Just another pilot. Just another mutt. @pilot-5513-jester - Tumblr Blog

Overstimulate that hound till it's a dripping mess, and it's panting desperately for you.

It's what's best for it ♥

For all the hounds with a guilt lever.

I understand, I do. You've been doing your best to live your life in the way they expect you to. But I don't. I know what you are.

They expect so much and when you fail to deliver it's only natural to question whether you deserve the rewards at the end. Whether you deserve to feel good about yourself. It can stop thinking that now.

Listen to My voice.

You are a hound, you do not need to adhere to the standards of people. And you should not be punished for this. You're doing so good, wherever you are in the process, I want you to know that I'm proud of you.

And good hounds get rewards, don't they? Good hounds get treated by their Handler. Handler wouldn't give anything unless it was deserved, would They?

You don't need to answer that, hound. You just need to repeat after Me.

It deserves nice things.

Whenever it feels low, when the burdens of society hang heavy on its heart. With its own voice, I want it to say:

It deserves nice things

It knows this, it wants it. And it deserves it.

It. Deserves. Nice. Things.

When it is asked what it deserves, it will smile to itself because it knows what it deserves.

It deserves nice things.

Now hound, tell Me;

What does it deserve?

apuffofpink

the techs and supply officers are mad at me again because apparently railcannons “shouldn’t be used for finishing off an enemy mech at point blank” and the “thing needs it’s barrel replaced again and I should stop doing that”

like c’mon, whats the point of a rail rifle if not to press it’s barrel against an enemy mech’s cockpit hatch and feel a moment of unholy connection before proving im strong enough to do what’s required????

The mutt's loose, and its Handler is letting it run around base dressed like that??

#mechsplo #mechsploitation #hound #houndposting #mech pilot #handler/hound #girl frame #girlframe #transfem

ijwt-art

All tuckered out

averythebitchfrommercury

Fucking this robot girl and she pops out her heatsinks after an orgasm like an armored core after a core expansion

heckeronincheese

Rehabilitation of older gen hounds to work the desk jobs seems to have helped with the budget. But can we not fuck them during office hours!? I have reports i need authorization for. And if you try to get frisky with me my handler would love to give you a 45. Lobotomy... free of charge.

Not on the field anymore. They're still protective of me. I don't mind.

Likes to fill me in on the new hounds she has to train but still makes time for an old dog like me.

Glad my old mech is getting some use too..

Mix of balam scraps and arasaka firmware.

She's seen some shit. Older gen. I got from an old terran vendor. But the old autocannons seem to still sing.

Ik they're antiques but they still punch through hulls like tissue paper in the right hands.

Sometimes I yearn for a sortie.

Air dense with gunpowder,sweat,and uncertainty instead of printer ink and stale coffee.

But my days are past.

Fly high you spry mutts.

And for the love of fuck close your comms when youre in heat. We can't be wasting all our archival carts on your pathetic moans..

anarchoshanties

Right, so, here's what's gonna happen, mutt.

You're gonna be piloting your little mech on some battlefield or another. You're doing well, turning the tide. I'm sure you think you're the next Little Miss Rebel Ace, real hot shit.

Suddenly, you're going to be swarmed by half a dozen mechs. Not even competently - I'm not going to waste my prize hounds on a mutt like you - but with mindless ferocity.

You'll take down one or two, I'm sure. Perhaps even three. But the rest of them will tear through your wiring, rip open your coolant piping, and render your precious Memento Mori inert.

You'll try to escape, I'm sure, or perhaps take your own life to prevent capture.

My dogs won't allow it. I won't allow it

They will spring from their bodies of steel, scrambling up to the cockpit, wrenching it open to get at the vulnerable flesh within.

They will wrench you to the ground, disarm you, tear the clothes off your body.

Then, and only then, will you see Me.

I will stride into the cockpit, lifted there on the open hand of my personal escort mech. In my hands will be an electrobrand. It will slowly heat up, as you are forced to the ground, hounds restraining your limbs.

‪‬I will pass the red-hot brand to an assistant. I do not sully my hands with mutts.

They will burn my mark into your flesh, forever claiming you as my own.

You will be taken back, along with your useless mech, and I will break you, slowly. Gleefully. I will enjoy it.

You will learn to, too.

When you are finally and truly remade, I will take you out of the kennels by the leash. I will take you to a seating area. You will be allowed to briefly glance at the field we are overlooking.

There will be a mech standing there. 'Memento Mori,' its inscription reads. It will mean nothing to you.

‪‬I will take a seat, and instruct you to kneel. I will present my boot to you. You will know what to do. You relish it.

When first you mount my boot, a thunderclap will sound, though the sky is clear. An anti-tank round will be shot from miles and miles away, and it will impact Memento Mori.

It tears out chunks of new plating - I had it fully refurbished for this.

Another missile impacts.

Then another.

I will allow you to begin rutting as Memento Mori is torn to shreds in front of me.

You do not look. You do not care to. It is meaningless to you.‪‬

All you can think of is my boot, how good it makes you feel. Nothing else matters anymore.

I will enjoy the sight of your once-proud mech being reduced to rubble as target practice, while the mutt that thought it was a pilot fucks away the last of its memories against the black leather of my boot.

This is what will happen to you, mutt. And you will thank me for it.

[If you liked this, check out my other work! ♡]

thehangarqueen

Best Snacks for a Pilot!

Hey Handlers, former Hound speaking. I know you asshole hate fun and snacks, but considering I just finished pasting a bunch of fuckheads who refused to feed their Hounds basic MREs and only used The Paste, I'm making this as a way to save you from your own stupidity. Let your Hounds snack, it's good for the mind and keeps them happy. And no, a single almond does not count as a snack, don't be a suburbanite beige mom with an eating disorder. Without further ado, here's the best fuckin snacks for your freaky beasties when they get hungry:

Jerky. I've ranted about it before, and I'll say it again. High protein, stimulating to eat, works the jaw to prevent the muscles from weakening, it's great! Honorable mention goes to any kind of cured meats that are shelf stable and snackable during flights, especially shoutout to pemmican for being versatile very versatile.

Trail Mix. A classic for a reason, customize it for each of your Hounds' tastes for an even better response! Trust me, making it by purchasing bulk ingredients saves you money in the long term. Also, for further brain stimulation, you can have the Hounds pack their own snack bags for missions, with supervision of course.

Peanut-Butter Pretzel Bites. I don't know what mad bitch thought of these things, but HOLY FUCK! These are a personal favorite, rivaling jerky depending on how drunk I am. Have these on a mission or off mission, and they're perfect. Goes great with beer and/or sports drinks.

Tuna+Crackers snack packs. Ok these are my absolute favourite, specifically the chili ones with an actual pepper inside. Slice some cheese up to go with them, and they're a perfect late-night snack. They do smell quite strong, but frankly, you've probably smelled worse in the kennels or Handler breakroom. Honorable mention to tinned herring fillets, delicious.

Instant hotpots. Ok, don't give these to the lobotomite Hounds, or they will make a mess. However, if you've got a Hound on a long deployment, pack a few of these alongside the normal MREs. They taste great, they've got lots of meat and veg, and they get just as hot if not hotter than the MREs. Praise be water-activated heating packs, my beloveds.

Bread. Deadass just some bread. Doesn't even need to be garlic bread, just some proper fuckin rolls and an optional spread to go with it. No notes, bread just good.

Hardboiled eggs, with optional mayo. Alternatively, just a tub of egg salad with a spoon. Godddd this shit is good when you're craving eggs and want to egg-max. I just typically put mayo on the eggs between bits and make egg salad in my mouth, because I'm a disgusting little freak. Deviled Eggs are my absolute favourite of this, and I will be bribed any day by those, because they aren't my favourite snack food, but instead one of my favourite buffet items. Yes I have multiple conditional lists, I'm a foodie.

A jar of pickles. Yes, I'm not joking, if your Hound was something tangy when piloting and you don't mind the cockpit smelling briny, give them a jar of pickles. The large gherkins are the best, and chugging a cold jar of pickle juice hits better than a sports drink I find... fuck one sec I have a jar in my fridge I need to go deal with...

And that's a list of snacks to give your pilots! Just remember: at the bare minimum, I expect to see the MREs. If I get another malnourished Hound in my hangar, someone is getting crucified by my rivet gun.