picfab's wonderland @picfab - Tumblr Blog

”Hey, you’re really making progress with the maths! Good work! But you know what? It smells like pee here. Could it be that someone around here has a really wet diaper? Yeah, now lie down here on the couch for mommy. You’ll be back in trigonometry in two minutes!”

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In the girls’ changing room

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Just got changed!

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Their sweet little junior co-worker

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Your doctor always knows best

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– We’ve been through this already. You obviously need diapers again. So we’re here to buy them.

– Yes mom, I know that. But can’t we just buy them online instead? Please?

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…

The owner of the little countryside B&B was deeply persuasive, in that simultaneously playful and authoritative manner mastered only by elder sisters. She had just informed me that her beds were very expensive, and that she could not know for certain which guest might be a bedwetter. Thus, all guests under thirty were required, without exceptions, to wear a diaper at night. Even if she had to ensure it herself.

Now, seeing how I blushed beet red and had begun to glance toward the front door (against my better judgment—the nearest other place to sleep lay many miles away), she tilted her head, patted the package of diapers with theatrical flair, and broke into a wide, welcoming smile. Anyone would recognize that kind of smile: The one a mother instinctively offers her toddler to coax them, before any real protest can erupt, into doing something they had absolutely no intention of doing.

– But sweetie, don’t be shy! They’re just for the night, and most people think they’re really comfy. Just a moment ago I helped the nice young woman in the other room putting on hers. So can you be a good boy now and take off those jeans?

Despite the woman’s friendly smile, which continued as she began to roll out a changing mat on top of the bed, it was clear that her last words were less of a question than a command. I started to unbuckle my belt.

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