✿Esskeetit✿

Melyssa 😋• 26 •The only straight I am's a straight up bitch • Stoner💨• Designer handbag and makeup enthusiast💄 💵Spend fiddies, pet kitties, suck titties 🐱 🖤I like my eyelashes as black as my heart and as long as the list of people I wanna punch in the face🖤

[flowerbunniii]

life is bam margera and i’m unfortunately phil

[egberts]

lububus should come with a webkinz style code for labubu world. and you should be allowed to do cocaine in labubu world

[animentality]

[cervezaa]

[segamascott]

[redstonedust]

its funny when events that probably couldve been traumatic dont bother you so you'll end up casually dropping stuff like "so after that time i almost got lost at sea as a kid-" and theyll be like WHAT and youre like. oh yeah dont worry its just part of my lore. its honestly not even a top five interesting backstory moment. focus please.

[squidsmeister]

something vindictive but ultimately harmless I do at work is that if you’re at my register and you’re rude to me and you pay with cash I am finding the most disgusting desolate fucked up unspeakable coin I can to give to you. oh you were mean to me? you’re getting the yucky nickel bitch

[ifdragonscouldtalk]

Could yall stop shooting each other outside my window im trying to masturbate

[ifdragonscouldtalk]

So this was actually the sound of my car getting stolen

[babyripgut]

[wavnexttimedotcom]

06/16/16

[pyrrhiccomedy]

when my shelter cat passes by me, he pauses for a second, and looks up. He is waiting for me to lean down, and touch my hand against his side, so that when he keeps walking, my hand skims across his fur. he doesn't really need attention. he has his own thoughts and plans. but after more than a year of living in our home, he has come to expect a moment of kindness whenever he crosses my path. if I don't do it, he will follow me. "where is your hand?" he asks, with his plaintive and impatient eyes. I give it to him. he bumps against it like a balloon before wandering away. this is a poem to me

[pyrrhiccomedy]

This post has gone so much further than I expected it to. This is my sweet cat. His name is Eddie Potato.

[chayawaxman]

the vibe i bring to the function

[bronzetomatoes]

Cannot even fault them for that that's funny as fuck

[anatthema-art]

inspired by a friend misspeaking

[cherryfleischer-deactivated2026]

[sudanese-deactivated20250510]

[kushblazer666]

and they say white people can’t cook