Food has important political and symbolic meanings in this workplace
For instance, if you want to know if a woman likes you, offer her an apple
If she eats it all and keeps herself from burping, it means she really likes you
Because apples let off a lot of gas as they digest
And if she keeps the burps down, to look good in front of you
Then all that gas is going to have to be forced downward
And end up being locked inside her bloated tummy, without any way to escape
All the pressure rumbling around inside her, stretching her tummy bigger and tighter and rounder
If she’s willing to go through that for your sake
Then she really, really likes you
And probably daydreams about what it would feel like
For your hands to be pressed against the round orb of her belly
Against the tightly stretched skin so sensitive
That it’s become her most sensual erogenous zone