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Body Recreation What you'll need: • A standard tub 240-300 healthy chickens • Most (if not all) of the body or skeleton of the being you're recreating. you MUST have the head or skull. if you do not, the ritual WILL NOT work • Blood of the Master (optional). The more blood you use, the more control you'll have • A cup of chamomile strongly brewed in saltwater • A cup of cumin • A cup of raw kidney beans • A cup of columbine • One moonflower • Pig's brain (optional) Step 1) bleed the chickens into the tub one by one. get as much of the blood into the tub as possible. scrap the bodies but keep the heads (you'll need them later) Step 2) drop the body or skeleton into the blood (preferably feet first and head last). Step 3) mix the saltwater chamomile with the cumin, kidney beans, and colombine. pour it slowly into the tub (preferably around the head and/or heart) Step 4) if you want the being to have a mind of their own, place the pig's brain into the tub around the head area. if you want a mindless minion, skip this step Step 5) if you want to control the being, bleed freshly into the tub. the more blood you use, the more control you'll have. (genetically female casters have the upper hand in this ritual, as menstrual blood is significantly more powerful because it is created in the womb and it doesn't have to be as fresh). if you do not want control over the being, skip this step. WARNING if you have skipped step 4 as well, the being will be an uncontrolable, rampageous monster Step 6) take the chicken heads that you saved earlier and set them up around the tub starting at the top (where the head is) right and moving counter-clockwise. face them all Northward Step 7) float the moonflower in the middle of the tub. if the previous steps have been completed correctly, the flower will sink. if the flower floats, the being's spirit has passed on and they cannot be recreated. it is important that you abandon the ritual at this point and complete the standard purifying steps Step 8) stand at the bottom of the tub (where the feet are), face the tub and look at the place where the moonflower sunk (it should be rippling lightly), and say the spell loudly and clearly If you have completed the ritual and said the spell correctly, the recreated being should rise from the tub. BEWARE they will likely be confused, scared, weak and extremely hungry. WARNING if they are not fed within an hour of waking, steps 4 and 5 will be for naught and they will become a mindless, rampageous monster (with the added feature of being extremely hungry). Contrary to popular belief, recreated beings ARE NOT soulless. In fact, the ritual cannot be completed unless the spirit of the being you seek to recreate is present. Therefore, creating a mindless minion is considered extremely inhumane because the spirit is still intact but would have no control over their body. Mindless does NOT mean emotionless.

Pros and Cons of Dating Max Trevelyan

Pros • has a ridiculous sex drive, if you're into that, but would be completely okay with a non-sexual romance too • will hold hands with you whenever you want • always warm. Are you cold? Not anymore • will carry you around if you get tired • grows beautiful flowers for lovers • hygienic • ready to hug 24/7 and is good at hugs • will fight anyone you ask him to • writes sappy love poems and gets flustered about it • charitable • freckles Cons • has literally no concern for his own safety and is extremely reckless with his own life • needs to be needed most of, if not all, the time • deals with stress extremely poorly • holds himself to ridiculous standards • awful singer • uses evasive humor and has a hard time being serious, even when it's important

#ocs #my ocs #dragon age inquisition #max trevelyan

Children in clan Lathvhen are raised communally, but parents are often involved in some capacity. While many children are taken from other places in Thedas, it is a taboo for someone to claim a child as theirs if the child is not theirs biologically.

#lathvhen traditions

Zera Lavellan, the tiniest

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Fey Things

• says things that make no sense; if he had a conversation with Cole, literally no one could translate • weepy, but who can blame him • sasses and flirts with people who are a threat to him • is a pacifist • collects beetles to feed fish • has probably never worn a shoe in his life • looks like G rated flower crown Disney prince but is actually R rated and probably thinking about banging his boyfriend at any given moment • accidentally says sexual things • forgives and forgets pretty much anything • has the face puppies make when you ban them from the sofa • keeps 4 million pillows on his bed • stubborn as fuck

potato-ocs

• is only sort of a pacifist. He won’t kill, doesn’t approve of killing ever, but he will fight you. With teeth, fingernails, whatever.

• don’t forget he follows the God of rebellion for a reason

• despite not seeming it at all, is actually a bit of a hot-head. He’s very emotional in general and can let anger get the best of him at times.

• passive aggressive when he is angry.

• relentlessly antagonized the woman who owned and tortured him (which ended up making the torture worse, but he didn’t care)

• gives second chances only to those who deserve them. Forgiving and forgetting doesn’t mean responding to someone’s existence ever again.

• eventually learns to use force magic to “see”. He creates micro-vibrations that give him a sense of shapes around him. These vibrations are nearly undetectable, making him a dangerous entropic Mage yet again. He won’t kill you, but he’ll make you sleep and leave you to whoever he is with.

• is an extremely powerful dreamer and seer. The fade is his playground, time is his masterpiece.

• can still read elvish if it’s carved into something so he can feel the letters

• sees about 10 years into the future. This is subjective. Usually it is less than this, but dreams during fever or drug-induced states can push past that limit. Before his eyes were taken, he saw about 5 years with the same fickle nature. He actually saw further when he was very, very young. As he learned to control his gift, the visions became more stable and showed more for a specific event, but he wasn’t able to see as far (though when he was a child, his visions were a garbled mess he could barely understand)

• has a random connection to weather in Val Royeaux. He has visions about it often and has never been wrong, ever. He doesn’t understand this, as he has never even been there.

• possibly leaves a trail of magic elf babies in his wake (I only know of two kids he has, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he has more)

• apt to wander off into the woods in the middle of the night

• stubbornly tries to get around on his own right after his eyes are taken away. Bumps into and falls over literally everything.

• idolized the Dalish elves as a child, but was severely disappointed when he finally went to live with them at the age of 18. He enjoys life in the forest and the free(ish) use of magic, but he was always an outsider because of his sympathy for the Dread Wolf.

• does not consider himself Dalish. When talking about Lavellan (when he was still with them), he referred to them as “the clan I live with” rather than “my clan”

• sympathizes with the Dread Wolf and follows a life path in which He is key, but does not necessarily believe He is a god. He follows him more in the sense that one would follow a mentor.

• extremely honest, sometimes at great personal cost. (I don’t mean “I’m not rude I’m just brutally honest”, no no, but more like he won’t lie to protect himself. To protect others, maybe. And he’s open to withholding truth at times, but never outright lying just to protect himself)

• worries constantly about his subtle manipulations of timelines. He sees multiple futures and chooses the one with the best outcome. This does not always go according to plan, though, as time is very fickle.

#ocs #my ocs #feyneral lathvhen

Zatlen Things

• is scary and intimidating when you don’t know him; wherever he goes, tales of slavers being mysteriously executed follow; he leaves an urban legend in his wake of cursed paths and slavers warning other slavers not to go there, lest they be slit and left to rot • if you’re not a slaver or someone who oppresses freedom of many people, he is not as scary • secretly loves puns • has the coldest feet possible at all times, will stick them to you • very protective • doesn’t sleep at night; he takes catnaps throughout the day instead • a highly skilled stealth assassin; he is credited with exactly 0 kills • when he was younger, he broke into places to memorize useful info and then sold it to thieves • broke into the Gallows and left obscure threats for asshole Templars when he lived in Kirkwall • skilled crafter and enchanter; he creates fabrics with magic woven in • took it upon himself to protect every elf in the alienage and every peaceful Tal-Vashoth in nearby camps and villages, alone • will debate about anything at any time; he is always Ready To Fight (with words…or swords, if that’s what you want) (it isn’t, trust me, you’ll lose) • worships the Maker and thinks the elven pantheon is probably made up of pricks (not that the Maker isn’t one, but at least the Maker is open about abandoning the world, instead of pretending he’s still around) • steals tithes from the Chantry and uses the gold how it’s supposed to be used • squishy • lightly graying hair (stress, mostly) • is 100% exasperated with politics at all times • is an incredibly intense lover (like, romance novel level; shoving against walls, hushed confessions) • can hold his liquor. Do not challenge this man to a drinking competition. He will be in a drunken stupor pretty quickly but he’s not going down or getting sick. • debates during sex • big peen • wears leather pants a bit too tight and has a great ass • the hot history professor of your dreams honestly • smooth af • flirts by provoking debates • probably gets turned on by debating • I’m stopping now because it’s become obvious that I’m a little obsessed

#ocs #my ocs #zatlen lavellan

Blood Child Ritual (female) What you'll need: • One heart (cow, pig, sheep, etc but NOT human) from an adult animal of good health • A cup of pink petals (from any non-poisonous plant) • A cup of the father's blood • A cup of the mother's blood (it is preferable that the parents be volunteers, but it is not necessary) • Ice, snow, or any other cold substance that you can fill a tub with • One hot ember • Rose petals (any color but black or white) (different colors affect personality. Red : courage and passion; Pink : happiness and gentleness; Light pink : sympathy, sweetness, and grace; Yellow : delight and jealousy; Orange : enthusiasm and greed; Peach : sincerity; Pale peach : modesty; Lavender : magical prowess; Blue : mysterious and argumentative) More than one color can be used. • Lamb blood • A metal bowl large enough to hold all the ingredients (except the cold substance) • A copper needle • Black thread of natural fiber • A tub large enough to hold a significant amount of the cold substance. preferably not so deep that the cold substance will cover the bowl if it sinks (this is not necessary, but it will make things easier) Step 1) cut open the heart and cut out the inner bits until it is an empty container and eat the inner bits (raw or cooked, but not salted or seasoned) Step 2) fil the heart with the pink petals Step 3) sew the heart back together with the needle and thread. set it aside for now Step 4) fill the tub with the cold substance Step 5) place the metal bowl into this container, floating on top, there should be none of the cold substance inside the bowl (don't fret if a little splashes in, sop it up with a cloth, but it's okay if the bowl isn't completely dry) Step 6) place the heart into the center of the bowl with the bottom pointed towards you Step 7) pour the father's blood around the heart, clockwise, starting at the top Step 8) pour the mother's blood onto the center of the heart slowly, coat as much of the heart as you can, but DO NOT move the cup until the blood stops flowing (it is okay to stop if only droplets are coming out) Step 9) cover this in rose petals. if you have more than one color, place the most color with the most desired aspect on the bottom, so that it will be closest to the heart Step 10) pour the lambs blood into the bowl at the bottom of the heart (DO NOT move until the bowl is full) while saying the beginning of the spell (all but the last line). fill the bowl completely. if you've completed the previous steps and said the spell correctly, the bowl won't sink. If it sinks, abandon the ritual or risk creating a monstrosity (if that is your intention, continue on) Step 11) sprinkle the leftover petals into the bowl (so that the blood child won't be spoiled and wasteful) Step 12) drop the ember (shouldn't be removed from the fire until needed) into the center of the bowl and say the last line of the spell Step 13) have the father press the mother's face into the bowl (if you are creating a monstrosity, her face should be submerged as much as possible to create a stronger monster) Congratulations, it's a girl (or a female monster)! All that's left is to wait the normal human gestation period for the blood child to be born. If the ritual was successful, there will be no complications. Most mothers die when birthing monstrosities, but almost none die birthing a successful blood child (however, she will be very weak so she should not be left alone to do this). Contrary to popular belief, blood children ARE NOT soulless. There are many hostless spirits wandering the realm of the living, and the beginning of the spell serves to call upon them. The lamb's blood prevents spirits from taking the blood child as a host before it is ready (which would result in them keeping their memories), and the ember is to burn away and purify the spirit so that it becomes a blank slate for the blood child to build on. So, as a reminder, blood children ARE NOT soulless. Technically, they are reincarnated beings.

#um #a thing??

Max Trevelyan Things

• deals with stress poorly • holds himself to a ridiculously high standard which (luckily) he usually meets • is a sunshine puppy but is also an extremely clever and skilled spy • a menace; he loves to prank people (harmlessly, of course), and he teases and frustrates his bf endlessly during important meetings • has -4 shame; openly flirts in public, has no problems with PDA, and will walk across Skyhold in his undies without a second thought • a human heater; he is always warm, his hands are warm. You’re cold? Cuddle up to him and your problem will be solved • built like a fucking brick house; he is a wall of solid muscle, a behemoth • reckless; he has fallen off cliffs and down stairs (etc) more times than he can count, he acts as a meat-shield in battle • of the 207 bones in an adult human body, Max has broken or at least fractured 198 of them at least once in his life • he can probably lift you • is not allowed to wear fabrics with no give because he flexes and pops the seams • plant nerd; he has an extensive knowledge of most plants and herbs • also knows a lot about poisons and potions • creates experimental potions, poultices, and poisons, then tests them on himself • develops a poultice that relieves pain without completely numbing nerves and sells the recipe to the Inquisition for a royalty fee • advocates against the sale of halla products (excluding milk) • picky eater • knows some Elvish • can do spot-on voice impressions • talks to plants • has an awful singing voice but doesn’t care and sings anyway, loudly • can juggle; he likes juggling knives best • hoards pillows • writes letters home to the horsemaster with letters for her to read to his horse, Starlight • very hygienic • looks with his hands; he struggles with the urge to touch everything • wants to hug everyone, all the time • has visual hallucinations • is Ready To Fight 24/7 • his ribcage is distorted from being broken so many times, making his lung capacity lower than it should be • talks with a lot of hand gestures • uses evasive humor; he has a hard time being 100% serious, ever • writes love poems for his bf and gets so flustered about it • asks Bull for sex advice because he’s a virgin • hates the Chantry with the burning fury of a thousand suns • Anders is more or less his celebrity crush and he keeps a copy of the manifesto by his bed • very restless; he needs to be needed, needs to be helping and providing for something in some way. He withers and fades when he isn’t needed. • once entered a swordsmanship competition drunk; he realizes now that it was a bad idea • has some training as a surgeon • exhibitionist • fits Tony Stark’s “genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist” trope • has very few freckles on his face, but has them in vast quantity elsewhere • will fist fight if disarmed

#ocs #my ocs #dragon age inquisition #max trevelyan

Fey Things

#ocs #my ocs #feyneral lathvhen

Ilo Lavellan Things

• hates shemlen • distrusts all Templars, Mages, and people from Tevinter • would rather be taking a nap at all times • fucking loves sandwiches • mom friend but also the wine aunt • dimples!! • plays with her hair when nervous, but is usually nervous so it's hard to see that it's a nervous habit and not just a habit • very hoarse crackly voice • smokes elfroot and blood lotus in a pipe • swears 24/7 • dropped a coin into the anchor • thinks the anchor looks like a vagina • makes and accepts ridiculous dares • will take her pants off if asked without questioning the asker • delivered babies in Lavellan • extremely protective of her younger brother • is not afraid to start wars over people she cares about • is very distrustful and if you lie to her, she won't forgive you

#ocs #my ocs #dragon age inquisition #inquisitor #ilo lavellan

Laurel Trevelyan Things

• cynical as fuck; makes disgusted faces at cute couples, but he is secretly jealous and sad that love doesn't exist • silver tongued, can talk his way in or out of almost anything • born with a silver spoon in his mouth but got tired of the taste by the time he was 11 • "the pretty one" • went into the Deep Roads with a group of wardens when he was 19 • briefly worked as a spy for Loghain during the fifth blight, but switched sides after meeting some wardens • drinks too often honestly • tells embarrassing stories about his lil siblings after enough drinks • plays the game very well; so well, in fact, that he almost ended up married to an Orlesian noblewoman while disguised as a servant and spying on her father because the man liked him so much • bendy • can skip rocks really well • allergic to bees • hates the Chantry • refers to Anders as "Harbinger" but in a positive way? • he is more Orlesian than anything else but he is still 100% dog lord • may or may not have gotten to second base with Queen Anora

#ocs #my ocs #dragon age inquisition #laurel trevelyan

Max Trevelyan is a behemoth of muscle.

#ocs #my ocs #dragon age inquisition #max trevelyan

Renan Lavellan Things

• lip scar; he went on his solo hunt during mating season and a buck knocked him down a small water fall, he smacked his face on some rocks; he runs his tongue over the scar a lot because it feels weird • he loves to make food; and he loves to make people’s favorite foods for them • he fucking loves dragons • he is terrified of the dark • very kissable lips • got Elgar'nan Vallaslin because he located a bandit camp that had been harassing the clan and set it on fire; it was pretty effective • little spoon • pretty tall (for an elf), 5'8, but smol inside

#ocs #my ocs #dragon age inquisition #renan lavellan

Aurin Things

• he takes at least ten minutes every morning to wing his eyeliner • he uses force magic to hold books open so he can lounge and read • he sasses Corypheus • he sticks his tongue out when he concentrates • he will happily walk 100 miles through swamp to find a book but if you try to get him out in the hot sun to find an enemy, he's going to complain your ears off • he has freckles, so many freckles • he sleeps sprawled out, limbs everywhere; he's only 5'3 but when he sleeps comfortably, he will give the illusion of being much bigger • he has sensitive teeth, but he loves sweets, so he makes a not pleasant face when he eats sweets • the sun hurts his big delicate blue eyes so he squints a lot • he is allergic to cats • he is terrified of birds; a giant slimy gross spider-like demon is fine and dandy but a pigeon will make him cry • he often forgets that most people don't speak elvish • he loves Chantry history; he has an extensive knowledge of the Chantry from all the books he has read on it • he loves speculative literature; he believes following anything blindly is the worst mistake anyone can make • he is horrible with traps; if there is a trap, he will get caught in it • he is a thin gangly thing; if you saw him standing alone without height reference, you might mistake him for being taller than he is • his voice is high and uneven in pitch; it often breaks when he shouts • he is the blushiest blushy to ever blush; he will turn red as a tomato at the slightest praise • he seems prickly but he really likes to cuddle, like...so much; as a young Dalish lad he fantasized about cuddling and having limbs tangled with a lover • he has never been kissed (at the beginning of inquisition at least, Fen later kisses him) • he blushes when he is mad too • his ears blush, he blushes literally all over

#ocs #my ocs #dragon age inquisition #inquisitor #aurin lavellan

I title this post too many fucking elves

#I mean really #this is just absurd

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