Today's Document
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
Sade Olutola
No title available
izzy's playlists!
Noah Kahan
Origami Around
if i look back, i am lost
Stranger Things
pixel skylines
★
The Stonewall Inn
Show & Tell
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Misplaced Lens Cap
Monterey Bay Aquarium
Mike Driver
No title available
oozey mess
seen from Türkiye
seen from Indonesia
seen from United States
seen from Australia
seen from Canada
seen from Czechia
seen from United States
seen from Pakistan
seen from Colombia
seen from Japan
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Japan
seen from United States
seen from Brazil
seen from Philippines
seen from Türkiye
seen from Canada
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
@pine-apples
While I'm alive, I never want to be such an awful person to the people in my life that one, I estrange my loved ones, and two, the aforementioned estranged loved ones only attend my funeral out of obligation and treat it as a "get-it-over-and-done-with" ordeal.
I really need to get an apartment
Love rolling out of bed to hear your parents making snarky remarks at each other (and at you bc you made the mistake of making eye contact) because they're in a bad mood.
What was supposed to take 30 minutes took 2 hours instead. I fucked up the form so badly that I'll probably have to start over because it will be easier than trying to fix whatever the hell I did wrong.
I just hope that starting over doesn't make things worse.
I'm going to fight my brain in a Denny's parking lot.
I made a moodboard for how the first 6 months of 2025 felt like:
I made one for the other half of 2025
I'm so glad this job is almost over. I've been ready to quit for over a year now.
Just had somebody come in, talking with food in their mouth and taking bites mid-sentence, and here I am trying to understand a word that's coming out of his mouth. He just stares at me, chewing with his mouth open, acting like I understood any of the words that left his mouth.
Please, stop eating for two minutes and repeat yourself so that I can help you.
Sometimes, I wonder if my mother can sense when I'm feeling shitty and when I'm in a good mood because she seems to have a knack for sending texts that knock me done a peg or three from the dread alone.
I hate the whole "well, they're family!" narrative to pressure someone into "making peace" with someone who couldn't care less.
"Oh but they're family!" Yeah, and they are just as capable of "making peace" if they wanted to, but they didn't. They chose not to, and that's not my fault. I am not responsible for the choices of others.
"Oh but they're family!" Maybe, but whether or not you consider them family doesn't matter because having a familial relationship or blood connection to someone doesn't excuse or justify their harmful behavior.
In a relationship of any kind – familial in my case – it takes two to build it, two to maintain it, and two to repair it if and when it's damaged or broken, and yet, the responsibility is disproportionately placed on the child (including grown-up children) to make, maintain, and repair that relationship regardless of if the other person reciprocated your efforts. And when you inevitably fail (because you're putting in 100% effort while they give 0%), you bear the blame and burden. When it fails, you're blamed for "not doing enough," "not trying hard enough," not doing enough of this or that, which is internalized as you "not being enough" for a person who couldn't give a flying fuck about you. Oh, but they're family, so you're pressured to keep trying, and you're villainized when you reciprocate their disinterest.
My boss keeps changing instructions on me, and I'm contemplating getting it in writing so that the next time she changes it (and denies changing it), I can pull it up and show her what she said and when.
Just when I think I understand workplace social interactions, something happens, and when I think I handle it naturally, somebody will tell me later that I didn't.
I show up to work. I smell food, and when I look toward the far end of the floor, I see coworkers from another department congregated around one of the offices. I head upstairs and find the desk unoccupied – not even the other student-worker is there. Odd, yet semi-normal at this point. Okay? I'll just get to work.
Ten minutes go by, and I'm still thinking about whatever was going on by the office. Maybe my boss and coworker are there too? I sure as shit don't know. I'm the last to know things. But I'm wondering still, scanning the contents of folders while I think back to roughly a year or two ago. It was about this time of year when the staff held a mini Christmas party on the ground floor. My boss invited me and the other student-workers to join the fun.
Maybe that's what they're doing? I'm still irritated at the stupid scanner because the cold makes it malfunction (they shut off the heat once the semester is over; I'm contemplating getting my coat), so I push it out of my mind. I see a coworker walk by, and I recognize him from the department downstairs.
An hour goes by and still, the floor is empty except for me, the previous guy leaving once he found the right book. I smell hash browns and bacon. Another hour later, and my coworker (same dept as me) returns without a word. At least there's two of us now to watch the desk.
I finish scanning. My boss still isn't around. I set to work uploading everything into the archives. Another hour goes by, I'm nearly finished, and my boss returns. We exchange hellos and friendly noises. I don't ask about the Christmas or birthday party on the ground floor; she doesn't mention it either. In hindsight, I'm wondering if I should have asked.
I get home from work, and I start chit chatting about my day to my family. The topic of the mystery party and the odd (ish?) behavior comes up, and I get about halfway through explaining when I see my step mom stare at me like I've slandered my boss's mother. I feel like I've picked the wrong dialogue option here. I'm aware of the topic, but now I'm wondering about my tone.
She asks if I was explicitly told I was or wasn't invited; I tell her they neither invited nor disinvited me, and I just went to work. She then told me if I was invited to it last time (one or two years ago), then I was still invited and I could've joined them.
Huh?
That doesn't make sense to me. We go back and forth for a bit—I try clarifying, and she keeps interrupting; it's a separate issue. I'm even more confused than I was earlier. It's an office party of some kind. Some were asked to join and some weren't.
If I'm not invited, then I'm not invited. To me it seems rude to waltz right up and insert myself into someone else's party, and let's face it: I'm *assuming* it was the Christmas party, the same one they had one or two years ago. We've had new people come and go since then, so it could have been a birthday party instead. Or a retirement party. Or a happy-monday-the-twenty-second party for all I know. Hell, it might not have been a party at all, and somebody brought in a spouse's breakfast that morning and stayed to chat with them. My boss disappears frequently, leaving the desk unoccupied, so that's not odd behavior.
My stepmom then tells me how they perceived my behavior. By going upstairs and getting to work, they took it as disinterest and decided not to come upstairs to pester me. She also says it wouldn't be self-invitation if I had just joined instead of excluding myself.
I'm blinking at my screen here. It may or may not have been an office party??? In a neighboring department??? How was I rude??? Why is she saying I purposefully excluded myself??? I didn't care whether I was invited or not; I was annoyed at being left alone at the desk again.
What the hell am I not understanding? Was I supposed to join? Was I supposed to ask about it? What the hell is the "correct" answer here?
I hate sounding like a broken record.
How many times do I need to tell somebody: "I've got it covered. Please get out of the kitchen." (And I legitimately have a system here) before they listen?
Once is apparently not enough. No, I need to say it a dozen fucking times before they sit down just outside the kitchen, right at the line dividing living room from kitchen.
Oh but wait, they sit on the border and chime in like a peanut gallery, telling me to do this, that, or the other. I can't tell them to leave the kitchen if they're not technically IN the kitchen, now can I?
"I have it covered."
"I have it taken care of."
"I'm good, everything's covered."
"I'm handling things just fine."
"No, I don't need to do this, that, or the other."
Just get the fuck out of my kitchen before I hurl the entire silverware drawer's contents at you.
(Put down the pitchforks, I'm not seriously considering violence)
If he tells me one more fucking time how I SHOULD be cooking dinner, I will shove the turkey in his hands and tell him to take care of Thanksgiving for me while I sit and relax.
(He'll bitch about the food not being the way HE wanted it no matter what I do anyway)
The professor signed the class up for shit without informing us beforehand, so I get to complete shit on the fly (again)
Sometimes, I think I'd have a better conversation with a brick wall.
My professor keeps adding and removing assignments without telling us prior to the start of class, and I'm *this* close to losing my mind.
"Oh you must not have been looking hard enough" or "You must have misheard me. I said..."
NO, NO, NO. I TOOK PHOTOS. IT WASN'T THERE YESTERDAY WHEN I TOOK THE PHOTO, BUT IT'S HERE NOW.
Me: we need to go or we'll be late (reminder #3)
Him: *takes a 30 minute bathroom break*
Me, contemplating leaving w/o him:
I should not have stayed up till 2am
I feel like I've been hit by a bus, but the driver decided to floor it in reverse and run me over again
Time to rage-write a paper in however long it takes to finish it or until I crash, whichever happens first