be doing what he was doing. It was nearly bedtime, and he was chatting with Manon while she settled in bed. His hand wandered down from her back and she let him. She adjusted her position, giving him more access which he accepted.

“Tell me to stop,” He knew it was wrong. He shouldn’t be doing this but he was beyond self control at that point. But one word from her and he will stop.

“Don’t stop,” Because Dorian’s fingers wandering between her legs ignited a fire in Manon that she didn’t want to put out. She wanted to be consumed by Dorian and his touch was all that she needed.

They both knew they were treading into dangerous territory but neither one cared. They wanted each other in a way they couldn’t explain and they let it consume them.

It was soon after that when Dorian took Manon to his bed after a particularly bad nightmare. That was near impossible to go back from because they loved being together in the same bed. A few nights later, they made love and confessed that they want each other.

It didn’t change much, the rules still applied and everything is still the same aside from the fact that they can have sex when they have spent the day driving each other insane.

Manon would argue though that it’s all Dorian’s doing because her state of dress or undress is all because of Dorian so he’s literally just shooting himself in the foot. Dorian wasn’t amused because it’s just Manon playing with words to get her way which didn’t work because Dorian wasn’t amused, he was still calling the shots and as Manon found out, what Dorian says goes and there is nothing she can do about it.

[pergaminaa]

Modern au

Dorian buys all kinds of snacks and stuff but soon after getting them home he removes them from all packaging and put them in those glass containers because he doesn’t want Manon to read the labels and see the calories and all of that. So being the attentive caring boyfriend that he is, he makes sure his girl gets to eat without stressing herself because with him Manon is going to eat properly or at least eat better than what she used to do before him.

[pergaminaa]

Another bad dream feat. Manon Blackbeak let’s goooooo

I barely remember any details but it was mostly Yrene’s pov? Something something Dorian is feeling bitter about Manon ghosting him and they kinda just saw each other during some kind of event but Manon barely paid him any attention she kept appearing and disappearing because some elder members of the Blackbeak clan needed her (upstairs??? somewhere away from the party i think) because god forbid Manon can take a breather she’s always listening to orders and having no choice but obey them

So anyway Yrene heard this conversation between an old scary sounding woman (not the matron but someone just as awful) and a man (i think he was a physician??) and this was their conversation (most likely about Manon)

Man: she doesn’t like it

Woman: she doesn’t have to like it. see to it that it’s done quickly. we don’t have all night.

Yrene tried to listen to some more but they moved away and she didn’t want to be found out so she quickly left and rejoined the party.

She saw Dorian and asked him what does he know of Manon because she wanted to know if what she heard grounds for an intervention or not. But Dorian was mad and said that he doesn’t know and probably doesn’t care about her at this point because she’s happy entertaining everyone else and not even sparing him a glance.

But Yrene was like ‘could she be in trouble?’ But Dorian only shrugged because he honestly doesn’t know and Manon didn’t hint at anything she’ll probably show up again acting as if she doesn’t even know them.

By the time Yrene got those answers from Dorian enough time has passed and a pale faced Manon showed up again but she quietly joined her grandmother and just stayed by her side until event was over.

Yrene gets why Dorian is bitter but she knows something very wrong is going on because that entire conversation was still playing in her head and she wondered what the fuck is a physician even doing at this place.

[pergaminaa]

Post by @pergaminaa

💬 0  🔁 0  ❤️ 7 · Lmao okay this is just a little extension to what happened with sims!manorian (had a long talk with a friend about it and I

Food:

Since they are staying up in the mountains for a while, Dorian had a plan for everything. One thing he was focused on is keeping Manon busy and he really did plan their days meticulously.

He makes sure Manon actually eats because days are long and they have a lot of work to do. He doesn’t want her to faint because she’s tired and all. And no, refusing to eat is not optional and Manon learned that very quickly within their first week up in the cabin.

Dorian isn’t cruel. He doesn’t make her eat things she doesn’t like. He was mostly making her favorite food and he didn’t really introduce anything new. His focus is her and her wellbeing. But that doesn’t mean Manon is cooperative, on the contrary, she made sure to challenge him every step of the way. The end result is always the same though: she does what Dorian wants. But since it’s Manon she has to make things hard on herself for no reason at all.

Dorian was all out with what he was doing. The nearest town is a while away and he wasn’t planning on making that trip often (besides, he’s keeping trips to town as a reward so there is that as well). He has everything he needs around him and yes it requires some work and this is what they’re there for.

Manon isn’t helpful when it comes to the bulk of the work and he isn’t going to make her do impossible things. He does the cooking, but she helps him by setting the table and getting the things he needs when instructed. He doesn’t allow her to get idle and he can easily manage to find a job for her to do to keep her busy.

Since their days mainly consist of work, he makes sure there is plenty of food to go around. It was a bit of a challenge because Manon isn’t used to eating a lot and eating three times a day plus a snack is way too much food for her. But he doesn’t budge, she needs the energy and this is non negotiable. He reasoned that she can eat smaller portions (that he decides on) but she will eat the food he makes and there is no way around that.

[pergaminaa]

Modern au

Idk I feel that Manon Blackbeak wouldn’t suspect that she’s pregnant when she misses a few periods her reaction would be good riddance i can finally have some peace and quiet and she’s just not linking the two together

[pergaminaa]

lmao i never spoke about this before on here buuuut I’ve been busy these past couple of weeks with the physiotherapy for a stupid problem i should not be having but i guess my anxiety and overthinking are fucking up my actual body???

anyway after 4 sessions my physiotherapist says there is big improvement but i don’t feel it because this is still a struggle. i also ordered those tools to use at home in an attempt to train my muscles and ugh i dont really like it but there isn’t much i can do about it sadly

[pergaminaa]

Post by @pergaminaa

💬 0  🔁 0  ❤️ 6 · Lmao okay this is just a little extension to what happened with sims!manorian (had a long talk with a friend about it and I

Sleep:

Unfortunately for both, since this all happened while Manon and Dorian were broken up, they each stayed in a different room.

Dorian might have been more strict than usual, because this was a sort of a rehab thing. But he wasn’t cruel. Yes, he stuck to the appointed bed time and never budged no matter how many times Manon tried. It just never worked and she was only making things harder on herself because this woman didn’t know when to quit. She did give up after a few days because Dorian wasn’t changing his mind and she was cutting her loses because it always ended her in an unfavorable position she called it quits in about a week.

Anyway, back to the main point: Dorian knows about her issues with sleep and night time and while he wasn’t playing around, he also didn’t want Manon to be uncomfortable.

Dorian also found an old baby monitor without a screen just something he can use to hear Manon is she needs him. She refused it, called it ridiculous and an over reaction. She also threatened to chuck it out of the window. Dorian said that he’d love to see her try and do that, because there will be consequences to that that she wouldn’t particularly like at all. Dorian told her that it will stay on all night, if she is having a nightmare he will be able to hear her and rush to her side. Just because they’re in different rooms doesn’t mean he can’t come to her aid.

They’re in the middle of the mountains so outside of the window is pitch dark because there aren’t any lights. He is aware of Manon’s nightmares and he knows that things can escalate quickly. She wakes up all alone, in the dark, outside is dark, he can keep the hallway light on just in case but he also needs to make sure she’s safe in her room.

He did tell her that she won’t be able to see anything outside. Also that it’s better to just not peek behind the curtains. A small lamp on the bedside table is kept on during the whole night. If she wakes up, Dorian doesn’t want her to be scared.

Also, since they’re surrounded by nature there will be all kinds of sounds coming from the nearby area. So yes, Dorian is aware how this entire thing can go bad really quickly. It’s dark, loud noises are coming from outside, and Manon would wake up alone in the middle of all of this. So he’s not budging in this, if she so much as breathes differently he wants to be aware of it and he. Will. Be. By. Her. Side.

Manon argued that what if the device started emitting strange sounds in the middle of the night? Then what? But it was just Manon thinking of all of those possibilities and scaring herself for no reason. It wasn’t necessary because Dorian stayed with her until she was fast asleep. He never left the room while she was awake so she’s in good hands.

Things changed when one night after a bad nightmare Dorian sat them on the swing in the deck. He knows that rocking helps greatly so he was outside with Manon just slowly rocking them until she was calm. He stayed there until she fell asleep in his arms and even so, he remained outside just so that he can have her in her embrace for longer.

Finally going back inside, he hesitated at her door. He knows he should out her back to bed but he didn’t want to. He didn’t want to leave her alone again. After a night like this, the best place for Manon is his embrace and he hated the idea that he will leave her alone again. So deciding that he knows what’s best for her, dorian said fuck it and took Manon to his room and he laid her down next to him on his bed.

This kinda started a new thing, Manon spent more times sleeping in his bed than she did hers. Both of them liked this new arrangement and soon it became more than her just sleeping next to him. They won’t even lie and say that the sex was accidental because it wasn’t.

And honestly with them it didn’t make things more complicated on the contrary things started making more sense. Because now Manon can’t argue that dorian can’t do this or that to her because ‘who are you to me?’ Because now Dorian can easily answer with ‘I’m your boyfriend’ and this shuts her up immediately (with an eye roll because she just can’t let things go peacefully).

So all in all, spending MONTHS up in that cabin did reap some interesting results and both of them are more appreciative of everything that happened (not Manon though because she still thinks Dorian was unfair to her most of the time) but Dorian always argues that she’s being dramatic and he moved on so quickly while Manon is still stewing and fuming,

[pergaminaa]

Post by @pergaminaa

💬 0  🔁 0  ❤️ 7 · Lmao okay this is just a little extension to what happened with sims!manorian (had a long talk with a friend about it and I

Work:

Staying up in the mountains with no nearby towns meant that there is A LOT of work to do around the place. Plus, since they’re staying there for months winter was on the way and they really needed to prepare for that.

Dorian would spend a few hours in the morning cutting up wood. He uses an axe to get the job done and normally he ends up with a decent stack to be taken inside for storage.

He’s not the only one working. Yes, he might be the shirtless man cutting up woods with a big heavy axe just showing off his muscles for no reason. This is where Manon comes in, because this is no vacation and she will be put to work to keep her busy. Dorian isn’t crazy and he won’t let her touch the heavy axe because she will probably end up dropping it and hurting herself. So her job is to take the logs inside.

Dorian had clear instructions: only five logs at a time. She takes them inside and then come back outside to pick another five and so on until all the wooden logs are done. They can be quite heavy and the trip back and forth seven or eight times is going to tire her out. He can normally tell by the complaining: if she’s complaining then she’s fine. But towards the end she gets quiet and he knows she’s actually tired.

They take a short break to rest and hydrate, then it’s more work. Even while cooking, Dorian does the bulk of the work but Manon has her job as well. She helps him around, she gets him what he needs and hands it to him. So yes, she has her uses. Dorian also tasks her with setting the table. Even when they’re done, Dorian lets her clear the table and while he does the dishes she dries them and puts them back in their place in the cupboards.

So their days are filled with work throughout their entire stay. They spend a lot of time outdoors because Dorian believes that being outside in the fresh air and sunlight is actually good for Manon. There is a lake which he likes to go to, he wished he could help Manon learn how to swim but she refused and kept a safe distance. He didn’t pressure her, and he made her a promise that he will never make her do something she doesn’t want especially when it comes to water and swimming. Manon believes him, and she didn’t have an hesitation because she knows Dorian is never going to push her to do something she doesn’t feel comfortable doing.

They also walk outside a lot. Dorian believes that all the work and exercise are good for Manon. He can see it on her face, she’s gaining color because under his strict supervision she’s actually eating and spending a lot of time outdoors. He can see how she’s benefiting from all of this and he knows he’s done the right thing.

But this was also a bad idea because the entire situation was driving them both to insanity. The fact that they couldn’t touch each other despite wanting nothing more than that really tested their patience.

Manon watching Dorian cut the wood while shirtless and his muscles flexing? Yeah that wasn’t a good thing because they didn’t have that kind of relationship anymore. And it’s the same for Dorian, Manon needs to cool off so she’s wearing shorts and all kinds of sexy shirts that really showed her legs and figure and it only spurred Dorian to chop woods harder because he needed to keep his attention on something that is not the woman next to him.

So all the work was a good distraction for both of them because yes, if they stay idle there is no telling what they might do. Not that it made a difference, eventually they did cave in and just let their bodies and feelings take over them because they were done pretending. Spending that time together talking and doing all kinds of activities just brought them closer together. So yes in a way this was to help Manon but it also brought them back together.

[pergaminaa]

Idk i woke up and within minutes i grabbed my phone and went to check the weather app and tell me why i started looking up calgary 😭😭😭 is this where my brain pictures Manon to be from???

[wiress-q]

LMAO? isn't throne of glass based in scottland and theyre all scottish or something 😭

[pergaminaa]

EXACTLY!! i know that it’s there and a lot of it makes sense because i personally looked up some things to pinpoint an approximate location but my brain decided on calgary of all places???

i do headcanon her from Canada tho but i never pinpointed to a specific location that’s why i was very surprised lmao

[wiress-q]

yeah ive seen some of them on pinterest and other social medias

[pergaminaa]

yeah!! but honestly when it comes to ethnicity this is what i see in Manon: she’s half welsh on her father’s side and on her mother’s side Lothian is half Scottish (most prominent) and half Russian (through the matrons lineage) so eventually it all checks out we got all the important places lmao

[pergaminaa]

Idk i woke up and within minutes i grabbed my phone and went to check the weather app and tell me why i started looking up calgary 😭😭😭 is this where my brain pictures Manon to be from???

[wiress-q]

LMAO? isn't throne of glass based in scottland and theyre all scottish or something 😭

[pergaminaa]

EXACTLY!! i know that it’s there and a lot of it makes sense because i personally looked up some things to pinpoint an approximate location but my brain decided on calgary of all places???

i do headcanon her from Canada tho but i never pinpointed to a specific location that’s why i was very surprised lmao

[pergaminaa]

Idk i woke up and within minutes i grabbed my phone and went to check the weather app and tell me why i started looking up calgary 😭😭😭 is this where my brain pictures Manon to be from???

[pergaminaa]

Modern au

Having three children means that Manon went through labor three times and honestly she’d rate the entire experience -1000/10 because she did not have a good time at all.

And it didn’t get better because it happened multiple times. By the time she had her second daughter it’s been too long and she forgot everything she was literally re-experiencing the whole thing with a blank slate and yes it was just as awful and bad like the first one. There was no use telling her that she did it before because that wasn’t a viable option.

With her third daughter it was the opposite because it happened TOO SOON and she still remembers everything and she was reacting just as badly if not worse.