Words&More

Writing to escape and express. Perhaps some may find a home or inspiration.

[poetrybyntk]

Sometimes it feels like the world is ending and somedays it feels like new beginnings with new hopes and highs and dreams to conquer… somedays I feel a mix of both - in between pain and happiness lies an existence I am yet to comprehend or feel. Surely the world is filled with memories of new and old and past and now and maybe even tomorrow. I truly wonder where my heart rests in the days that follow me, like a debt to paid, a promise to be fulfilled or a blessing to be appreciated.

I do wonder what will be of me when it’s all said and done and I am done with saying and doing and repeating old memories like a broken record with a tune worn and still sweet to give some hope of course.

-ntk | feeling feelings

[quotemadness]

If you don’t love yourself you will always be chasing after people who don’t love you either.

Mandy Hale

[loveletters2myself]

i find peace in nature, the moon, sunsets, smell of fresh coffee, a fresh breeze, books, poetry, flowers, the smell of rain, and hugs from those i love.

[resimlerdekaldik-deactivated202]

[carpethedamndiemdejavu]

- James Baldwin talking about Love

[letsbelonelytogetherr]

— W.H. Auden

[raveezus]

⠀

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

"No one is treasured more in this world than someone who lightens the burden of another." - Unknown

[poetrybyntk]

Letting go can be scary sometimes-

Especially when you don’t want to, especially when you have been holding on for so long - that pain of holding on feels like a familiar friend and the safety of the other side looks like a foreign land.

Letting go can be the worst feeling- like pulling apart yourself, like splitting yourself into past and present and leaving a piece of yourself in the past, like staring at a pile of rubble and wondering how you start again and how you will ever feel like you again-

Letting go can be the hardest thing to do- especially when you’re trying to hold everything together, especially when you’ve spent so long holding on -

Letting go can be scary and painful and isolating, but on the other side of letting go is an unfamiliar peace of existing without force or chaos or whatever keeps you up at night. On the other side of letting go is another opportunity to hold on to things that matter and hold you back - that reciprocate your efforts and welcome you with smiles and gratitude and peace and love. The unfamiliar feeling of starting over again, the openness to change, the shifting tides of emotions and the grieving of what was - moving forward is scary but watching yourself slowly decay at the pain is a worse fate than the uncertainty of tomorrow-

-ntk

[poetrybyntk]

Sometimes loneliness creeps in and entices you with sad tales and memories of what never happened - loneliness isolates and looks down on you and tells you to compare and contrast yourself with others-

Sometimes loneliness makes you feel less than yourself because you start believing you are less than-

Sometimes you start believing that you don’t deserve happiness or love or peace or anything good because you are undeserving-

Then in the midst of hopelessness -there is a smile of a friend, a video of a stranger that makes you laugh, a cover that comforts you, a prayer that consoles you, a message that guides you, a hand that holds you, a strength that refuses to lose, a love that embraces you and a purpose that grows gradually from the little moments that aren’t that little when counted in a row

-ntk | gratefulforyou

[poetrybyntk]

Have you heard from love?

No? Neither have I

Has it called you back and called you beautiful? When was the last time you saw love?

Passing by you, did you recognize it. Love. Did you call it by its name? You know the affectionate names - the endearing ones. That leave you reminiscent to a kaleidoscope of butterflies.

Are you love? I am not Love either. Love isn’t here. It only passes through me.

Trapped in minds of the Unsuspecting and naive.

It’s okay. If love isn’t here yet.

I am sure it will come - you know like last time when it promised to stay and it Did -

But then it didn’t...

Have you heard from love?

-ntk

[poetrybyntk]

Secrets. What do you know of secrets?

Heavy words placed unto you - Living in a house with no windows

No one to hear you or see you -

Carrying secrets turn you into a mystery,

Dissolved - no one to solve you

-canyoukeepasecret|ntk

[poetrybyntk]

It’s a game- we Morph into what we need

It’s a game of giving

I am a vase, and you’re a cup

Never equally filling each other

My love comes in quantity, so much so it’s hard to hold - true to its quality

Your love comes in droplets,light enough to carry, yet never enough to fill

-ntk

[poetrybyntk]

They are some scars that are not visible - not because they don’t exist - because they are hidden, like treasure the kind that can’t be found without a map -

They are some scars that are in array - for prying eyes like yours and mine to witness and say nothing but share a smile

They are some scars, that go deep, that come with surfaces, that you can never reach, and if you do, there’s no going back to “once was”. Some surfaces entrap you and entice you,a spell...

Yet most scars, they heal.

-ntk

[poetrybyntk]

Sometimes it’s easier to stay silent

Even when I want to yell, even when I want to cry, even when I want to say “wait” even when I want to say “don’t leave” -

Sometimes, most times it’s easier to stay silent when my mind goes round and around - even when my heart aches and even when my eyes flood - sometimes it’s easier to just sit still and silent - sometimes a wave of many dreams, many things, many more of my hopes and things to do pass by me and I stay silent for the moment holding onto the quiet-

-ntk

[poetrybyntk]

Say the right thing - do the right thing

Don't make a mistake, don't sit like that, don't say that, don't wear that, don't become attached too soon, don't dance like that, don't be like that, cheer up and smile...

Like walking on shattered glass or hot concrete ground

Like staring at a distorted image or unatangling threads

There was a discomfort in being me, there was a disconnection between who I am and what I did. I felt like a guest in my body, I felt like a ghost that visted the present every now and then, I lived in the past - my body was here, in this moment but I wasn't.

I felt like I was waiting to be saved, waiting for some miraculous event of inspiration to occur, some grand turn to help me be Me...

Then in stillness, in my weakest point, in rock bottom, where hope felt like a myth

I felt a crack, I felt an opening, an awakening -

to be better, to be me, to feel my feelings, to see my pain and to see the present.

In the tears, in the moment of reflection, in the quiet, where God was my only company

I started seeing the strength in me

I choose me, I fought for me, I believed in me

I realized my strength was within, that I was capable of saving me.

I realized I can do it, I can save myself, one step at a time, I just have to keep walking forward no matter how heavy it is to, no matter how hard it is to take a step forward, I just need to take a step.

Do it scared, do it unsure, do it brave, and do it anyway - despite it all.

Despite all the things that tried to hold me back - I did it anyways, I took one step forward

-hopefully|ntk

[quotefeeling]

“A book can teach you, a conversation can assure you, a poem can seduce you, a genius can inspire you but only you can save yourself.”

— Anthony Anaxagorou

[poetrybyntk]

Coffee with You -

I prefer something passionate and warm,

A consistent and endearing affection.

I prefer something slow and gentle,

I prefer a slow burn,

- like a cup of coffee in the cold or holding hands in the middle of a crowd, or mellow sunshine shining on your cheeks.

Something enticing and refreshing,

Something steady and captivating,

Something calm and exciting.

Something like having coffee with You in the morning and evening and all the days that have You in them.

-coffeefortwopls|ntk