I keep thinking about D3rlord3 saying Avery āshowed him all the beauty of the universeā and going a little insane over it because what do you MEAN all the beauty of the universe. You have seen everything. You have brushed up against infinity. You have knowledge beyond human scale. And your conclusion is still this spectacularly lonely loser (I mean that with all the love in my heart), made your existence beautiful again.
I'M DISTRAUGHT. The tragedy isnāt even that they met. It's that d3rlord3 had the capacity to understand infinity, but only learned how to value something finite right before he died. And of course it had to be another loser. Of course it had to be someone equally out of place and equally lonely and not built for any of this. The worst part about their dynamic is that if they had met earlier, it might have saved him. And if they had met later, it might have destroyed Avery too, but they met at the exact point where d3rlord was already too far goneāthe ONLY possible moment where love could not save them.
(I need everyone to be sicker about them immediately.)
We know so little about D3rlord3 but I canāt help but think his life must have been a pretty lonely one.
If we think about it, he stayed days maybe weeks inside, glued to his computer to not lose his mind, only feeding off of smoothie he had on hand and not one person in his life checked on him?
No family or friends, not even a colleague or classmate asked themselves where he went ?
Itās even more obvious when we learn itās new years eve yet no one seem to have reached out to D3rlord3 to celebrate with him.
Lastly, his first thought when in the face of his impeding doom is not directed at anyone other than Avery. Maybe he didnāt have the time, maybe he left other things in the real world for his loved one but we donāt know that.
Again for all we know, he died alone, on new years eve, with no one but Avery to mourn him and I canāt help but feel so sad about it.
On a more serious note, it always irks me when people are hypercritical of SU, especially about the queer representation.
Like, yes. Media can and should be critiqued. We can acknowledge flaws and show growth. But sometimes the tone feels less like thoughtful critique and more like people trying to prove how morally superior and woke they are in 2026 by dissecting a show that aired years ago.
And while thatās happening, all I can think about is my younger self. My very closeted younger self. In a tiny religious town. I grew up being told that queer people, people just like me, were disgusting. That we were sinful. That we were going to hell. That we deserved to get k!lled liked dogs in the street.
Then, when I found that show online, it was the first time I saw characters who loved the way I loved and that werenāt framed as a cautionary tale. Their queerness wasnāt a joke. It wasnāt tragic punishment. It wasnāt something to be cured. It justā¦ existed. And it was soft. And it was beautiful.
That didnāt fix everything in my life. It didnāt make my town safer. It didnāt make the possibility of being outed any less terrifying. But it made the world feel a little less suffocating. A little bit softer. It made being a queer kid a little less lonely.
So when people reduce that show to a list of everything it didnāt do perfectly, I canāt detach that from what it meant to kids like me, who were starving for even a glimpse of themselves in something kind.
And now, years later, when I see so many shows with openly queer characters with stories where weāre heroes, lovers, complicated, messy, alive, I feel grateful. Because shows like SU helped crack the door open, even if it wasnāt perfect and even if it had to work within limits that people now conveniently forget existed.
It wasnāt perfect. But for some of us, it was the first proof that we werenāt alone.
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