I HATE YOU | scarlett johansson
come on, come on, don't leave me like this, i thought i had you figured out, something's gone terribly wrong, you're all i wanted. come on, come on, don't leave me like this, i thought i had you figured out, can't breathe whenever you're gone, can't turn back now, i'm haunted.
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main m. list || whispers of heartache m. list
Y/N's:
They say love is supposed to make you happy.
Mine just hurts.
I don’t know when it started—when the bickering stopped being just for fun and when her sharp words started to cut too deep. Maybe it was always this way, and I just refused to see it.
But still… I can’t stop.
I can’t stop loving her.
I follow her like a shadow, annoy her until she rolls her eyes, laugh just to see her scowl. Everyone teases us, calls us an old married couple, and I let them—because deep inside, I wish it were true.
But the truth is cruel. She doesn’t see me the way I see her. To her, I’m just noise. A useless girl. A tail she can’t shake off.
And yet, I stay. Because I’d rather be hated by her every day than live a single day without her.
But maybe… maybe one day, she’ll realize.
Or maybe she won’t—until I’m gone.
The afternoon sun painted the school courtyard in shades of gold. Students lingered, some laughing, some rushing off to beat the traffic. In the middle of the chaos, Scarlett Johansson sat on the bench with her friends, arms crossed, glaring at the one person she swore she hated.
Y/N.
Y/N had always been a thorn in Scarlett’s side—or at least, that’s what Scarlett told herself. In reality, she had grown used to the way Y/N’s presence filled every space she entered. But on that day, just like always, the teasing started.
“I really hate you,” Scarlett muttered, loud enough for her friends but not loud enough to draw attention from others, folding her arms and glaring.
Y/N leaned casually against the bench, lips curved into that teasing smile Scarlett hated more than anything—and secretly, maybe, craved.
“Yeah, yeah. I love you too.” Y/N replied with a giggle, her eyes sparkling with mischief.
“Can you please just leave?” Scarlett groaned, though the corner of her mouth twitched as if fighting back a smile.
“Are you sure you really want me to leave?” Y/N asked, tilting her head teasingly.
“God, she’s so annoying,” Scarlett grumbled to her friends, pretending Y/N wasn’t there.
“I like her too,” Y/N said lightly, earning a round of laughter from everyone.
well... everyone except Scarlett.
Lizzie nudged her with a smirk. “You guys act like an old married couple,” Lizzie said, laughing at the sight of the two of them bickering.
“Gross,” Scarlett shot back, scrunching up her nose.
Y/N pressed a hand dramatically to her chest. “Just admit it, Johansson. You like me too.” Y/N said casually, letting out a playful sigh.
“Yeah, Scarjo, admit it,” Robert teased, earning a harsh glare from Scarlett.
“And, you guys look good together,” Jeremy added, grinning.
Scarlett rolled her eyes so hard it was a miracle they didn’t get stuck. Y/N, though, laughed so freely the sound seemed to lift the air. Scarlett clenched her fists, and groaned, looking as though she was ready to throw hands, pretending not to notice how her chest tightened.
The bell rang, saving her. “Saved by the bell,” Y/N said, with that infuriating grin before walking away. Scarlett exhaled in relief, but her gaze followed Y/N longer than she would ever admit.
What none of them realized—what Scarlett refused to see—was that Y/N wasn’t just teasing. She really liked Scarlett.
Really, really liked her.
She was like a shadow, always there, always by Scarlett’s side, even when she was called annoying. It wasn’t a normal crush, something that faded over time. This was deeper.
Y/N was in love.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
Later, in class, Y/N sat by the window, scribbling in her notebook. Hailee—Y/N’s best friend—leaned over, chin propped on her hand.
“So,” she whispered, “how’s it going with Miss Frowny Face?”
Y/N smirked, amused. “You seriously gonna call her that forever?”
“Forever,” Hailee replied. “So? Did she threaten to kill you yet, or are we in the silent treatment era?”
“Oh, you know. Like normal,” Y/N said flatly, shrugging her shoulders.
Hailee sighed. “Why don’t you just give up already? She’s not paying attention to you. She only sees you as annoying and pain in the ass. She doesn’t like you. She just… tolerates you. Barely.” Hailee said, resting her head on the table.
Y/N closed her notebook, staring out the window. Her voice was barely audible. “Why don’t you shut up, hmm?” Y/N replied, though she smiled faintly.
Hailee blinked, recognizing the fragile edge in her tone. After a moment, she whispered softly, “Whatever you say. But for what it’s worth, I’m always here.”
Y/N smiled faintly. “I know.”
But what she didn’t say was that she couldn’t give Scarlett up. Not when Scarlett had become the very pulse of her days.
Days passed, and the routine continued. Y/N would find Scarlett after classes, teasing her, walking beside her until they went their separate ways. Y/N’s heart beat faster every time she saw her, and even Scarlett’s eye rolls felt like some form of acknowledgment.
But one afternoon, Y/N noticed something different. The hallway was unusually quiet that afternoon. Scarlett’s face was darker, her brows drawn, her lips pressed thin.
Scarlett walked fast, her bag slung over her shoulder, face tense. Y/N jogged to catch up, heart skipping at the sight of her.
“Hey,” Y/N said softly, walking up beside her. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” Scarlett muttered, eyes straight ahead.
Y/N frowned. Normally Scarlett would snap back with some sarcastic comment, not this cold, clipped tone.
“You sure? Your face says otherwise.” Y/N nudged her gently.
“Scarlett, you can tell me anything, you know,” Y/N said softly.
“I’m fine,” Scarlett repeated, voice sharper this time.
Scarlett froze, spinning around. Her eyes blazed with something raw—anger, pain, exhaustion. “Jesus Christ, can’t you just shut up for once? Don’t you have anything better to do than follow me around like a lost puppy? I told you I’m fine! Why can’t you get it? I don’t need your help, and I don’t want your help!”
Y/N stepped back, startled. Her grip tightening on the strap of her bag. “I’m sorry, I… I’m just worried,” she whispered.
“I don’t need you to worry about me!” Scarlett shouted, voice cracking with anger. “God, I don’t even care if you die right now, here, in front of me! You’re just a useless girl with nothing better to do!” She jabbed her finger at Y/N.
The words sliced through Y/N like glass. She clutched her bag tighter, throat tight. Scarlett shoved past her, leaving her in the middle of the hallway, eyes stinging with tears.
Y/N stood frozen, her vision blurring as tears welled in her eyes. She bit her lip to stop a sob from escaping. She’d given Scarlett everything—her love, her time, her heart—and now it all felt meaningless.
She wiped her tears and began to walk, her steps heavy. Scarlett’s words echoed in her head like a cruel mantra. The girl who gave her life meaning had just crushed her spirit.
I gave you everything I had, Y/N thought, and still, it wasn’t enough.
Days bled into weeks. Scarlett noticed the change before she would admit it: the emptiness first in the hallways, then in her chest. No Y/N leaning against her locker. No annoying voice calling her name. No teasing remarks to balance her bitterness. The hallways felt emptier. The benches seemed quieter. She found herself looking for Y/N out of habit, but Y/N was nowhere.
“Any sign of her?” Scarlett asked her friends one afternoon, setting her bag down.
“Nope,” Jeremy replied casually, a mouth full of food. “Why are you always asking?”
“She’s not like this, you know,” Scarlett said, frustration bleeding into her tone. “She wouldn’t just disappear.” she muttered.
Robert smirked. “Maybe she finally fell out of love with you.”
Scarlett glared at him, but Lizzie touched her arm gently.
“Guys!” Lizzie warned, then turned to Scarlett. “Maybe she’s just sick or something. Don’t worry.”
“I’ve checked her classes. She’s always absent. No texts, no sign of her anywhere. It’s been weeks,” Scarlett said, rubbing her temples.
Robert grinned. “Ha! You miss her.”
Scarlett shot him a glare but didn’t deny it. Lizzie put a hand on her back. “Why don’t you ask her best friend instead?”
Scarlett looked up. “What?”
“Why don’t you ask Hailee? She’s her best friend. She’ll know.”
Scarlett hesitated, then stood up and walked toward Hailee. “Uh, hey… Hailee?”
Hailee froze, then turned, eyes cold. “What do you want?” she asked flatly.
Scarlett blinked at the tone but pressed on.
“I just… wanted to ask where Y/N is. I haven’t seen her in a while.”
“And?” Hailee’s jaw tightened. “Why do you care? Shouldn’t you be happy she’s gone? That she finally stopped bothering you? I thought you’d be happy now that she’s finally out of your life,” Hailee said harshly.
“No. You know what? I don’t care. Don’t talk to me again.” Hailee shoved a folded piece of paper into Scarlett’s hands. “Here. I fucking hate you,” she spat before storming off.
Scarlett opened her mouth then closed it again. Scarlett stared after her, watched her storm away, then slowly unfolded the paper.
A week later, Scarlett knelt on the cold ground, fingers digging into the dirt, clutching the cold earth.
“Hey,” she whispered, her voice breaking and trembling. “At first, I didn’t believe it. I didn’t want to. I thought it was just some stupid prank, but… but now I can’t deny it anymore.” Her chest caved as the tears spilled freely.
The headstone bore Y/N’s name. Scarlett traced the letters with shaking fingers.
Tears slid down her cheeks. “I’m sorry,” she sobbed. “Please, tell me this is just a bad dream. I—I can’t… I can’t lose you.” Her words broke apart as her forehead pressed against the cold stone. “I like you too. God, I love you. I always did, but I was too stupid and scared to admit it.”
The wind blew softly around her as she trembled. Inside the paper had been the cemetery address. She’d denied it for days. But now, sitting here, it was real. Y/N was gone. She never got to tell her how she really felt.
“I shouldn’t have said those things. I didn’t mean it,” Scarlett whispered to the headstone. “You mean the world to me. I love how you constantly annoy me, how you tease me, how you’re just… there. I love how you… stayed. Always. I love when you’re with me because... I just feel you.” Her voice cracked as she laughed bitterly through tears.
Her fingers traced the carved letters of Y/N’s name. “Forgive me,” she choked. “I know nothing I say can bring you back. But I love you. I need you.”
She smiled faintly through her tears. “I love you so much, but now… now I can’t feel you.”
Scarlett stayed there, her sobs echoing in the quiet air.
The cemetery was silent except for her sobs. Scarlett clung to the grave, her heart shattering in ways she knew would never heal.
“I love you,” she whispered to the earth. “I love you... but I was too late.”
Scarlett's:
They warned me that one day I’d regret it. That one day, I’d look back and wish I had said the words I swallowed, the ones that clung to my throat whenever she smiled at me.
But I never listened.
I told her to shut up, to leave me alone, to stop following me around like a lost puppy. I told her she was useless. I told her I didn’t care if she disappeared.
And then she did.
Now, I’d give anything—everything—to hear her voice again. To roll my eyes at her stupid jokes. To groan when she calls me “lover” in front of everyone. I’d give anything to feel her beside me, annoying and persistent, alive.
Instead, all I have is this silence.
This heavy, suffocating silence that eats me alive every day.
I didn’t just lose her.
I lost myself the moment I pushed her away.
And the cruelest part?
I finally understand what love feels like.
But she’ll never know.
this one has been rotting in my drafts for about 8 months now, so i'm finally letting this one out of jail. (written years ago, so don't wonder why it's awful.)
ps: know that i was listening to taylor's new album while trying my best to salvage this fic that took more than 5 hours because i basically just rewrite everything (also while talking to the lovely and very sweet allthewintery, and we're in shock) so, please ignore if i failed to do that.