woke smeed

• Call me Nix • 19 • They/She • Vaguely queer and girlish • Aspiring internet creative trying their best •

[pheonix-inside]

I WISH JACKSON HEALY AND HOLLAND MARCH WERE REAL SO I COULD SMOOCH EM.

[kentodreaming]

my guilty pleasure is gracerocky experiencing cabin fever about 50% into their journey to erid and getting into some nasty argument that they have to take space to recover from. except their codependency is in full effect to the point that grace is miserably trying to occupy himself while excruciatingly aware of just how empty the room feels without rocky tinkering behind him <- and annoyed at himself for noticing this. the knowledge that rocky can still fully perceive him just pisses him off somehow. eventually the silent RSD catastrophizing gets too much for him and he has to go attempt to salvage things. which to his credit he doesnt even fumble that bad

[wheup]

Also! I have said it before but it frustrates me so badly that it deserves its own post.

Stratt would have sent Grace if he had a wife and kids. Stratt would have forced him onto the mission if he had a beautiful family and a dog that loved him and parents he visited every weekend. At the end of the day it was always, always going to be the sacrifice of the few for the good of the many, and it would have made functionally very little difference if it was one man or a whole household. That line was not for her, or the crew, or any of the gaurds that she would eventually send after him. That line was for Grace, not to try to convince him that his life had no meaning, but to force him to confront that he had nothing to hide behind, to strip away his selfless defences before he could fall back on them, to lay out the problem as she saw it; him versus the world, him versus humanity. The reason that him 'pretending this is about the children' upsets her is because she has already tried to dismiss that, she has already hit that point, and the fact that he's returning to it with semantics tells her everything she needs to know.

[bulkhummus]

favorite trope is rocky not realizing graces glasses like. Actually do something

[pocket-dragon]

shmoving

[alienatedartt]

saw the ref photo and thought of her <3

[balloonatic69]

do you guys also think adrian and rocky lovingly headbutt eachother like cats cause i do

[helloilovefanfiction]

Inspired by this post by @balloonatic69

[asteronomical]

the funny thing about gracerocky with oblivious grace is that rocky is absolutely going through it. like he'd be thinking, "is leaky space blob STUPID, question? rocky try eridian courting. NO WORK! rocky try human courting. NO WORK EITHER! rocky try confessing. TRANSLATOR NOT TRANSLATE PROPERLY. 🎵🎵🎶🎵🎶!!!"

also i just know rocky is seething whenever he tries to talk about his feelings but the translator spits out some crude, chewed-up oversimplification of his confession that can still be reasonably construed as platonic. which grace absolutely does.

rocky: you are half of me, and i want us to be so inexplicably intertwined that it's hard to tell where i end and where you begin. love is too small of a word to encompass the depth of what i feel for you

translator: rocky love grace

grace: aw buddy i love you too!

[pheonix-inside]

Trying to write a weird story analyzing and criticizing various facets of American culture from the POV of someone living in a privileged area with a front row seat to some of the people by the root of the nonsense, but um. I'm a shut in and my idea has gotten too big to conceptualize. Plus I keep coming up with new things to add and now it's a broader idea about my childhood. But like. I also don't have the time/energy to poke at it. Especially at this scale. Besides you gotta give creative ideas time to rise on their own so. Harping on it wouldn't help much

But ughhhh the idea is so There and In My Head but. Sigh. It's hard to form. Mostly hard to make decisions bc so many options are cool!!!! I keep coming up with plots when will I settle!!!!!! 😭😭😭

[pheonix-inside]

Hi it's been like a year I have now written an entire concept album for this idea. Turns out I had to zoom in more actually. Now it's much more focused on like the American Nuclear Family structure, and in turn getting to show the Issues in the greater culture surrounding that by focusing on each character and some of their relationships.

It will not be coming out soon because I have a backlog of music I wanna work on first so I'll be better at all that by the time this album would be left. So. Oh well.

[pheonix-inside]

Jesus Christ my music has gotten emo as fuck pack it up back to therapy

[pheonix-inside]

Update I was already in therapy and didn't change anything but I wrote an EP and like half an album of other songs during this funk. If I get off my ass I may even try to work on them for production!

[pheonix-inside]

Welp my heart was once again broken by a fanfiction god damnit why do fictional characters have to be avoidant and not immediately resolve it (I know why. The plot. It is good writing. I'm just soft lol)

[pheonix-inside]

Y'know who confuses me? Theater kids with no sense of whimsy. You're a theater kid for fucks sake have some whimsy!!!!!

[pheonix-inside]

Breaking news, today a touchstarved theater kid had their shoulders affectionately touched by their scene partner multiple times in rehearsal. They cannot stop thinking about it. More at never.

[pheonix-inside]

Update on that from multiple years later I did not for once become cool and chill and in fact almost fell in love with the person and really only managed to avoid doing so because I was Seventeen and Scared.

[pheonix-inside]

Sometimes friendship is sharing pretzels and clasping your hands in a way that looks like stereotypical choir kids to calm down backstage.

[pheonix-inside]

Hi it's me from the future that tone indicator turned out to be a fuckin Lie

[pheonix-inside]

I love Pearl for her autistic neuroticism and her sword fighting skills.

[pheonix-inside]

Hot bitches stay up past their bedtime and cry