Please help I don't know what else to do

19 | They/Them Black Non binary Pansexual with adhd and due on rent https://ko-fi.com/pleasehelpmesurvive

[pleasehelpmesurvive]

Hi! It's me, I'm in fact alive! And since I'm alive and in a way better chapter of my life right now, I felt like writing in here to let you all know that YOU are part of the reason that I'm alive and standing today. That financial help you guys provided to me in those desperate times not only helped me hang on for a little longer but It honestly gave me something way more important which is hope, I'm sure I wouldn't have any to keep fighting if It wasn't for you guys and for that I'll be forever thankful. Also, some updates on my life: My parents are a lot better now, my mom even agreed to go to therapy as well! They are a lot more understanding of their impact on me and more respecting of my space, and they no longer think I'm faking my symptoms because I'm a spoiled brat trying to get some attention, so yay! I've got into college! Yeah, that's right! Guess who's studying to be a english teacher in july? This mf! That also means I get to apply to a part-time job related to my major! I'm also on therapy and I'm doing a lot better ever since I got into new meds! I'm 21 now and I can legally drink! ( lol ) I've got diagnosed with bipolarity type 2 and OCD also and am getting the proper treatment foe that! So yeah, that's about it folks! Thank you all for everything <3 and special thanks to @himboprince for boosting my campaign

[anderswasrightt]

don't use "ftm" it's outdated and offensive. it implies that the trans person was their agab, which we never were. i was always a boy, never a girl who became a boy.

i'm 35 years old. i've been IDing as trans or something similar to trans for nearly 20 years. i was probably calling myself FTM while you were playing tag during recess, anon.

i WAS a girl. i IDed as a girl early in my life. i recognized myself as a girl, called myself a girl, lived as a girl, and was a girl. who then IDed as a man. hence, F t M.

spend more time worrying about yourself instead of strangers on the internet, anon.

sorry not sorry if this comes off as needlessly hostile, but i've been getting a lot of shit from a lot of teenage trans kids about the language i use to describe my own goddamn experience, and i'm growing real fuckin weary of it.

i have elder trans friends who call themselves transsexuals and transvestites and trannies. are you going to seriously go to a 60-year-old trans person who survived the reagan years and tell her she's not allowed to use certain language to describe herself because it might offend the delicate sensibilities of some teenager on the internet?

do yourself a favor and log off, find some real-life trans people who are over the age of 20 or 25, and spend time talking to them instead of getting all holier-than-thou at random strangers on tumblr.

[femmefurina-deactivated20240814]

It may be weird to encounter because it's not the trans narrative that the media sells to us as 'the only valid way to be trans', but the 'I always knew I was x' is not all-encompassing.

Anon there are more people than you think who were girls who grew up into men, or boys who grew up into women, or girls or boys who grew up to be nonbinary. There is a rather obscure theory that girl and boy are distinct genders from man and woman and while the most common trajectory is that boys grow into men and girls grow into women it's not the rule.

Let people define themselves.

[phoenixtawnyflower]

also if you think genderfluid people are real and you're not just humoring us, you by definition have to allow that gender can change over time. I was a girl once. I am not a girl now.

[theleakypen]

Chiming in with solidarity to OP.

I feel very protective of my former identity BECAUSE there's so little room in the Mainstream Trans Narrative ™️ for allowing gender to change.

I was a girl. Now I'm genderqueer. Maybe later I will find different words for myself.

There has to be room for all of us in the trans community or there's no point to any of this.

[mirrepp]

Ive been here long enough to see words like ftm/mtf, afab/amab, transmale/female, trans man/woman all go through the cycle of ppl telling you to “Dont use X word its out dated. Now use this Y word”. Only for a year or two pass and suddenly “Y word is outdated. Now use Z word” like yall this is exhausting. Just because a word is old doesn’t automatically make it a slur or offensive.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

They're pulling high school clique bullshit out and just replacing 'uncool' with 'problematic' and pretending it's activism somehow. We're trying to get work done here not everybody is going to keep up with the ever-rotating lexicon of words.

[hedwig-dordt]

I used to be a member of the commentariat where I learned the phrase

THERE IS NO QUEER REVIEW BOARD

Which has kinda helped me be a bit better at being decent

[pleasehelpmesurvive]

update

Hi everyone, I'm still alive ( although things haven't been easy by any means, the fact I'm alive is largely thanks to you for giving me enough hope for at least trying to keep going even though things didn't work out in the end )

My parents actually did a lot of progress regarding helicoptering and just being overall narcissists ( Either that or I don't notice as much because the apartment on the second floor that belonged to my aunt is now being occupied by me ever since she moved which has been my saving grace and i rarely have panic attacks anymore )

I've been recently diagnosed with ADHD and Autism to the surprise of literally no one lol but as difficult as it was, those diagnosis have been very helpful in helping me understand myself and get the help that I need, it also helped me realize that I've recently developed autistic burnout.

But hey! I've got a place where I can temporarily isolate from my parents and shelter myself from stimuli, so that's a big win!

[mens-rights-activia]

If you’ve been waiting for a sign to leave him, this is it 👀👀👀👌👌👌

[comrade-rat]

This didn’t even need dialogue, those wigs told the whole fucking story

[firoivy]

If this queen just ends up being like a famous artist in mainstream media a la lizzo, cardi, nicki, doja, etc. id be so proud to have been here at her beginnings.

[carpetsharks]

Update I was right

[inkskinned]

i can't believe i have to fucking say it because i'm an educator so like how is it possible nobody else has said this.

unless a person is actively making materials/etc for children, they do not need to worry about your kid.

your child gets respect as a human. that's it. nobody's private life/artistic endeavors/unrelated interests must be controlled for the sake of your kid.

educators and athletes and artists do not have to live in chastity because your kid might see us on our days off. we do not owe it to your kid to only write poems about bunnies and only sing songs about tying your shoes. i do not care how much a person has given to children, if they are acting as an adult in adult spheres, they are allowed to. they are adults. it is your job as a caregiver to raise your kid and keep them out of adult spheres, not our job to keep ourselves out of those spheres just in case.

guess what! adult role models are going to bars and hooking up and dancing and being adults! this is so they have the mental energy to do all the child-centric things.

"it makes me feel weird to picture them like that!" i don't know how to tell you this but actors aren't actually their roles. the customer-service personality your waitress has is probably not her actual personality. the way teachers interact with students is not the way that they interact with their private lives, and it shouldn't be.

"this tells kids this kind of behavior is okay!" actually it's showing kids a normal and natural progression of a person's life, boundaries, and bodily autonomy. it's showing kids that adults are dynamic human beings. kids already know this. they know there's places they're not allowed and things they don't understand yet. it's just that you have icky feelings because you were raised in a society with black-and-white morality.

celebrities don't owe your children perfection, modesty, sobriety. and you know something? it's way healthier when they don't. "this is a person, who gets up every morning and does their job - but also has adult interests, which you'll learn about later" is way healthier as a role model than "you should be perfect like the curated image of this person and if you're not perfect you should be deeply ashamed."

anyway. idk why "think of the children!!!!" is making a comeback as a popular stance. but to be clear? it's a way of saying "this makes me feel uncomfortable, but i don't know why, and i don't feel like untangling it, so i'll blame you for it and hope you feel guilty about my children."

[inkskinned]

hi, op here. do not make this about "fandom drama." don't do it.

it is about the policing of black bodies, of minority communities, of queer expression, and of women in the workforce.

it is about real people in the real world. the notes are full of people who express the same thing: teachers who cannot buy wine with their dinner, social workers who have to cover up perfectly appropriate tattoos, queer folk who worry about bringing up their partner in the workplace. there are real-life, horrific, and ongoing consequences for this. real people get fired because they were in a picture holding a single beer, or they were seen wearing a too-saucy costume at halloween, or they kissed their partner in public on their day off. women have been fired for being the victim of revenge porn; their illegally distributed image instead just being seen as evidence against their character. there are queer artists that are actively being silenced because of this rhetoric. trans people fear using the fucking bathroom because of this rhetoric.

this is about the return of white nationalist slogans to a public stage. this is about how we are even seriously debating the phrase "think of the children". the children are not thought of during discussions of climate change, gun control, educational spending, free health care, student debt, access to childcare, access to food, or just getting the fucking vaccine and wearing a mask.

they do not care about the children. they want to protect their own bigotry by manipulating your empathy towards kids. that's what this post is about.

please acknowledge the systemic, ongoing process of erasing identity and freedom. it is not just some "internet discussion". it is a legitimate, scary, and powerful force that is hugely detrimental to the lives of those around you.

[liberalsarecool]

That $1000 is taxpayer funded, BTW. Our vindictiveness as a society is unsustainable.

[niceferatu]

idk which person with adhd needs to hear this today but you do NOT need that extra shot of coffee. it will break you

[ndiecity-deactivated20241101]

this one will fix me

[mioxenoblade]

“that character can’t be trans they never say they are in canon” weak, pathetic, ignorant

“any character can be trans because trans people arent aliens and lead lives just like their cis counterparts” epic, true, intelligent

[graceofgosh]

the reason why all internet content is created by either 4chan or tumblr is because both platforms have extremely low moderation(and what little exists is completely arbitrary) enforcement

the difference is 4chan's lax moderation is baked into the system and hands off by design while tumblr's lack of moderation is the hilarious result of what happens when you let people from brooklyn who don't know how to dress themselves in the morning become tech guys

[lordandgodoftheobvious]

(Source.)

[ID: Tweet thread by @LunaOi_VN, broken up into three images. Tweet 1:

Sometimes I forgot that I was born when Vietnam was still being comprehensively embargoed by the US.

The economic sanction was lifted when I was 15 and my life change drastically since then.

Lemme tell ya, sanction sucks.

[Tweet 2:

In the sanction time: - No fresh milk except this condensed milk. It was like super fancy at that time. - No soft drinks like Coke, pepsi… - Virtually no candies or cookies except when I was sick or it was Tet holiday, my mom would buy me some Hai Chau cookies.

[images of condensed milk and the aforementioned cookies]

[Tweet 3 (beginning of second image):

- No clean water. We had to drink yellow water from our well. - No stable electricity so of course there was no fridge, no oven, no electric rice cooker… - No gas/electric stove. I had to cook with straw/wood stove my whole childhood.

[Image of a pot of something being cooked in a fireplace] [image of two people getting water from a well]

[Tweet 4:

- No new clothes. I had to wear old clothes from my older brother. - When I was 10, I was chosen to study in art class but I could not join because my mom could not afford new art supplies for me. - Meat was somethign very fancy at that time. I could only eat beef twice a month.

[image of a set of colored pencils]

[Tweet 5:

- Virtually no medicine except for some basic anti-biotics and vitamins. - Mostly all the vaccines we had were from Cuba. Thanks, Cuba! And yes, Cubans vaccines are running through my veins to this day.

[Tweet 6 (beginning of third image):

After the sanction was lifted: - I finally could have some fresh milk. - Instant noodles became affordable. - Finally new clothes! Hell yeah! - More medicine, more vaccines.

[images of consumer food products, IDK]

[Tweet 7:

My final thought:

Fuck the US and its sanction!!!

And fuck YOU if you think sanction doesn’t affect a whole country’s economy and the life of millions of people just because the US says so.

[Tweet 8:

Vietnam was under US sanction for just 25 years, meanwhile Cuba has been under US sanction for 60 fucking years!!! That is I am so pissed at any fucking bootlickers and CIA-sympathizers who blaimed Cuba for what they has been going through. #HandsOffCuba

[End of thread. End description.]

[shitpostempire]

[pleasehelpmesurvive]

TW: Trauma, Venting, helicopter parenting

It baffles me how my mom and grandma spent years upon years stealing, hiding, discarding my stuff and then they have the nerve to act like I have no reason to be afraid of losing my things or having anything taken by them and try to convince me that it could never happen and they never did or would do that.

AND THEY GET OFFENDED IF YOU SAY ANYTHING LIKE THAT they also find it ridiculous when I call what they do abuse because " they had my best interest in mind and were/are just doing the best they could " as if by acknowledging their abusive behavior is somehow denying that? Anyway, life has been shit since I've bounced back here. Oh! and there's more! so my bank agency tried to contact me and for some reason they called her phone number ( I'm just as confused ) and they asked for me and she said I wasn't around and that she was my mother and they could speak to her instead AND I'M SO GLAD that they explicitly told her that I am an adult and that cannot happen. And she was the one telling me this! in a condescending tone as if it was surprising for people to treat me as the adult that I am.

[pleasehelpmesurvive]

I swear, this might become a vent blog

[pleasehelpmesurvive]

my body hurts so much today, feel like this is turning into a venting blog instead. prob changing my url

[pleasehelpmesurvive]

Well folks.. we tried, thanks everyone for the help

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to find a job then and so far I have had no luck with new interviews. I realized it wouldn't be possible to continue keeping my apartment solely on donations so I'm back at my parent's house. I would like to thank everyone that donated and helped, your help is appreciated still even though it didn't work in the end. I'm sorry for wasting everyone's time.

[sheabutterbitch]

Are Prisons Obsolete? by Angela Y. Davis

Here’s a free PDF of “Are Prisons Obsolete” if you are interested in gaining a deeper understanding of the prison abolitionist movement. This reading answers many of the questions you likely have regarding the call to abolish prisons and police.

One of the things I love about Angela Davis is that her writing style is so easily digestible, even when covering complex theory such as this. Do not be intimidated by the subject matter, it is fairly easy to grasp and I think everyone should read it.

[theparadigmshifts]

@hunybody​:  #as always: consider donating the price of this book to an org if you have the means #since we're all reading it for free #resources

[vitariesocks]

Happy Trans Day of Visibility 2021! This year, we celebrate Trans Week of Action and work against dangerous transphobic legislation progressing all over the U.S.