Second star to the right

Just me anyway…

mariatolken

Peter! Oh Pete, thank god! I haven’t seen you since, oh … come here, why haven’t you stop by… I was so worried

*frowns at her, not wanting to be touched, scars beginning to show on his back from the whipping*

mariatolken

Oh...

I’m sorry I didn’t see you there, how are you, I mean considering…

Just me anyway...

isaidnopeeking

"I want to prove to people that I’m an actor and not just a character… I think I’m starting on my way to doing that."

I'll be your sky: Mere and Peter: A dream

"And she did it…She could have killed us both and I wish she had. I don’t want to live this. I’m nothing anymore. And I’m just…I’m not her. She was brave and she took the fall and I could have stayed there with her. They pushed me out and I wanted to be with her but I couldn’t. None of it’s fair. None of it. Oh fuck you, Mere. Don’t tell me you’ve come into my dreams to fucking lecture me."

"You can’t change what she did or didn’t do, just like you can’t change what Tanya chose. I’m sorry, Pete, but now you just have to figure out what to do with the life you’ve got. Wishing you’re dead won’t do anyone any good, particularly not Tanya’s memory. Or mine." Mere sighed and shook her head. "And here I was, thinking that absence made the heart grow fonder. Pete, I’m just trying to help. I swear. But if you don’t want me around…" she turned and began to walk away.

Peter looked down, unsure of what to do anymore. He was overcome with grief and so confused that he didn't even know how to process the vision before him. He knew it couldn't possibly be real but she felt so...herself to him there. He didn't know what to do and he saw her turning to leave. "No! You...please. Stay."Peter reached out to gently grab her hand, eyes pleading to her.

And that’s exactly what you’ve been doing this whole time. Turning a blind eye. And it’s gotten us all into this mess. There are people who are DEAD because we’ve done nothing.

Thanks for your input Peter, like I said, when you are ready to star acting your age, you know where to find us.

Shut up, Rob. I already told you that I'm going to help whether you like it or not.

I'll be your sky: Mere and Peter: A dream

Peter shook his head. He was dreaming and he was even getting lectured in his sleep. This was ridiculous. “I don’t WANT their help. I deserve this. Don’t you understand? I let her die. She just died in front of me because I couldn’t stop them. Forget it. I’m not here to have you tell me what to do.”

Mere shook her head. ” ‘Let her?’ You let her die?” Her palm smacked against her forehead as she continued, “Pete, you couldn’t have done anything. The point wasn’t to kill the people she hated. The point was to cause as much pain as possible. Think of it. How many people cared about Harrison, and Tanya, and me? So many, Pete.” She paused for a second, before adding, “She chose that, Pete. She chose your life. So are you gonna do something with it, or are you gonna sit around in a puddle of self pity, wasting it all?”

"And she did it...She could have killed us both and I wish she had. I don't want to live this. I'm nothing anymore. And I'm just...I'm not her. She was brave and she took the fall and I could have stayed there with her. They pushed me out and I wanted to be with her but I couldn't. None of it's fair. None of it. Oh fuck you, Mere. Don't tell me you've come into my dreams to fucking lecture me."

She's going to come back

"I don’t feel like it…I just wanna go home." He sighed and looked at the ground. He’d hoped now that Melena had at least tried to help him that she’d be done with him. Apparently he was wrong. " I don’t want to waste anymore of your time."

melena-faye

Sighing, Melena looked over at the boy, she could see how broken he was, inside as well as out. But there was only so much she could do for him, and as much as she hated to do it, she would have to let him leave. At least for now. She would continue to check up on the boy, to make sure he didn’t cause any harm to himself or others. “Alright Pete, why don’t you go home for now. Lets meet sometime tomorrow so I can check your wounds and see how they are doing. Sound fair?”

#she should totally make him stay with her. he shouldn't be alone even though he keeps yelling that he should be

Peter followed her gaze and gulped dryly. He could feel anger and pain still raging inside him. Of course his back now felt a little bit better and he felt a bit more comfortable around her there but he didn't want her care. He didn't want to be a burden. He already felt as if he was taking so much from everyone else around him, that he should have been the one to die instead of Tanya. After all, she had a true love, someone to call her own and she had mattered. Who was he? He was a nothing that had messed up so big that everyone was paying for it...except for himself. "Yeah...sure...whatever." He began to leave, heading straight for the door without looking back.

How can you be so sure that we can win when everything is already lost?

I’m not… I’ve never been sure, there were times when I just wished I could drop everything and do like every other citizen does, turn a blind eye, but then I thought even if we don’t win… at least we did something, we fought back…

And that's exactly what you've been doing this whole time. Turning a blind eye. And it's gotten us all into this mess. There are people who are DEAD because we've done nothing.

I'll be your sky: Mere and Peter: A dream

Peter frowned still, folding his arms. “It feels like you’re mocking me. That’s what it feels like. What do you want, Mere? Why are you here? What am I doing? I’m asking you the questions here! Are you kidding me? You just…go off and die like that and I’m supposed to be ok with that?”

" ‘Just go off and die like that’?" Mere’s voice took on a harsh edge. "Yes, I had a spear shoved into my gut on purpose, just for kicks, you know?" she said, sarcasm dripping from each word. "That’s not the point, though, Pete. The point is you’ve got to stop hurting everyone just because you’re hurting. They’re already hurt. Some of them even want to help you. So let them."

Peter shook his head. He was dreaming and he was even getting lectured in his sleep. This was ridiculous. "I don't WANT their help. I deserve this. Don't you understand? I let her die. She just died in front of me because I couldn't stop them. Forget it. I'm not here to have you tell me what to do."

Good because I’m ready. For her. For both of them.

For the living too, we are honoring the loved ones we lost, but remember that we are fighting to give those who remain a better life.

How can you be so sure that we can win when everything is already lost?

I'll be your sky: Mere and Peter: A dream

Peter looked up at her, certain that he was dreaming. Or delusional…or quite possibly both. What the hell was happening here? He gulped and studied his shoe.”Where the hell have YOU been? ” He said angrily, not quite expecting himself to burst out as he has. “We’ve been MOURNINg you and you’re making jokes?”

Mere gave Pete a sad little smile. “Pete, you’re in mourning because I am, in fact, dead. And when don’t I make jokes?” She laughed a little, and then her expression turned more grave. “The better question is, what the hell are you doing, Pete?”

Peter frowned still, folding his arms. "It feels like you're mocking me. That's what it feels like. What do you want, Mere/ Why are you here? What am I doing? I'm asking you the questions here! are you kidding me? You just...go off and die like that and I'm supposed to be ok with that?"

She's going to come back

Peter winced at the contact but watched her just the same. He waited for her to finish and did feel some relief that he hadn’t felt that entire weekend. Something was at least happening as far as that. But he wanted to live in misery and figured he didn’t deserve happiness after Tanya had died for him. “I’m fine…”He lied, knowing full well there were other marks on his body that he didn’t want to worry about for the moment.

melena-faye

Melena could tell that Peter was lying, but she could see that the rest of his injuries were not as serious. “Alright, well now that you are all patched up how about we get some food or water into you. That will help you heal faster.” Maybe when he was feeling a bit better she could look at his other injuries.

"I don't feel like it...I just wanna go home." He sighed and looked at the ground. He'd hoped now that Melena had at least tried to help him that she'd be done with him. Apparently he was wrong. " I don't want to waste anymore of your time."

I'll be your sky: Mere and Peter: A dream

Peter had been restless in his dreams, hardly getting any sleep whatsoever ever since he was released by the Queen herself. He’d seen Tanya in his dreams non stop and sometimes he wanted to stay in the dreams themselves. And yet some days he was afraid to wake up and in others he was afraid to sleep just the same for fear of the nightmares of torture. He was deep in his sleep now, sleeping gingerly on his side as his back was still healing. Peter rolled over restlessly, landing on a wound that reopened despite his groans.

In the dream, he saw something wonderful…something he couldn’t believe was real. he was in a field, a large, wonderful field that seemed to stretch on for miles. In the field was a bear that stared at him high above his gaze. In any other place, he would be afraid of the bear but something told him not to be just that. He looked up at the bear and smiled before walking closer towards it. the bear began to change and he closed his eyes to the light that came from it. When he opened them again, he saw someone very, very familiar standing before him.

Mere smiled serenely as her friend approached her. “There’s my favorite idiot. Well, one of them anyways.”

Peter looked up at her, certain that he was dreaming. Or delusional...or quite possibly both. What the hell was happening here? He gulped and studied his shoe."Where the hell have YOU been? " He said angrily, not quite expecting himself to burst out as he has. "We've been MOURNINg you and you're making jokes?"

She's going to come back

"I don’t care if it hurts…"Peter said in annoyance but let her make a move for it anyway. He knew that she could see the marks, knew that they would become scars some day. He couldn’t take it back now, couldn’t save Tanya no matter how many times he played it over and over again in his head. "They tortured me."

melena-faye

Melena took one of the cloths and soaked it in the water. Once it was fully soaked, she pulled it out of the water and began to gently wash the dried blood and filth off of Peter’s back. Once the area was clear, she began to apply the ointment to the beaten area. Covered with soothing ointment, Melena then dressed the wound to keep it from becoming infected. “I can see that, it looks like they had quite a good time whipping you. Fortunately the damage isn’t too bad, now that it is clean and dressed it should be able to heal nicely. Is there anywhere else that is hurting Pete?”

Peter winced at the contact but watched her just the same. He waited for her to finish and did feel some relief that he hadn't felt that entire weekend. Something was at least happening as far as that. But he wanted to live in misery and figured he didn't deserve happiness after Tanya had died for him. "I'm fine..."He lied, knowing full well there were other marks on his body that he didn't want to worry about for the moment.

Fine…you really think I want to fuck this up too? Is that what you believe? This is the most important thing I’ve ever done.

I didn’t say anything… just … just stop thinking that the world hates you Peter, it’s not true. This is the most important thing we’ll ever do…