[piercedthing]

He/Him 18 Androgyne Freak

This is a side blog where I post about my brain. I will mainly talk about ASPD, Schizophrenia, and general violent urges.

My interest in kink stems from curiosity and entertainment. My medication makes me sex-averse. I don't post anything overtly sexual, only general discussions.

This is my form of harm reduction and I don't condone non-consensual acts.

18+ interactions only please. I block freely and it means nothing malicious.

[peerless-outlaw]

I think people miss the "transactional" part when I talk about my relationships. Transactional means there's a transaction, an exchange. If you're significant enough to me for whatever reason, I don't mind doing things for you. I might even do them unprompted. Yes, I will always prioritize myself, but otherwise I'm fine with doing things that don't conflict with my goals and my well-being.

The reason why I don't often go out of my way to do simple things for others is that they don't offer enough, even for that. Which is also part of the reason why it's easy to notice when I value someone a lot.

Of course, this may not apply to every antisocial, but it does for me. I've never had much of an issue with these things, they're simple enough and they help me maintain relationships that benefit me.

[peerless-outlaw]

Sometimes the boredom gets so bad all of a sudden, almost like a kind of rush or spike, and it drives me insane. I can be dealing with the usual baseline and a couple minutes later I genuinely want to die from understimulation.

[piercedthing]

I have a lot of violent thoughts and urges and I don't really want to hurt anyone in particular. I think it's the act that interests me. I harm myself because I like the act, not the pain. I don't like feeling pain but it doesn't matter as long as I get to harm something. This is my method of harm reduction. A lot of my coping mechanisms would be objectively unhealthy and I never recommend any of them but they do work for me and that's all I care about.

[sadhoc]

there is a very real tendency of teenagers with anxiety disorders self diagnosing with considerably more stigmatized and impairing mental illnesses (e.g. schizophrenia, DID, personality disorders), but the best response to that isn't to get angry with them for "appropriating" lol. instead you show them coping resources for the problems they're actually having and deemphasize diagnostic categories in general. if an 18 year old is claiming to have alzheimer's, they're probably making an innocent mistake and are in genuine distress. be kind.

[mariaalenkoshepard]

Also I think this trend comes, at least in part, from how brushed aside anxiety disorders can be. If your parents and teachers dismiss you with 'oh everyone feels anxious', then inevitably you're going to start thinking that there must be something else going on with you

[lightblueminecraftorchid]

”You must feel very scared right now; let’s talk about how to help you personally, tailored to your symptoms” will always be more helpful than “stop faking (X) for attention”. If theyre that desperate for attention or an explanation, something is wrong.

[aspd-girl]

Same goes for aspd/cd/psychopathy. I dont think most teens who suspect hsving it know what they are claiming for themselves and what kind of trouble they may bring themselves into with such a label. But such identifying happens for a reason. One, they often do not know the severity such disorder brings with it, that "lacks empathy" is not just "not feeling along with others ". Secomd, the wrong impressions distributed through hoolyeood media, movies, etc.

Thies, i think resorting to a more drasric disorder can be a cry for help because needs are mot met until its almost too late. Please take the worries of teens seriously. It is the years where peesonalities are shaped the most?

[permarotten]

people scare me a little bit. the idea that someone else has their own thoughts, opinions, and ideas is out of this world for me. I can't comprehend that a person is ... a person. it's odd because I can understand another person fine. I can put myself in their shoes, I can decode unwritten social rules, and yet, I still can't fathom that other people have minds. I find myself feeling paranoid because if someone can think, then someone can plan, and if someone can plan, then they can plan horrible things. paradoxically, I tend to assume that people have malicious intentions while believing most people are benevolent. schizophrenia makes me feel weird about other people. they feel almost like aliens. sometimes, it makes me hyper aware of myself as well. I become 10x more aware of my thoughts, feelings, and self to the point I become detached with reality. does anyone else experience the same thing?

[piercedthing]

Being on antidepressants made me realize that it wasn't just the depression. I feel different and not as pathetic but I feel like I've reverted back to when I was a child and constantly angry and exploding at anybody who was in my way.

[piercedthing]

I dream of people I know doing bad things so that I finally get a reason to hate them. My brain wants me to hate and it's trying to justify it with my dreams.

[piercedthing]

I have a lot of dreams where I get extremely angry and I try to hit people but my limbs get so weak and I can't. Then I get extremely frustrated and start yelling, then I wake myself up because I was screaming in my sleep. I wake the other people in my house at least once a week.

[tshotcenobite]

You look handsome in that mask, don’t you?

[piercedthing]

To me, eroticism exists in a completely different realm to sexuality. I am somewhat repulsed by the thought of involving myself in a sexual act. However, a lot of things are erotic to me. They are extreme and intrigue me greatly. I am very entertained by them. While sexual relationships aren't something I desire, I still enjoy the culture and discussions surrounding extreme kinks.