✧ mutant ✧

pet•ri•chor ❝ if i am the grass, then life is the rain. and left here i am, still after the storm. ❞ indie + selective marvel oc please read file and guidelines upon interaction written by kelsey

[petrichoriisms]

me: quietly sends everyone v v good vibes bc im not in a good enough mindspace to be on illana but i want to let everyone know i love them and wish them well atm

[toskavechnyy]

just a small psa!!  these next couple of months are going to be insane, so replies may or may be coming out slower than usual!  i’ll be working 9-5 6 days a week and then also working some nights at a different job, so my only chill days will be sunday (which will probably be used for sleeping tbh)  so i’ll be slowly working on stuff throughout the week, but please don’t think i’m ignoring you if replies don’t happen quickly <3 <3  i should be free mid-may so things should pick up then!! if y’all want to talk ooc, just hit me up for my skype or discord (i use the former more than the latter but i have notifications for both)

[petrichoriisms]

notintime:

“I want you to stay forever, Delia. And I do want  you around all the time. You make my life even more  interesting than it already is. And that’s definitely saying a lot.”

 Barry took a step closer to herand took her hand with ease. He held her hand and closed the distance between them completely. He wrapped his other arm around her into a hug, holding her close to him. Whether she hugged him back in that moment didn’t matter to him. Barry missed her. A lot. It really wasn’t the same without her at all. Over the time she stayed with him, something serious formed between them, and he still wanted it. He dropped the hug but kept their hands laced together as he pressed his forehead against hers.

“I still love you, Delia. That didn’t change when you were gone.  I don’t think it could ever change, except by continuing to grow.”

Their relationship was complicated but the fact that they did love each other remained true. He’d admitted it first and it did take her a while, but that was okay. He understood. Barry would always understand. Minutes passed and Barry did let go of her hand, only so he could wrap his arm around her waist and bring her completely into the apartment once again. Her bags stayed by the door (they could get them later). Barry released his arm from her to stand in front of her once again. 

“This is your home, Delia. And it can be your home for as long as you want.”

❝ forever’s an awfully long time...  but i can promise right now, and tomorrow, and the day after that.  i...  don’t want to go anywhere. ❞ 

an admission she’d never thought she’d say.  but there it was, words slipping through her lips before she could stop them, attention moving towards the touch of his hand, her fingers lacing with his.  and before she could say anything more, she was pulled into a hug, delia not exactly hugging back, but quickly giving in, allowing herself to relax, bask in the warmth of his touch.  she couldn’t help but miss him, and miss these embraces, even though she’d never fully gotten used to them before ---  it was one of the things she had no fighting chance against loving.  in fact, even the smallest amount of distance left her wanting it gone once more.

❝ you didn’t stop? ❞ 

part of her thought that maybe with distance, he’d realize he deserved more than someone like her ---  of course, another part hoped that he’d continue to care for her, just as she did for him.  maybe distance made the heart grow fonder, but she realized that on her end, there was no use in trying to run from those emotions.  bags ignored, her focus entirely on barry, a soft breath fell from her lips.  god, he was way too soft, way too kind, but she couldn’t help but find it all endearing.  because, yes, she really did love him, and would continue to do so.

❝ no, it’s ---  this apartment’s not my home.  if i had to call anything home, and i know this is cheesy and cliche and all around...  y’know.  i’d have to say you’re my home. ❞ 

[petrichoriisms]

❝ i think i’m just tired. ❞ 

honestly, that was probably the reason behind whatever breakdown she was fighting against.  barry knew how she got when she was just plain hungry, and with fatigue, she felt more of a train wreck than usual. a sigh of a breath slipped through her lips, delia leaning back against him, allowing herself just a few more minutes of silence.  as much as she hated the quiet, there were moments like these when words needed to wait.

❝ i’m always tired, and no amount of sleep seems to help  ---  and i’m frustrated because of that.  and i think i started crying because my favorite sweater was in the wash and everything wants to make me cry ;;  isn’t that just annoying? ❞ 

@notintime  ||  from here 

[petrichoriisms]

❝ i’m just thinking...  it’s pretty boring waiting around here the majority of the time, and if something goes terribly wrong, you can just blame me. ❞ 

of course, the latter part of her words being more of a joke than anything else (although, really, if something did go wrong, it probably would be her fault), delia shooting barry a teasing smile.  in all reality, it just didn’t feel right having her stick around home when she had a good enough grip on her emotions, and was doing more than ‘good’ with her abilities.  maybe it wasn’t the job she particularly wanted to do, but now that she was what she was, she wasn’t going to fight it forever.  and why not try it out now, with barry by her side?

❝ the only thing i could see there being a problem with is my name ---  and suit.  can’t really be ‘delia the bum’ fighting crime and all. ❞ 

@notintime  || from here 

[petrichoriisms]

Angst Starter Masterlist

" Aren't you going to say something?"

" And I thought I loved you."

" And I thought you loved me."

" Angry. I'm.. I'm angry."

" Aren't you even going to cry?"

" Are you going to cry?"

" Are you crying?"

" Are you okay?"

" Ask if I'm okay. Just ask."

" And this is why I don't want to stay anymore."

" Addiction isn't the way to go, ___ "

" Are you angry with me?"

" Are you afraid?"

" And now is the part where we say goodbye."

" And now you're going to leave me!"

" Are you just going to leave me?"

" Be friends with someone else."

" Boy/Girlfriend? Is that what you thought I meant?"

" Because you're such an ass and I- I just hate you!"

" But I've changed."

" But you've changed."

" Buy yourself something nice. Because I don't want this ring."

" But.. you're still alive?"

" Can't you just let me be happy for one?!"

" Can't you be happy for once?

" Can't you just be happy for me?"

" Come on, leave already!"

" Coward. That's all you are. A coward."

" Do you even know what you've done to me?"

" Do you have any remorse? "

" Don't you dare close your eyes on me!"

" Don't you dare die."

" Don't you care about me/her/him/them anymore?"

" Don't give me that look"

" Don't you want me to be happy?"

" Dammit! Everything was just starting to get better and then you do this!"

" Damn you."

" Don't lie to me."

" Don't like to him/her/them."

" Dammit.. Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck! You fucking ass!"

" Everything is fucked up now- everything is fucked because of you!"

" Everything's gone to hell."

" Everyone hates me."

" Everyone hates you."

" Everything hurts."

" Everything's going to be okay."

" Everyone loves you, not me."

" Everything is falling apart."

" Everything fell apart and I can't pick up the pieces anymore."

" For someone whose dying, you seem kind of happy."

" Friends forever, right? Isn't that what you said?"

" Fuck off!"

" Fuck you!"

" Find a new place to live."

" Find a new girlfriend/boyfriend."

" Find a new best-friend."

" Fine. I'll leave."

" Forever and ever. That's how long I said I loved you. But you never said it back."

" Fucking hell, I hate you!"

" Get lost!"

" Get a job, you ass!"

" Get out of here!"

" Go get a life."

" Go. Just go."

" How are you still alive?"

" How long are you going to keep this up?"

" How long until you finally get lost?"

" How about I just leave."

" Hold up. You're breaking up with me?"

" Heaven doesn't exist."

" Hell is the only place we're going to be going."

" How about you leave now?"

" Is this how you're going to treat me?"

" I can't believe you."

" I'm a monster."

" I killed someone."

" I want to kill myself."

" I want to kill something."

" I'm running away."

" I'm leaving you."

" I can't look at you right now."

" I hope you die!"

" I don't understand."

" I'm so angry/sad. But you don't care."

" I can't hear anything."

" I'm dying."

" I have cancer."

" I can feel the darkness coming."

" I can't breathe."

" Just joking, I don't love you."

" Just go."

" Just leave me alone!"

" Just fuck off."

" Kill yourself. "

" Kindly get the hell away from me."

" Kids? I don't want kids."

" Kind. That's the one thing you can never manage to be."

" Lie. Just lie."

" Lie to me."

" Life is not worth living."

" Living isn't possible."

" Like I give a shit about you."

" Lies are all you're capable of."

" Lay down. It'll all be over soon."

" My heart is broken. "

" My.. everything hurts."

" My girlfriend/boyfriend left."

" My ____ is dead."

" Man, you're an asshole."

" My lies aren't working anymore."

" Mutt."

" Many times I lay awake and wonder why I'm alive anymore."

" Never again."

" Never speak to me again."

" No. I won't do it."

" No, I don't like you like that."

" No way in hell!"

" Now, now, is there really any reason to cry?"

" Now and again I really start to hate you."

" No. Stop crying, just stop it."

" Not how I wanted to spend my life."

" Never look at me again."

" People hate me."

" People hate you."

" Person? No, no. You're not a person. You're a robot."

" People like you sicken me."

" People like you deserve to die."

" Perhaps you should just leave, then."

" Piss off."

" Question: why are you still here?"

" Quiet. I'm getting sick of hearing your voice."

" Run away. That's what I'm doing."

" See? I hate you."

" See? You hate me."

" Sometimes I wonder why you stay with me."

" So.. you hate me, then?"

" So this is how it ends."

" Shoot me."

" Shit..."

" So why are you still here?"

" Sometimes people lie to me."

" Stories are just that. Stories."

" Took off with everything I had!"

" Time to go."

" This is the end. It's done."

" The story is ending now."

" This is the end."

" This is why I hate you."

" Then why do you say you love me?!"

" Unlike you I have friends."

" Unlike me, you have friends"

" Under the bed is were I have to hide from you."

" Underwater is where i want me coffin to be."

" Utter it again and I swear I'll kill you!"

" Very mature. Cunt."

" Why can't you row up?"

" Why cant you care about me?"

" Why do you hate me?"

" Why do I hate you?"

" What do you mean?"

" What?You're dying?"

" Why can't you just be you."

" When am I supposed to get my time to be happy?'

" Well. This isn't how it was supposed to end between us."

" Whatever, you asshole."

" Whenever you decide you can stand to talk to me ago, please do."

" Well. I hate you now."

" Well, you hate me now."

[no--models-deactivated20190417]

[spctlessminds]

this ask meme is based on the blog gravesuggestion.  i’ve divided it up into two categories  ( light  &  dark )  based on the themes.  some of these can be somewhat triggering seeing that the darker ones deal with a lot of death mentions.  please be cautious before continuing on!!

L I G H T

‘  at night i dream of you.  ’ ‘  don’t give up yet.  you still have time to fix things.  ’ ‘  falling in love with someone else is not a personal attack.  ’ ‘  i am still so weak when it comes to you.  ’ ‘  i can’t believe i let myself let you down.  ’ ‘  i don’t care where we go when we die,  as long as i’m with you.  ’ ‘  i dream of saying to you all the words i held inside until it was too late.  ’ ‘  i feel so warm  &  safe when you talk to me.  maybe i could love you if you’d let me.  ’ ‘  i finally let the right people in  &  i have never felt so loved.  ’ ‘  i like the way your nails paint red stripes along my spine days after you’re gone.  ’ ‘  i lived in your permafrost for twenty years  &  then you looked at me  &  i felt the warmth of spring.  ’ ‘  i once wished you’d leave me alone,  but i take it back.  ’ ‘  i want to be able to love someone else,  but you stretch your arms  &  spread your legs inside my heart so that there is no room for anyone or anything else.  ’ ‘  i want to believe that we got it right this time.  ’ ‘  i wonder how much longer i can cling to your light before it expires completely.  ’ ‘  i would travel across the world to be by your side,  because as long as you are with me,  anywhere is a perfect place to me.  ’ ‘  it took me awhile to realize it myself,  but you are not what other people say you are.  ’ ‘  it’s not that i really need you,  but life would be pretty boring without you around.  there’s no one i would rather be with.  ’ ‘  i’d like to stay like this for awhile.  ’ ‘  life  &  death don’t have to be so boring,  let’s make both an adventure.  ’ ‘  life imitates art,  they say.  i didn’t believe it until i started to notice the way your eyelashes look so much like tiny ink stroke.  ’ ‘  live your life so that when you die,  souls will come for miles just to hear your historic tales.  ’ ‘  make your exes jealous  &  your past self proud.  ’ ‘  maybe you’re what i needed to find in order to move on.  ’ ‘  never get caught falling harder.  they’ll never let you back up.  ’ ‘  please don’t go.  ’ ‘  some days it’s easier to just stop fighting it  &  succumb.  ’ ‘  sometimes,  you’ll find it hard to keep going,  but you always will.  ’ ‘  the desire i feel for you is that same itching,  insidious hunger that an addict has for their addiction.  ’ ‘  the worst thing about you is that you weren’t all bad.  ’ ‘  there is absolutely nothing  &  no one who can stop me.  ’ ‘  there is no route of losing you that is without pain.  ’ ‘  there’s still room for adventure  &  there is no one i’d rather have by my side.  ’ ‘  things didn’t turn out the way i planned,  but i’m alright with that.  ’ ‘  we could be really incredible together,  you know?  ’ ‘  you are beautiful  &  vibrant  &  confident.  you are light  &  laughter incarnate  &  every fiber of your being screams freedom  &  joy.  when i am with you,  i am truly happy.  ’ ‘  you are starlight incarnate,  from the grand way you sway your hips to the wide mysterious way you think.  blessed are any to be loved by you.  ’ ‘  you are too afraid of the future to let go of a past that was never kind to you.  ’ ‘  you call me yours  &  i have no idea what that even means to you.  ’ ‘  you remind me of bubblegum  &  sweets;  soft  &  pink  &  warm.  you are strong in the gentlest way.  you are so stubbornly kind.  i wish i could be like that.  ’ ‘  you still visit me while i sleep sometimes.  your fingers trace my spine  &  i listen to you breathe.  please stop haunting me.  ’ ‘  ‘morbid curiosity’ is a wonderful way to describe how i feel about you.  ’

D A R K

‘  a thousand empty bottles  &  fist fights will never return to us what we lost that day.  ’ ‘  everyone else has moved on,  but i am still here.  ’ ‘  everything about you screams danger.  ’ ‘  everything is worthless to you  &  you,  in turn,  became worthless.  ’ ‘  for once in my life i want to be surrounded by people that i don’t feel like i need to impress.  ’ ‘  freedom is really hard to get used to.  ’ ‘  how could you do this to me?  how fucking could you?  ’ ‘  i am becoming everything we always dreamed of  &  i am leaving you behind.  ’ ‘  i buried you so well that you might as well have died.  ’ ‘  i can rest easy knowing that the person i love is dead  &  not the monster you became.  ’ ‘  i can’t look at you.  not now,  not ever.  ’ ‘  i don’t ask how you’ve been.  what’s the point?  you’d lie anyways.  ’ ‘  i dream of hearing the words i so desperately needed to lay your memory to rest.  ’ ‘  i haunted this house first.  there is no room for you here.  ’ ‘  i have a right to be upset.  i loved them too, you know.  ’ ‘  i just want it to end.  i want it to all go away.  i want to go away.  ’ ‘  i may be a wolf in sheep’s clothing,  but a snake hiding in the skin of a mouse is far more dangerous.  ’ ‘  i saw your face today  &  didn’t feel anything.  i am free.  ’ ‘  i tried to save you,  but you didn’t want to be saved.  you just wanted someone to suffer with you.  ’ ‘  it’s almost as if you were never here.  ’ ‘  it’s unhealthy to do these things,  you tell me.  you say it’s time to stop smoking,  time to stop gambling,  &  dammit,  i f you don’t stop drinking it’ll kill you.  i sure hope you’re right,  darling.  ’ ‘  i’m always pleasantly surprised by how easy it is to kill you in my mind  ’ ‘  i’m not really scared to die.  i’m more afraid that no one will miss me when i’m gone.  ’ ‘  i’m not the person you left behind anymore.  there’s no one here to miss.  ’ ‘  i’ve been dead far longer than i’ve been alive.  ’ ‘  i’ve eaten nothing but flower petals  &  ivy for weeks because i want to be beautiful inside like you.  ’ ‘  i’ve never been completely satisfied.  i most likely will still be unsatisfied long after my death.  ’ ‘  no motive other than pleasure,  my dear.  ’ ‘  one day i’ll go or you will.  either way,  it will be as if i’m losing a piece of myself.  ’ ‘  our dreams  &  promises decay along with you.  ’ ‘  the leaves change,  but nothing else does.  ’ ‘  the only difference between avoiding  &  leaving is that now i’m not waiting up for you.  ’ ‘  there is no such thing as a person who is required to love you.  ’ ‘  there’s only so much that can be done to repair old damage.  ’ ‘  things aren’t going as i hoped.  maybe if i die,  i can start over again?  better luck next time.  ’ ‘  this is not something to be proud of.  this is a tragedy.  ’ ‘  trying to get rid of me?  oh honey,  you’ll have to try much harder than that.  ’ ‘  trying to get under my skin?  you’re nothing more than a pesky itch.  ’ ‘  unlike you,  i can’t hide my identity when it becomes an inconvenience or a danger.  ’ ‘  weeping is for gods  &  martyrs,  we cannot afford such luxuries.  ’ ‘  would you even miss me?  ’ ‘  you are not important enough to earn an eternal place in my heart.  ’ ‘  you complain nonstop about being unloved  &  alone,  i can’t imagine what you’d be like if that were actually true.  ’ ‘  you don’t know what it’s like.  ’ ‘  you made this so fucking easy for me.  ’ ‘  you should see me as a threat.  i will tear down everything you know until there is nothing left of you.  i am a walking threat.  ’ ‘  you think i’m already gone,  but i’m still fighting.  ’ ‘  you think i’m dead,  but i’m just dying.  ’ ‘  you were never an addiction,  you were a fucking disease.  ’ ‘  you wouldn’t dare cross me.  i am god  &  you are the soil beneath my feet.  ’ ‘  your existence takes up so much more space in mine that we might as well be one entity.  ’ ‘  your fingers are so cold  &  bruised,  but you’re still slamming your fists again the barricade as if it makes a difference.  ’ ‘  your hair is tied in a noose  &  your fingernails are razor blades,  your lips are poison  &  i will gratefully kiss them.  ’ ‘  your hatred has a body count  &  we will not forget.  ’ ‘  your loss,  not mine.  ’ ‘  you’re a sick fuck.  you know that?  ’ ‘  you’re not gentle with me  &  i would never ask you to be.  ’ ‘  you’ve trapped yourself so thoroughly in your own mind that it’s not even a rut anymore,  it’s a pit.   ’

[sandcvstles]

hurt meme.

“ i got you. it’s gonna be okay, you’re going to be okay.”

“i feel like everyone’s miles away from me.”

“my mind is a dark place. you don’t want to be there.”

“i know this hurts, but you have to stay awake.”

“don’t close your eyes, please don’t close your eyes!”

“i just want to be numb, i don’t want to feel anything.”

“please don’t do this, don’t act like you care.”

“you don’t care, nobody cares, just leave.”

“you’re my friend, of course i fucking care.”

“i can’t give up on you, so please don’t give up on yourself.”

“i love you so much, i forgot what hating myself felt like.”

“i fucked up, why do you not care?”

“i can’t walk, just go on without me.”

“you have broken ribs, take it easy.”

“i have no idea how to do cpr.”

“whose blood is that?”

“apply pressure to the wound, don’t let go.”

“don’t you dare fucking let go!” 

“what the hell happened to you?” 

“are they dead? did you kill them?” 

“do you know what you’ve done?” 

“you’re either with me or against me.” 

“who the hell did this to you?” 

“are you alright? you hit your head pretty hard…” 

“i can’t see!! what’s happening to me?” 

“when was the last time you ate?” 

“what do you mean you’re fine? you are not fine!” 

 “i’m fine, it’s just a flesh wound, i’ll be okay.” 

“for how long? how long were you bottling this up?“ 

“there’s so much blood, you won’t last.” 

“are you… throwing up in there?” 

“why aren’t you eating?” 

“just breathe… you’re okay, i promise, just breathe.” 

“i can’t breathe, i can’t –” 

“i woke up, & you were gone.” 

“just tell me something, was it really worth it?” 

“it’s okay to hurt & breakdown. you don’t have to be strong all the time.”

[petrichoriisms]

tenccs:

he stares at her like she’s crazy for her first question. “uh, what? this isn’t fucking fight club. unless you’re, like, planning on turning it into fight club which i definitely wouldn’t recommend.” maybe he shouldn’t have brought up the support group at all, and kept it as another secret little thing of his like a dragon hoarding gemstones. nothing is sacred anymore; he should have learned that lesson by now.

his expression turns curious, eyes narrowing in a tiny bit of suspicion as if her previous statement had somehow made her less trustworthy, but then a glimmer sparks. mischievousness shines behind his blue eyes, his lips twitching into a faint and crooked grin. 

“between the two of us, you know, we could probably get something real fucking cool going.” he wouldn’t have to drive out of the state to go stormchasing if he was able to create the storms himself with a little bit of help. “dangerous, sure, but, like, real fucking cool looking.” 

❝ it could be fun, don’t you think? ❞  a joke, now, delia trying to spin whatever insecurity she held into something to make someone, anyone, laugh.  it was a stupid thought to begin with.  why would a support group turn into something violent like that anyways, with people talking about feelings?  she just knew how defensive she got, how much she hated talking about anything serious.  ❝ no, but i...  i just tend to suck sometimes, and don’t like it when people call me out on that. ❞ 

maybe that wasn’t her being entirely honest, but it was enough to explain herself for a little bit.  she didn’t want to fight people, but she never reacted with passiveness, especially now with her abilities having a mind of their own.  but that was enough to think about for the moment, topic continually moving towards something a little more exciting.

❝ i’m pretty good with the water part of everything ---  wind, not so much, but i’m getting there.  it could be the storm of the century, and no one would even have to get hurt. ❞  which would’ve probably been the best part of the whole thing.  ❝ it wouldn’t be dangerous if no one else was around.  if we kept it under wraps. ❞ 

[allisonargntsarchive]

[petrichoriisms]

❝ Tell me, are you happy now? ❞

❝ not always. ❞ 

no, that seemed nearly impossible.  being happy was difficult, even with bad days being less and less.  even with having some stability to hold on, even with having someone she could rely on more than anyone else in the past.  there was so much positivity she could use to make any bad moment a little better, but often delia needed to be reminded.  and, honestly, the best person to remind her was barry, his patience always astonishing her.  only some people could put up with someone like her, and he did even more than put up with her.  glancing over, a small smile briefly fell upon her lips, shoulder softly nudging him.

❝ but you give me hope that i can be more happy than not. ❞ 

@notintime  ||  lbr i already forgot what meme i reblogged  ||  accepting!

[kaatsrpmemes]

SET IT OFF: CINEMATICS  ( 2012 ) ———- SENTENCE STARTERS

     PART 1.

NIGHTMARE

❝ They’re coming creeping from the corner. ❞  ❝ All I know is that I don’t feel safe. ❞  ❝ But am I losing my mind? ❞ ❝ Not a creature in sight ❞ ❝ I wish this was over ❞ ❝ I wish that this was a dream, but— ❞ ❝ I created a monster, a hell within my head ❞ ❝ Oh, I’m so scared ❞ ❝ I’ve nowhere to go; I’m out on my own ❞ ❝ Awake me from my nightmare ❞ ❝ Wait, something doesn’t feel right ❞ ❝ I’ve been feeling this way for far too long ❞ ❝ Can anybody save me from myself? ❞ ❝ If only I knew how to fly ❞ ❝ Then I could convince myself this isn’t my time to die ❞ ❝ I’m right back where I was before ❞

SWAN SONG

❝ You don’t even bother anymore ❞ ❝ Pick up the phone ❞ ❝ I’ll admit, I’m impressed by your vanishing act. ❞ ❝ Place your bets on your best guess ❞ ❝ Draw the curtains, take the stage ❞ ❝ Hold your breath; here comes the turn ❞ ❝ This is where we all got burned ❞ ❝ Promises are broken ❞ ❝ Tell me, are you happy now? ❞ ❝ I guess our time ran out ❞ ❝ You left me alone ❞ ❝ I’m on my own ❞ ❝ Tell me where we went wrong ❞ ❝ Burn the pages, not the bridge ❞ ❝ Sew your wounds without a stitch ❞ ❝ I hope you’re listening ❞ ❝ Abandon the people who shaped who you are ❞ ❝ Selfish and thoughtless, you drown in the dark ❞ ❝ I hope that you realize the damage you’ve done ❞ ❝ You could not see light even staring at the sun ❞

PLASTIC PROMISES

❝ Just give me a chance ❞ ❝ I won’t blow it again ❞ ❝ She said with her fingers crossed; but she forgot about the mirror behind her. ❞ ❝ I’m done with plastic promises. ❞ ❝ Please don’t tell me that we’re fine ❞ ❝ I got too much on my mind ❞ ❝ Isn’t this too plain to see? ❞ ❝ We’ve lost too much to gain ❞ ❝ Tell me, what am I to do? ❞ ❝ Her lips are the gun and her tongue are the bullets ❞ ❝ She could save a life; she took mine away instead. ❞ ❝ We gave it our all, so don’t call me a quitter. ❞ ❝ Don’t try to defy or even make an attempt ❞ ❝ Am I ok? ❞ ❝ I know I’ll be ok again. ❞ ❝ You’d kill for everything to stay the same ❞ ❝ You proved to me that you would never change ❞ ❝ I finally woke up. ❞

I’LL SLEEP WHEN I’M DEAD

❝ It’s the same each and every night. ❞ ❝ I’m stuck self-torturing; my meds are failing me. ❞ ❝ Internal clock in smithereens. ❞ ❝ Can’t fix this, I’m hopeless. ❞ ❝ Notice my hands begin to twitch. ❞ ❝ Me and the TV are enemies. ❞ ❝ Sickening static surrounds my mind. ❞ ❝ Time stands still, but I cannot. ❞ ❝ I guess I’ll sleep when I am dead. ❞ ❝ Talk to myself, lie in the darkness so content. ❞ ❝ My sanity is spent. ❞ ❝ I’m losing it. ❞ ❝ Attention: All insomniacs, please raise your right hand. ❞

NO CONTROL

❝ It’s like watching a rose just wither away ❞ ❝ It’s like having a voice, with no chance to speak ❞ ❝ It’s something that you hold, and hold to keep ❞ ❝ Show me just a little mercy ❞ ❝ Help me, help me! I’m doing all I can ❞ ❝ I pretend I’m unaffected, but their pain became my burden ❞ ❝ I swear, this isn’t what I wanted ❞ ❝ God, this house is haunted ❞ ❝ And after all of this we’ve been through ❞ ❝ I wish that we could switch shoes ❞ ❝ This life ain’t fair for us all ❞ ❝ My ears resound with the sound of broken dreams ❞ ❝ Tell them to leave ❞ ❝ You’re coming home with me ❞ ❝ Remove that damn IV ❞ ❝ I wish my words could cure illness ❞ ❝ The door may have slammed in my face but the windows will heal my scars ❞ ❝ My walls are built and on display ❞ ❝ I drown in guilt due to dismay ❞ ❝ Maybe someday I can see how this has shaped me ❞ ❝ Bite my tongue, with swelling lungs ❞ ❝ I gasp for air and let this go ❞

DREAM CATCHER

❝ I’ve been sitting here for hours ❞ ❝ I set my standards high in hopes they will not fall apart ❞ ❝ It’s almost like I fell asleep ❞ ❝ My doubts have seemed to fade ❞ ❝ I’m right where I planned to be ❞ ❝ And I hope to god you’ll scream and shout ❞ ❝ It’s everything you wanted, maybe more ❞ ❝ Anyone can dream through the night ❞ ❝ Only some can dream with eyes wide ❞ ❝ There lies the fight inside, it resides in everyone ❞ ❝ They will proclaim you a fool ❞ ❝ Does it seem out of reach? ❞ ❝ Believe you’ll be a dream catcher ❞ ❝ Cry out loud and take the stage ❞ ❝ Don’t let skeptics slow your pace ❞ ❝ With every forward step you’ll take their breath away ❞ ❝ Cast your nets, cast it out ❞ ❝ And I hope to god you’ll scream and shout  ❞ ❝ It’s everything you wanted, maybe more ❞ ❝ Here’s a lesson that I hope to teach ❞

[dearladyaudrey]

[letelestrange-deactivated202002]

My advice for girls who are waiting for their Prince Charming is to be open for anything. Be open to new experiences, be open to the idea that it may take longer than you want, but if you’re open to meeting new people and new adventures, then love will come along. (x)

[petrichoriisms]

tenccs:

“uh, yeah. there’re a few who are kind of fucking crazy powerful.” he doesn’t have shit on them, and to be honest, he’s a little bit jealous. he can fuck around with electricity, but it’s not like he can bend reality or some shit. god, if only he could pull that shit off….

sam untangles his fingers, rubbing his palms down his thighs, and exhales heavily. it’s always so fucking hard to talk about this shit, even when it’s as casual as this, and he’s grateful when she decides to change the subject a little bit. 

“like hobbies and shit? yeah, i play guitar. i draw. i… write.” he’ll never say he writes poetry out loud or label it as such, but he damn well knows that’s what he does. “i used to do a lot of stormchasing, but new york isn’t the state for that kind of shit. the storms out here are too weak. what about you?” 

❝ so...  if there is a possibility of a fight, you think i’d lose? ❞  not that she needed anyone in her corner, or anyone telling her that she would win, but it would’ve been nice for her to have someone on her side.  even if she probably didn’t deserve it.

with the change in subject, things finally start to feel a little less forced, a little less like they needed to come to some conclusion.  brows knitting together at the mention of storm chasing, she couldn’t help but be a little amused about that. 

❝ y’know, i could probably help with that storm chasing thing.  those can be fun to make, it’s not because i’m panicking or something. ❞  but then the question was turned on her, her lips turning down into a frown.  there wasn’t a whole lot she was into anymore, more concerned with surviving rather than anything else.  ❝ eh...  i dunno.  drinking is fun, but that only does so much.  i kinda stopped with school when i got sick, and i haven’t been keeping up with a whole lot. ❞ 

[petrichoriisms]

fcllenson:

@petrichoriisms

                  “ i thought that you didn’t WANT my help. ” michael wasn’t going to leave her alone if she needed help, but the last time they met didn’t exactly go THAT well.

      ❝ i didn’t. ❞  but maybe she needed to learn a little more from her mistakes and know that isolation wasn’t the best thing for her.  especially now.  ❝ but things have been a little less than great recently.  figured you would be one of the few who didn’t hate me. ❞