I beat vaginismus after 5 years
Vaginismus sufferers! If I can do it you can do it. Here's what I did: - Dilators: I bought a set of 4 and did them as often as I felt like it (this may have been every day, once a week, I didn't have much of a set routine). I used a lot of lube and sometimes watched porn too as being aroused really helps to get them in. I made a diary to track my progress with them - I tried to become excited about sex/have a positive mindset towards sex... which I had lost after trying and failing for so long. Porn helped with this! Also watching penetration asserted to myself that penises do fit in vaginas and one will fit in mine! Seeing it as a thing that can happen easily and pain free re-motivated me to go for it. I also visualised pain free sex a lot- I think this step may have made the most difference. - thought about my muscles. When dialating and attempting penetration I would put my shoulders down, breathe, located any tension in any muscles and tried to relax them. - thought about my pelvic muscles/vagina muscle and consciously relaxed it. Also visualised my vagina as a wide, open hole (may sound strange, but makes a lot of difference) Sex had been impossible for me- I never thought I could do it. But I did it! This problem can feel so isolating and make you feel to helpless. I really hope these tips can help someone. Feel free to message me if you want to ask anything. You can do it. Good luck!!!