Kirk 🤑💸

Prostitute Lars Ulrich’s master

[pimpkirkhammett]

Please read!

Hello, my pimps & prostitutes. Long time no see. I must say, it has been a wild month. So many things have happened. That being said, I have devastating news. Along with my newfound lung cancer, @prostitutelarsulrich has left me. A few days ago, he asked me to talk. He has decided that he is no longer interested in the prostitute life, and want's to lead his own as an independent woman. I am very upset on how he could do such a thing to me, but, I protested no further. Because of this, Pimp Kirk and Prostitute Lars are officially, no more. I'm sorry. For real this time, we hope your life's and new year go smoothly. Goodbye.

[pimpkirkhammett]

PIMP KIRK RETURN

I have been diagnosed with cancer in my lungs.

[pimpkirkhammett]

Me walking @prostitutelarsulrich. He loves being tied up and choked by me. ❤️

[garageinc]

I hate myself for drawing tjis, anime about ypu guys would be fire btw

[pimpkirkhammett]

HOLY FUCKING SHIT THIS IS AMAZING

[pimpkirkhammett]

Hello...I usually know you as an omega, but you certainly have the vibes of an alpha...you're welcome in my pack anytime 🐺

Oh my. You are quite the intimidator. I will tread lightly around you. Alpha James Hetfield.

[pimpkirkhammett]

This roleplay shit get serious! Goddamn! I’m out!

[pimpkirkhammett]

Dude, respectfully, the reason ppl keep coming at you is because you’re popping up in ppl’s inboxes asking to roleplay sex work with zero precedent. It’s something that can put a lot of people on edge and a plotline that requires prior discussion. And then when people point out you’re being weird about it and set a boundary (because you are making them uncomfortable) you double down and claim they just as weird. We’ve already had to deal with someone who would drop serious and triggering plotlines with no warning and ignore boundaries before, and it put everyone on edge. Cool your fucking jets dude.

Do you think we’re serious? This is not an actual roleplay. We’re mocking you. Was that not obvious? lol.

[pimpkirkhammett]

Whyare we roleplaying prostitution Hello???First of all, literally ILLEGAL. Second of all, that's extremely weird? I genuinely don't know if this is supposed to be a joke or serious but either way it's not okay because whatthefart. Prostitution was a genuine problem when it was legal and roleplaying it is extremely ignorant, think about all the women that were exploited that way; they are ROLLING intheir graves rightnow. These are also REAL people btw. I can literally smell your stenchthrough the screen. This is weird! Please get help!

Did I hit a nerve?

[gyatt-the-life-deactivated20250]

Yes! Hope this helps! 🤍

[pimpkirkhammett]

Uhmmmmm why are you making FUH.. FUH.. FANFICTIONS?? OF…. REAL… PEOPLE???? Dude! Get help! What the fuck man! My grandma got ran over by a man who made fanfictions. That is SO IGNORANT! Whatthefart!

[pimpkirkhammett]

do you file taxes? is that complicated? so are you liek a corporation qnd have to claim prostitutelars as an employee or is it freelance? t hanks.

A freelance trying to build up as a corporation. Apparently we are an evil one, though. People don’t like it and are denying becoming Pimps and Prostitutes.

[pimpkirkhammett]

are you and prostitute lars the same people like irl running the accounts

No, There is two of us.

[pimpkirkhammett]

you and all the other “pimps and prostitutes” are disgusting, stop being little freaks and get off the internet

Thank you for this life changing take, anon. This affected me greatly.

[pimpkirkhammett]

Can pimps have normal hobbies? In movies you only ever see them for like one scene or they die.

I have a painting hobby. When I am done with my creations, I usually glaze them over with my own semen.

[pimpkirkhammett]

i love you guys keep up the good work bro!

Thank you, my favorite Pimp! I’m not sure why people are bothering you in your asks. You did no wrong!

[pimpkirkhammett]

You and prostitute Lars are a beautiful couple ❤🤧

Thank you, anon. We are thinking of having children. Our genes will mix well.

[pimpkirkhammett]

Whyare we roleplaying prostitution Hello???First of all, literally ILLEGAL. Second of all, that's extremely weird? I genuinely don't know if this is supposed to be a joke or serious but either way it's not okay because whatthefart. Prostitution was a genuine problem when it was legal and roleplaying it is extremely ignorant, think about all the women that were exploited that way; they are ROLLING intheir graves rightnow. These are also REAL people btw. I can literally smell your stenchthrough the screen. This is weird! Please get help!

Did I hit a nerve?

[pimpkirkhammett]

Girl is u a satire/rage bait account💜

(Asking politely!!)

No! Me and Prostitute Lars have a strong love and bond for each other. We are just blogging our adventures!

[pimpkirkhammett]

Should I become pimp Dave in the metallica era???

That would be amazing, please do. We need Pimp Dave!

[pimpkirkhammett]

Hey I'm gonna need postitute tommy back

Take him back. He forgot to clean his asshole, when I put it in and pulled back out, there was shit! Take him, for free!